Chapter Ten: The First Place
That day was a Hogsmeade day. Ermengarde was pale and puffy-eyed from no sleep and was having trouble keeping up with the boys' conversations. It wasn't until they reached the Three Broomsticks pub that Ermengarde could register where exactly they were.
"Come on, then, Ermengarde," said Remus, holding the door for her. "You look like you could do with a bit of a rest."
Ermengarde allowed herself to be ushered to a table by Remus and immediately put her head on her arm. She felt a hand on her back.
"Oh, dear. What's the matter, darling?"
It was a woman speaking, and Ermengarde jumped, not knowing who on Earth it could be. The woman was short and plump with a round-featured face, very motherly and very sweet.
"I, uh..." said Ermengarde, but she trailed off and glanced at the boys for an introduction, her old shyness suddenly bubbling up to the surface again.
"Oh, this is Madam O'Leary. She runs the pub," said James. "Madam O'Leary, this is Ermengarde Switoviak. She's the new bird at Hogwarts."
"Lovely, lovely," said Madam O'Leary. "Now then, what's ailing you, darling? Bit of a rough time getting over O.W.L. exams, was it? Nasty things, those were...I got eleven, mind you!"
"Not bad," said Sirius, obviously impressed.
"I'm just...I'm tired," said Ermengarde lamely.
"Such a shame, too...beautiful girl, y'are! But I take it she's a studious one?" Madam O'Leary asked the others, who nodded. "Nothing wrong with being clever, mind you, but when you take to staying up into the wee small hours of the morning making sure you get your homework done...well, it takes a toll on the body, it does! I suppose it'll be the usual, will it, boys? Butterbeers? And what'll it be for the lady?"
Ermengarde's mind was still trying to process her being called "beautiful". It was a new experience for her and she felt her face burn. Madam O'Leary took Ermengarde's face in her hands and made a tutting noise.
"I suppose you'll need something to wake yourself up a bit, won't you, dear?" she said warmly.
"Yes, please," said Ermengarde gratefully.
"I've got just the thing," said Madam O'Leary with a wink, and she was off.
"Now then, are you going to tell us why you got such a fright from that...whoever earlier?" asked Sirius quietly, leaning across the table towards Ermengarde.
"Well, first of all, you can't Apparate within the Hogwarts grounds," said Ermengarde. "That's a start. Second of all, I want to know what he was playing at, looking up at my window like that. Third of all...um...I've forgotten."
"You need sleep, Swi," said James. "You can't keep staying up all night. You know that. It's terrible for you."
"She was scared, Prongs," said Remus. "And honestly, can you blame her?"
"No," said James. "I guess not. It's strange, isn't it?"
"He looked like...well, he looked like this thing...that I know about...that none of you will know about...yet. But you will someday. You especially," said Ermengarde blearily, pointing at James. "Most unfortunately. And you'll know far too much about them as well, Sirius. And Remus...well, don't get too attached to anyone just yet. And Peter...you'll bloody know them as well."
A long silence followed her rambling. The Marauders stared at her in utter amazement. As soon as she realized what had just come out of her mouth, Ermengarde began to panic. There was no way they could have actually understood any of that, was there? Fortunately, Madam O'Leary brought over their drinks at that exact moment. She handed each of the boys a butterbeer and put down a mug of what looked like coffee in front of Ermengarde.
"Drink that right up now, lass," she said. "It'll do you good."
Ermengarde cautiously took a sip while Madam O'Leary watched. It tasted like a rich, chocolaty coffee – but Ermengarde suddenly choked as a spicy sensation attacked her tonsils. Remus and Sirius clapped her on the back.
"What – what is this?" Ermengarde sputtered.
"I put a dash of Pepperup Potion in there," said Madam O'Leary. "It'll do you a world of good, now drink up!"
"All right...thank you," said Ermengarde.
Madam O'Leary bustled off. Now that Ermengarde knew what to expect with the coffee drink, it actually wasn't bad. The initial shock of the Pepperup Potion had worn off and Ermengarde found herself becoming more and more awake with each sip.
"This is quite good," she commented. "She could sell this as a drink on its own...it really warms you up. Of course, today there's no need for warmth...but in the winter..."
"So, er, what were you babbling about earlier? The...person-thing...you said it looked like something you knew about," said Remus softly.
"This...well, this isn't something I can discuss where others can hear us," said Ermengarde. "I don't actually even know if I should discuss it in the first place...particularly with you four."
"Why not? We're supposed to be your friends, aren't we?" asked James indignantly.
"Of course you're my friends," said Ermengarde impatiently. "It's just that this is very complicated and all very mixed up and I'm not even entirely sure why I'm here in the first place because I never studied at Beauxbatons in the first place. For heaven's sake, I don't even speak French in the first place, so how could I? Well, I mean, I know the odd word or two...bonjour, parlez-vous francais, and au revoir and whatnot, but certainly not enough to have studied in France! And I've always known that Remus was a werewolf so I didn't even have to venture a guess about that so you could have told me about that in the first place. And I really shouldn't tell you anything else because if I do, it could totally alter the future and ruin a lot of people's lives so I really should just stop talking all together and I shouldn't have said anything in the first place. Wow, but this Pepperup Potion has quite a kick to it!"
Another very long silence followed these words, which were all said very quickly and in a very high-pitched tone. Remus put a hand on Ermengarde's forehead.
"Are you feeling okay, Ermengarde?" he asked concernedly.
"I'm fine, but I shouldn't have said anything in the first place."
"Why does she keep saying 'first place'?" Sirius muttered to James.
"So...so if you're not from France, where are you from?" asked Peter.
"Here," said Ermengarde.
"Here as in Britain?" asked Sirius.
"Here as in Hogwarts," said Ermengarde. "I've never even been to France."
"But if you've been here all along, how is it that we didn't know you before?" asked Remus.
"Because you wouldn't know me now," said Ermengarde. "I'm...I can't say."
"Then let's go somewhere you can say," said Remus. "And no more of this coffee stuff!"
Remus took her mug away and Sirius summoned Madam O'Leary.
"Thanks so much, Madam O'Leary, but we've really got to be going now," he said. "How much do we owe you?"
"Oh, don't worry about it, darling! Heaven knows you four make me laugh, that's payment enough! Just be sure to visit me this summer, won't you? And do let me know what you get on your exams. And Ermengarde, dear, it was nice to meet you. Now, you make sure these boys behave themselves, you hear? If they get fresh, you let me know!"
Madam O'Leary winked and strode off. The Marauders left quickly, Ermengarde's heart racing and her hands shaking violently from the rush of energy the drink had given her. Remus noticed her trembling.
"Just take deep breaths," he muttered. "It'll all be okay."
"I can't believe this," she kept saying over and over. "I've ruined everything. Everything."
"You haven't ruined anything," said Remus. "Calm down. We'll sort this out."
They headed back to Hogwarts and went straight to an empty classroom. Ermengarde sat down on a desk and started jiggling her foot, trying to think of how to explain what had happened to her when she wasn't even entirely sure what had happened to her.
"Okay," she said finally. "Here's the thing. I'm...I'm not from this time."
"All right..." said Sirius slowly, as though speaking to someone who was very slow. "You're from...when, then?"
"Twenty years into the future," said Ermengarde simply.
The boys looked at each other and then back at Ermengarde, and then they all made different faces: Sirius raised an eyebrow, James ran a hand through his hair, Peter looked as though he were working out a particularly difficult division problem in his head, and Remus just frowned. It was like watching a comedy program on television. The sight would have been quite funny to Ermengarde if she didn't have the distinct feeling that they didn't believe a word of what she was saying.
"So...um...all right," said Remus.
"I don't know how I got here," said Ermengarde. "I just...got here. I went to sleep one night in the Gryffindor girls' dormitories in 1996, and I woke up in the Gryffindor girls' dormitories in 1976. Now, that is...and Remus, you were the first I met, and I thought that maybe I just didn't know you or something; I'm not that popular in the future. Not that there's anything wrong with me in the future...I just don't really fit in there. But anyway, then I saw the rest of you come down the staircase and I knew something was wrong...I recognized you immediately, James, because – because your son looks exactly like you."
"Son?" said James disbelievingly. "Who – what – what's his name? Who's his mother? When did this happen?"
"Not long after you leave Hogwarts," said Ermengarde. "His name is Harry."
"Harry Potter," said James. "Good name."
"His middle name is James," said Ermengarde.
"Even better name!" said James happily. "And he looks like me?"
"If I put the two of you next to each other right now, with him being fifteen as well, it would be like looking at twins. Well, except for the eyes...he has his mother's eyes."
"Who's his mum?" asked James eagerly.
"I'm not telling you that," said Ermengarde. "Because you'll just get smug."
"Fine, have it your way," muttered James, though he still looked excited about this news.
"What about me?" asked Sirius.
"You...ah...oh, I don't know if I should say," said Ermengarde anxiously.
"You told James about his bloody son!" Sirius pointed out.
"Yes, well, that's different. That's not too specific," Ermengarde argued.
"You said they look exactly alike. And the kid's name. And that he has his mother's eyes and what not...that's not specific?" Sirius said gruffly.
"Trust me on that one," said Ermengarde. "Actually, I don't think I can give any more details because I don't even know why I'm here, so I can't go messing about with the future any more than I already have."
"Can you tell me anything about my future?" Sirius whined.
"Fine," snapped Ermengarde. "You stay handsome. Good enough?"
"Absolutely," said Sirius, looking pleased.
"What about me?" asked Peter.
"I can't say I know much about your future," said Ermengarde. "I'm sorry."
Remus had not stopped frowning and he was now biting his lip, looking hard at Ermengarde.
"Remus, please say you believe me," Ermengarde pleaded.
"I do," he said quickly. "But I need a private word."
"Okay," said Ermengarde. "Want to walk around the lake or something?"
"We'll leave you to it, Moony," said James. "Come on...we'll nick something from the kitchens, right?"
They all left the classroom together and went off their separate ways. Ermengarde and Remus walked out to the lake, which was bathed in dazzling sunlight and a light haze from the heat.
"It's so beautiful out here," said Ermengarde. "I often come out here – in the future, I mean – and just sit...and sort of...be..."
"Can you tell me anything about...I mean...do I get well in the future?" asked Remus, not having taken in a word of what Ermengarde had just said.
Ermengarde did not know exactly how to respond. His eyes looked so hopeful...
"You aren't totally cured," she answered truthfully. "But I can promise you that there is hope. This thing...the Wolfsbane Potion...it'll help, believe me."
"Well," said Remus, seeming to be fighting to keep his face from falling. "That's better than nothing, isn't it? Are you still shaking?"
He seemed to want to change the subject as soon as possible. Ermengarde held out her hands, which were still quivering slightly.
"Just a little bit," she said.
"Are you scared of something?" asked Remus.
"Yes," said Ermengarde without hesitation. "I'm terrified of...of dying in the past and not ever seeing the future again."
"Here," said Remus, taking her hands and holding them for a moment, trying to stop them shaking. "Take a deep breath and try to calm down."
For the next few minutes, neither of them spoke. Then Remus broke the silence, suddenly grinning.
"I've never heard you talk so fast as you did back in the pub," he said.
"It's the potion!" Ermengarde said defensively.
"And you cursed."
"I did not!"
"You said 'bloody'."
"Well, that's not as bad as it could have been."
"I suppose not," said Remus, the grin growing wider.
Remus released her hands and patted her on the shoulder. Ermengarde took another deep breath.
"Feeling any better?" Remus asked.
"A bit," said Ermengarde.
"Now tell me, why do you think you'd die in this time period?" asked Remus.
"Why wouldn't I think so? Clearly, someone doesn't want me around...someone wants to attack me in the middle of the night and send me threatening – maybe – notes...and someone wants to stand outside my window dressed as a Death Eater!"
"What's a Death Eater?" Remus asked.
Ermengarde didn't know how to respond at first, so she sat down on the grass, Remus next to her, and she told the story of Voldemort's rise to power (leaving out any part that directly involved any of the Marauders, including herself). When she had finished, Remus's mouth was slightly open and he looked petrified.
"And you think one of these...Death Eater things...you think they're coming after you?" he asked.
"Yes, I do. All the signs point to it," she said. "Even that note thing...even if it was a warning...the Death Eaters aren't fans of Muggle- borns. What if a Death Eater wrote it to tell me to get out of here, to get out of 1976?"
"But how would they know that you're here in the first place?" asked Remus.
"That's what I'd like to know," said Ermengarde. "But the question that's bothering me more is why they're coming after me...in the first place."
Neither of them could speak. Ermengarde felt a lump rising in her throat, one of pure terror. Tears welled up in her eyes and she wiped them away edgily, not wanting Remus to see her crying.
"Shh," he said suddenly, scooting closer to her and nudging her. "Hey...do you honestly think we'd allow anything bad to happen to you? As if! We're here to take care of you, Snow Wing."
"Snow Wing?" asked Ermengarde in a quavering voice.
"Yeah," said Remus. "I've just thought of it. Since you turn into a snowy owl, I thought it was only fitting. It's...it's pretty."
"Pretty is fitting?" Ermengarde asked skeptically.
"What, you don't think you're pretty?" Remus asked, sounding surprised.
"No...why, am I?"
"Of course you are! Didn't you hear Madam O'Leary earlier?"
"I – I did, but I thought she was just being nice," said Ermengarde.
"You are beautiful," said Remus firmly. "Don't ever think otherwise, d'you hear me? I don't know why, but you seem to have a lack of confidence about yourself that you really shouldn't have."
"I just...no one's ever complimented me like that before," said Ermengarde.
"Why not? Do you live around a lot of blind people?" Remus joked, and Ermengarde managed a little giggle.
"No...just five brothers, six sisters, a mother, a father, and my twenty-two cousins who live within two blocks of me," said Ermengarde. "Of course, a lot of them aren't born yet..."
"So, what, you don't get a lot of attention?" asked Remus.
"None at all," said Ermengarde. "Well, no, I do get some, but it's usually scolding or asking me to do a chore or something. I'm not really noticed at home at all...and since I come here to school, or at least I do in the future...well, I am now as well, but anyway, since I'm not at home for school and such, I'm forgotten unless I write regularly. My family doesn't write back very often, though. Normally just around holidays. I usually stay at Hogwarts for them.
"My mum and dad were really pleased when I got into Hogwarts," continued Ermengarde. "But sometimes I think they were mostly just excited not to have another mouth to feed. They work so hard to pay for everything that I'm just an extra fee to them, a burden, you know? I've always tried so hard to make them proud, but I've just never fit in, I've never been good enough..."
All the emotions that Ermengarde had been keeping locked up inside herself for her entire life were spilling out of her mouth as tears spilled down her cheeks. Remus looked as though he didn't know exactly what to do. He hesitated, then put a comforting arm around Ermengarde, who was not used to contact like this and wasn't really sure how to handle it, so she just sort of stayed stationary and cried silently for a time. Remus then produced and handkerchief and handed it to her and she wiped her cheeks and eyes.
"Are you going to be all right?" he asked kindly.
"I think so," said Ermengarde, sniffling.
Remus patted her on the back a bit and gave her a kind smile. Ermengarde smiled back, then took a few shuddering breaths and allowed Remus to help her stand up again. As they walked back to the castle, Remus's arm around her as though he were trying to shield her from the world, Ermengarde felt as though she had never been more comfortable around another person and felt warmed inside from the safe feeling of having a true friend.
That day was a Hogsmeade day. Ermengarde was pale and puffy-eyed from no sleep and was having trouble keeping up with the boys' conversations. It wasn't until they reached the Three Broomsticks pub that Ermengarde could register where exactly they were.
"Come on, then, Ermengarde," said Remus, holding the door for her. "You look like you could do with a bit of a rest."
Ermengarde allowed herself to be ushered to a table by Remus and immediately put her head on her arm. She felt a hand on her back.
"Oh, dear. What's the matter, darling?"
It was a woman speaking, and Ermengarde jumped, not knowing who on Earth it could be. The woman was short and plump with a round-featured face, very motherly and very sweet.
"I, uh..." said Ermengarde, but she trailed off and glanced at the boys for an introduction, her old shyness suddenly bubbling up to the surface again.
"Oh, this is Madam O'Leary. She runs the pub," said James. "Madam O'Leary, this is Ermengarde Switoviak. She's the new bird at Hogwarts."
"Lovely, lovely," said Madam O'Leary. "Now then, what's ailing you, darling? Bit of a rough time getting over O.W.L. exams, was it? Nasty things, those were...I got eleven, mind you!"
"Not bad," said Sirius, obviously impressed.
"I'm just...I'm tired," said Ermengarde lamely.
"Such a shame, too...beautiful girl, y'are! But I take it she's a studious one?" Madam O'Leary asked the others, who nodded. "Nothing wrong with being clever, mind you, but when you take to staying up into the wee small hours of the morning making sure you get your homework done...well, it takes a toll on the body, it does! I suppose it'll be the usual, will it, boys? Butterbeers? And what'll it be for the lady?"
Ermengarde's mind was still trying to process her being called "beautiful". It was a new experience for her and she felt her face burn. Madam O'Leary took Ermengarde's face in her hands and made a tutting noise.
"I suppose you'll need something to wake yourself up a bit, won't you, dear?" she said warmly.
"Yes, please," said Ermengarde gratefully.
"I've got just the thing," said Madam O'Leary with a wink, and she was off.
"Now then, are you going to tell us why you got such a fright from that...whoever earlier?" asked Sirius quietly, leaning across the table towards Ermengarde.
"Well, first of all, you can't Apparate within the Hogwarts grounds," said Ermengarde. "That's a start. Second of all, I want to know what he was playing at, looking up at my window like that. Third of all...um...I've forgotten."
"You need sleep, Swi," said James. "You can't keep staying up all night. You know that. It's terrible for you."
"She was scared, Prongs," said Remus. "And honestly, can you blame her?"
"No," said James. "I guess not. It's strange, isn't it?"
"He looked like...well, he looked like this thing...that I know about...that none of you will know about...yet. But you will someday. You especially," said Ermengarde blearily, pointing at James. "Most unfortunately. And you'll know far too much about them as well, Sirius. And Remus...well, don't get too attached to anyone just yet. And Peter...you'll bloody know them as well."
A long silence followed her rambling. The Marauders stared at her in utter amazement. As soon as she realized what had just come out of her mouth, Ermengarde began to panic. There was no way they could have actually understood any of that, was there? Fortunately, Madam O'Leary brought over their drinks at that exact moment. She handed each of the boys a butterbeer and put down a mug of what looked like coffee in front of Ermengarde.
"Drink that right up now, lass," she said. "It'll do you good."
Ermengarde cautiously took a sip while Madam O'Leary watched. It tasted like a rich, chocolaty coffee – but Ermengarde suddenly choked as a spicy sensation attacked her tonsils. Remus and Sirius clapped her on the back.
"What – what is this?" Ermengarde sputtered.
"I put a dash of Pepperup Potion in there," said Madam O'Leary. "It'll do you a world of good, now drink up!"
"All right...thank you," said Ermengarde.
Madam O'Leary bustled off. Now that Ermengarde knew what to expect with the coffee drink, it actually wasn't bad. The initial shock of the Pepperup Potion had worn off and Ermengarde found herself becoming more and more awake with each sip.
"This is quite good," she commented. "She could sell this as a drink on its own...it really warms you up. Of course, today there's no need for warmth...but in the winter..."
"So, er, what were you babbling about earlier? The...person-thing...you said it looked like something you knew about," said Remus softly.
"This...well, this isn't something I can discuss where others can hear us," said Ermengarde. "I don't actually even know if I should discuss it in the first place...particularly with you four."
"Why not? We're supposed to be your friends, aren't we?" asked James indignantly.
"Of course you're my friends," said Ermengarde impatiently. "It's just that this is very complicated and all very mixed up and I'm not even entirely sure why I'm here in the first place because I never studied at Beauxbatons in the first place. For heaven's sake, I don't even speak French in the first place, so how could I? Well, I mean, I know the odd word or two...bonjour, parlez-vous francais, and au revoir and whatnot, but certainly not enough to have studied in France! And I've always known that Remus was a werewolf so I didn't even have to venture a guess about that so you could have told me about that in the first place. And I really shouldn't tell you anything else because if I do, it could totally alter the future and ruin a lot of people's lives so I really should just stop talking all together and I shouldn't have said anything in the first place. Wow, but this Pepperup Potion has quite a kick to it!"
Another very long silence followed these words, which were all said very quickly and in a very high-pitched tone. Remus put a hand on Ermengarde's forehead.
"Are you feeling okay, Ermengarde?" he asked concernedly.
"I'm fine, but I shouldn't have said anything in the first place."
"Why does she keep saying 'first place'?" Sirius muttered to James.
"So...so if you're not from France, where are you from?" asked Peter.
"Here," said Ermengarde.
"Here as in Britain?" asked Sirius.
"Here as in Hogwarts," said Ermengarde. "I've never even been to France."
"But if you've been here all along, how is it that we didn't know you before?" asked Remus.
"Because you wouldn't know me now," said Ermengarde. "I'm...I can't say."
"Then let's go somewhere you can say," said Remus. "And no more of this coffee stuff!"
Remus took her mug away and Sirius summoned Madam O'Leary.
"Thanks so much, Madam O'Leary, but we've really got to be going now," he said. "How much do we owe you?"
"Oh, don't worry about it, darling! Heaven knows you four make me laugh, that's payment enough! Just be sure to visit me this summer, won't you? And do let me know what you get on your exams. And Ermengarde, dear, it was nice to meet you. Now, you make sure these boys behave themselves, you hear? If they get fresh, you let me know!"
Madam O'Leary winked and strode off. The Marauders left quickly, Ermengarde's heart racing and her hands shaking violently from the rush of energy the drink had given her. Remus noticed her trembling.
"Just take deep breaths," he muttered. "It'll all be okay."
"I can't believe this," she kept saying over and over. "I've ruined everything. Everything."
"You haven't ruined anything," said Remus. "Calm down. We'll sort this out."
They headed back to Hogwarts and went straight to an empty classroom. Ermengarde sat down on a desk and started jiggling her foot, trying to think of how to explain what had happened to her when she wasn't even entirely sure what had happened to her.
"Okay," she said finally. "Here's the thing. I'm...I'm not from this time."
"All right..." said Sirius slowly, as though speaking to someone who was very slow. "You're from...when, then?"
"Twenty years into the future," said Ermengarde simply.
The boys looked at each other and then back at Ermengarde, and then they all made different faces: Sirius raised an eyebrow, James ran a hand through his hair, Peter looked as though he were working out a particularly difficult division problem in his head, and Remus just frowned. It was like watching a comedy program on television. The sight would have been quite funny to Ermengarde if she didn't have the distinct feeling that they didn't believe a word of what she was saying.
"So...um...all right," said Remus.
"I don't know how I got here," said Ermengarde. "I just...got here. I went to sleep one night in the Gryffindor girls' dormitories in 1996, and I woke up in the Gryffindor girls' dormitories in 1976. Now, that is...and Remus, you were the first I met, and I thought that maybe I just didn't know you or something; I'm not that popular in the future. Not that there's anything wrong with me in the future...I just don't really fit in there. But anyway, then I saw the rest of you come down the staircase and I knew something was wrong...I recognized you immediately, James, because – because your son looks exactly like you."
"Son?" said James disbelievingly. "Who – what – what's his name? Who's his mother? When did this happen?"
"Not long after you leave Hogwarts," said Ermengarde. "His name is Harry."
"Harry Potter," said James. "Good name."
"His middle name is James," said Ermengarde.
"Even better name!" said James happily. "And he looks like me?"
"If I put the two of you next to each other right now, with him being fifteen as well, it would be like looking at twins. Well, except for the eyes...he has his mother's eyes."
"Who's his mum?" asked James eagerly.
"I'm not telling you that," said Ermengarde. "Because you'll just get smug."
"Fine, have it your way," muttered James, though he still looked excited about this news.
"What about me?" asked Sirius.
"You...ah...oh, I don't know if I should say," said Ermengarde anxiously.
"You told James about his bloody son!" Sirius pointed out.
"Yes, well, that's different. That's not too specific," Ermengarde argued.
"You said they look exactly alike. And the kid's name. And that he has his mother's eyes and what not...that's not specific?" Sirius said gruffly.
"Trust me on that one," said Ermengarde. "Actually, I don't think I can give any more details because I don't even know why I'm here, so I can't go messing about with the future any more than I already have."
"Can you tell me anything about my future?" Sirius whined.
"Fine," snapped Ermengarde. "You stay handsome. Good enough?"
"Absolutely," said Sirius, looking pleased.
"What about me?" asked Peter.
"I can't say I know much about your future," said Ermengarde. "I'm sorry."
Remus had not stopped frowning and he was now biting his lip, looking hard at Ermengarde.
"Remus, please say you believe me," Ermengarde pleaded.
"I do," he said quickly. "But I need a private word."
"Okay," said Ermengarde. "Want to walk around the lake or something?"
"We'll leave you to it, Moony," said James. "Come on...we'll nick something from the kitchens, right?"
They all left the classroom together and went off their separate ways. Ermengarde and Remus walked out to the lake, which was bathed in dazzling sunlight and a light haze from the heat.
"It's so beautiful out here," said Ermengarde. "I often come out here – in the future, I mean – and just sit...and sort of...be..."
"Can you tell me anything about...I mean...do I get well in the future?" asked Remus, not having taken in a word of what Ermengarde had just said.
Ermengarde did not know exactly how to respond. His eyes looked so hopeful...
"You aren't totally cured," she answered truthfully. "But I can promise you that there is hope. This thing...the Wolfsbane Potion...it'll help, believe me."
"Well," said Remus, seeming to be fighting to keep his face from falling. "That's better than nothing, isn't it? Are you still shaking?"
He seemed to want to change the subject as soon as possible. Ermengarde held out her hands, which were still quivering slightly.
"Just a little bit," she said.
"Are you scared of something?" asked Remus.
"Yes," said Ermengarde without hesitation. "I'm terrified of...of dying in the past and not ever seeing the future again."
"Here," said Remus, taking her hands and holding them for a moment, trying to stop them shaking. "Take a deep breath and try to calm down."
For the next few minutes, neither of them spoke. Then Remus broke the silence, suddenly grinning.
"I've never heard you talk so fast as you did back in the pub," he said.
"It's the potion!" Ermengarde said defensively.
"And you cursed."
"I did not!"
"You said 'bloody'."
"Well, that's not as bad as it could have been."
"I suppose not," said Remus, the grin growing wider.
Remus released her hands and patted her on the shoulder. Ermengarde took another deep breath.
"Feeling any better?" Remus asked.
"A bit," said Ermengarde.
"Now tell me, why do you think you'd die in this time period?" asked Remus.
"Why wouldn't I think so? Clearly, someone doesn't want me around...someone wants to attack me in the middle of the night and send me threatening – maybe – notes...and someone wants to stand outside my window dressed as a Death Eater!"
"What's a Death Eater?" Remus asked.
Ermengarde didn't know how to respond at first, so she sat down on the grass, Remus next to her, and she told the story of Voldemort's rise to power (leaving out any part that directly involved any of the Marauders, including herself). When she had finished, Remus's mouth was slightly open and he looked petrified.
"And you think one of these...Death Eater things...you think they're coming after you?" he asked.
"Yes, I do. All the signs point to it," she said. "Even that note thing...even if it was a warning...the Death Eaters aren't fans of Muggle- borns. What if a Death Eater wrote it to tell me to get out of here, to get out of 1976?"
"But how would they know that you're here in the first place?" asked Remus.
"That's what I'd like to know," said Ermengarde. "But the question that's bothering me more is why they're coming after me...in the first place."
Neither of them could speak. Ermengarde felt a lump rising in her throat, one of pure terror. Tears welled up in her eyes and she wiped them away edgily, not wanting Remus to see her crying.
"Shh," he said suddenly, scooting closer to her and nudging her. "Hey...do you honestly think we'd allow anything bad to happen to you? As if! We're here to take care of you, Snow Wing."
"Snow Wing?" asked Ermengarde in a quavering voice.
"Yeah," said Remus. "I've just thought of it. Since you turn into a snowy owl, I thought it was only fitting. It's...it's pretty."
"Pretty is fitting?" Ermengarde asked skeptically.
"What, you don't think you're pretty?" Remus asked, sounding surprised.
"No...why, am I?"
"Of course you are! Didn't you hear Madam O'Leary earlier?"
"I – I did, but I thought she was just being nice," said Ermengarde.
"You are beautiful," said Remus firmly. "Don't ever think otherwise, d'you hear me? I don't know why, but you seem to have a lack of confidence about yourself that you really shouldn't have."
"I just...no one's ever complimented me like that before," said Ermengarde.
"Why not? Do you live around a lot of blind people?" Remus joked, and Ermengarde managed a little giggle.
"No...just five brothers, six sisters, a mother, a father, and my twenty-two cousins who live within two blocks of me," said Ermengarde. "Of course, a lot of them aren't born yet..."
"So, what, you don't get a lot of attention?" asked Remus.
"None at all," said Ermengarde. "Well, no, I do get some, but it's usually scolding or asking me to do a chore or something. I'm not really noticed at home at all...and since I come here to school, or at least I do in the future...well, I am now as well, but anyway, since I'm not at home for school and such, I'm forgotten unless I write regularly. My family doesn't write back very often, though. Normally just around holidays. I usually stay at Hogwarts for them.
"My mum and dad were really pleased when I got into Hogwarts," continued Ermengarde. "But sometimes I think they were mostly just excited not to have another mouth to feed. They work so hard to pay for everything that I'm just an extra fee to them, a burden, you know? I've always tried so hard to make them proud, but I've just never fit in, I've never been good enough..."
All the emotions that Ermengarde had been keeping locked up inside herself for her entire life were spilling out of her mouth as tears spilled down her cheeks. Remus looked as though he didn't know exactly what to do. He hesitated, then put a comforting arm around Ermengarde, who was not used to contact like this and wasn't really sure how to handle it, so she just sort of stayed stationary and cried silently for a time. Remus then produced and handkerchief and handed it to her and she wiped her cheeks and eyes.
"Are you going to be all right?" he asked kindly.
"I think so," said Ermengarde, sniffling.
Remus patted her on the back a bit and gave her a kind smile. Ermengarde smiled back, then took a few shuddering breaths and allowed Remus to help her stand up again. As they walked back to the castle, Remus's arm around her as though he were trying to shield her from the world, Ermengarde felt as though she had never been more comfortable around another person and felt warmed inside from the safe feeling of having a true friend.