Disclaimer: In addition to not owning Harry Potter, I also do not own Lola Rennt. Or, as I believe it's called in English, Run Lola Run.

A/N: If you're looking for something that makes sense, this is not for you. This piece of fiction does not know the meaning of the word sense. In fact, it would not recognise sense if, in the words of Ron, it danced naked in front of it wearing Dobby's tea-cozy.

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#9 - dash

Running Man

- in which we make a crossover into the surreal -

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Ron was just about to leave the dormitory for his first lesson of the day when the owl appeared at the window. Frowning, he went to let it in, annoyed since he was supposed to be at the other side of the castle in two minutes and this would delay him even further.

He took the note the owl was carrying, and it flapped it wings a little before flying back out.

The note was from Pansy.

Ron,

I think you must have taken my Ancient Runes essay from the library yesterday, you stupid prat. Why weren't you at breakfast? I was going to get it from you there. I need it for class now. I'll be waiting for you by the Ancient Runes classroom, run and bring it to me!

Pansy

Ron stared at the note for a while, and then shrugged. The universe seemed to be conspiring to make him late for DADA today anyway, what with his managing to oversleep and miss breakfast and all, so he might as well bring her the essay and not go to class at all anyway. Rummaging through his bag and the books and parchments he had been using during their study date in the library yesterday, he found the essay in question and headed off to meet her.

Her class was starting in a few minutes, so Ron decided it would probably be best to be there as soon as possible, and broke into a light run.

Unfortunately, this meant that while hurrying down a case of stairs, he did not notice Mrs Norris on one of the steps, and managed to trip over her, falling down the rest of the stairs. He kept his eyes closed as he finally reached the end of the staircase and landed very ungracefully on his back on th floor.

Taking a deep breath, he concentrated on his limbs, trying to find out whether he was hurt anywhere.

No, scratch that, Ron decided after a few seconds of that. It would be a better idea to try figuring out if there was any part of his body that wasn't hurting instead.

He slowly opened his eyes and lifted his head a little. The world seemed a bit blurry, but he could make out someone leaning over him. He blinked, and the figure became more clear.

And also made him almost wish that it hadn't. It was Filch, who was staring at him with a very ominous look in his eyes.

"You!" The caretaker practically hissed at him. "You tried to kill my cat! Just you wait until I'm through with you! You'll have detentions for the rest of your time here, and then you'll have to come back for them even after that!"

Ron groaned and let his head fall back to the ground.

Everything went black.

-

He was standing by the window in his dormitory, a note in his hand.

Ron,

I think you must have taken my Ancient Runes essay from the library yesterday, you stupid prat,

it began.

Ron stared down at the note.

"What the..." he began, not understanding what was going on here. Hadn't he just been through this? Did he hit his head harder than he had thought and lost some of his memory or something?

He turned back from the window, frowning at the note, but then gave a yelp and dropped it as he noticed he was not alone in the room.

A woman with flaming red hair and an odd smile on her face was standing by his bed, holding out a parchment that looked very much like the one he was sure he had tried to deliver to Pansy a moment ago.

"If you run, you can still make it," she said, her voice thick with an unfamiliar accent.

"What? I mean, who? What?"

She shook her head at him. "You got your time back. Now run," she told him.

"My... time back? What?" He turned to look at the clock beside his bed, and saw that it was still two minutes before his class started.

"No time to explain, if you want to make it in time. Now go. Run."

Too dazed to think of anything else to do, Ron took the parchment from her outstretched hands and ran out of the dormitory and the Gryffindor tower.

This time, he looked carefully in front of him as he ran down the stairs, and so managed to avoid Mrs Norris, who was still in the exact same spot. He grinned apologetically at Filch as he passed him at the bottom of the stairs, and the caretaker glared suspiciously after him as he dashed away.

He'd got his time back, the woman had said. Mrs Norris had been in the exact same place. The clock by his bed had shown the same time as before.

Huh.

His musings were interrupted by a voice just beside him.

"Oooh, what's this?"

The parchment was snatched out of his hand, and Ron looked up to see Peeves floating upward with the parchment in hand, pausing just under the ceiling to look at it.

"Hey! Give that back!"

Ron felt his confusion melt away, making way for anger instead.

Peeves grinned maliciously. "Here, let me think about it. Umm... No!"

Ron drew his wand and pointed it at the poltergeist. "Give it back now!"

"Oh, very well then," Peeves sighed, and floated down towards him. He stopped just in front of Ron and held out the parchment. And then, before Ron could do anything, ripped it into little pieces that he threw around the hallway.

"Not!" Peeves declared gleefully, and floated off, cackling madly.

Ron groaned, and hit his forehead against the wall.

The world went black.

-

He was standing by the window in his dormitory, a note in his hand.

Ron,

I think you must have taken my Ancient Runes essay from the library yesterday..."

He turned, and there was the woman again, he same piece of parchment in her hands. The time was two minutes before his class.

"Look, what's going on?" This time, he was almost prepared.

"Run," she said, handing him the parchment.

"Is this for real? Seriously. Is this really happening?"

She smiled. "If you don't run, you won't make it in time."

So Ron sighed, and took off again.

Run, stairs, avoid Mrs Norris, Filch, run, stop for long enough to let Peeves pass, run.

He wasn't far from the classroom now, and was just thinking that maybe, just maybe, he'd actually make it this time, when he managed to run into something again, and fell backwards with the something falling onto him.

Or, as it turned out when he opened his eyes again, someone. Apparently, he'd ran into Susan Bones.

They were lying there face to face, both staring at each other looking rather shocked.

"Err... Hi, Ron," she finally managed.

"Hi."

""I think I ran into you."

"Seems that way."

"It does, doesn't it? Sorry about that."

"It was probably my fault. I wasn't looking where I was going."

"Me neither."

"You'd think I would have learned by now."

"Right. Err. You would? Why is that?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

They were interrupted by a cough, and turned from where they were still lying to see Pansy looking down at them.

"So sorry to interrupt," she said icily. "I came to get my essay, but I see you're too preoccupied to worry about that. I'll just go to class without it then. Sorry to bother you and..." she snorted, "the Hufflepuff."

She turned and walked away swiftly.

Ron and Susan disentangled themselves and sat up.

"That's..."

"Yeah." Ron sighed.

"Should I go explain..."

"Nah, I'll do it later. Are you okay?"

"I think so. You?"

"I guess."

"Well... See you, then."

Ron nodded and she left. He then closed his eyes and hit his head against the wall again.

He was vaguely wondering whether he'd have a bruise there before this day was over when the world went black again.

-

He was standing by the window in his dormitory, a note in his hand.

This time, he didn't even bother to read it.

Turning, the woman was there again, the now-familiar parchment held out to him.

"Run," she yold him.

Ron made to take the parchment from her, but then paused.

"You know what? I don't think I will," he decided, and turned around and leaned out the window.

"Hey! Owl!" he yelled. "Come back here, would you?"

The owl had not gone too far, and turned to fly up and down a little, looking for all the world like it was giving him an appraising look.

"Please?" Ron added.

The owl seemed to hesitate for a while, and then returned.

Ron grabbed a quill and a piece of parchment and scribbled down a few words, then tied both the letter and the essay to the owl's leg.

"Bring those to Pansy, ok?"

The owl hooted, and flew off.

Ron turned to the woman.

"See? Much better than running," he told her.

-

Pansy,

Here's your essay. Sending it by owl, since the universe doesn't like it when I run. It had better be really good and really important for all the trouble it's caused me!

Ron

Pansy re-read the letter a couple of times, then shook her head and decided that her boyfriend was a Gryffindor and a Weasley, and thus by nature completely mad, and there was nothing you could do about it, so she'd better just accept it.

And it was not like she was complaining later in the day when he loudly cheered finally! and then pulled her into an enthusiastic kiss when she told him she'd recieved his delivery just in time, thankyouverymuch.