Chapter Twelve: Who You Want to Belong To
Haley and Lucas did go out the next night. And the night after that, and two nights after that. By the end of the month they had gone out many times, but were no closer to either love or sex.
"So what are we doing this Saturday?" asked Haley, looking up at Lucas at end of their most recent date.
"I was going to ask you about that. My parents are coming back into town. And we were planning on meeting them at the Plaza for dinner," said Lucas.
"We? As in Nathan and Brooke? As in my boss and his wife?" asked Haley in slight panic.
"Well yeah. But Nathan told me you quit, that he didn't fire you," said Lucas.
"Nathan… Nathan told you that. Did he tell you anything else?" asked Haley.
"Well no. But you were his secretary. You aren't anymore. What else is there to tell?" wondered Lucas.
"Nothing. Nothing, of course," she said. Leaning down, he gently kissed her.
His kiss left Haley unfulfilled. Technically, it was a good kiss. A gentle brush that descended sweetly in to more. But it felt like nothing. It felt like she deserved to get caught.
The two of them waited silently while the elevator went up the floors. Before they'd dated, they'd never been able to shut up around each other. Now it was as if so many doors were closed to them.
"I got something for you," he said eventually.
"Thanks," she said, smiling at him.
"It's a necklace," he said.
"Really smooth. You're supposed to put it on me, and let your fingers brush up against my throat to give me shivers," she said. He laughed.
"Okay. Turn around."
Haley lifted her blonde hair out of the way as Lucas got the necklace out of the box it had came in. He was surprised when he came across another necklace, already on her neck.
"Mind if I take this one off?" he asked. Instinctively she felt her throat for the small heart that always rested there.
"Not at all. It doesn't matter," she said softly. He unclasped the necklace and placed it carelessly on the coffee table before fastening on his own.
Haley smiled when she saw it-her own name on a gold chain. It was younger, more casual than Nathan's gift, but it worked for her.
"Thank you. It's perfect," she said.
After he left, Haley picked the discarded necklace up from the coffee table. She felt as though she'd been branded, first by Nathan and then by his brother.
She felt that way because she had been. She'd belonged to Nathan, in a way she could never belong to Nathan. Partially because of the lack of love between them, but also partially because both Brooke and Nathan stood in their way. Would always stand in their way.
Haley knew that didn't Lucas didn't love her, that he loved someone else. She didn't know who she loved, she didn't particularly want to know. It was a good thing that she didn't know-knowing that the baby that had taken the man she loved away from her wasn't in fact his baby would have made everything harder for her.
In a show of rebellion, she wore Lucas' necklace to the dinner with his parents.
"Mom, Dad, this is my good friend Haley James," said Lucas. Dan and Karen Scott looked up.
"Haley, it's nice to meet you. I love your dress," said Karen quickly. Dan took a longer time to respond, apparently evaluating his son's date.
"Haley. Where did you go to school?" he asked.
"Um, NYU," she said nervously. Dan nodded emotionlessly before smiling.
"Well it's very nice to meet you. You sit right here," he said. Smiling at Lucas, she sat next to his father while the rest of them waited for Nathan and Brooke.
Surprisingly, Dan Scott took a shine to Haley James. For the first time in years, he heartily approved of one of his son's girlfriends.
"Nate!" called Dan, when he saw his elder son approach, his wife on his arm. Karen and Lucas smiled at the later arrivals. Haley stared at her water glass and prayed for poise.
"Mr. Scott, Mrs. Scott, hello," she said, falsely cheerfully. Unable to help himself, Nathan's eyes swept from her face down to the cleavage that her dress hinted at.
"Haley, please call me Brooke," requested Brooke. It surprised the whole table for a moment-Brooke had never requested such a thing. Everyone looked at Nathan to issue a similar request, but he didn't speak. He couldn't bring himself to speak to her.
When Haley noticed Nathan's eyes on her again, she timidly fingered the necklace she wore. It had always been their signal. She hoped he'd remember.
"Uh, I have to go the bathroom," he said immediately.
"Actually, I do to. I guess you know where they are?" said Haley, rising gracefully. Together the two of them walked off silently.
Haley was surprised when Nathan directed her toward a wall near the bathroom and put a fist on either side of her, blocking her in.
"What are you doing with him?" asked Nathan.
"Come on, you left me. I can't stand around waiting for you," she said.
"Do you love him?" Haley looked up into his eyes.
"You know the answer to that. Nathan."
"I don't want…" he began.
"Yeah, well, I don't want to be with him either. He doesn't do anything for me. He works far better as my best friend. But you left me in something of a lurch," she burst out. When he leaned down to kiss her, she turned her head away.
"Don't you dare. You abandoned me. You lied to me. Brooke deserves better," said Haley.
"I…" he tried to say.
"Don't. Don't you dare. I can't handle that," she said. Turning his face gently with her hand, she softly kissed his freshly shaven cheek.
Haley half expected him to turn her face and claim her lips, but he didn't try to. Together they walked stiffly back to the dining room, talking as normally as they possibly could.
Haley forced herself to listen and look congratulatory as Brooke announced her happy news. She didn't notice Lucas looking pensive, and Nathan staring at her again.
Lucas and Haley left the Plaza separately, each lost in their own thoughts.
"How was the evening?" asked Peyton softly, emerging out of the shadows with Natalya in her arms.
"Terrible. I think Nathan tried to tell me he loved me," she said. She reached out for her daughter.
"You…?"
"Stopped him. It's so hard. And I'm not remotely in love with Lucas. It's just all so wrong. But his father liked me," she said.
"Dan? I thought you said he didn't like anybody?" said Peyton.
"Guess not. Karen's nice though," said Haley.
"Meeting his parents, wearing his necklace… getting serious?" asked Peyton, jealousy tinged in her voice.
"Not remotely. We haven't done it. I don't even want to. I have a kid, for God's sake," said Haley.
"And you're in love with his brother. Always makes it more difficult," said Peyton.
"That too," agreed Haley.