Chapter 4: The Date

Brian sat next to Justin on his bed in silence.

"Don't you want to work on the posters?" Justin got up and walked out onto the balcony.

"No." Brian got quiet again until Justin blurted out, "Where we you last night?"

"I told you, I was sick." Justin turned around again. "I—I don't think this is going to work."

"What, why not?"

"Because," he said, getting up to him. "Everyone knows. Deb saw us and she's making me sleep with Michael tonight. It just won't work." He started for the door, but Justin stopped him.

"No, no, no, I won't get jealous, I promise, I won't. I love you so much." He kissed him with all his might. "Please baby. I'll—I'll—I'll draw you a picture and you can copy it or—sketch it and—and whenever we see it, it'll—it'll mean that we love each other." He rushed to his drawing board and started to draw a broken heart. "See, I'll draw this half and you draw the other half, and when we see each other we'll put the halves together and it'll be a whole." Brian smiled and took the tiny piece of paper. "See, now you have my heart."

Michael's place wasn't as glamorous as Debbie had made it up to be. Brian stepped in and was met by an eager Michael.

"Hey."

"Long time, no see." Brian nodded.

"So, what do you want to do?"

"I have a pretty good idea," he said, caressing Brian's arm.

"Right now? But I just got here." He went over to the window and looked out of it. "Did you ever look out at the stars? They seem so fragile, you know?" Michael nodded unenthusiastically. Brian looked down and saw Justin walking by holding the heart paper. Brian fingered the piece inside his pocket and hoped that Justin knew he had it. Without warning, Michael came up behind him.

"Oh, I get it," he hissed.

"No, it's not like that. I just saw him and…" Michael, taking advantage of Brian being weak, grabbed him by the arm and threw him to the ground.

"You're just using me for amusement!" He dragged him to the bed and ripped his jeans open.

"Michael, stop!" he pleaded. "You don't know what you're doing!"

"Oh, I know exactly what I'm doing. I'm getting what I want…you." Brian tried to struggle, but couldn't break free of Michael. Suddenly, a shadow appeared over Michael and him with a baseball bat to knock him out. The figure was Brian's bodyguard, Ben.

"Take—Take me to Justin."

Justin sat by his opened window and stared at the white, glowing moon. He thought about Brian and prayed that they could make it work. The door burst open and he ran into Justin's arms.

"What happened?"

"I couldn't do it," he sobbed into Justin's shoulder. "I don't want to pretend anymore. I don't want to pretend that I don't love you."

"Shhh…you don't have to. Ben, take Brian back to his loft and help him get his things together. You can't be seen, understand?"

"Yes, sir." Brian looked up at Justin.

"What're we doing?"

"We're going to leave and never come back, okay? You'll never have to do this again, I promise."

Michael paced back and forth through his living room while people were making calls trying to figure out where Brian was.

"No luck, sir," David said to him.

"That's it. Tell my mom that if Brian doesn't come to me after the party tomorrow…I'll have Justin killed."

Brian rushed to pack all of his necessary things to go off with Justin.

"Don't go," Debbie whispered in the corner.

He was startled, but said, "I'm not doing this anymore, Deb. Justin loves me, okay? He loves me! No one's ever loved me before, so why do you want to take it away from me!" She stood silent. "We're going away from this town, away from you, away from Babylon! And there is nothing you can do to stop me!" He grabbed his bags and headed for the door.

"Brian, you're dying." He stopped dead in his tracks.

"Nice try, Debbie, but…" He saw hear face and there were tears in her eyes. "No…I'm not…I'm…dying." Brian dropped his bags and sunk to the floor. "Justin won't care…as long as we're together."

"You can't go with him. Michael said that if you do he'll kill him."

"I can't leave him, Deb. I love him."

"Then if you truly love him you'll hurt him…hurt him to save him."

When Debbie had gone, Brian stepped out onto his balcony and cried harder than he ever had before.

"I'm dying," he whispered to himself. The stars were as bright as ever and the glow was almost unbearable. It was warm out for a December night in Pittsburgh, but there was still a slight breeze. He thought about how he's never going to see another sunset, sunrise, hear music, watch television, but most of all, how's he's never going to see Justin's smile. Never going to hear his voice or feel his touch. "I don't want to die!" he cried out to the sky. "God, please don't let me die!" After an hour of crying he finally got the courage to go and see Justin.

"Where've you been?" Brian couldn't bare to look at his face.

"I'm—I'm staying with Michael." Justin's eyes widened.

"What! Why!"

"Because, I've—I've realized that our love—isn't real. It was just a crush." Brian's heart was breaking as he was saying those words. Justin shook his head.

"No, no you're lying. What happened?" He came up closer to him, but Brian backed away.

"I can't see you anymore. I…I…don't…love you." With that, he turned and ran out leaving Justin speechless and on the verge of tears. He turned and saw that his hand was embedded in the wall.