Picture Perfect

Summary: Ashley has always tried to be the perfect girl. Not wanting to disappoint her friends or family. However, when does the need for perfection cross the line? And what other secret is Ashley hiding that she is too afraid to tell anyone? Will the ones who love her more then anything be able to get Ashley the help she needs?

Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi or any of the Degrassi characters. or any of the songs by Evanescence.

These wounds won't seem to heal This pain is just to real There's just to much That time can not erase

Summary: Ashley has always tried to be the perfect girl. Not wanting to disappoint her friends or family. However, when does the need for perfection cross the line? And what other secret is Ashley hiding that she is too afraid to tell anyone? Will the ones who love her more then anything be able to get Ashley the help she needs?

Warning: There will be a couple character deaths in here. Also I will be investing in a Kate/Ashley and Ashley/Craig relationship in this story.

Ashley walked into her house on a Wednesday afternoon, right after school. "Mom. I'm home." Ash called out walking into the kitchen. Kate was just sitting there cup of coffee in between her hands. Ashley rose an eyebrow but said nothing. She nodded to herself and headed up to her room. Her eyes widened when she saw it had been tampered with. Laxative boxes, many empty, and a few opened. Bottles of diet pills scattered across her bed. Her eyes widened more when she saw a packed suitcase by her bed. Ashley shook her head and turned around to jet out the door, Kate lightly grabbed her arm. "Ash." She said softly. Ashley shook her head. "I can't believe you did this." Ashley spat in disbelief. Kate swallowed softly. "I had no choice. I got an anonymous call, and... I can't believe I didn't see the signs." Ashley shook her head. "There's a lot you didn't see." She said bitterly. "What?" Kate asked, having no idea what her daughter was talking about. "Nothing." Ash said. Her voice flat. Kate shook it off, and walked over to Ash's bed grabbing her bag. "I packed for you. I didn't want to risk you packing anything dangerous." Ashley bit her lip. Her eyes pained, trying hard to look angry. She was though. Angry and betrayed. "Let's go. I'm taking you to the hospital." Kate said gently. Ashley crossed her arms, and Kate led her to the car. Ash wanted to fight. Yell and scream. However, she learned a while back, that never helped. Kate swallowed knowing this was the only way she could help her daugther.

A year and a half earlier

Ashley was looking in the mirror trying on a shirt she had just brought from the mall. "Paige... Does this make me look fat?" Ash asked, pinching the little fat she did have. Paige rolled her eyes. "Oh yea hon. Huge." Ash swallowed. "Kidding." Paige said. "Hon you look great." Ash nodded uncertainly. "You sure?" She asked unconvinced. Paige sighed ann oyed. "Positive." Paige said. "Now shut up and help with with this assignment." Paige ordered. Ash nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, and taking a seat next to Paige.

A Week Later

At school Ash sat by Paige and Hazel. Her eyes had dark circles under them. She was just fiddling with her food. "You OK hon?" Paige asked. "You haven't even touched a thing. You really don't want those little gross hairs on your body do you?" She asked bluntly. Ash rolled her eyes. "I'm fine." She replied shaking her head. "I have to go anyways." She said wiping her eyes. She stood up and took her lunch tray with her, throwing it with all the other dishes and exited the cafeteria.

She sat down on a bench outside the school. her head in between her hands. "Hey." A voice said tapping her on the shoulder. Ashley jumped. "Don't do that." She snapped, looking up. It was Craig. Ash swallowed she really hadn't talked to him since the whole Manny thing. "What?" Ashley asked. "Um... You OK?" Craig asked. "I'm fine." She insisted. "Um... OK. That's good then." He said, hoping from foot to foot nervously. Ash rolled her eyes and got up. "Yea. It's peachy." She said sarcastically. Craig just stood there, having no idea what to do. Ash shook her head and walked away. Leaving Craig just standing there.

Later that night, Ash was sitting up in her room, working on an assignment for Kwan. There was a light knock on the door. "Come in." Ash said not looking up. "Hey sweetie." Kate said softly, holding a plate of food in her hand. "Hi." Ash said, concentrated on her work. "I brought you some vegeterian lasagna." She said softly. "Your favourite." Ash shook her head. "Not hungry." She said. "You sure?" Kate asked. Ash nodded. "Yea... But I'll eat later." Kate nodded, and kissed her daugther on her forehead. "Ok. Don't stay up to late. Night." She said. "Night." Ash said. "Love you." Said Kate. "You too." Ash replied. "Yea." She thought to herself. "You wouldn't love me, if you knew what was going on." Ash continued with her work, Kate smiled lightly and stood up. "Jeff will be home later." She said. "He's working late." Ash swallowed and nodded. "Ok." She said.

Later that night Ash was lying in her bed, curled up in a little ball. Jeff would be home soon, she began wiping away ears as they felldown her face, her body aching. Her bedroom door slowlyopened, making slight noise, and gently closing. "Hey." Jeff said lying in bed next to Ashley. Ashley shuddered. wrapping her arms tightly around herself. "Please." She said. "Don't." Jeff sighed smoothing her hair, this had been going on for about a month. For the first couple weeks, Ashley tried to fight to get him off, but he was always too storng. She had given up. She was to afraid to tell anyone, because she feared they would define her as a slut. Ashley squeezed her eyes shut, as Jeff continued. Praying this was all just a bad dream, but as usual she knew it wasn't.

The next day as Ash was getting ready for school. she peeled up her shirt, gazing at her hip. Jeff had carved his inital into her hip last night, to brand her as his. She shudderd, and peeled down her shirt, tears stinging her eyes. She swallowed hard,. "Suck it up." She said to herself. "Just suck it up." With that shereached for a bottle of caffiene pills and her energy drink. It was the only thing to keep her up, and not show any signs of having trouble. She grabbed her bag and headed downstairs. "Hey." Kate said as Ash walked into the kitchen. "Hey." Ash said softly. She was relieved when she heard Paige pull up. "Paige and I are going out for breakfast if that's OK." Ash said softly. Kate nodded. "It's fine sweetie." She said. "Have fun." Ash nodded and headed out the door.

After that, Ashley's diet became more severe. She went straight to laxatives, and diet pills. Limiting how much she could eat a day. Exercising constantly. Not only did she want perfection, it was the only control she had in her life. So she thought. Jeff had continued to molest her, and became very strict about her dating. Not letting her go out on weekends.

A Year and a Half Later

Ashley and Kate soon arrived at the hospital. Ash's arms crossed. "We're here." Kate said softly. Ashley shook her head. "I can't believe this." She said coldly. Kate bit her lip. "I know. I know you hate it. But right now. I don't care. All I care is that you get the help you need, and become healthy again. I can't lose you Ashley." She said. Ashley ignored Kate and stepped out of the car slamming the car door. Kate grabbed her bag, knowing with Ash's weight it'd be to heavy for her. Ashley wrapped her arms around herself, shivering slightly. Despite how warm it was outside. Kate gave her daughter a concerned look and led her into the hospital. Kate's cell phone began to ring, both her and Ashley stopped. "Hello?" She said answering the phone. Kate's face fell as the person was speaking. Ashley's father. Robert Kerwin, was killed in a car accident. "Thank you." Kate said and hung up the phone. "Who was that?" Ashley asked. "Um... No one." Kate said. She didn't feel telling Ashley right now would make things better, but only worse. She wanted to wait until the time was right. Ashley shook her head slightly and turned around heading in the building.

They got up to the front desk, waiting for assistance. "May I help you?" A woman in her mid-20's asked. "Yea. I'm here to check in my daugther. Ashley Kerwin." She said softly. She nodded and handed Kate the paper work. They went to sit back down. Ash swallowed and put her hands in her head, wanting to believe this was all a nightmare. Kate looked over, concern in her eyes. "I should've seen it sooner. I'm sorry. I should've seen the signs." She said. "What signs?" Ashley asked flatly. "All of them. The excuses for not eating. leaving early or staying late at school, or saying you were eating dinner at a friends, studying at the librart, and those random times you did eat, how you always ran to the bathroom." Kate said, her voice soft. Ashley shook her head. "There's nothing wrong with me." Kate ignored that. She knew it wasn't true, and she knew Ashley knew it wasn't true. She just wished Ashley would convince herself of that.