Disclaimer: Not mine, never has been, never will be.
A/N: This is some sort of sequel to "Promises" and I guess you do need to read that one to fully understand what is going on in this story.
Window to the soul
Grissom's POV
He spent a lot of time staring out of the window which looked out over the concrete entrance of the crime lab. Ecklie of all people had promoted him to this office. They had become allies of some sort after too many nights drinking too much alcohol in some shady cafe where they had bumped into each other a little over a year ago. It was clear they both had many demons to chase away and alcohol seemed to be the right medicine to dull the aching constantly present in his body.
They weren't friends, they didn't even talk at work, but he did get "the room with a view". His office probably was the only place in the lab which allowed you to enjoy life around the lab which itself was filled with death and decay. He was convinced they had built the lab in such a way that the outside world full of the living wouldn't interfere with the hellish ordeals taking place inside the lab.
Today it wasn't different. He was staring out of the window again when he saw her and she took his breath away. He thought travelers in the desert must feel like this when they witnessed a fata morgana. The glass walls inside the lab allowed him to follow her. It wasn't a surprise to see she was heading towards his office. There could be no mistake, she was Sara's. The confidence with which she walked to her destination was just one of the things she inherited from her mother, although her mother hadn't been as confident in life at the age she was currently at. He estimated her age at approximately 16. He had met Sara when she was 16. She had been confident at that age, but in her knowledge and in not much else. Sara's confidence had grown over the years, but it had taken a serious beating while she was working in Vegas.
Over the years he had wondered if her life had gotten better after she left.
She had told him that no matter how much you loved something, when that something made you miserable you just had to let it go. It had been the most rational thing he had heard her say in a long time. She also said she couldn't cope with her friends becoming victims, she couldn't deal with the nightmares in which she saw her friend suffocating to death haunting her when she was asleep and awake. The emotion on her face was too painful to look at, but she didn't cry like she had when she first told him about the nightmares she was having when she first came to work at the lab. He hadn't made any objections against her decision. He hadn't even told her the lab needed her, he had let her go, because he also knew that if you really loved someone you needed to do what was right for them and there was no way he could save her, fix her or openly love her.
Yes, he had wondered if she had found some kind of happiness, but he never got to find out if she had.
Ten years ago and exactly six years after she had left, he had received a phone call from Terri Miller. His first thought had been that this phone call was long overdue, but her tone of voice instantly made it clear to him something was terribly wrong. Terri had been working for the FBI and he knew Sara was working for the FBI, but he hadn't made the connection until she said her name and then his world came crashing down and till this day he hadn't been able to get it back together.
He had gone to her funeral, but he had deliberately stayed away from the service and waited to enter the small church when everybody had already left it. He had thought everybody left until he neared her casket and saw Nick Stokes standing next to it. He figured Nick and Sara had remained friends after she left. Nick had left the Las Vegas crime lab a couple of months after Sara. He had given him many of the same reasons she had and again he had let him go without trying to convince him to stay. It was comforting to know that someone who had known her, as far as you could know Sara, had cared enough to come to pay their last respects. And it was comforting to share the grief which was overwhelming him.
He had asked Nick if she had been happy. Trying to control his emotion, Nick had answered him with a slight nod. He had wanted to ask him if she had found someone to make her happy, but his attempt to ask this had faltered mid-sentence. Nick had briefly taken his eyes away from the casket, but again he nodded. He had not asked if she had children and now he realized he should have. He wasn't sure what he would have done if he had known though.
He could see her nearing his office. She wouldn't need to introduce herself as she was the mirror image of her mother, except for the dimples, which appeared when she smiled while she was standing in the doorway of his office. Her mother had stood there many times in the past and he should stop comparing them to each other as it would make things uncomfortable and awkward and he didn't want to chase her away in the same way he had chased away her mother.
He acknowledged her by looking up and taking off his glasses.
"You are Sara's daughter?" He asked
It was then he found out how wrong he had been by assuming she didn't need any introduction.
She walked up to him slowly, extending her hand.
"Abbigail Stokes." "My dad tells me you can tell me about my mother." Her words stumbled over each other and caused a painful silence between them. He wondered how much she knew about the relationship between her mother and him before he realized fully what she said.
Abbigail Stokes as in Nick Stokes.
He shifted his gaze towards the window to gather his thoughts where he saw Nick Stokes standing against his car. He could clearly see his nervousness. Sighing deeply, he turned his gaze back to her, clutching his hands together, he asked her to ask her dad to come in. Her smile broadened visibly.
It was time to stop the hurt.
FIN
