Only the Lonely

Chapter 5: Big, Red and Horny

By

The Uncanny R-Man

Disclaimer- I don't own anything, all familiar characters belong to Marvel.

Shout Outs-

Lazerwolf/Phoenix- I guess my stuff does speed through a bit, I'll try to keep it slower from now on.

Paprika90- Hmm, I guess Amanda did accept the offer a bit too quickly. Maybe she has something up her sleeve... Except, she doesn't...

Agent-G- Heh, you can bet that Meggan and Amanda are going to compare notes. Bring on the Pietro torture! Starting to see a pattern here? It seems like I torture him in all my fics!

Downtown Bayville-

Amanda and Meggan were sitting in a café comparing notes about Kurt.

'And watch out for his tail.' Amanda explained to the other girl. 'Sometimes it has a mind of its own.'

'How so?' Meggan asked.

Amanda gave her a knowing look.

'Oh, right...' Meggan nodded, as she finally understood. 'Gotcha, watch out for the tale.'

'How did you guys actually meet?' Amanda asked as she took a sip of her coffee.

'I was hiding out in an old warehouse and Kurt found me.' Meggan replied as she poured more sugar into her coffee.

'So, you're a mutant then.' Amanda said. 'What powers do you actually have?'

'I'm an empathic metamorph.' Meggan replied. 'That means I change shape according to my emotions and those of the people around me.'

'So if I was scared.' Amanda said. 'What would you look like then?'

'Green and scaly.' Meggan replied. 'Webbed feet and hands too.'

'And if I was angry?'

'Big, red and horny.' Meggan replied.

Amanda spat out her coffee in surprise at the other girl's little accidental innuendo.

'What did I say?' Meggan asked concernedly. 'Is there something on my face?'

'You do realise what you said, right?' Amanda asked as she wiped her chin with a napkin. 'Big, red and... horny.'

'Oh, right... Whoops.' Meggan winced, blushing slightly. 'How did you end up meeting Kurt?'

'We used to have the same classes.' Amanda replied. 'I kinda had a little crush on him to be honest. Then, one day I saw him arguing with a friend of his and all of a sudden, he disappeared in a puff of smoke.'

'So you're a fan girl, then?' Meggan asked bitterly. 'You only went out with him because he was a mutant.'

'Oh no, it's nothing like that.' Amanda replied. 'He was a kind, gentle boy and I wanted to get to know him better. Not to mention that he has the cutest butt ever!'

'Yeah, it's the cutest I've ever seen.' Meggan replied with a small smile.

'Have you seen his butt then?' Amanda asked.

'Naked, no. But I've stared at it lots when I've been walking behind him. What about you? Have you seen Kurt naked?'

'Unfortunately no.' Amanda sighed. 'We never got that far. We hardly got past the kissing stage. When we did kiss, oh my God, it was like magic!'

'He is an awfully good kisser, isn't he?' Meggan replied as she sighed dreamily. 'Way better than my ass of an ex, Brian.'

'Nasty break up, huh?' Amanda asked as she put her hand on Meggan's in comfort.

'You could say that.' Meggan replied. 'He dumped me when he found out I was a mutant.'

'Jerk.' Amanda muttered.

Talking about jerks, a certain super-fast jerk was sitting a couple of tables away with his Brotherhood cronies.

'Just look at them.' Pietro hissed. 'Getting all gooey over that X-Geek Wagner.'

'What's the matter, Pietro?' Lance smirked. 'Jealous?'

'What, me jealous? Of course not. I bet I could go over there and have that hot blonde chick eating out of my hand.'

'I have five bucks here that says that you can't, yo.' Todd replied.

'You're on.' Pietro said as he strutted over towards the girls.

'Bet you another five that he gets beat up.' Fred said.

'You're on.' Lance said as he laid a five on the table.

'I want in on this too, yo.' Todd added as he added some money to the pile. 'Losing a five'll be worth it if he gets his butt kicked.'

Over by the girls-

Amanda and Meggan were in the middle of their conversation when Pietro swaggered over to them and plonked himself down beside them.

'Hey cutie.' He said to Meggan. 'Why don't you ditch this fan girl and come sit with me?'

'Get bent Pietro.' Amanda replied angrily. 'We're having a private conversation.'

'About me, I'd bet.' Pietro said as he winked lecherously.

'Don't worry Amanda.' Meggan said in a calm voice. 'I know how a way to take care of this.'

She then turned to Pietro and gave him her best vulnerable female look, all wide, innocent eyes and pouted lips.

'Shall we take this outside?' She purred seductively as she gently stroked Pietro's arm.

'Ooh, a feisty one, eh?' Pietro grinned. 'You don't mess around, do you?'

'Especially when it come to hot guys.' Meggan replied.

'And I'm the hottest.' Pietro said, still with an inane grin plastered on his face. 'Let's go outside shall we?'

Amanda looked on in astonishment as Meggan linked her arm with Pietro's and made her way to the door. Before stepping outside however, the blonde metamorph turned back to Amanda and gave her a knowing wink.

'Poor Pietro.' Amanda smirked. 'He's in for it now. It almost makes me pity him... Almost.'

Outside-

Meggan lead Pietro outside to a nearby alley and pushed him against the wall.

'Hey there Hot Stuff, don't damage the goods.' The speedster said as he dusted himself off. 'Now why don't we get down to the good stuff?'

'Close your eyes first.' Meggan replied.

'Fair enough.' Pietro shrugged. 'Kinda weird but I'd do anything for a hot chick.'

'Pucker up, cutie.' Meggan said as she began to grow.

'My, we are forceful, aren't we?' Pietro smirked. 'I like that in a chick. Anything you say, babe.'

'You can open your eyes now.' Meggan said.

Pietro opened his eyes and was confronted by a seven-foot red monster with horns and huge fangs.

'W-where's the hot chick gone?' he asked, his eyes darting about fearfully.

'I am the hot chick.' Meggan replied, baring her fangs menacingly.

Pietro gulped nervously and backed tried to get away but he found himself backed against the wall with no way of escape.

'Please, don't hurt me. I'm too hot to die.' He pleaded. 'Aww c'mon, I'm pleading for mercy here.'

'Oh shut up you miserable pleader.' Meggan growled as she wrapped a massive hand around Pietro's throat. The speedster's bottom lip began to quiver and tears began to well in his eyes.

'I'm going to show you that women don't like being preyed upon by arrogant jackasses like you. We're not things that you use and throw away like a used tissue. Perhaps you can go away form this having learnt something. I kinda doubt it though, your kind doesn't listen...'

Inside-

The patrons in the café jumped when they heard the clatter of garbage cans and a girlish scream coming form behind the café. Amanda however, just chuckled evilly, knowing that Pietro had got his just desserts.

'You think he's hurt?' Lance asked.

'What makes me think I care, yo?' Todd replied. 'He had it coming.'

'Damn straight.' Fred added. 'But we'd better go check on him, he owes us money, remember?'

'Yeah, let's go collect our winnings, yo.' Todd replied. 'It was worth it after all!'

END...

Next: Fuzzy Bunnies and Painted Nails.

Meggan joins the girls for a sleepover. Which is kinda silly really, considering that they all live in the same place...