When Lily got home, she felt as if her world had fallen in on her. Her chest had that suspiciously tight feeling, as if someone was sitting on her, just as she had when her parents died. She felt battered and bruised, like she had lost a fight. It took every ounce of her strength to crawl onto the couch and lie down.

She laid there for hours and let her mind roll over the events of the day. For the longest time, all she could think was that her life was over. How could she possible go on without her sister? Petunia and Lily were not terribly close, but they were the only portion of their English family left. Lily allowed her misery to build and boil until she reached the point that simple tears couldn't release her.

She angrily threw a pillow against the wall. A magazine soon followed, and before she knew it, she was in a full fit of temper. Without thought, she stomped, threw, and ripped things in an effort to make the anger leave her body. Lily only stopped when she noticed the picture frame in her hand. It was old picture she assumed Remus had taken, because Sirius, James, and Peter were all flinging snow at her while she tried to hide behind a tree. Lily sat the frame down and sunk to the floor in defeat and cried. She cried for more than just Petunia's betrayal; she cried for everything that had gone wrong. She cried for her parents and her dreams of being an Auror. She cried for poor Barty and that time she failed a Transfiguration test. She cried for the time she fell down in the middle of the courtyard and the Slytherins laughed at her. She cried until After the tears finally ran dry, she felt exhausted and drained.

It was nearly three in the afternoon before Lily was finally able to haul herself out of the pool of misery and despair she had been swimming in. She thought of James and what kind of toll her emotions would take on him when he realized the extent of her devastation. Somehow she knew that she would be able to get over this, but she didn't think James could handle her uncertainty and sadness this early in their relationship.

It took a lot of effort to begin her task, but she repaired all of the damage she had wrought in a fairly short amount of time. A quick reparo could do wonders. After that, she stared miserably at the boxes of belongings from Petunia's. Lily normally thought arranging things was a fun activity, but she wasn't looking forward to this. She didn't want to see things that her mother had purchased or her father had fixed. Lily reluctantly unpacked one box of her things, but decided to save the other boxes for a time when she could enjoy it more. She neatly stacked three of the remaining boxes in a corner, but she removed one item from the fourth. It was a large snow globe with a small town remarkably similar to her own on the inside. Lily had always kept on a shelf in her room all through the year, but in this house she decided to place it on the mantle.

"Isn't it a little early for Christmas decorations, Lily?"

Lily jumped and clutched the snow globe protectively against her chest. "James! You startled me." She placed the globe where it belonged and turned to him. "I think it's nice to have a reminder of Christmas all year long. It reminds us what life should be about."

"What should life be about?"

"Kindness and happiness and, of course, Christmas decorations."

James grinned and sat his backpacks and a grocery bag he held in his hands in a chair. "When will you start putting up all the real decorations?"

"I usually wait until Halloween, but after that I can make no guarantees."

"You'll need plenty of time to cover everything in ribbons and pine boughs. I'll let Sirius know it won't be safe to fall asleep here."

Lily smiled, and it was just a little shaky. "Can you imagine him covered in twinkling lights and a big, red bow?"

"Sadly enough, yes." James looked uncomfortable and he ran a hand through his hair awkwardly. "Since I got home earlier than usual, I thought maybe we could try fixing dinner together."

Lily couldn't help but laugh. She couldn't begin to imagine James cooking, and she knew what the results were when she cooked, and she figured the combination of the two would be hilarious. "Let's give it a try. The worst thing that could happen would be, well-."

"A fire?" James finished. Lily nodded.

James had borrowed a cookbook from his parents' cook, and opened it to a recipe he had suggested: Tarragon Chicken Salad. It took only ten minutes to prepare and and a quick blast of the wand would have it chilled. Moulton claimed it was foolproof, and Mr. Moulton knew everything about cooking, so he told James to make a Damson and Apple Tansy to really wow Lily.

The chicken started out innocently enough. Lily mixed the dressing and James assembled the salad.

"Do you think this chicken needs to be cooked?" James asked and examined the box.

"Noooo, probably not. It's probably pre-cooked since it's in a box. Just warm it up a bit."

He shrugged and did as she said. Lily did a splendid job with the dressing, and both were feeling tremendously pleased with themselves when they sat down with their plates. The grinned in satisfaction at each other, clicked their glasses in salute to a job well-done, and took a bite of the salad.

They studiously refrained from looking at each other as they chewed until James said, "Lily, I don't think this was pre-cooked."

They looked at each other, still chewing slowly, and simulataneously spit the food out onto their plates.

"Ahh, perhaps we should cook that chicken."

"How?" James asked. "That wasn't in the cookbook."

"I guess just stick it in a pan. It's already sliced, so it shouldn't take long."

They picked out the chicken and put it in a pan with a little butter, and they mutually agreed that the Tansy was off the menu for the night. Instead, Lily produced some pudding cups from a cabinet and went into the living room to let an owl in. In the time it took her to walk a couple meters, let the owl in, give it some food, and open her letter from the Ministry notifying her they had received her application, James wreaked havoc.

The butter snapped on his bare arm and then on his shirt. James cursed and grabbed a dish towel to dab at his arm and then at his shirt. When he finally removed his attention from his favorite t-shirt, he noticed the ends of the towel were singed. James hurriedly threw the towel in the sink and was thankful the disaster was diverted. Unfortunately, in his distraction he hit the pan with his other arm. James yelled with frustration and began searching for his wand.

Lily walked back into the kitchen only to see her future husband lying on his stomach under the table. "Do I want to know what happened?"

"The damned pan burned me. I hate cooking. I am not doing this again."

"So why are you under the table?"

"My wand rolled under here." James emerged looking tried beyond belief. He glanced toward the stove and began cursing again. "The bloody chicken is burned."

"Let's call it blackened and eat the salad before my birthday."

"Deal."

As they ate, James told her about classes that day, and Lily talked about all the weird people taking their Apparating tests. When they were washing dishes in the sink, James asked quietly, "What happened with Petunia?"

He had to ask. "I got my stuff."

"Before you got your stuff."

"I helped her move furniture."

"After the furniture and before you got your stuff," he said sharply.

"We argued some."

James raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Why are you so curious?"

"Why are you trying to hide something from me? I hate it when people try to hide things from me, and you're hiding. I can tell. You look like you've been kicked."

"Petunia said if I came back here with you she never wanted to see me again." Lily paused before adding," I didn't want you to know. I didn't want your feelings to be hurt."

She watched his eyes widen and then narrow and his expression changed to something a littledarker. "Then why did you come back?"

"I would think that was rather obvious. You're more important to me than she is. I can live without Petunia."

"You can easily live without me."

"Can you live without me?" Lily asked it without aggression and tilted her head to the side to watch him.

"I have been, haven't I?"

"Why are you acting like this?"

"I don't want you to make a decision you'll regret. I will not be able to stand living with you if you're unhappy about Petunia. I can't live with someone who is unhappy, who doesn't want to be with me."

"James, I want to be with you. I will be happy with you, and I'm not going to regret this decision. Please believe that." Lily stepped closer to him and kissed him.

"But she's the only part of your family left."

"We can pretend Sirius ismy sibling. He is even weirder than she is."

James laughed and leaned down to kiss her. "For some terrifying reason, that assured me."

"That is terrifying." Lily smiled up at him. "I really do love you," she and smoothed his eyebrows with her thumbs. When his eyelids closed, she brushed her fingertips over his eyelids.

"I love hearing someone say they love me. I love you, too."

She couldn't help but laugh and place a hand on his cheek, "You're the very devil sometimes."

"But even the wickedest holds some charm, am I right?"

"I suppose I'll just have to find out."

That was a challenge James couldn't resist.

Lily was quickly caught up in a web of passion that caused her to forget the events of the terrible morning of Petunia and anything else that might have crossed her mind. All of her senses became overwhelmed by James and time seemed to lose its usual constant rhythm. It seemed in a split second hands were tugging at clothes and grappling with fastenings, but hours later they were still lingering over each other with maddening slowness.

She had never despised the alarm more than when it rung that morning and ended the night.

Lily and James sighed in unison.

"Identifying infectious diseases has never sounded so revolting."

"Taking applications to the review department sounds equally bad."

"Are either of you going to turn that alarm off, or are you planning on a lie-in?'

Lily's eyes shot open. "James? Is that Sirius?"

"Of course it is. Who else barges in other people's homes? Bloody moocher can't buy his own box of cereal," James muttered. He pulled on some clothes and slipped out the closed door. "Do you want something?"

"I just came to eat breakfast with my favorite couple. I brought the breakfast."

"What are you up to?" James asked suspiciously.

"I was just curious to see what you two were up to," Sirius said. He sat the bag of food on the table and began getting out place settings for two.

"What possessed you to do that?"

"You know, I thought you would be in a good mood."

"I might have been if you hadn't come over before we even got up."

"You were awake; the alarm was going off."

"Sirius, sometimes I want to wring your neck."

"I forgive you. Anyway, here's your breakfast. I actually just needed to tell you your mother has been hounding me for the past two days about Lily."

"What?"

"She owled me both days and then she actually apparated yesterday."

"Why?"

"She wants to know what Lily's like. I guess I'm the only reliable source she has. I thought she was going to maul me for information."

James stared blankly out the window for a moment until a paralyzing thought crossed his mind. "What if she comes over here?"

"I guess she'll meet Lily."

"We'll have to go over there…in a few days. What a disaster."

"I think it'll be fine," Sirius said with a short smile. "I'm leaving; tell Lily good morning for me."

"Fine, thanks for breakfast." James went back upstairs with every intention of salvaging the morning, but Lily was already showered and dressed. He grumbled something unintelligible and took his own shower, cursing Sirius and his meddling all the while. By the time he had showered, Lily was finishing her hair and ready to go downstairs. "Sirius brought breakfast for us."

"I'll wait for you then." James really thought she wasn't going to say anything else until she finally said, "Aren't a tiny bit sorry you called him a moocher? He brought breakfast. That's cute, James."

"Fine, he's just a meddler."

"Perhaps," she agreed. "Did he actually have a reason for visiting?"

James winced and muttered, "He told me my mother has been asking about you."

"Oh. Is, uh, she not happy about our situation?"

"I expect she's thrilled. I'm not thrilled with her involvement."

"All mothers are curious about their children's affairs."

"We should probably visit her."

"Okay."

"Is that all you have to say?"

"Ummm...just let me know what day."

"That wasn't what I wanted to hear."

James's body spent the day attending medical classes, but his mind was in an entirely different world. In fact, he was fairly certain his subconscious self drifted from one level to another for six consecutive hours. It was a known fact that James Potter was a worrier, but even to him, this amount of mulling was ridiculous. Perhaps the most absurd part was that he couldn't settle between dwelling on positive events or worrying about all the bad things.

He was pretty sure the bad things outweighed the good. In truth, the good was only like a tiny pinprick of light in the middle of a pitch-black room.

His primary concern was his family. James had to admit they acted marginally more normal than they had in the past, but they were still not in Lily's league. He couldn't imagine what would happen. Well, actually, he could, and that was the frightening part. His father would look her up and down and ask embarrassingly personal questions, and his mother would be so obnoxious and overbearing that Lily would think James had sprouted another head. Obviously anyone belonging to such an odd family couldn't be anywhere near normal. Most likely, Lily would pack up her things and leave.

And then there was Petunia. James felt like visiting Surrey and throttling her. Why did she have to act like that? Would it have been so hard to relieve Lily of the guilt she felt and let all parties involved be happy? There was no point of holding a grudge of that magnitude; it would only break of the Evans family even more. James knew what it was like to feel like a piece of you was missing due to a lack of family, and he couldn't imagine anybody else willingly entering that situation, especially Lily. She loved her sister, and James had the impression Petunia reciprocated that feeling. Why would Lily walk away from all that just to be with him?

Both of those things boiled down to taking the only good thing away from him: Lily. He was becoming so attached to her so quickly that he wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised if he woke up a morning a week in the future and found himself sewn to her. James realized he was in a pretty sad state if he was already so entranced, but he couldn't help but be drawn to her. He had spent an obscene amount of time staring at her while she was sleeping the night before. His analysis concluded she was very possibly the most dazzling woman to ever walk the earth. Lily also clicked her teeth while she was sleeping, and that was just a tiny bit distracting. After gritting her teeth for a few minutes, she would fall absolutely silent, and that was even more disconcerting. That's when he did the majority of his staring. At one point, she woke up while he was studying her, and looked at him questioningly before falling back asleep.

During all of that staring, he had fallen under some spell she had cast, and he doubted he could ever let her go. At one point he even decided an unhappy Lily would be better than no Lily. He would probably latch on to her ankles and make her drag him out the door. That made him worry about the first two points even more.

By the time his classes for the day had ended, he decided to confront both issues as best as he could by himself.

First, he went to his house to speak to his parents. One of the servants gathered them in a sitting room, and James began pacing.

"Do you want to tell us something," Mr. Potter asked, "or would you prefer to walk your way through the floor?"

"I have several points, actually. The first is that I know you went to find out about Lily from Sirius." James glared at his mother.

"I knew he would tell you."

"Of course he would. This is important. Do you two want to meet her?"

"I would personally like to at least know what my future daughter looks like before the blessed day," Mr. Potter answered with no little amount of sarcasm.

"You have seen her before. Both of you have. I asked if you wanted to meet her."

"Of course we do. Personally, the wait is killing me," James mother said, and she leaned forward on the sofa. "Shall we stop by for a visit?"

"No, I'll bring her here. Only if you two meet my conditions."

His father sighed a suffering sigh. "I knew this was inevitable."

"You two have to be nice to her. Don't be rude or ask her unseemly questions. Sir, this especially means you. And for God's sake, don't stare at her when you first meet her. Don't pick on her, and do not ask about her family. Understood?"

"Of course, James," his mother murmured. She seemed like she was fighting an inner battle, but then she lost. "Have you two set a date yet?"

"For what?"

"Your wedding?"

James was fairly certain he looked like a fish as his mouth opened and closed soundlessly. He had forgotten about getting married. He thought he was making exceptional progress on the Lily front, and he did not want to overextend his forces. "Well, we haven't set a date," he said slowly, "but we haven't really discussed it, either."

"Are you two even planning on getting married, or are you just shacking up for a long term dirty weekend?"

James shot a scathing glare at his father. "That was entirely uncalled for. I'm sure we'll get married at some point. We've just been busy; she only got out of Hogwarts the day before last."

"I always say that if an engagement lasts more thana year and a half,a wedding will never happen," his mother supplied.

"We'll get married," James said calmly.

"I would hate for her to slip through your fingers."

"I would too, which why I am terrified about her meeting you two."

"We'll be good, James. Bring her over Friday night. We'll eat dinner at eight."

"Please stick to that." Please.

The second stop was to Petunia's. He had his battle strategy mapped out: first he would ooze charm and then he would ooze anything else that required Petunia to cave. By the time he left, James had every intention of making Petunia a willing sister-in-law.

It was Petunia who answered the door, and she looked incredibly perturbed. She held a pot in her hand, and for a moment he thought she was going to clobber him. "I'm cooking dinner."

"I won't stop you. May I come in, Petunia?"

Petunia made a sound of frustration and walked away from the door. James followed her into the kitchen and watched her work at the stove for a moment. "Do you enjoy cooking?"

"It really doesn't matter since we have to eat and Vernon doesn't cook."

"Why are you so against my relationship with Lily? She will be happy with me. I love her and I'll take care of her. She doesn't have to cook or clean. Once I take a full time position with the hospital, working will be optional. My family is wealthy, so we will never have to worry about not having a home. I'm certainly not going to mistreat her. I just don't see a problem."

Petunia turned toward him with a spatula in her hand and heaved a deep and agitated sigh before saying, "I would rather she live with a beggar in a cardboard box than in a mansion with you."

James raised his eyebrows inquiringly.

"She can have every material item in the world, but when you're the person sharing them with her, she won't be happy. Vernon and I are alike. We have the same interests and the same views. We both want a child and we both want to take a firm position in our community. You and Lily have nothing in common besides that weird school. You want different things in life. She wants to laugh and enjoy herself; I doubt you even know what it's like to be happy."

James frowned. "I'm happy when I'm with her. We will develop common goals. Can't you understand that we want to be with each other?"

"No, I truly can't. I can't imagine a sweet, loving girl like my little sister trapping herself with a depressing monster like you."

"What would it take to convince you I'm not like that?"

"A personality transplant," Petunia answered steadily. She turned back to her cooking and James recognized the dismissal.

"Fine. I accept that you don't like me. If you want, you can call me names and hate me until I die, but can't you look past that for Lily? Couldn't you continue to love your sister even though she loves me?"

Petunia turned and looked him squarely in the face. "No, because hating you will last much longer than your life. I will gladly detest your memory long after you're dead."

That made two people. She and Snape could form a club. "Will you hate Lily?"

"No, and I don't hate her now. I just can't watch her throw away her life with you. She is a smart, beautiful, talented girl who has a tremendous amount of potential, but she's wasting herself on you. She'll turn into a middle-aged woman desperate to escape the life she lives, but with no way out."

James shook his head as he thought the woman Petunia described would actually turn out to be herself. "I can't believe you're turning your back on her."

"It's like a horror movie; at some point I just have to change the channel. Why don't you leave now, Potter? There will be no changing my mind."

"You're hurting yourself most of all; you're missing out on knowing Lily. I'm sure she will forgive you if you change your mind. Good evening." James didn't bother walking any further than the hallway before he disapparated.

Petunia shook her head with regret. She couldn't imagine never seeing her vibrant sister again, but at least she would never be required to see James Potter ever again.

A/N: Apparently I have one foot in the insane asylum, because I can't seem to get this ignorant chapter right. I think I have it edited correctly again only to find words in inappropriate places and bad punctuation. Let's not forget that my chapters are still messed up! Nobody would believe the amount of talking to myself I've done trying to fix it.