A/N: Okay, Lotrox has claimed the boggart scene idea, so, thanks for that, Lotrox! Also, regarding this chapter, thanks to Tigoamy for the Ron table manners thing, and lizztigger for her Golden trio fights and everyone calls them the golden trio. Incidentally, I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again: You reviewers are awesome. Without all the cliches you've been supplying, this fic would've probably died several chapters ago.

Chapter 17

Bad Blood Between the Golden Trio?

Hermione was angry at Ron again. This happened a lot, although it hadn't happened for awhile now, since they were on friendlier terms now that they were able to kiss each other when they weren't fighting. But, now, Ron had gone and said something. It seemed that Ron was always going and saying something, but this time, apparently, he had crossed a line. Earlier that day, he had said, "Hermione, I don't like how your hair looks today."

"Why should it matter how my hair looks, Ron?" asked Hermione in a tone that should have told Ron to retreat from the topic but apparently did not. "Because there's more to me than my looks, and you should appreciate the other things," added Hermione angrily.

"I do appreciate the other things. But are you telling me that your looks can't even be part of the reason that I like you? Don't you like how I look?" asked Ron, not sounding offended at the prospect that Hermione might not like how he looked, simply trying to score a point in the argument.

"I only like how you look because I like what's on the inside. It's a psychological thing. Since I like who you are, then I like what you look like. For example, I don't much like who you're being at this particular moment though, so you're not looking all that good right now," said Hermione.

"Oh, come on, that's a load of rubbish," replied Ron.

"So you're saying I'm just as shallow as you are?" asked Hermione angrily.

So, this was why she was angry at Ron as they gathered in the computer room that night to write their next chapter. This becomes important later on, but not until after the authors' note, which Harry suddenly began to type.

A/N: The major thing that we need to clear up in this a/n is why Cinnamon didn't say "brave" in his lines last chapter. The real reason is that I forgot, which means that you our story better than we do. Which makes us jealous. Although, you don't know what will happen next chapter (sneak a/n from Gryffindor777 (that's right, an author's note within an author's note) neither do the characters, incidentally... but i can exclusively reveal that Fred and George return as guest-author's to write a Yule-Ball chapter complete with a show-down between Hermione and Mary-Sue)) so ha! Anyway, the reason that we're going to use so as to give our story credibility again (assuming it had any in the first place) is that Cinnamon and Minty only need to use the word-insertion rules when they are in sight of one another, as the function of the sentences is to differentiate them from each other. Insanepyroshorty, although we will concede to you on the spelling of weimaraner and claim that it was an intentional typo, I have personally seen a weimeraner (Gryffindor777 has one, though the characters don't know this) which had at least 8 inches or so of tail. Whether or not this is considered a stub, it is definitely substantial enough to be chased, although perhaps not caught. Oh, and for last chapter, most creative review goes to Hrrypttrfan, who wrote a poem. Runner-up goes to Grim-Reapers Assitant, who made a discount button. Oh, by the way, word of the chapter this chapter will be "passion," so watch for it and its bastardized forms.

"All right," said Hermione, once Harry had finished. "We got a review stating that the 'Golden Trio' needed to get into a fight in our fanfiction. And as I'm already pissy at Ron, I think that now would be a good time to do it. Maybe taking out my anger in this creative outlet will keep me from actually slapping somebody," said Hermione. Nobody had the nerve to argue with her as she began to type.

The golden trio were eating in the great hall. Or, that is to say, Hermione and Harry were eating. What Ron was doing can hardly be described as eating. He was more like passionately attacking the food. He seemed to think that there was much danger of it escaping if not handled quickly and therefore he seemed to think that the fact that half of it was running passionately down the front of his robes was a strategic sacrifice that needed to be made for the cause. Hermione, who was at first disgusted by this, thought that it might be a good thing after-all, because maybe it'd get Aurora to be disinterested in Ron. Then he'd have to come crawling back to her. Then she'd be able to decide at her leisure whether or not such a slob deserved her. She was leaning toward 'no' at the moment. Unfortunately, Aurora didn't seem to be too turned off by Ron's disorderly eating. In fact, she gave him a kiss on the cheek as she left the Great Hall early to make sure that she got to their first class of the day early.

Once she was out of ear-shot, Hermione hissed passionately at Ron, "I suppose you think you've traded up don't you? Glad to have her interested in you instead of me?"

"You aren't interested in me anymore?" asked Ron, concerned.

Hermione was enraged by Ron's apparent lack of concern for her feelings to the extent that he did not even notice them at most points. "You make me want to go into paroxysms of rage! A paroxysm is a spasm or fit," she explained, owing to the dazed and confused looks on Ron and Harry's faces.

"What's wrong with me?" asked Ron.

"You don't care about me! You're always too interested in your food, or your bloody Quidditch! Incidentally, what do you think Freud would say was your subconscious psychological motive for playing around with broomsticks all day chasing after balls?"

At this point when she was typing, Hermione realized that Ginny was also in the room (she knew Harry wouldn't be offended by the psychobabble, and rather hoped that Ron would be). "Er... Ginny, that doesn't apply to you, of course," said Hermione apologetically.

"It's all right," said Ginny, who was giggling.

"Hey why do you need to bring Quidditch into this?" Harry passioned (that's right, we've decided to make 'to passion' into a verb meaning "to speak passionately". So there.)

"Oh, shut up! You're so narcissistic. That means you're too self-absorbed," she added, once again because of the looks. "Not everything's about you and your Quidditch addiction, so stop butting in!"

"I'm not butting in! You're just jealous of me because I've got a broomstick! That's right! Freud would say you've got 'Broomstick Envy'!" Harry passioned passioningly.

"Stop butting in! I'm trying to have a good fight with this..." she mumbled the next bit so that it was unclear and she would need to repeat herself later for comedic effect, "...over here!" finished Hermione.

Ron unwisely spoke again. Seemed this fellow was always speaking unwisely. He said, "Did you just call me a prostitute? Because, remember, that's my sister's job."

"I called you a lady-of-the-night. It's a euphemism. A euphemism is a way of saying an unpleasant thing in a pleasant way. Learn some words you two!" retorted Hermione.

Ron became enraged and therefore became incoherent, as he always did when he was enraged. He also was so enraged that he only spoke in multi-syllable words. "Yourself paroxysm! Multi-faceted delusional, eerily simultaneous. Similarly puerile insatiably. Abstemious!" Then, Ron got over his monosyllaphobia (not a word, for the record) in a big way, saying, "I don't know what none of them words mean!"

Ron, for some reason, was grinning. "Oooh, I want a go," he said, finally becoming brave enough to talk to Hermione. Shocked at him talking to her at all, she decided to let him have his chance. For convenience, this is going to be one of those chapters in which Ron gets over his lack of typing ability and types anyway.

"You're intolerably stupid!" said Hermione. "Ever since this fanfiction has started, you've been nothing but a shallow prat who's gone for the best-looking girl."

"That's weird, because most of this story, you've come across in a mostly favorable light. In fact, you're the only one of the characters who's escaped unscathed. The current author must really think you're something special. He also happens to think that you have excellent hair. Although that doesn't matter, because it's what's underneath the hair that counts. That would have come out better, by the way, except that the current author doesn't have your way with words," said Ron passionately.

Ron looked up, to see Hermione smiling. "That was actually kinda nice Ron. 'Cept for the bit about it being what's under the hair that counts. That was just dumb. But anyway..."

"Wait, before you do anything we're going to regret," said Ginny, "just remember that it's only polite to keep any snogging out of Harry's and my sight. That is, unless you guys want to see the two of us getting, er... passionate. Good pick of word of the chapter, by the way. Anyhow... I think I want a go, if you've fulfilled your purpose, Ron? You guys've been using too good grammar and have been forgetting the typoes. Which is what happens whe you guys use fanfiction as an outlet to solve your personal problems."

"Oh, sure, go ahead," said Ron, who was just glad to be on Hermione's good side again. By the way, for those of you who have been waiting for it, (Skittles is the only one I can find who mentioned it, at the moment) this is the point in the story where Ron reaches the emotional maturity level of the giant squid (this is more of a compliment than it sounds, the giant squid is actually pretty emotionally mature.)

"So, you choose me over Aurora?" asked Hermione in a voice chock-full of giddy passion.

"No, I didn't say that," says Ron.

"Your gonna goe out withs Aurora even though you've just said that it's what's under my hair that counts?" asked Hermione confusedly.

"That was the author who thinks that, not me. You must have gotten confused," said Ron.

"You're intolerable!" said Hermione, leaving the table in a huff.

"Here's a free teddy-bear!" said Deamus, shoving a teddy-bear toward Hermione.

Hermione was flattered by this attention from Deamus. She considered going out with him on the grounds that he had just showed that he would be there through the emotional thick and thin, and give her free teddy-bears.

Then, she decided that this would be a bad idea, on the grounds that Snape was working on an antidote for the piss-potion that would be able to turn Dean and Seamus back into thier normal selves. But, still, that didn't mean she couldn't use Deamus to make Ron jealous. He was passionately sexy. And maybe she could talk to Snape about maybe not progressing to quickly on the potion so that she'd have some time to make her plan work. She decided to make her way toward his office.

Cinnamon, who was sitting next to Ginny, who was sitting next to Harry, who was very confused, was wearing one of Ginny's discount buttons. It said, "Dragons passion hummingbirds seductively. Lovely prophecy." When you pressed it, it read, "Ginny, Harry, and Ron, like to play with broomsticks and balls together. Eww."

Minty suddenly made an appearance since he hasn't lately. "Bad blood between the golden trio?" he asked, smirking because his sentence actually made some sense this time.

"You're too brave, Minty," said Cinnamon passioningately. "If you don't back off, I'll turn you into a brave trout!"

"Why's it a bloody brave trout?" asked Minty.

"Well, it may not be brave. But it will have blood, you brave!" said Cinnamon. That's right. Malfoy was a young native-American man, although he had apparently never told anybody this, and didn't look like one. It was only a parshial thing. He was a direct matrilineal descendant of Powhatan on his father's side.

Malfoy was passionately confused. Both of him. Or something. Simple sentences rock. So do fragments. Author's notes rock too. It's time to write one. Because we need to go to bed. It's getting late. And there's nothing else funny to say right now.

A/N: Well... sorry there's not more grammatical or spelling errors. Some people were too busy trying to get snogged to worry about putting in the correct number of errors. We'll make up for it in a later chapter, hopefully. At least I was able to save the button trend.

A/N from Gryffindor777: Oh well, that's all I've got for tonight, and I wanted to post before I go to bed, so I'm just gonna post it at the length it is, and I'm not going to go back to put in more grammatical/spelling errors. Hopefully the chapter's got a fair number of redeeming qualities anyway. By the way, the teddy-bear thing was another case of workplace insertion, as one of my coworkers tonight got offered a "free-teddy-bear" by some 5 year old kid. It cracked me up, and I thought Deamus was the best one to give the line to.