Disclaimer: —sigh— You enjoy making me suffer, don't you? And me with no sleep either. Damn you, copyright people. All right, I don't own Inuyasha or anything related to him or his homies. And, though it's my favorite saying to date, I do not own the line that titles this chapter, because it can be found in A3 S2 of A Midsummer Night's Dream. In short, I have no possessions that make me any amount of money. Happy now? Makes one of us.
A/N: Hey, longest chapter to date! Hardest, too. Finally got it done.
Yeeeeeeeeeeeep, my gods and goddesses! Such vehemence from all of you! I told you I'd fix it, didn't I? Put the big bludgeons down! And watch the movie/read the Cliff's notes for Midsummer Night's Dream like medlii (arigatou for doing that… probably decreased your stress and mine. And yep, she can be a tad scary sometimes… eh, well, can't blame her. Probably doesn't get much action as Naraku's daughter… —haul mind out of gutter now—). Doing either of those will be guaranteed to decrease your homicidal tendencies. I promise this isn't forever!
Okay, about this chapter. The song in this one is called Kagome Kagome, and I picked it because it's the only simple kind of song I know in Japanese. (All right, it's the only song I've ever heard of in Japanese… or could find the lyrics to. .;) It's the song to a children's game, and I thought it was something Rin might sing. The full version is here:
Kagome, Kagome, kago no naka no tori wa
Itsu itsu deyaru?
Yoake no ban ni
Tsuru to kame ga subetta.
Ushiro no shoumen dare?
And the translation is here:
Kagome, Kagome, the bird in the cage
When will you come out?
In the evening of the dawn
The crane and turtle slipped.
Who stands right behind you now?
Okay. Whoo. Longish note. On with it!
9
Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be
"You did it?" Shippou asked eagerly when Hyakunan trotted back to the tree they'd designated as their hideout. "You got 'em? Kagome and Inuyasha?"
The green-haired boy nodded in a gesture of utmost satisfaction. "While they were sleeping. Easy peasy."
"Cool. Let's see 'em try to fight now." Both boys grinned hugely.
The grins disappeared as a childish voice an octave or two above theirs announced itself somewhere nearby.
"Kagome, kagome, kago no naka no tori wa…"
Shippou frowned. "That sounds like that human girl that follows Sesshoumaru around…"
"A human girl?"
"Hai. I think Kagome said her name was Rin, or something…" They both peered through a clump of concealing bracken, wary of the bright moonlight.
"…tsuru to kame ga subetta, ushiro no shoumen dare?" A pigtailed little girl wearing a red-and-white checked yukata was singing the nursery rhyme to herself as she added some bellflowers to the little bouquet in her hand. The two boys traded glances, unsure of how to take this. On one hand, she was distracted and not looking up—fair game for whatever pranks they could think of. On the other hand, they weren't sure how she'd react. If she went crying to Sesshoumaru, for instance…
Rin finished singing and looked up at a songbird that had picked up where she'd left off. It happened to be sitting in the same bush as the two pranksters, and they hadn't hidden themselves quite as cleverly as they'd thought.
"Oh!" To both boys' perturbation, she didn't seem the least bit concerned. "You're the kitsune that follows Inuyasha no baka!"
Hyakunan grinned at the epithet, but Shippou bristled. "Well, you walk around with a talking toad-wart and Sesshoumaru no baka."
The innocent smile vanished instantly, replaced by what would someday develop into an impressive arsenal of full fury. "Don't you dare call Sesshoumaru-sama a baka! He knows everything in the world—and Rin-chan bets you don't even know your foot from a frogfish!"
"Do so!"
"Hah. You lie, too. Sesshoumaru-sama doesn't lie."
"I bet he does."
"Does not!"
"Does so."
"Does not!"
"Sesshoumaru's a liar…"
"He is not!"
"Liar, liar, li-ar…"
"He is not!" The hapless bunch of flowers lost their heads, decapitated by Rin's outraged grip. Hyakunan raised his eyebrows as she continued at full volume. What was it with girls? He'd seen older ones do the exact same thing in defense of his Dad. Sometimes while Dad was watching them, though they never knew it. 'Cept those girls were lots taller, and didn't sing kid's rhymes…
Maybe she wasn't quite the same as Dad's girls. After all, then where would the wind witch be in this? The taiyoukai had gotten extremely upset over her, unless Hyakunan's instincts were completely mistaken… and, being his Dad's son, they never were.
By now Shippou looked as if he'd been facing a tornado; even his hair was pulled flat against his head in an attempt at defense. Little girls were scary when they wanted to be. Hyakunan briefly considered watching to see if it got any more entertaining, then decided to be merciful. Plus, he was curious again.
"Where is Sesshoumaru, anyway?"
Rin had paused for breath, so the change of topic didn't faze her too much. "Rin-chan doesn't know. Rin-chan is staying with Kagura-sama. She's teaching Rin-chan wind magic," she confided.
"Sesshoumaru let you stay with Kagura?" Shippou asked, evidently deciding it was safe to metaphorically come out.
Rin thought for a moment, then shook her head. "Rin-chan hasn't seen Sesshoumaru-sama, but Rin-chan is safe with Kagura-sama. She's very strong." The little girl wrinkled her nose. "But now Kouga no baka is with Kagura-sama, and she isn't teaching Rin-chan anymore. She and Kouga no baka have been wrestling for a long time. She put Rin-chan on the ground when they started." She sighed. "Rin-chan is bored."
Hyakunan noted idly that the odds that Sesshoumaru had explained certain things concerning men and women were extraordinarily low, and decided not to educate Rin. Dad had never fully explained it, either, but considering his powers, he hadn't needed to. Observation was education enough in that case.
As his Dad had inadvertently taught him, though, such things were immensely entertaining to interrupt.
He was about to suggest this to the other two when a sharp WHAP resounded off something hard and dense somewhere dangerously close by.
Rin squeaked and whirled to see what it was, but Shippou and Hyakunan were more experienced at this and yanked her into the bushes with them. It was just barely in time; the source of the battle emerged an instant later, cursing at the top of its lungs in an astonishingly familiar fashion.
"Damn violent bitch! What the hell was that for?"
"For being an asshole," the young woman snapped, still gripping the boomerang with which she had obviously just beaned the doggie-eared boy glaring at her. "I know it's too much for you to be civil to Kagome-chan to her face, but do you have to insult her behind her back as well? To me?"
"I was not! I—"
"'Screeching like a constipated cat' isn't an insult?"
The little nekoyoukai on the girl's shoulder hissed. Hyakunan frowned. Hey… I know that cat. Isn't that Kagome…?
"That was Kouga I was talking about, wench! Listen for one damn minute, why don't you!"
"Or 'stubborn as six stuck goats'?"
"Yeah! No! Shit—mind your own business!"
"Or 'never here'?"
"Yeah—hey." The boy colored as if he'd been dipped in warpaint. "Th—er… I mean—dammit, shut up."
"Mm-hm."
"Don't go 'mm-hm' at me like you just won, or something!"
"Mm-hm."
"Dammit, stop that!"
"If you say so, Inuyasha."
Hyakunan abruptly learned exactly what everybody meant by a 'sinking feeling.' It felt as if everything but him had suddenly gained twenty feet of height. …'Inuyasha…' is that guy…?
Oh, crap…
Shippou squinted at the bickering pair as they moved away. "Huh. Would've thought that Inuyasha would stick with Kagome from now on… I mean, if that stuff works and all. Seems like Sango and Miroku hardly leave each other alone, anyways."
"Eh heh…"
The kitsune looked away from his peephole and noticed Hyakunan's distinct lack of animation. "What's with you?"
"Er… who did you say those guys were?"
"The lady was Sango. She's a taijiya, but she's nice." The fox kit's green eyes narrowed. "You know Inuyasha, right?"
"Um…" The bark on that tree was suddenly and utterly fascinating. So was that bug crawling across Rin's foot. And the moss growing on that rock…
"You put that pink water on him a little while ago, right?" Shippou was definitely agitated.
"Eh… I put it on a guy a little while ago," Hyakunan hedged.
"Who?"
"Um…" The green-haired boy gave up. "A guy with earrings and a robe. He had some sort of glove with beads on his hand."
Shippou smacked his forehead. "You put that stuff on Miroku?"
"Is that not good?" Hyakunan asked in what he hoped was an innocent voice.
"Sango's gonna kill me!" The kitsune was half passed out from hyperventilation. "We've gotta find him before he finds some other girl, or I'm dead! And he'll be dead, too!"
"What happened to the nice lady who follows Inuyasha no baka around so much?" Rin asked cautiously. "The one in the very short green yukata?"
Shippou's eyes, already huge with panic, nearly popped out of his head. "He can't find Kagome! She'll kill him too!"
"I can try to fix it," Hyakunan offered shamefacedly. He felt bad; he'd wanted to do something nice, and gotten it tangled up worse.
Shippou spun on him. "No. You give me the pink stuff. I'll do it, I know which one is which. How'd you put it on last time?"
"I put them to sleep."
"We'll have to, if we want to get Inuyasha to cooperate," Shippou muttered. "Okay, you follow, and do that when I say so."
"Rin-chan wants to come too!"
The boys looked at her uneasily.
"Rin-chan is coming too," the little girl told them hotly. "This is much more interesting than Kouga no baka!"
…………………………………
Sometimes Inuyasha thought he could cheerfully become a monk. With the notable exception of Miroku, they didn't deal with women. Particularly not infuriatingly calm women with outrageously expressive Looks and entirely too much arm muscle. (He rubbed his bruised and lumpy crown surreptitiously, checking to make sure Sango had gone.) Or stubborn, vocal, violent, touchy, big-eyed, short-skirted, fearless, matchless, beautiful—
AaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAaaaaaagh! He banged his head repeatedly on a tree trunk that happened to be convenient. Why him? Bam. Why now? Bam. Why the hell did he have to keep thinking about her? Bam. He didn't need any more distractions! As if Naraku and the Shikon shards weren't enough, there was Miroku's curse, Sango's family issues, Shippou in general, Inuyasha's own youkai blood and his temperamental sword, Kagome's modern-day home and her insistence on visiting it, Kikyou—
He bashed his head one more time, hard enough that the tree suffered a permanent dent and the pain of collision momentarily distracted him from that all-too-familiar road of thoughts. Don't fucking need this right now…
It worked so well that two seconds later he conked out.
……………………………
"Quick, he won't stay down long!"
"Gimme the pink stuff—"
"Rin-chan knew Inuyasha was a baka. Only a baka would hit his head against a tree."
"Sesshoumaru no baka…"
"He is not!"
"Is too."
"Is not!"
"Quiet! You'll wake him up!"
"Hai, hai."
………
"How do you put it on?"
………
"Rin-chan thinks Hyakunan-kun forgot…"
"I did not!"
"Then tell me how to put it on…"
"…On his eyes and nose."
"You're sure?"
"Hai, of course I am!"
"Rin-chan has heard Jaken say the same thing when he doesn't know."
"I do so."
"Whatever. It should work anyway."
"Great. Now let's get out of here before he wakes up."
………………………………………………
What the fuck just happened?
Inuyasha groaned and cursed faintly as his head complained at full volume. For a moment there he'd thought he'd heard the brat's voice, and a bunch of other brats with him. Why the fuck was he on the ground?
Oh. He'd been banging his head.
…That couldn't have been it. He'd been thrown headfirst through trees a hell of a lot bigger than that one and kept conscious. Shit… I have no idea what happened.
That wasn't good at all. It didn't help that his eyes felt somewhat gummy, as if he'd been out for a while. And his nose was stinging, too—although that could've been the tree. He sneezed, then glanced warily around. Nope, nothing—no sounds, no smells, nothing to see or freak out about. Yet.
Faint but distinct noises behind him. Yelling. His ears flicked toward them, registering the sounds as familiar.
Very familiar.
In fact…
"—why would I lie? Look at me—please, Kagome-sama! Do you think I could look you in the eyes and lie to you?"
"You do it well enough every other time! Get away from me!" The hanyou's ears flattened instantly at Kagome's vicious snarl. Fuck, she's pissed! What the hell'd the bouzu do now? And why's he sounding so whiny?
"I beg of you—"
"Just shut up! What about Sango, hm? If you're not lying to me, then what about her? You shithead, she's in love with you!"
What does that—
"I regret it, but Sango will—"
"Don't you even start that again! You asshole!"
—have to do—
"She will survive—but your infatuation with Inuyasha—"
"Don't you say a damn word!"
"He can't love you, Kagome-sama!"
—with shi…?
The question abruptly cut off in his mind as she came bursting through the greenery in front of him.
She froze.
He froze.
Holy fuck…
It was, he would later admit to himself—and no one else—something like taking one step from pitch darkness into dazzling, pure sunlight. She was covered in bits of leaf and lichen. Her hair might have been brushed a day or so ago. Furious tears had stained her eyes and cheeks puffy red, and she would probably kick herself later when she had to mend all the rips in her clothing.
She was stunning beyond words.
"Inuyasha…" She seemed to have lost her former enraged verbosity.
In a role reversal that everyone would later consider nothing less than astonishing, however, the hanyou said the first thing that came to his mind.
"Kagome, I love you."