Optimus Prime was gathered with a depressed group of Autobots backstage. The humans had migrated across the valley to hear the Decepticons play a heavy metal song.

"Exit light/Enter night/Take my hand/You're off to never neverland!" Megatron sang.

"Hey!" Jazz exclaimed. "He's changin' the words! He's cheatin', Prime!"

"Of course, Jazz," Optimus replied. "Such is to be expected of the Decepticons."

"Well," Jazz said, "if you're just gonna ignore everything I say, I might as well go home." Jazz began to transform into Porche mode.

"No, Jazz," Prime said conciliatorily. "I am sorry; you were right about the instruments; we should have started out playing them."

"Thank ya," Jazz said, returning fully to robot mode. "Now, if we can just get some hard-rockin' numbers goin', we can blow those Decepticon bums right outta – "

"Hold, Jazz," Prime interjected. "While I agree instrumentation may be useful, I hold by my position on the music - it must be wholesome, and palatable for the whole family."

"Hm …." Jazz replied doubtfully.

"We must not sink to the Decepticon level, with overly loud or offensive performances. If we are to win the trust and friendship of the humans, we must do it nobly, with happy, lovable music, which is good for everyone," Optimus Prime continued. "And I am confident that the analysis which Prowl and I performed of the human musical catalogue and popular charts, in consultation with yourself and Blaster, has produced a … 'cool' set list … which will enable us to win this contest while upholdingour heroicprinciples."

Jazz had reservations, but held them back for the moment.

"And, thanks to Bumblebee's reconnaissance behind enemy lines – "

"Aw, it was easy, Optimus," the yellow spy robot said. "They're so wrapped up in rehearsals they don't notice much of anything. Well," he added, "except for our number …."

"Yes, we've heard about all of the laughing," Optimus said. "But Megatron's other comments … have given me an idea for our next performance. Jazz … assemble your horn section."

Jazz brightened considerably.

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"All right!" Skywarp exclaimed.

"Yeah!" Rumble seconded. "We kick tail!"

"The humans really like us," Thundercracker said, adjusting his bass.

"Yes, I knew that we would defeat the Autobots in this contest," Megatron commented. "Optimus Prime is far too stiff, and thinks that all of the humans are exactly the same way. He has no chance!"

The Autobots had begun their next song: a Huey Lewis and the News number. Autobots were actually playing instruments this time, although Wheeljack clearly seemed ill at ease as part of the horn section … possibly because of his lack of a mouth. He did become pretty proficient at twirling his trumpet like a baton as the number went on, though.

"It's hip to be square!" Optimus Prime sang. "So hip to be square!" To accentuate his point, the Autobot leader transformed into tractor trailer cab form. "See! I'm a square!" he exclaimed.

"You can say that again," Skywarp remarked.

The Decepticons laughed. "Still," Megatron chuckled, "this performance is … moderately more successful than their last. Megaband!" he called to his players. "Prepare … for the Genesis Medley!"

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Autobot spirits were higher after their somewhat more successful second performance. However, confidence was again weakened by the sounds of loud, complex music coming from the Decepticon stage.

Rumble and Ramjet managed the coordinated drumming required by "Second Home By The Sea," with Skywarp adding the Mike Rutherford-esque guitar and Soundwave attempting to fill Tony Banks' shoes behind the keyboards. Megatron added menace to the lines "You're the next in line! You're all the next in line!" adopted from the live interpretation of "Domino: Part II – The Last Domino." Blaster and Jazz were able to identify pieces from other Genesis tracks in the medley, sections chosen to emphasize the Decepticons' notable musical prowess. With "Firth Of Fifth", Skywarp imitated the live work of Daryl Stuermer – or former guitarist Steve Hackett – as Ramjet and Rumble continued their Phil Collins and Chester Thompson act on the drums, with Thundercracker providing the Rutherford (or Stuermer, in later live shows) bass support.

During "Turn It On Again," Jazz added another note of alarm. "Aw no; they've even lifted the introductions during the song, like the band did on the '92 tour."

Indeed, Megatron was introducing the performers in his Megaband. "Downtown Polyhex," was about as creative as he got in introducing their place of origin, but he was giving each performer a chance for individual acknowledgement from the crowd.

By this point, Starscream had acquired lead tambourine, due to the … mysterious disappearance … of Kickback, the former player, and was doing a half-hearted Collins imitation on that instrument.

"And on tambourine," Megatron said, "… Starscream. You don't need to cheer for him," he added.

"Rrrrrr …." Starscream grumbled.

"And me!" Megatron concluded. "Megatron! Your mast- -head on the ship of Transformer/flesh creature friendship!" he caught himself.

As the number resumed in full, the Autobots returned to consulting (those that weren't listening to the concert, anyway).

"We're in trouble," Jazz said.

"Agreed," Optimus Prime conceded. "Prowl, do you feel it is time for Plan K?"

"Yes, Prime."

"Hm …." Jazz said. "Could work – since ya won't just yet us rock out – "

"Good," Prime said. "Please – get Grimlock ready."

"No," Grimlock said moments later. "Me Grimlock no like namby-pamby, touchy-feely, tuggy-huggy Autobot playlist. Me want Dinobot munch-metal set."

"C'mon, man," Jazz said. "I'd like ta change a couple things too … couple dozen," he digressed. "But – we need ya, Grimlock."

"Yes," Prowl seconded, having formed a plan of verbal attack. "We're in danger of being beaten by the Decepticons. Defeated."

"Rmm," Grimlock growled.

"But – with this number, we have a chance to strike back, to build towards a victory!" Prowl continued. "If you have the cast-iron manifold for it!"

"Hrmm." Grimlock's resolve sounded as though it were weakening.

"Yeah!" Jazz added. "You wanna beat the Decepts, right?"

"Mmm," Grimlock murmured. "… Perhaps …. Should me Grimlock do it?" he asked, turning to his fellow Dinobots.

" … Yes," Sludge said.

"We're behind you, boss," Snarl encouraged.

"Take one for the team," Swoop said. "We understand."

"… Very well," Grimlock replied. "Me Grimlock will do it, for victory. 'Cons no beat us." He turned towards the stage. "Slag – fetch banjoes."

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Banjoes? I know why, because I've already started the next section. But this was a good place for a chapter break, so the readers will have to wait (if probably only a day or two) to find out ….