Chapter 20: Bitter Reality

The room was dark. I felt alone, more alone than before Cliff had come to live with me. I looked down at the cedar box in my hands. I ran my fingers over the smooth wood, carefully lifting the golden latch. Suddenly a burst of sound quietly filled the room.

"I know this song…" I whispered to myself. I had heard this song many times in my dreams. I never knew where it had come from, or what it meant, but I knew it was there. The song was sweet and almost haunting as it filled the room.

"He was the boy from my dream… he was the one I gave the music box to… this music box…" I repeated in my head. All of a sudden it was all coming back to me. That was the year that my family had moved to a city on the other side of the country. I had come many times to my grandfather's farm, and every year he… Cliff… would be there to meet me. I had told him that when I left… I wouldn't forget him, but I did. I did forget him. I forgot everything about this place. I placed my hand on the shell necklace that lay on my neck.

I ran to the door and rashly swung it open, the rain forming a blinding sheet. I looked for him, but he wasn't there. I walked back into the house and put down the delicate box. Grabbing my coat and umbrella I ran outside, slamming the door behind me. I had to find him.

"Cliff! Cliff… please Cliff! You can't stay out here… it's gotten colder. Please Cliff, come back" I called out into the dark. I ran out of the farm and started down the road to town. I continued calling out, just hoping that he would hear me. The wind had picked up, and the rain came down in hard violent drops.

"Cliff… I'm sorry, for everything! I'm sorry I forgot… I never meant to…" My voice started to die away, the wind covering my only chance of finding him. All of a sudden someone grabbed my free hand. I quickly whipped around.

"Cliff!" I said joyously… but it wasn't Cliff.

"What are you doing out here? It's pouring. I thought you said you would meet me at the Inn," he said to me.

"I'm sorry Kai; I have to find Cliff…" I replied, but Kai started to pull me toward the open door to the inn.

"I can't hear a word you're saying. The wind is drowning out your voice. Come on let's go inside, it's nice and warm," he said. I was reluctant, but my better sense told me to go inside. After all, Cliff wouldn't listen to me right now anyways. Kai led me into the Inn. A burst of heat hit my face, and light filled my eyes.

Once I entered the room, everything seemed to disappear. The room had such a wonderful vibe. The music was on full blast, and everyone around us seemed to be dancing and having a good time. Kai lead me up to the bar and set me down.

"Hey Doug, two beers please," he said sitting down next to me. I looked around at all the smiling faces, but I couldn't seem to get my mind off the fact that Cliff was outside in the rain. Doug came back with two beers, setting one down in front of me, and then other in front of Kai. Kai picked the glass up and took a huge sip. I looked at the dirty colored liquid in my glass. I hated the taste of beer, ever since I had taken a sip of my father's when I was seven. I was hesitant at first, but eventually I picked up the glass and took a sip, after all, I was here for a good time.

After I had finished a full glass of beer, my mind seemed to wander from all other thoughts that had once occupied my mind. Soon enough I found myself out on the dance floor, dancing it up with Kai. The music was booming and my head was pounding, but I just kept on dancing. After downing another beer I started to get dizzy. I stumbled my way past the other dancers, Kai following behind. I fell upon the banister leading to the second floor, and sat down upon the steps. I placed my head in my hand, hoping to subdue the violent spinning that had taken over my mind. I couldn't think, I couldn't see, all I could do was laugh.

"Whoa, wow Kai," I giggled stupidly, "What a party! Can we go find someone to sit for a second, I need a rest." Kai collapsed upon the stairs next to me, swinging his arm around my neck, still holding a beer in the other. I might have been a little on the drunk side, but Kai was totally spent. I could barely hold his head on straight, let along comprehend what I was saying.

"Huh? Oh yeah babe. Come on, let's go upstairs, I'm pretty sure there is a room open," he laughed, and after a bit of stumbling, finally made it up the stairs. I followed cautiously, the alcohol starting to take my senses one by one. I made it to the door and violently shoved it open. It was dark inside, but I eventually found a light switch. I took off my coat and threw it on the floor, then finally relaxed as I collapsed on the bed laughing.

"Kai… I'm having a great time. The music is wild, and the dancing is great," I said as I lay face up on the bed. The pillow was soft and it cushioned my aching head. Suddenly the lights turned out. The room was pitch black, and the soft rain could still be heard banging up against the window.

"Yeah man… I'm havvvving a great time toooo," Kai said. His words we very slurred. I watched him pace the room, stumbling, and finally his shadowy figure approached the side of the bed. He knelt over me and kissed me on the lips, and soon enough he was on the bed, hovering over me. He continuously kissed me upon the lips and the neck, his strong hands I could sense by my waist. My head was still spinning, but I could tell exactly what was going on. I felt one of hands go up under the edge of my shirt, gently pulling it upward. He leaned in toward my ear.

"Now are you ready for a good time?" He asked, pulling a little harder on my shirt. I could smell the alcohol on his breath, the foul odor filling my mouth as he kissed me again. It snapped me to reality. I pushed him off me and he rolled over to the other side of the bed. I rolled off the bed and stood up, shyly pulling my shirt down again. I took a second to regain my breath.

"Kai I… I don't want to do this right now. I've only known you for a few weeks. We have plenty of time… right Hun?" I asked him, fidgeting with the edge of my shirt. Kai groaned and rolled over, sitting up at the edge of the bed, he looked straight up at me and rubbed his head.

"Jen, it doesn't work that way. Every year I come at the beginning of the summer to run the beach shack." He stopped. He walked up to me, and each step he took, I took a step back until I was pinned up against the wall. He pressed his lips against mine and pounded the wall with one fist. "Jen… I've had a lot of fun this summer, but on the thirtieth, it's all over and I go back home." He leaned in again to kiss me, but I turned my head and he hit my cheek.

"So I was just a… summer fling?" I asked a tear forming in my eye. He leaned in again, blowing a puff of air into my ear.

"You bet…" He said. I finally let my better senses take over. I put both hands against his chest and shoved him back, turned and opened the door.

"Kai… it doesn't work that way with me. Goodbye…" The tears started to choke back the words. Just as half my body had stepped out, I felt his large hand reach out and pinch itself around my wrist. It harshly yanked me back and I was slammed up against the wall, the door loudly slamming. My eyes grew big, and my heart started to beat faster. I was scared.

"Kai... what the hell are you doing?" I asked, my breaths becoming shorter and faster. He walked toward me until he was about a foot from my face.

"You're not going anywhere," He said. He grabbed my wrists and pinned them against the wall. I tried to pull them away, but he was too strong. I twisted and kicked until my wrists were sore, but he had his whole body pushed up against mine. I wanted to scream, but I didn't have enough breath in my lungs. He leaned back and took both my wrists in one hand, then with the other, pulled violently on my shirt until it ripped right down the middle. The air had finally filtered back into my lungs, and I screamed with all the power I had in me.

He whipped me around and held my back up against his chest, twisting my wrists painfully behind me. The tears were now streaming from my eyes as I attempted to scream again, but his hand had wrapped itself around my mouth and pulled my head back. He tied a gag, which I was assuming was his bandana, and still held my hands in his. He had me back first against his chest, his legs positioned so that mine could not move. I was helpless.

"You're not going anywhere. You're just a dirty whore, and that's all you're good for," He hissed. I could feel his hand drop from my neck to my waist, slithering its way up my side, sending a tingle of fear with every rib it passed. It rubbed my arm, sending goose bumps up and down my bicep, and then stopped at my shoulder. It moved its way down and groped my breasts. I let out a scream, but it was muffled by the gag. I attempted to drop to the floor, but he held me too tightly. Eventually he stopped, but then his hand dropped to the button of my pants. I couldn't' let him do this… I just couldn't…

I violently whipped my head backwards hitting his square in the nose. I heard him let out a groan and he violently pushed my away from his body, sending me flying up against the wall, collapsing upon the ground. I turned around quickly, and struggled to my feet, ripping the gag from my mouth. He started to walk toward me again, the blood dripping from his nose.

"You little bitch," he said, wiping the blood from his face. I threw a punch at him, but his hand caught my arm and twisted it violently. He grabbed the other wrist and held it up in the air. I had one more chance open to me, and I took it. I threw my knee up, hitting it right where it hurts. He threw my wrists down and collapsed on the ground. This was my chance. I quickly grabbed my coat and wrapped it around my half naked body and ran out the door. I had finally escaped that room… I finally escaped from him. I let it all out, the tears streaming from my eyes, and the wails finally escaping from my lungs. I ran down the stairs, slipping on the last step and banging right into Karen. She turned toward me and looked me right in the eyes.

"Jen... Jen what's wrong!" she said. I pushed past her and ran to the door, hitting many people along the way, but it seemed that everyone just went on dancing. I finally made it to the front door, but it opened before I got there. I slammed right into the figure that walked into the room. It wrapped its arms around me and held me tightly in its grasp. I tried to get away, but it held me there.

"Jen wait...it's me Cliff," the voice said, lifting me head to see his face. It was Cliff… it was. I looked up at him, the tears still choking back my words.

"Cliff, I'm sorry… I'm so sorry. You were right, about everything… Kai... he… he…" I broke down. I collapsed into his arms and clenched his coat tightly in my fists. I wanted to hold on to him forever, but I couldn't. I pushed past him and ran out the door. He grabbed my wrists gently and tried to pull me back to him. I wanted to go back, I really did.

"Cliff… I have to go… I have to get away from here" I said to him.

"But where are you going? Back to the house? What happened, maybe I can help you?"

"You can't help me… not now. I have to go…" I said pulling away from him. Before I left I pulled the shell necklace from my neck and shoved it into his hand. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew I was not coming back... ever…