First person point of view from David! Short but necessary.
My Decision
Sometimes I want to just yell at Kathryn that she doesn't understand the slightest thing about me, or why I act the way I do. I almost did last night when she was lecturing me about my responsibilities.
Why didn't I? Simple.
She's right.
It is unbelievably hard admitting that to myself. I try and deny it, but it is of no use. That is why I didn't counter anything Kathryn said.
Well, that and the fact that, if I told her that she didn't understand, she would just tell me that it was my own fault because I wouldn't tell her anyway.
Which was also true.
Either way you look at it, it was better to keep my mouth shut.
But now I have to decide what to do. I know it is time for something to change, but…how? What?
Kathryn wants me to fully support Courtney. I can't do that. I can't give her my complete blessing to join a world that might end up hurting her as badly as it did me. And if anything does happen to Courtney…if she gets hurt…they will be sorry.
My secretary interrupts my thoughts as she hands me the list of appointments for tomorrow. I thank her absently and leave work. I walk slowly to the park where I have become accustomed to waiting for owls from Courtney. Sure enough, five minutes after I arrive, I see Rex soaring towards me. He lands on my shoulder and presents the latest letter for Harry Potter to me. In turn, I provide him with some crumbs and he hoots appreciatively and flies away. I sit down at the picnic table to read the letter.
When I finish, I almost wish I had not read it. Irony is the constant companion in my life it seems. I never expected Courtney to write to me, as Harry, and ask advice about me, as her father. I look back at her words and a deep sigh escapes me. I sure am one to talk about others hurting Courtney when I have hurt her so much myself.
She didn't know what to say to her father so she wrote to Harry Potter.
Great, now my decision is that much harder.
~~**~~
It has been a day and I am still unsure of what to so. Thankfully, Kathryn senses that I am re-evaluating things and does not push me at the moment, though if I take too long I know she will.
I need to figure this out.
I know Kathryn is right and I need to fulfill my responsibility as a father. I know Courtney is hurting. I know I love both Kathryn and Courtney and I hate myself for hurting both of them. I know that Michael is confused-in his eyes his mother loves his sister and his father does not and he doesn't know what to feel.
I will not reveal my past. I cannot, I refuse to. It is not necessary. Bringing up that will not help. It is in the past, it is finished, I have left it behind long ago.
Somehow, I must resolve this conflict.
~~**~~
I asked one of the neighbors to watch Michael for the night so Kathryn and I could talk. We sat down in the living room and she looked at me expectantly. I can't meet her eyes.
"I know you are right Kathryn. I know I have a responsibility, I know I have left you too much to handle by yourself. I can't give you my reasons, but…I will change Kathryn. I will do better, I will show Courtney my support."
There is a moment of silence and then Kathryn says, "Will you really be supporting her?"
I hesitate, contemplating a lie, but…no, I will not lie. I shake my head slowly and answer, "I am trying, I am doing what I can, but we both know that change is a slow process. However, I will not let Courtney suffer any longer simply because I am squeamish. For all intents and purposes I will fully support her. Perhaps in pretending it will become true faster."
I dare to look at Kathryn. Her lips are pursed and she does not look happy, but I can tell she also realizes that this is the best she'll get.
"Very well David, you can start now, by discussing Courtney's recent business acquisition."
I think for a moment then I answer, "I believe it is best if we let her keep it. Someone has been very generous to her, who am I to stop her from enjoying a friendship she has cultivated? If it causes problems in the future, we can simply revoke our approval until she reaches the age of majority."
A small smile graces Kathryn's face and I realize that I just passed her test-whether I would truly try or not.
Now I simply wonder how to convince Courtney that I am genuine, without having to answer her questions as to why I acted the way I did. I would be playing the epitome of the Muggle-born's father, but the hardest person to convince would be my own daughter.
A/N:
He he he! No he has not told Kathryn! *grins evilly* Next chapter should be up within a week. Sorry things are taking a little longer-my mind keeps writing future scenes without wanting to compose the connecting material…. (For example-last night while I was trying to write this all that would come to my head was a scene between Albus and David in which Albus confesses he knows David's true identity and the scene as is would make no sense to anyone besides me.)
Anyway, I am sorry this was so short, I just hope it clears up some things.
If you still are confused, Harry is not confessing to Courtney or Kathryn because he has tried his hardest to bury it. He does not realize it, but he is partially justifying not telling about his past by the fact that Harry Potter writes to Courtney and tells her everything. If he did not do that, it would be more apparent to him that he really should tell his family the truth.