A/n: DRUNKEN LANDLORD: Thanks for your review. I found the lyrics to 'Mickey'. I don't think it would fit in with the story as it's going to develop, but it would certainly have fitted nicely.

Cow as White as Milk: Thanks.

I love Severus and Sirius: I do plan on finishing this, and already have most of it planned out in my head. I love your name, by the way. Couldn't agree with it more ;)

sweetytwety013: Thanks.

Constructive criticism is very much appreciated, so please review!

Disclaimer: Everything except the plot still belongs to the one and only J.K. Rowling.

Unexpected feelings – 5

How come the answers you have pondered, desperately searched for so long, always seem to make things even more difficult and raise even more questions?

Hermione was sitting in her room, trying to read, but not seeing a single of the words in her book. Ever since her conversation with Ginny four days earlier, she had not been able to keep her mind from returning to the Potions Master. In fact, he was just about the only thing she thought about.

His deep voice, so often associated with sneering, but for her also with pleasant conversations and a rare laughter.

Delicate hands, slightly calloused, but also seeming to be very sensitive. Perfect for a Potions Master.

Obsidian eyes that reminded her of an endless, dark lake, at times sinister and foreboding, at others glowing with a hidden passion.. And sometimes with something akin to.. sadness.

No, that's not the right word.. It's more like.. a melancholy wish for something, something unattainable.

She was extremely embarrassed when she realized how obsessive she had become.

I can't keep my mind of him! He is my teacher, dammit!

In the last couple of days she was seeking solitude more and more, trying to clear out the confusing thoughts swarming her, trying to figure out her own feelings and reactions. But the more she wondered, the more she perplexed herself. Finally she gave up on constantly controlling and holding back her thoughts, only trying not to let herself be distracted around her friends.

She suddenly remembered that the next appointment would be held in his private laboratory.

I'm going to be completely on his territory. Even though the classroom would also be considered his domain, this it different. More intimate.

Then she remembered that she had told him to call her by her first name, and received permission to do the same in return..

Exasperatedly she threw her book down and got up from the bed. Pacing in front of her window she forced her mind on the Arithmancy essay she had to write. It worked for several minutes, but her mind inevitably returned to the same person. Frustrated she threw herself on the bed.

The face of Professor Snape-

No, Severus...

-drifted in front of her eyes.. He was smiling at her, an unusual sight that made him look at least ten years younger and something she had only seen on few occasions.. Him working on a potion, looking very concentrated while she was watching him, mesmerized with the elegant movements of his hands.. His dark eyes looking into into her very soul as he leaned forward, about to kiss her..

A sharp knocking startled her and she sat up on her bed, completely disorientated. The vision of the Potions Master about to kiss her was very vivid in her mind when she realized that she had been sleeping, that it was only a dream. An odd feeling of.. disappointment filled her, as she got up and walked to the door.

Outside stood Ron.

"Oh, hi Ron. What is it?", she asked, somewhat surprised at his presence.

"Hi, Hermione.. I, erh.. I just thought you'd like to get some dinner, you've been up here all day.". His ears were slightly red, and Hermione felt a small pang of sympathy, mixed with annoyance.

If he's that uncomfortable around me, why doesn't he just say so?

"I am actually quite starved, I'll just be second.". She walked into her bathroom to freshen up a bit. Just because she saw no need to obsess about her appearance, it did not mean that she felt like going to dinner while looking like she had just woken up, even if it was the case.

When she returned Ron was nervously awaiting her. Frowning, Hermione asked: "Are you alright, Ron?".

"Yeah.. Well, no.. I... I'm really, really sorry, Hermione! Please forgive me!", he blurted out, his eyes pleading. Hermione stared at him, dumbfounded.

This wasn't exactly what I expected.. But I should forgive him, for the sake of our friendship if nothing else.

She opened her mouth to tell him that everything was alright, that she forgave him. But no words would come. She couldn't get herself to say those words to him, and for every second that passed, Ron looked more and more desperate. Finally she forced the words out: "I do forgive you.".

He jumped up, obviously relieved, and nearly dragged her from the room while he talked excitedly about the next Quidditch match beside her, but Hermione didn't pay attention.

Did I really mean that, or was it a lie?

Despite her attempts at pushing the answer to her own question out of her mind, she couldn't. She knew she had not meant a single one of her words, and she couldn't figure out why she had lied, why she had felt that she had to lie. Feeling increasingly miserable she followed her friends to dinner, watching them as they were talking animatedly.

Now everything's back to the way it used to be. But I feel different. Very different, and I'm not sure any of them realize that..

Sitting in Remus Lupin's office with a cup of tea, Severus realized that he had made a mistake.

He had simply come to deliver the latest batch of Wolsbane Potion, and had not expected Lupin insisting that he join him for a bit of tea. Despite his best efforts to dissuade his colleague, Severus had finally given in and accepted the offer, hoping that it would at least help to keep Lupin from making 'subtle' inquiries about his assistant.

It did not stop Lupin.

Hermione Granger and her work as Severus' assistant was, in fact, the only thing they had talked about, and Severus patience was wearing thin.

"I've noticed that Ms. Granger spends a considerable amount of time on her duties as your assistant, Severus. Are you sure she can keep up with her homework?". Lupin's voice was concerned, and Severus felt a twinge of annoyance.

She's not been reduced to a complete idiot, she has no problems in keeping up. Insufferable werewolf..

"Of course she can, last time I graded her homework she seemed to keep her usual standard very well, and I am certain that is the case in her other subjects.". His voice was carefully kept even.

"But what if it becomes too much for her? I don't think she would tell you, and what if the pressure becomes too much?".

Severus' patience was gone.

"She is not a weak, little first-year! Hermione can easily keep up, and I would notice if 'the pressure became too much'! Now, if you'll excuse me, I have better things to do!", he snapped and jumped out of the chair. In two long strides he was at the door, pulling it open when Lupin's voice sounded behind him.

"You called her Hermione.".

Severus froze in the doorway for a second before turning around, his voice completely gone.

Shit..

Lupin regarded him with an odd expression for a moment and then said: "I have never heard you call a student by their given name before.". His eyes narrowed slightly and something akin to a sly smile tugged at the corners of Lupin's mouth before he continued: "You're falling for her, aren't you?".

Severus' voice returned immediately: "I most am certainly not! I don't know what gave you that idea, Lupin, but it is not true!". There was nothing he wanted more than to escape from the office, but his legs refused to move.

The smile now spread on Lupin's face, making his eyes twinkle in a way oddly reminiscent of the Headmaster's eyes as he said: "I honestly didn't think I would ever see the day where Severus Snape fell in love with a student of his, especially not a Gryffindor student."

"I am not in love with her!". To his complete horror Severus felt a slight blush spread on his face and he turned around, determined not to let his colleague see the effect his words had on him. His fists were clenching and unclenched of their own accord while Severus struggled with his thoughts and emotions.

How could I be so careless, how could I loose my temper like this? No wonder I am under suspicion for being a spy, if I can't even keep my own feelings hidden. Damn that girl, she is completely messing up my life!

"As I said I have better things to do, so I'll bid you good day.". He took a step forward toward the door, but didn't reach it.

Lupin jumped up and was standing in front of Severus in a heartbeat. Severus took a step back unconsciously, surprised at how fast Lupin had reacted, and even more surprised when he saw the look on the other man's face. The slyness was gone and replaced by a cold and dire expression, eyes showing a wild, but controlled strength.

"You listen to me, Severus. To me it doesn't matter that you are a teacher and a student, as long as it makes you happy. But if you ever hurt her in any way, I promise you that you'll regret it.".

He is merely concerned for her safety, but does he really believe that I would do such a thing?

He forced his anger away before replying: "I would never hurt her. Never. And even if your.. insinuations were correct, do you really think that I would act on them? I could never be with a student, and I sincerely doubt that she would even consider being with someone like me.".

Without waiting for an answer Severus walked out of the room, deep in thought.

This is getting out of my control. If I cannot even keep this from Lupin of all people, there's no way I am going to be able to keep it from Hermione. Especially not when we will be in my private laboratory and on a first-name-basis. What the hell am I going to do?

When Hermione knocked on the door to the Potions classroom she was unusually nervous. The same thoughts kept returning.

Today is the day we'll be in his private laboratory. Why am I so nervous just because of that? It's not like I haven't ever been alone with him before, we've been alone many times-

A small voice at the back of her mind cut into her thoughts.

-Yeah, well, you've never called him Severus before.

His deep voice called out through the door: "Enter.". Sighing deeply to steady herself, Hermione pushed the door open and walked in.

"Good evening, Severus.".

His head snapped up and a strange expression-

Surprise? Wonder? Fear?

-flitted across it, before he said: "Good evening, Hermione.".

He got up from his chair and looked at her for a moment, apparently searching for words. Finally he gestured toward a door beside the blackboard and said: "The laboratory is through this door.".

Hermione couldn't help but notice how odd he seemed. It was almost as though he had lost the determinedness and certainty he usually had, and was instead deep in thought and unsure of how to act. She frowned slightly as she followed him into the laboratory, unable to figure out what could have caused this change in him.

They set to work s usual, and after a while it seemed that Severus had finally regained his composure. He worked as meticulously as always and Hermione couldn't help herself in observing him closely. How his hair fell across his face when he stirred the potion, the concentrated look in his dark eyes.

When they finished the nights work, Severus engaged in their conversation with the same ardor and enthusiasm as usual, this time a discussion about a book they had both recently read. Their conversation had been moved to Severus' office, a somewhat cluttered room, filled with papers and books, that was adjacent to his private laboratory.

Sitting in two plush, dark green armchairs in front of a pleasantly blazing fireplace, they spent quite a while discussing the book. Hermione sat pensive in thoughts for while afterwards, startled as Severus suddenly jumped to his feet.

"I nearly forgot.", he mumbled, hurrying through a door beside a shelf, a door Hermione only then noticed. He swiftly returned, carrying a large, leather bound book.

"I wanted you to read this. Remember our discussion about Truth serums and Jobberknoll feathers the other night, that was cut of because of the late hour? This book will be able to answer you questions more detailed, I believe. Would you care to read it?".

Hermione stared at him for a second.

He's never allowed me to borrow any of his books before..

"Yes, I would very much like to.". She smiled at him a bit tentatively, dazzled by his slightly strange behavior. Carefully holding on to the heavy book, she took it out of his hands. Their fingers touched for the briefest of moments, enough to send a pleasant shiver down her spine.

Get a hold of yourself! Don't begin thinking in that direction..

"I would appreciate it if you would stay here and read it, to ensure that no harm befell upon such an ancient book.", his voice was somewhat crisp, and it made Hermione's eyebrows raise in remonstrance.

Having read her expression correctly, he smiled a brief, amused smile, before saying: "I do not doubt that you would take good care of it, Hermione, but accidents occur to everyone, and especially when one is around a great number of people.".

Guess that makes sense.. But still..

"The information you seek is in chapter nineteen.". He sat back down, opening his own book, as Hermione settled herself more comfortably in the chair, placing the book tenderly on her lap and beginning to read. It was a fascinating book about rare potions ingredients and their origin, and it was written in a surprisingly captivating way. As soon as she had read through chapter nineteen, she flipped to the beginning of the book and starting reading again, completely forgetting where she was and the relative lateness of the hour.

Standing on the top of the Astronomy Tower looking down at the ground so far below, Hermione felt somewhat frightened. The blackness of the night was slowly creeping up around her, and she suddenly started as faint voices began whispering to her..

"Jump... just jump now... All will be well, just jump... jump..."

Shaking her head Hermione tried to step back, but the darkness was pressing against her, forcing her to instead step closer to the edge. Tendrils of the darkness was reaching up to her, hands that tried to drag her over the edge, panic welling up inside her as she desperately struggled against the pull of the darkness. She screamed, yelling for the overpowering darkness to leave her alone.

Hermione..

A figure suddenly appeared in front of her, bringing with it an odd sense of security. Stopping her furious fight against the now diminishing darkness, she instead focused on this figure in front of her. It slowly became clearer as the surroundings of the Tower melted away, giving in to a bright light.

Hermione..

The figure was now completely visible. Hermione stared, somewhat puzzled; Severus was standing in front of with a gentle smile.

"Do not worry, Hermione, I will always catch you.".

The surroundings began to blur again as her senses awakened.

"Hermione! Wake up!". A sharp intake of breath escaped her lips and Hermione gasped as her eyes snapped open, revealing the form of Severus Snape bending over the chair she was slumped in. Complete confusion overtook her for a second, before realization hit her; it was only a dream and she was now awake.

Looking up she saw the worry etched clearly into Severus' face, lining it deeply. He looked intently into her eyes as he said: "Are you alright? You were screaming in your sleep..".

"I.. It was.. only a nightmare.". Her voice trembled slightly, and she took a deep breath to steady herself.

His countenance softened as he took her also trembling hands into his. "Nightmares can be quite disturbing. It does not seem fair to put a word such as 'only' in connection with them.". He no longer looked at her, instead he stared unseeing at their hands, his eyes filled, for only a second, with intense fear and sorrow.

The sight made Hermione's heart twinge painfully.

What is going through his mind?

He stood abruptly, pulling his hands to himself. "I will get you something to drink.". He walked into his office and returned with a kettle. Placing it upon the dying embers, he magically filled it with water before starting up the fire again, all the while Hermione watching him with a frown. Surprisingly quickly the water was boiling and Hermione was handed a cup of tea.

Sipping the scalding liquid, Hermione felt calmer.

I must have fallen asleep..

"What time is it?", she asked after a while when she could no longer ignore Severus' silence. He looked up and frowned slightly before pulling a watch out of his pocket.

"It is half past three in the morning. I am afraid we both fell asleep while reading.". Hermione suddenly realized how pleasant his voice was when he was relaxed, and she shook her head to clear herself of the thought.

Instead she said: "I seem to have a tendency to do that.". Sighing deeply she continued: "I should probably get back to my room.". She put the empty teacup on the table beside her and stood up, wincing and grabbing hold of her chair when sharp pains stabbed at her back and shoulders.

That ought to teach me not to fall asleep in a chair!

"Are you alright?". Severus' voice was again concerned and she waved her hand dismissively. "Just a bit tense in back and shoulders, that's all. I really shouldn't sleep in chairs.", she grinned at him, but then grimaced as a sudden movement renewed the stab of pain.

"Sit down, Hermione.". He got up from his chair and walked over to her as she shook her head: "No, no, it will pass, it always does.".

"Sit down, Ms. Granger!". The sharpness of tone and the unexpected use of her last name made her comply without a thought, as she stared at him in surprise.

"Now, that's better. How often are you experiencing pain like this?", he demanded, his voice still somewhat sharp.

"Well, not that often, only if I've fallen asleep like this, in a chair.". She said uncertainly, a bit confused at his questions.

Why is he asking this?

A soft sigh escaped his lips and he looked at her sternly, his voice low and exasperated as he said: "For such a clever young woman, you do a poor job of taking care of your health. Such tension of your muscles should be dealt with, Hermione, not ignored.". He walked around the chair so he was standing behind her.

"Sit still, now.". A murmured charm and Hermione felt the back of the chair disappear.

What on earth is he up to??

She took a sharp intake of breath as she discovered what he had in mind. His hands were firmly massaging her shoulder and neck, finding all the sore spots and reducing the knots, easing the pain. Her eyes closed inadvertently, and all she could think of was how wonderful his hands felt on her tense body.

As his hands moved further down to her back, a deep sigh escaped her lips. Severus' chuckled almost silently behind her, but she didn't register it, so focused was her mind on the wondrous sensation of her muscles relaxing. His hands slid to her shoulders again, and without a thought Hermione leaned into his back, her eyes still closed.

Her eyes opened as she was gently pulled to a standing position, widening as he leaned toward her.

Their lips touched.

The fraction of second when their lips met seemed like an eternity and would forever be ingrained in Hermione's mind. Every detail of her surroundings was crystal clear as her lips met those of her Potions Master.

Uncertainty filled Hermione for a second, but his tentative lips seemed to whisk all though from her head as she gently leaned into him. Slowly the kiss deepened, and as she softly moaned his tongue slid out, meeting her own.

"No!". His voice was breathless as he suddenly pulled away, looking confused and angry at himself.

"Severus..". She took a step toward him, but he tumbled back, whispering: "Please leave.".

Confusion and hurt was written all over her face and invading her mind, and she didn't move. He closed his eyes and said, this time more firmly: "Please leave.". His breath was rapid, and Hermione slowly walked toward the door. A sharp pang of pain in her heart made her run the last couple of steps.

It was all a lie.

In her haste to leave she failed to notice the dark figure that hastily drew back from the doorway and into the shadows.

As she returned to her rooms she flung herself onto the bed, sobbing silently into her pillow. Clutching her blanket she cried herself to sleep.