A/n: Innogen: Thank you so much, I hope I can continue mastering it.
Cherdy the Molologist: Thanks. I hope you're still sane.
Lisa aka lord snapes lady: Thank you, I liked his reaction as well :) And about the cliffhangers –I can't help it. I really love them, and it was just the right place to break.
Vickie211: Thanks. Yes, this chapter starts from Severus' pov. I'm happy to know you agree with my decisions about cliffhangers and pov, I struggled a lot with the last chapter. To know it turned out okay is really nice.
Astaildiarfreak: Thanks.. I just love my cliffhangers.
sweetytweety013: Thanks.
Kathryn Black: Thank you.
Jessica: I don't really want to kill you, so here it is :)
A/n 2: Ljublima is supposed to be Russian and be equivalent to "darling", "honey", etc. Feel free to correct me if it's wrong.
Extra thanks to my music teacher for the Russian and to my friend, Kristina, for her constant support and advice.
Reviews are really great, you have no idea how happy and inspired they make me. So if you have constructive criticism, questions or just a comment, I would very much like to hear from you.
And a bit of shameless promotion: If you'd like to read an alternative, fluffy version of the Graduation Ball in chapter 8, I've put up a short story called "Lady in red".
Disclaimer: You can probably recite it in your sleep by now: J.K. Rowling owns just about everything. The only thing I can claim to be my own is the plot.
Unexpected feelings –10
Running into his office, Severus vehemently cursed himself as he placed wards on the room.
How the hell could I lose control like that?? Staring into her eyes, all those flashes..
A sickening wave of emotions and halves of memories came crashing over him, overwhelming him as it had just minutes earlier in the Great Hall, minutes before he had realized what was going on and had hurled himself through the door behind the High Table. Clutching the back of a chair to regain his balance, Severus gasped for breath and swore loudly at the nauseating spinning of his head and his faulting vision. Desperately trying not to think of the scene that had returned to his mind as he had looked into the eyes of Hermione Granger, he forced his breathing to become steady.
I do not have time for this! Get a grip, man!
Ignoring the bright memories reentering his mind, he stumbled to the fire place and grabbed a pinch of Floo powder. Taking a deep breath to steady his vision, he yelled: "House Common rooms!". Straightening his face into the usual scowl, he sneered at the many surprised students staring at his head suddenly appearing in their fire and said:
"All students are to remain in their Common room. Prefects will make sure no one leaves and will find out if anyone is missing. Report back as soon as possible, and start warding the Common rooms with the strongest spells you know.". No one moved. "Now!", he snarled in the most dangerous tone he had ever used on his students, and everyone he had in sight visibly jumped to do his bidding.
Why wont these memories just leave me alone??
Pulling his back out of the fire, he half-ran, half-strode, to his private Potions cabinet. Rummaging around few seconds, he finally found the bottle he was looking for and took it with him into his office at the same moment a Slytherin prefect appeared in his fire. "Professor. All students from 1st to 6th years are accounted for, except Graham Pritchard and Malcolm Baddock from 4th year. We do not know where they are. The wards are placed.", she said. Nodding curtly he said: "I will reinforce the wards in a couple of minutes.". The prefect inclined her head and withdrew herself.
Count on my Slytherins to be the fastest to respond..
A second later, the head of Ginny Weasley appeared: "Professor! The wards are placed, but we can't find Natalie McDonald from 4th year and Euan Abercrombie from 2nd, their friends say that Euan is in the library and that Natalie is taking a walk with Elenor Branstone from Hufflepuff.". Pausing to gasp for air, Ginny regarded him with an anxious expression and said: "Professor.. Do you know how the fight is going?".
What the -I really don't have time for this-
Ginny Weasley must have seen the annoyance on his face. Before he could utter a single word, she snapped: "Don't you even dare! I have just as much right to know as anyone else, if not more! Several of my friends and family members are out there, fighting, and I-".
"Shut up, you ignorant girl! I have no idea how-". A vivid image in his mind interrupted him, and he stumbled backwards.
-----Ginny suddenly stepped between them, taking Hermione by the arm and leading her away. Before she could take more than two steps, Severus was standing in front of them and grabbed Hermione's other arm.
"This has nothing to do with you, Ms. Weasley, so stay out of it!", he snapped in his best class room tone.
"On the contrary, Professor, she's my friend so it has everything to with me. And don't you think you've done enough already?", Ginny said in the coldest of voices. A collective gasp resounded from the crowd-----
"What the hell??", he gasped, trying to rid himself from the sudden memory. A strong pair of hands were leading him to a chair and he pulled away, realizing that Ginny had stepped through the fire to help him. "Sit down, you're still weak, it seems.", she mumbled. Snarling, he rounded on her. "What are you doing? I am perfectly capable of-".
A glare eerily reminiscent of one he had once received from the Headmaster stopped his protest, and he barely even realized that she had pushed him into the chair. Placing her hands on her hips, she hissed through clenched teeth: "Now, you listen to me, Professor. I don't give a damn about your authority over me, all rules are put aside in a time of war and this is war! Almost everyone I know are out there, risking their lives as we speak, and if I'm not allowed to join in the real battle, I bloody hell want to help where ever else I can! I cannot stand by and let you stumble around blindly, risking capture of some Death Eater sure to come barging through that door anytime! You are weak and apparently not capable of staying on your own two feet, so you better shut up and let me help you!".
The furious tirade left him speechless as she steadily continued glaring at him. Opening his mouth to say something, anything, he could not ignore the confusing amount of new information and memory crammed into his brain all at once and no words escaped his mouth.
At that moment, a bloodcurdling scream resonated off the walls just outside his office.
Chaos erupted throughout the Great Hall at the exact moment the Death Eaters streamed through the doors. Panic welling up her throat, Hermione screamed: "Follow me!", grabbed her parents by their sleeves and dragged them along as quickly as possible. The fear and complete confusion on their faces cut to her heart. Sending a silent prayer to whatever deity that might be listening, Hermione felt very thankful as she realized that all of the Muggle relatives of students had been seated close together.
The panicking non-magical people were clearly scared to death and hurriedly followed her. The Head Boy, Ernie Macmillan, suddenly appeared beside her, gasping: "Through that door!", and they hurtled forward. The racket of the many fighting people somehow hid them, and they managed to escape through the door behind the High table. "Colloportus!", Hermione gasped, following Ernie down the corridor, urging people forward, as he said: "We'll be safe in the dungeons!".
In a matter of mere minutes they had reached a large, unused class room close to the Potions section. As soon as people were inside, Hermione and Ernie frantically put up every ward they could think of and turned to face the silent crowd of anxious and fearful Muggle relatives of Hogwarts students. Drawing a deep breath, Hermione was able to steady her nerves and somewhat calmly regard the people.
"Darling.. Hermione.. What on earth is going on?", Catherine Granger asked, her usually steady and confident voice having an undercurrent of fear. "Yeah, what the hell is the meaning of this?", a red-nosed man spoke with an angry glint in his eyes. Other voices floated to her ears: "Who were those people in masks?", "What was that.. creature at the door?", "Why are we in here?".
Looking around at the many faces, Hermione opened her mouth to speak, interrupted as Ernie loudly said: "Hogwarts is under attack, and it is our duty, as Head Boy and Girl, to make certain that everyone unable to magically defend themselves are safe.".
A thick silence fell, broken when a small boy started to cry. "Who is attacking?", a woman asked. Glancing briefly at Ernie, Hermione said: "Voldemort.". Two or three of the assembled flinched, and Ernie gave a visible shudder. Most simply frowned or nodded absently. Ernie hurriedly explained the identity of the dark wizard, cut off as a strangled cry from a young woman at the back of the crowd. She pushed herself forward, tears welling up in her eyes as she said: "My daughter is gone! I –I thought she had run ahead of me, but I can't find her! She's not here, I'm sure, I've looked everywhere!".
Oh no.. If she is caught-
Before she could change her mind, Hermione hurriedly took down the wards and said to Ernie: "I'm going looking for her.". Ignoring the protests of her parents and Ernie, Hermione hurried out of the door and replaced the wards before running down the corridor, her heart beating wildly in her chest.
Coming to a halt at the end of the corridor, Hermione peered around the corner. It was empty, but a second later she heard two voices; Lucius Malfoy and someone else were coming hurriedly toward her and she pulled her head back.
No way to escape –I have to fight them-
"They ran this way, Draco saw them. Once they realize we have the girl-", the whimper of a child sounded, "-they will have no choice but to come out and fight.", Malfoy Sr. drawled, answered by a contemptuous laugh. Briefly closing her eyes and attempting to steady the wild tattoo of her heart, Hermione poised herself and held firmly on to her wand.
Any second now..
The second they rounded the corner, Hermione gave a vicious yell and kicked hard at the nearest and then screamed: "Stupefy!". Lucius Malfoy tumbled to the ground, dropping a girl of about five years old, and the other Death Eater fell groaning to his knees. Hermione recognized him as Antonin Dolohov and yelled: "Stup-". He threw himself at her and cut her off in mid-sentence, pulling out his own wand.
Struggling desperately against him, Hermione held on to her wand while trying to wrench Dolohov's away from him. The struggle was over quick and Hermione found herself pinned to the floor, her arms held over her head and her legs held in place by Dolohovs knees while he pointed his wand at her. Her own wand was lying three feet away. "So..", Dolohov sneered, "A little Mudblood decided to take on the big, bad Death Eaters, did she?". Emphasizing the last words, he spat her in the face and ignored her indignant curse.
"It wasn't too difficult to overpower you, bitch, I would have thought that your little lover had taught your better.". Hermione froze at his words, the color draining momentarily from her face. Dolohov laughed roughly and continued: "It seems that Severus has lost his touch, or maybe teaching you how to defend yourself wasn't on top of list of how to spend his time with you.". The anger returned full-force and Hermione opened her mouth to snarl the first insult that came to her mind, but was cut off as a loud crack came somewhere from behind her. Dolohov froze as a blue light enveloped him, and he fell to his side, landing beside Hermione with a thump.
Behind him stood the five year-old girl with Hermione's wand in her hand, staring wide-eyed at the fallen man and then bursting into tears as she dropped the wand on the floor. Hurrying to her feet, Hermione walked over to the girl and picked up her wand. "It's okay, don't worry.", she mumbled as the little girl flung her arms around her, and Hermione gave her a hug before taking her hand and rushing back toward the warded class room.
She fervently hoped to reach the class room before running into any more Death Eaters. The words of Dolohov still sounded in her ears, and she shivered of anger at the memory. Stopping in front of an old suit of armor, Hermione realized with a pang a panic that she had no idea where she was.
Shit! How the hell am I supposed to find that class room??
Forcing her breathing and her nerves to steady, she cast a wary look around her, hoping to find some clue as to which direction she should choose. Nothing caught her eyes, so she simply started walking, trying not to upset the little girl. Her breathing was far too loud in her ears and the slight clicking of her shoes send shivers down her spine as she determinedly walked forward, her wand held high and her eyes nervously darting back and forth in the hallway.
A shadow suddenly rushed past behind her and she whirled around, screamed and tried to duck as a spell was hurtled toward her, losing footing and hitting her head against the rough wooden floor.
"Stay here!", Severus snarled at Ginny Weasley and took of the wards, before slamming the door open and running into the corridor. At the end stood Draco Malfoy bent over an unconscious Hermione Granger, holding on to the front of her robes and snarling into her face: "How dare you stun my father, you whore??". Pointing his wand at the young man, Severus hissed: "Stupefy!", at the same moment as the red jet of Ginny's Stunner swished past him.
Draco collapsed on the floor and they hurried forward, Severus rushing to Hermione's side and swiftly lifted her of the floor as Ginny took a small girl, whom Severus had not noticed, by the hand and hurried her into the office. After gingerly having placed the unconscious young woman on his desk and levitated her attacker into the room, the Potions Master re-set the wards.
The flames behind him flared up and both he and Ginny swirled around with their wands held high, pointing them at a startled Ravenclaw prefect. "What??", Severus viciously snarled. "Ehm.. We aren't missing any students, Stewart Ackerly just returned. He's brought a couple of other students with him. Graham Pritchard and Malcolm Baddock from your House, sir, and a Gryffindor, Euan Abercrombie. Stewart said he'd seen Death Eaters in the halls and convinced the other students to come with him.", the prefect said, warily eying the wands pointed at him.
That means only the other Gryffindor and at least one Hufflepuff is still out there.
"Send the Slytherins and the Gryffindor through.", Severus said and stepped back as the students climbed through. They looked around nervously. Ignoring them, Severus thanked the Ravenclaw prefect and then sent the students to their respective Common rooms. A second after the young Gryffindor disappearing into the flames the head of a nervous Hufflepuff prefect appeared, instantly starting babbling: "We can't find Elenor Branstone, sir, everyone else is in place, but-". Cutting her of with an angry glare, Severus turned to Ginny.
"If you want to participate so much as you do, I suggest that you take this bottle-", he shoved the bottle he had earlier retrieved into her hands, "-and use it to reinforce the wards in the Common rooms. Take that young girl with you.". Turning around without waiting for a reply, Severus magically bound Draco Malfoy to a chair in front of the desk and began to examine Hermione.
A sudden wave of memories hit him again.
-----"...You know, they are right, no one wants to be with me..No one could ever love me.."
The tears were streaming down her cheeks, and Severus pulled her close to him, holding her tightly as she cried into his chest. His heart felt like it was shattering.
"That is not true, Hermione. You are an incredibly beautiful and intelligent young woman, one of the most talented witches in decades. Anyone who cannot see that is a fool and not worthy of your time. And you can be loved.. I know, because I do..", he mumbled.-----
Gasping, he clutched his desk. Ginny took hold of his arm without a word and steadied him, making him sit down in a chair. The rush of memory faded, and Severus took a deep breath. Glancing up at the student in front of him, he said in a voice that trembled slightly: "Go reinforce the wards.". She gave him a dubious look before leaving with the little girl, smiling kindly at the child.
What has gone on in the past six months?? I have told a student that I love her, and I have-
The memory that had caught him by surprise in the Great Hall rose up in his conscience again.
----- As his hands moved further down to her back, a deep sigh escaped her lips. He chuckled almost silently behind her. His hands slid to her shoulders again, and Hermione leaned into his back, her eyes still closed.
Her eyes opened as he gently pulled her to a standing position, widening as he leaned toward her.
Their lips touched.-----
"How could I do that??", he snarled, jumping to his feet and swearing loudly. "What the hell is she thinking of me- how could I-". A low moan behind him made him stop and he turned around. Hermione was attempting to sit up, her eyelids fluttering.
"Lay down, I still have not found out where you are injured.", he said, forcing his voice even. She slowly complied, whimpering a bit as her head met the surface of the desk. "Are you in any pain?". She nodded, grimacing as it obviously hurt. With a rasping voice, she said: "My.. The back of my head. And I think I've broken a rib.". Sliding his hand behind her head, he felt a small lump on the back. Performing a (concussion?) charm, he sighed a breath in relief. "You do not have a concussion.", he mumbled. Lifting his hand to check her ribs, he hesitated.
It would be best if I removed the clothing to examine her ribs... But.. What will she think if I do that?
Reason overpowered apprehension. Narrowing his eyes slightly, he said: "I have to remove some of your clothes, Hermione, to assess the injury.". She nodded weakly, allowing him to open her robes. She was wearing a buttoned shirt underneath. A tap with his wand left it unbuttoned and he gently pushed it aside.
A bruise was visible on her right side, and when he carefully placed his hand on the bruise. A sharp intake of breath from Hermione seemed to confirm the suspicion and he said to her: "You are right, a rib appears to be broken. I will fetch some potions to ease the pain and help you heal.". Another weak nod and he turned around to search his potions cabinet. Half-way out of the door Severus stopped. Shrugging his outer robe off his shoulders, he walked back and gently placed it over Hermione's bare stomach and cast a spell that would enable no one else than Ginny Weasley to enter through the fireplace.
It took him no more than a minute to find a bottle of Skele-gro, a potions against head ache and two beakers. Upon returning he saw Ginny stepping through the fire, casting Hermione a worried look and quietly asking: "Is she going to be alright?". Nodding curtly, Severus poured the potions into the beakers and asked: "Is the little girl alright?".
As he walked over to the desk Ginny said: "Yeah, Luna Lovegood's taking care of her. What are Hermione's injuries?". He answered Ginny's question, trying to ignore the fact that his head was spinning slightly, the many memories regained giving him a head ache. Looking down at the young woman in front of him, a saddened expression slipped over his face.
She looks so.. vulnerable.. Why is she always hurt, in one way or another?
Suddenly realizing the direction his thoughts were taking, he scowled at them. Slipping his hand behind Hermione's head, he raised it slightly to pour the Skele-gro into her mouth. Waiting for the potion to wait, he held on to her.
A gasp escaped Hermione's lips and she opened her eyes, trying to sit up. "No, no, stay down.", he said, "It is better if you relax. Does your head still hurt?". She nodded, looking around her with slightly confused eyes. In a hoarse voice she asked: "What..happened?".
"We don't know for sure, we found Malfoy leaning over you in the hallway.", Ginny said from behind him. She had walked closer without Severus noticing. Grabbing the other beaker, he held it out to Hermione, and said: "Against the head ache. It will also make you fall asleep.", as she raised an inquisitive brow. She regarded it for a couple of seconds, then allowed him to pour it into her mouth.
"Thank you.", she murmured, slipping back into the realm of dreams.
She was lying on something soft, enveloped by something warm.
Where am I? What on earth has happened?
Slowly opening her eyes, Hermione found herself staring into a fireplace. Looking around her, she saw that she was lying on a sofa. Large bookcases were standing on either side of the fireplace. She recognized the room as the one next to Severus office. Slowly maneuvering herself into a sitting position, she realized that she was covered by a robe, and then tried to remember what had happened. Fuzzy recollections swarmed her mind and she closed her eyes, getting a hold of the memories a little by little.
Death Eaters in the Great Hall.. Warding the unused class room.. Attacking Lucius Malfoy and Dolohov.. Draco Malfoy shooting a curse at me.. Severus opening my shirt..
Her eyes snapped open as she remembered. Gooseflesh rose on her arms at the thought of his delicate hands on her skin, and she jumped up from the sofa, cursing at herself under her breath as she started pacing in front of the fireplace.
It is no good to dwell on that thought, no good at all. Not when he doesn't remember anything-
Freezing on the spot, the mental image of Severus staring into her eyes during the ceremony appeared in her mind. He had remembered something, she was certain, the question was what he had remembered-
A sudden roar from behind a door startled her, and in three quick strides she was wrenching it open, her wand held out in front of her. The scene in front of her eyes utterly stunned her, and she simply stared as the events in Severus' office unfolded in front of her eyes.
The Potions Master had one hand around the throat of Draco Malfoy, his wand in the other hand and pointing straight at the shocked young man's face, while said young man gasped for breath. Severus' features was contorted in rage, a rage so fierce and savage that it froze the blood in her veins. Behind him stood Ginny, calmly pointing her wand at Malfoy's chest and making no move to free Malfoy from the strangling hold.
"What's going on?", Hermione asked, a bit uncertain of whether she really wanted to know. Shooting her a quick glance, Severus said: "I am glad to see you are awake.". He still did not release his grip. Ginny smiled briefly and waved her over. "We're just getting a few answers from this little piece of shit, that's all. Not to worry, we wont kill him. Just make him suffer a bit.".
The confusion swarming her mind, Hermione walked cautiously over to stand beside Ginny. A few seconds where no other sound than Draco's sputtering for air was heard passed, and then Hermione said: "If you really don't want to kill him, you might want to let go of his throat. He's not going to be able to breathe unless you do so.".
Finally letting go, Severus took a step back, still aiming his wand at Draco Malfoy, as the young man fell to the floor, gasping and rubbing his throat. In a low voice Severus mumbled: "Stupefy.", levitated the unconscious Malfoy to a chair and then turning around.
The fierce expression was replaced with one of worry, and he quickly took a step closer to her. Gently taking hold of her jaw, Severus tilted her head upwards and gazed into her eyes. Grabbing her wrist with his other hand, he found her pulse with his fingers. Hermione barely dared to move. The expression in his obsidian eyes was so genuinely caring and concerned, not one trace of pity or contempt was present, that she could only stare at him; feeling completely entranced.
Taking a step back, Severus let go of her wrist and her jaw, averting his eyes. An odd feeling spread in her; it took her a moment to realize that it was disappointment. She was disappointed that he had let go. "It seems all your injuries are healed.". His voice was low and tense.
Ginny cleared her throat and took a step forward. "Maybe we should go into to the other room..?". Not waiting for a reply, Ginny seized her arm and lead her back through the door. Forcing her to sit on the sofa, Ginny conjured a cup of tea for the both of them and asked: "How much do you remember?".
Frowning, Hermione answered: "I remember more or less everything. The attack, getting ambushed by Malfoy and.. I guess he knocked me out. Next thing I remember is waking up and getting a potion from Severus, and then I woke up in here.".
Ginny nodded and stared into her cup, looking as if she was trying to find the right words to say something difficult. After a short moment she put the cup down and looked determinedly at Hermione. "Remember that AMD-association? The one that claimed to be against moral decay?".
"Yes.. The one that took that picture of.. me and Severus.".
"That's the one. After we found you in the hallway, Snape forced Draco to take Veritaserum. It turns out that it was Malfoy behind everything. He's the one who's been spying on Snape and who took that picture, the association was just something he made up. Malfoy has also helped the Death Eaters get into Hogwarts, making them Portkeys that somehow allowed them to get onto the grounds.", Ginny said, a distasteful sneer on her face at the thought of Draco Malfoy.
But Hermione's thoughts were somewhere else.
He knows.. Severus knows.. That's why he was angry-
"Hermione?". Ginny's voice cut through her thoughts and she looked up., mumbling: "What?".
"Are you okay? You're really pale-".
Hermione got to her feet, unable to stop herself from trembling slightly. "That was why he was so angry.. It wasn't about Draco Malfoy, it was about me, it was because he was repulsed by me -I should have known -I have to get out of here, I- Besides, my parents are probably worried-". Jumping forward, she tried to reach the door, intercepted as Ginny grabbed her arms and held her back.
"No –let go of me, I can't stay here!", Hermione yelled, surprised at the slightly hysteric edge to her own voice. Ginny held on tighter, staring at her with an alarmed look and said: "Hermione, you can't go out there, into the middle of the battle –you'd never make it! You can find your parents later, they'll be alright, but you can't go now-"
No.. Why the hell am I so weak?? Why-
Ripping her arm out of the grip of her friend, Hermione staggered backwards and cursed at the tears beginning to roll down her cheeks. Collapsing on the floor, she burried her head in her hands and started sobbing, without really knowing why. She barely even noticed Ginny talking to her and trying to get her of the floor, and didn't move until a strong pair of arms embraced her and held her tight while she buried her head in a white linen shirt.
When he heard a yell from the other room, Severus immediately assumed the worst; that Death Eaters had somehow gained access to the room and was attacking the two young women. The sight that met him when he ripped the door open therefore surprised him.
Hermione was lying on the floor, crying heavily, while Ginny was trying to soothe her. Severus quickly walked over to them and pulled Hermione into his arms, lightly stroking her back and mumbling: "Just let it all out, ljublima, cry the tears you need...". She held on to his shirt, almost compulsively, and sobbed heartbreakingly.
It must be me.. It is all because of me.. The only things I can give to others are fear and hatred, heartbreak and derision...
Closing his eyes he mentally cursed himself. Hearing Draco Malfoy's confession had brought back another stream of memories, in particular the look of hurt on Hermione's face after he had first kissed her and then pushed her away, after he had forced himself on her. It was now haunting his mind more ferociously than any other memory he had regained.
Holding Hermione even tighter, he continued mumbling in her ears. Soft and gentle words he didn't even know he was capable of speaking, were flowing from his lips as was it the most natural thing in the world for him. Realization suddenly hit him; he no longer cared what others might think, no longer cared that Ginny Weasley was looking at him with eyes that could only be described as surprised and shrewd, no longer cared that a war was raging mere meters from them. The only thing that mattered was Hermione and that he had hurt her.
How could I ever do such a thing to her? How could I hurt her without realizing the damage it would do? How could I? I do not deserve her, I never have and never will.. I can never go near her again, never...
Her tears slowly diminished as her breathing became heavier, indicating that she was falling asleep. He reluctantly let go of her and stood, looking down at the small figure asleep on the floor for a moment before levitating her to the sofa. Without a word, he exited the room. Leaning against the door he had just closed, he took a deep breath. A sardonic smile suddenly creased his lips.
How is that I, Severus Snape, have suddenly started caring, even having feelings, about one of my students? I really must be an old fool to ever have begun having these thoughts, to pretend I could ever feel a thing as that. I am not capable of such feeling.
The small voice at the back of his mind was ignored. The small voice that told him how much of a lie that sentiment was.
Hermione opened her eyes and stared into a fireplace. The scene seemed vaguely familiar, and she realized that she had woken up in a similar manner not that long ago. Remembering the events that had followed after her latest awakening made her blush, and she sat up, frowning and chewing her bottom lip.
Why is that I always break whenever I need to be strong? Am I really that weak, am I not as strong as I think I am? Was Dumbledore right when he said that I couldn't handle this fight?
Her mind swarming with thoughts, she sat on the sofa until Ginny slipped through the door and gave her a somewhat tense smile. Sitting down beside her, Ginny stared into the fire for a little moment and then spoke: "How do you think the fight is going?".
Not knowing what to say, Hermione shrugged. It felt odd to be away from the battle when her friends and professors were out there, risking their lives. "It's rather ironic, don't you think?", she suddenly asked. Frowning, Ginny asked: "What do you mean?".
"I've always thought that I would be in the middle of the fight, you know, being Harry's friend and all-", she said, interrupted by Ginny's mumble: "And occasionally his brain as well..". Smiling briefly, Hermione continued: "But here I am, sitting with you in front of a fire in Severus Snape's rooms, waiting for everyone else to do the work. Waiting to see whether we'll live or not.".
"Hermione..", Ginny began, but Hermione shook her head, not wanting to hear what she had to say. "Don't, Ginny. You know that's what were waiting for, and I'm sure you know how.. wrong it feels for me. It must be the same for you. We can only wait to see whether our friends and family die or not.".
Staring into the fire, neither of them spoke for a while. Ginny finally cleared her throat and said: "As much as I want to be out there, I know we're not going to be able to. And you're right, all we can do is wait. Wait and hope.". A small smirk suddenly crept over her face. "If we make it out of here, I'm going to have a horrible 7th year in Potions. I must have yelled at Snape at least five times today, last time as recently as half an hour ago.". At Hermione's confused expression she explained: "He tried to leave. I told him I'd put a Bat-Bogey Hex on him if he tried, and then I put up additional wards on the door and the fireplace. He wont be able to lift them; only the one who cast them can.".
Hermione shook her head, smiling.
Trust Ginny to do something like that...
-
The hours passed only slowly. Staring into the fireplace, neither Hermione nor Ginny said much, only occasionally did they exchange a few words. Snape stayed in the other room, only revealing his presence by a muffled sound of footsteps every once in a while and by almost constantly being in Hermione's mind.
The images and thoughts in her mind consisted of speculations about either the battle or the Potions Master. She was so lost in thought that she barely even noticed when Ginny jumped to her feet after a few hours, staring at the door. Getting to her feet, Hermione heard voices coming from the other side. Severus' deep baritone and another, a kind voice –Professor Dumbledore.
As one, the two young women jumped forward and pulled the door open. The Headmaster turned his head in the fireplace, and Severus' gave them an unreadable look. Her heart skipping a beat, Hermione breathed: "Have we won?". A short silence fell before the Headmaster said: "The Death Eaters have left Hogwarts, but-". Not hearing him out, Ginny and Hermione shrieked and hugged each other. Only then realizing that Dumbledore had been about to say something else, Hermione looked at him again, rooted to the spot when she realized that the usual twinkle in his eyes were gone. Feeling her face drain of color, she swallowed, then asked: "There were.. casualties?".
The silence was almost painful. Finally, Dumbledore said, in a sad voice: "Yes. We lost Professor Vector, Megan Jones from Hufflepuff, Dean Thomas from your own house and.. Ms. Weasley, I am sorry. Your brother, Charlie, was killed as well.".
Ginny stared at Dumbledore, unable to say anything. Tears were beginning to stream down her cheeks, a small whimper escaping her mouth. Pulling her into a hug, Hermione whispered: "I'm so sorry.". Taking a couple of deep breaths, Ginny got control of herself and pulled away. With a voice only slightly wavering, she asked: "Are there anyone injured?". Nodding slowly, the Headmaster seemed to consider whether or not to tell them.
A deep voice from behind them said: "It seems the Death Eaters were deliberately going after people close to Mr. Potter. Lupin and Ronald Weasley are both in the Infirmary, seriously injured. And Mr. Potter himself-".
"Severus!". Dumbledore's sharp voice interrupted, the warning in his eyes prominent. Fixing the Headmaster with a steady look, Severus said in a controlled voice: "They deserve to know. We have avoided their interference in the battle, but they at least have a right to know the truth.". Completely taken aback by the unusual statement from Severus, Hermione looked back at Dumbledore. Several tense moments passed, the Headmaster and the Potions Master steadily regarding each other. Finally, Dumbledore sighed and turned his head to look at them.
"I suppose you are right, Severus. Ms. Weasley, Ms. Granger, I am sorry to tell you this, but Harry is missing. The Death Eaters kidnapped him.".
To be continued...