I don't own them but a girl can dream

Marco's POV

She doesn't live. She merely exists. I want to protect her. I want to save her from her demons but I can't. No one can save someone from themselves. She's still beautiful not even heartbreak and despair can change that but her beauty is no longer dangerous and exotic it's no longer as obvious as it once was. Now it's simply sad and dark like a car crash you can't take your eyes of. You know you shouldn't be witnessing someone's undoing but you can't stop watching because you might miss something important. She drifts from day to day no longer feeling or affecting anything. She is simply a by stander in her own life.

She stands in the mirror pretending to care what she looks like. She always putting on a show for Paige and I. She pretends so we don't nag and bug her to resume some semblance of normal. She goes to all the parties and hangs out with all the people but she doesn't participate. She's just apart of it like a chair or a picture that hang on the wall. I think the biggest tragedy is she lost her fire the one that attracted Sean to her to begin with. She lost what made her the amazing person she was. She will never be happy again and that hurts more then if this had all happened to me personally.

Her cell phone begins playing "material girl" by Madonna. A ghost of a smile lights her phone only for a second and I can almost see the Manny that we all knew and love but when that second was up all I could see was Manny's doppelganger, the girl that wore her face but wasn't really her. She put on the fakes smile I had ever witnessed and answered the phone "hey Paige" she says in a sugary sweet voice that could give me diabetes " yeah, we'll be waiting out front for you". She glanced once more in the mirror/. Satisfied that she had the appropriate amount of black on because that is all she wore now or days in less it was the bright pink fedora Sean gave her or the red skirt with the black tank top which was his favorite. It was like when he died all the colors in her world went with him. I know he would have wanted more then this for her but she refuses to hear me yeah she listens but she doesn't really here me. She just shrugs it off with " I knows" and "I am fines". She jars me from my thoughts by grabbing my hand and pulling me down the stairs.

Paige and a newly home form college Dylan pull up to my house. Manny and I get in the car.

"How are you" Dylan asks her with a small half smile and a concerned look. "I am fine" she answers like she delivering lines to a play they sound rehearsed and unrealistic. The ride to school was uneventful and quite. Everyone was nervously glancing at Manny like she would shatter into a million pieces or burst into tears any second. Manny listlessly stares out the window and things only she really sees. We passed a certain street that I had never been on but as we did I saw her wince and breathe deep trying to damn the tears. She stopped all but one, which made a slow sad descent down her cheek and chin slowly crawling down her throat and to the collar of her black button up shirt. She reminded me of a broken porcelain doll that no one bothered to fix. I wanted to pull her close to me and shelter her form it all. The girl had done and seen too much for such and young age and that single tear made me want to fix it all with a wave of my hand if I could. I loved this girl like a sister I never had and I never wanted any of my family to hurt. She would never allow me to help her like that though because then she have to admit that her emotions where over powering her and in doing that she'd have to admit that she wasn't handling this as well as she wanted to be. She wasn't fooling us either way but we let her go on with her charade because it made her feel strong and when she finally let go she would need that strength to survive the after shock.

"So this weekend there is this rave in this abandon warehouse right outside of town are you all in " Dylan asked but he was looking at Manny when he spoke the words. She looked like she was going to decline so Paige and I both spoke up together "we'll all be there." We were both hoping that maybe this would be the one that would allow her to let go and live for once. She shot us both an angry look but smiled at Dylan and whispered "sounds like fun" which sound about as believable as soap opera tears.

The three of us got out of the car and walked towards the degrassi doors. As we entered the doors the whispers began. One small fat mousy looking girl spoke up like she had some divine right to speak to us. "That's the girl that had her boy toy shot and tried to get sympathy by holding a ceremony and acting all upset about it. She is and always will be a deceitful slut." I moved to yell at the girl Manny put her hand up in front of me and stopped me. I saw her fire return to her eyes and anger racked her entire body. She moved towards the girl her movements were purposeful and deadly. Was I this little girl I would be shaking in my ugly orange high tops. "Excuse me do I even know you" the girl shock her head afraid to speak. "I didn't think so thought you'd get noticed by insulting the girl with the dead boy friend?" she yelled. If looks could kill this girl would have died and come back and died again or been burnt to ashes by the heat of Manny's angry gaze. "Have you ever watched anyone you love die you stupid bitch?" again the girl shock her head she began to get smaller like the amazing shrinking woman. "Then you have no idea what it's like to watch the love of your life slowly die and hear his last words about how much he loves you. You have no clue what I'd give to have him here with me. You've never known what it likes to not understand why he can't just be alive again. Why he can't hold you or kiss you. You haven't the slightest clue what it entails to get up every morning hoping that you'll see him or hear from him or hell even get a message from him. But you don't and then you realize why you won't because he's dead. He won't be doing any of those things ever again." As Manny spoke I could see more and more of the old her and I knew I should stop this but I was in awe of how beautiful and powerful she looked at that moment. I was so entranced by it that all I could do was stare. "You really shouldn't have strong opinion about things that you don't understand. No matter what I do or how long I live there will never be anything in my life that compares to what he was to me. You could live a thousand years and never have anyone that would die for you. Well, Sean would and did die for me and you my frumpy little attention whore aren't even fit to think his name let alone talk about him and what happened to him. I suggest from now on you keep your cat fish like lips closed when it comes to me and mine or I will rip them off and there will be no worries." She finished her speech and turned on her heals and walked away from the very scared girl without so much as a second glance.

When we got out of earshot of the girl Paige and I both exclaimed, "that was awesome. You told her." She then did something that surprised us both she smiled. This smile was real. The kind of smile that was contagious because it came from such a pure place you can't help but it get caught in it. I hoped that this was a turn around for her but that smile quickly faded and so did that illusive spark disappeared from her eyes and she was back to being Manny-bot.

"So when do what time do I meet you at your house for this party your dragging me to" she asked

"No, No baby we are meeting at your house so Paigey and I dress you for this and I order you to have a good time" I demanded. "You can't make me" she goaded and then stick her tongue out at me. It was time like these I could almost she the real her.

Almost

I am trying to figure where I want to go with this. If you hav eany ideas let me know. maybe manny and paige together. I got the next chapter written but after that I am lost.