This songfic is based on the song "If You Go Away" by Patricia Kaas.
If You Go Away
There was a distant echo of memory that struck past Marguerite, twirled in some distant ballroom and laughed with an adoring suitor. There was a wave that flickered from view just as she turned to look at it, a fire that burned with the intensity of a love she knew.
A knock came at the door, but Marguerite did not budge from her place by the window. Quietly it opened, and she closed her eyes at the creeping steps behind her.
"Why must you go?" she asked, and two hands grasped her shoulders. Percy looked on, watching the sun set with the last rays of freedom. Tomorrow he would once more become the Scarlet Pimpernel.
"You know why. There are many yet to be rescued, my dear Margot."
"I understand. Why have you come?"
"To bid my wife good-bye."
She turned around and he smiled down at her.
"Adieu."
There was a light that reflected in his lazy blue eyes, and Marguerite loved it more than all the world. She could not imagine life without it, or his laugh, his kindness, his love. Why had she fallen for the very hero all the ladies adored? How had she managed to wed him? Why did he have to go?
If you go away
On this summer day
Then you might as well
Take the sun away
All the birds that flew
In the summer sky
When our love was new
And our hearts were high
When the day was young
And the night was long
And the moon stood still
For the night birds song
If you go away
If you go away
If you go away…
He turned to leave the room, but Marguerite held fast.
"One more day, Percy. Please."
"M'dear, I've stayed a week. There have been hundreds killed for my lack of action. I cannot allow more to die."
"When do you leave?"
"Now, if you can spare me."
She sighed, and pulled herself up to him. The man's hands wrapped about her and they were locked in an embrace for an eternity, until another knock came at the door.
"Must you go?" she breathed into his chest.
"I must," he replied, and detached himself from her arms. Percy blessed her with a kiss, and then he was gone.
But if you stay
I'll make you a day
Like no day has been
Or will be again
Well sail the sun
Well ride on the rain
Well talk to the trees
Well worship the wind
And if you go
I'll understand
Leave me just enough love
To hold in my hand
If you go away
If you go away
If you go away…
She sat by the window again, watching his carriage ride off into the distance, not bothering to wipe the tears that streamed down her face. Every time he left, every time, she knew might be the last. What if they killed him? What if they caught him? Dismembered him and left him on English soil to rot away, and she would never feel his lips on hers again? She would never hear his voice nor laugh at his wit, nor would they ever hold the peace of each other's eyes.
Marguerite remembered the time when they had been estranged, locked away from one another by pride and hurt. When his blankness had filled her mind so entirely until her denial of love became adoration of such ferocity that she dared not deny its luminous existence.
If you go away
As I know you must
There'll be nothing left
In the world to trust
Just an empty room
Full of empty space
Like the empty look
I see on your face
I've been the shadow
Of your shadow
I felt you might have kept me
By your side
If you go away
If you go away…
She should have given him all her love, every last drop. She should have poured adoration upon him in such strength that he could not budge from her grasp. She could have kept him. She should have. Yet Marguerite knew that such greed was beyond her power. How could she keep love and let innocents die? Pride was a thing to be honoured, and desire sacrificed.
They would have laughed and walked about the river, conversing. They would remain silent by the oaks, gazing at the beauty around them. They would have walked about their estate, the gardens, breathed in the sweet aromas of blooming flowers. They would have been at peace with all around them, if only for a fleeting eternity.
But he would have been with her.
But if you stay
I'll make you a day
Like no day has been
Or will be again
We'll sail the sun
We'll ride on the rain
We'll talk to the trees
We'll worship the wind
And if you go I'll understand,
Leave me just enough love
To hold in my hand
If you go away
If you go away…
Marguerite stood and wiped the tears from her eyes, and seated herself at her table. There were books upon the shelves, but there was no literature that would calm her weeping heart. She needed nothing but Percy. This was an event she should have become accustomed to, with all of his travels out and about. But every time he left her, she could not laugh until his return. She ever worried, ever thought of him. There were tears ready to tear apart her mask of happiness at the smallest news. Marguerite took a pen and dipped it into the ink holder. On the empty parchment, in a neat hand, she spilled the five words that her heart screamed.
Et ne me quites pas...