CHAPTER 2- I DON'T MEAN TO POINT ANY FINGERS BUT IT WAS ALL THEIR FAULT
The next day, everyone was in a bad mood. It was likely that people would start beating the crap outta each other with their instruments but Mr. Reiderer came in before that could happen.
"Ok take out Into the Raging River," he said.
"I'd like to throw Andy into a Raging River," said one of the trombone players.
"Well I'd like you to burry yourself," said Andy. "That way you wouldn't keep screwing me up."
"Ok what is going on here?" asked Mike another bassoon player.
"Basically Andy got everyone mad and different sections declared war on each other," said Meghan. "The saxophones declared war on us and the bass clarinets."
Mike tried not to laugh.
"Dude I'm serious!" said Meghan.
"We wouldn't lay a finger on the Great Mike though," said a saxophone player.
"And why not?" Meghan asked him.
"Duh you're such an idiot. Of course you wouldn't know the great almighty Mike plays more than one instrument," said another saxophone player. "Mike is a saxophone god. We try to match our lowly playing to that of his phenomenal playing on a daily basis."
"Yeah and you're getting closer and closer every day," Meghan said sarcastically.
"Ok guys break it up," said Mike. "And only wind ensemble members are allowed to say phenomenal."
"The great saxophone god has spoken," another saxophone player.
"Hey Frenchies!" yelled Jon, "be sure you play the right notes today."
"Shut up," snapped Amanda.
"We're playing the right notes you just can't hear us above yourselves," Jessica added.
"That's it! What was I thinking when I decided to be a band director? I'm going home so I the voices in my head can calm me down!" said Mr. Reiderer.
He ran outta the band room. Two more bassoon players, Kaitlyn and Nicole walked in and bumped into him.
"What's going on in there?" Nicole asked.
"The band's gone crazy!" Mr. Reiderer yelled and continued sprinting down the hall.
Kaitlyn and Nicole shrugged and walked into the band room only to have a saxophone mouthpiece chucked at their heads.
"What was that for?" Kaitlyn yelled.
"Sorry you're bassoonists," said a saxophone player, "and we're at war with you."
Andy stood up.
"Since no one's here right now, let's get this battle started!" he yelled.
He grabbed his tuba and attempted to whack one of the trombone players with it. The trombone player pulled out his slide thing and blocked it. At the same time all the trumpets charged at the clarinet and flute players and the French horns snuck behind the trumpets. Kaitlyn and Nicole put their bassoons together and joined Meghan and the bass clarinetists in the fight. Mike and the percussion section started laughing at everyone. The fighting went on and on and on. This was very bad for the instruments.
"My reed broke!" yelled Schellen.
"My flute's bent!" yelled Karyn.
"Oops a valve fell out," said Jon.
"There's someone stuck in my tuba bell!" yelled Andy. "Cool!"
"Get me outta here!" yelled the poor person that was stuck inside.
"Sorry, you're a trombone player and you deserve it," said Andy.
"You know I could stop this whole war thing if I wanted," said Mike walking over to the percussionists, "but it's too funny to watch."
"Yeah and besides we'd stop it not you," one of them said.
"No I would," said Mike.
"No we would," they said.
"No me!" Mike yelled.
"No us!" they yelled.
"Fine. I declare war on you and I'll win!" he yelled.
He grabbed his bassoon and his saxophone and the percussionists grabbed their drumsticks. They started fighting each other. Meanwhile, Andy opened his spit valve and a huge wave of spit came pouring out. In other words the band room was about a foot deep in spit. Unfortunately the principal, Mr. Bauman walked into the band room at the same time Andy opened his spit valve.
"What is going on here?" he yelled.
The fighting stopped instantly.
"You, the tuba player get that person out of your bell," he barked.
Andy and his friend pulled the person out.
"All right who started this?" Mr. Bauman demanded.
"I don't mean to point any fingers but it was all their fault," said Andy pointing to the trombones and baritones.
"Us? You were the one who declared war on us in the first place," one of the trombone players said.
"Well the trumpets were annoying me," said Andy.
"Who us? No no. You got the wrong section," one of the trumpet players said. "It was the clarinets and flutes."
"No it wasn't," they protested.
"I don't care who it was! You guys are all getting phone calls home and detention for eternity and you'll be my slaves for the rest of your lives and you'll have to pay for all the damage you do to the instruments," yelled Mr. Bauman.
He stormed out.
"No no! Don't open the--" Meghan began.
He opened the door and all the spit flooded out into the halls.
"Door," said Meghan.
"No problem," said Andy, "we'll just have to have all our wars outside."
"Oh that's even better," Schellen said sarcastically. "Then everyone will see us!"
"So what? I only care about getting my revenge on the trombones and baritones!" said Andy.
"I'm with you all the way bro!" said Andy's friend, whacking him on the back. ( he'sanother tuba player by the way)
"You'll never get revenge on us! We'll get revenge on you," said a baritone player. "And we'll look good getting it."
"Oh so you're in this war for glory and not revenge?" snapped one of the trumpet players.
"No one asked you," Andy snapped back.
Everyone started arguing. Then the bell rang. Everyone was so mad that they grabbed their instruments and ran outta the band room to do who knows what (except Mike and the percussionists cuz they know when things have gone too far).
The next day, everyone was in a bad mood. It was likely that people would start beating the crap outta each other with their instruments but Mr. Reiderer came in before that could happen.
"Ok take out Into the Raging River," he said.
"I'd like to throw Andy into a Raging River," said one of the trombone players.
"Well I'd like you to burry yourself," said Andy. "That way you wouldn't keep screwing me up."
"Ok what is going on here?" asked Mike another bassoon player.
"Basically Andy got everyone mad and different sections declared war on each other," said Meghan. "The saxophones declared war on us and the bass clarinets."
Mike tried not to laugh.
"Dude I'm serious!" said Meghan.
"We wouldn't lay a finger on the Great Mike though," said a saxophone player.
"And why not?" Meghan asked him.
"Duh you're such an idiot. Of course you wouldn't know the great almighty Mike plays more than one instrument," said another saxophone player. "Mike is a saxophone god. We try to match our lowly playing to that of his phenomenal playing on a daily basis."
"Yeah and you're getting closer and closer every day," Meghan said sarcastically.
"Ok guys break it up," said Mike. "And only wind ensemble members are allowed to say phenomenal."
"The great saxophone god has spoken," another saxophone player.
"Hey Frenchies!" yelled Jon, "be sure you play the right notes today."
"Shut up," snapped Amanda.
"We're playing the right notes you just can't hear us above yourselves," Jessica added.
"That's it! What was I thinking when I decided to be a band director? I'm going home so I the voices in my head can calm me down!" said Mr. Reiderer.
He ran outta the band room. Two more bassoon players, Kaitlyn and Nicole walked in and bumped into him.
"What's going on in there?" Nicole asked.
"The band's gone crazy!" Mr. Reiderer yelled and continued sprinting down the hall.
Kaitlyn and Nicole shrugged and walked into the band room only to have a saxophone mouthpiece chucked at their heads.
"What was that for?" Kaitlyn yelled.
"Sorry you're bassoonists," said a saxophone player, "and we're at war with you."
Andy stood up.
"Since no one's here right now, let's get this battle started!" he yelled.
He grabbed his tuba and attempted to whack one of the trombone players with it. The trombone player pulled out his slide thing and blocked it. At the same time all the trumpets charged at the clarinet and flute players and the French horns snuck behind the trumpets. Kaitlyn and Nicole put their bassoons together and joined Meghan and the bass clarinetists in the fight. Mike and the percussion section started laughing at everyone. The fighting went on and on and on. This was very bad for the instruments.
"My reed broke!" yelled Schellen.
"My flute's bent!" yelled Karyn.
"Oops a valve fell out," said Jon.
"There's someone stuck in my tuba bell!" yelled Andy. "Cool!"
"Get me outta here!" yelled the poor person that was stuck inside.
"Sorry, you're a trombone player and you deserve it," said Andy.
"You know I could stop this whole war thing if I wanted," said Mike walking over to the percussionists, "but it's too funny to watch."
"Yeah and besides we'd stop it not you," one of them said.
"No I would," said Mike.
"No we would," they said.
"No me!" Mike yelled.
"No us!" they yelled.
"Fine. I declare war on you and I'll win!" he yelled.
He grabbed his bassoon and his saxophone and the percussionists grabbed their drumsticks. They started fighting each other. Meanwhile, Andy opened his spit valve and a huge wave of spit came pouring out. In other words the band room was about a foot deep in spit. Unfortunately the principal, Mr. Bauman walked into the band room at the same time Andy opened his spit valve.
"What is going on here?" he yelled.
The fighting stopped instantly.
"You, the tuba player get that person out of your bell," he barked.
Andy and his friend pulled the person out.
"All right who started this?" Mr. Bauman demanded.
"I don't mean to point any fingers but it was all their fault," said Andy pointing to the trombones and baritones.
"Us? You were the one who declared war on us in the first place," one of the trombone players said.
"Well the trumpets were annoying me," said Andy.
"Who us? No no. You got the wrong section," one of the trumpet players said. "It was the clarinets and flutes."
"No it wasn't," they protested.
"I don't care who it was! You guys are all getting phone calls home and detention for eternity and you'll be my slaves for the rest of your lives and you'll have to pay for all the damage you do to the instruments," yelled Mr. Bauman.
He stormed out.
"No no! Don't open the--" Meghan began.
He opened the door and all the spit flooded out into the halls.
"Door," said Meghan.
"No problem," said Andy, "we'll just have to have all our wars outside."
"Oh that's even better," Schellen said sarcastically. "Then everyone will see us!"
"So what? I only care about getting my revenge on the trombones and baritones!" said Andy.
"I'm with you all the way bro!" said Andy's friend, whacking him on the back. ( he'sanother tuba player by the way)
"You'll never get revenge on us! We'll get revenge on you," said a baritone player. "And we'll look good getting it."
"Oh so you're in this war for glory and not revenge?" snapped one of the trumpet players.
"No one asked you," Andy snapped back.
Everyone started arguing. Then the bell rang. Everyone was so mad that they grabbed their instruments and ran outta the band room to do who knows what (except Mike and the percussionists cuz they know when things have gone too far).