Chapter 40

Elizabeth stepped out of the witness box and walked out the room without a backward glance. She didn't want the jury to see just how much the DA had gotten to her, and she was afraid to look at Jason. She didn't want to look into his eyes and see the disappointment she knew would be there. She was supposed help Jason, convince the jury that Jason did not kill Lucky. Instead she showed them that she was a liar. What jury was going to believe anything she said? Alexis had been counting on her instead she had let both Alexis and Jason down.

Elizabeth found the nearest empty bench and buried her head in her hands. This couldn't be happening, she thought. Any minute now she would wake up and this nightmare would be over. It had too, didn't it? Jason really couldn't be convicted for killing Lucky. Where was the justice? A small giggle rose from her stomach that she couldn't suppress. A hit man was going to be convicted for a crime he didn't commit. Maybe this was what they meant by a blind justice. Jason had killed many people - she didn't even know how many - but the one murder the DA was going to win was one he didn't do. And she was the reason it was going to happen.

The small giggle soon became a quiet laugh. She thought back to Jason's worry about her being hurt because of him, how his enemies would use her to get to him. He'd been right. They did use her. They didn't bomb her studio or kidnap her and use her for leverage. They just left her alone and let her bring Jason down all on her own. Maybe she should write a book - 'How to Rid Yourself of an Enemy Without Lifting a Finger' - a must have Christmas present for every powerful mob Don and two-bit wannabe. You don't need explosives or guns or drugs; you just need a stupid little girl who doesn't know what she wants.

Elizabeth was laughing hysterically now. People walking past her were openly staring but she didn't care. She couldn't control herself. It was either laugh or cry, and crying wasn't an option right now. She could cry later, when she was alone, where no one could see her. She couldn't break down right now. Not in the middle of the courthouse, where reporters were around every corner. Yes, laughter was better than crying. It was the best medicine, right? Then, why wasn't it working?

Carly couldn't believe what she was seeing. When she'd decided to check on Elizabeth, this wasn't what she'd expected. Depressed Elizabeth, teary eyed Elizabeth, even denial Elizabeth, but hysterical bordering on crazy Elizabeth was something else entirely. She approached the other woman with care not wanting to scare her. Elizabeth didn't seem to notice that she was standing in front of her. After calling her name didn't get her attention, Carly grabbed Elizabeth's shoulders and gave them a little shake. Still, the younger woman wouldn't stop. Carly tightened her grip and shook her harder.

"Elizabeth," she yelled, "stop laughing."

Elizabeth stopped instantly and looked at the older woman seeing her for the first time. "You were right, Carly. I'm poison for Jason," she said quietly as tears began to run down her face.

Without thinking Carly wrapped her arms around Elizabeth and let her cry on her shoulder. It was a surreal moment. Carly was comforting a woman she normally would be tormenting. Maybe it was the pregnancy. Her body was betraying her. Yes, she'd decided to be nicer to the little twit for Jason's sake, but she didn't think it would mean consoling her. God, the things she did for her friends. Jason better appreciate it.

Elizabeth pulled away wiping the tears from her eyes shock covering her face. What was she doing? She was crying on Carly's shoulder, and Carly was letting her. The world must have turned upside down when she wasn't looking. Maybe she'd entered an alternative reality without noticing.

"What are you doing here, Carly?"

Carly could see the other woman's back straightening preparing for an attack. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Yeah right," Elizabeth scoffed. "You hate me. You wouldn't even spit on me if I were on fire. Why should I believe you care if I'm okay?"

Carly sighed seeing the younger woman wasn't going to make this easy. "Look, I was in the court room. I saw that bitch of a DA make mince meat of you." She shrugged, "I was worried about you."

Elizabeth was starting to get angry. "I'm not in the mood right now for your stupid games. Just throw your insults at me and leave me alone."

Carly frowned. "Elizabeth, I'm not here to insult you."

Elizabeth stood needing distance between her and Jason's best friend. "Why not? Today proved that everything you've ever said about me was true. I am bad for Jason. I would think you would be on cloud nine, jumping for joy."

"No," the blond said shaking her head, "I was wrong. You're not bad for Jason. You make Jason happy." Carly could see the shock she felt reflecting in the other woman's eyes. Damn this pregnancy. What else is it going to make her do?

"God, you really do hate me," Elizabeth whispered the tears she'd just got under control threatened to fall again. "I know I made a lot of mistakes when it came to Lucky and Jason, and I will always feel guilty over Lucky's death, but I don't deserve this. You have no right. I've never done anything to you. You and Jason were already broken up when we became friends. I didn't come between you. I mean, you love Sonny now anyway. Why are you being so mean to me?"

Carly felt a gnawing in her stomach. She'd felt it during Elizabeth's testimony as well, but she wasn't sure what was causing it. It wasn't a pregnancy thing, she was sure, so what was it? She looked at the teary-eyed woman and the feeling intensified. It couldn't be guilt, could it? God, look what she had become. A person with a conscience. Maybe hell was freezing over. She would have laughed but she didn't want to upset the other woman more than she already was.

"Elizabeth," she said not sure where to begin. It wasn't every day she apologized to someone. Hopefully, it wasn't the beginning of a trend. "I know I haven't been the nicest person to you in the past and for that I apologize." Carly could see Elizabeth didn't believe her. "Really, I'm sorry for everything I've done to you - the insults, the photo shoot, everything.

"You're right. You didn't come between me and Jason. I ruined that relationship all on my own. I didn't need any help. I blamed you because I couldn't blame myself. I didn't want to admit how stupid I was. All I could see was that Jason was moving on with his life and I wasn't a part of it, not the way I had always dreamed about." She smiled at the old memory. "We were supposed to be the happy family - me, Jason and Michael. I couldn't get that dream out of my head. Even though I knew deep down it was never going to happen, I kept fighting for it. You were the person getting in the way of that dream.

"After I married Sonny, I finally let the dream go, because I had found what I was really looking for with him. But I guess, I didn't let go of my hate for you. And it got worse when all I could see was Jason hurting because you. Jason deserves to be happy and you weren't giving him that. I wouldn't let myself see that you were hurting too. I didn't know what was going on with Lucky. If I had known ... No," she said shaking her head, "that's not true. I still would have been cruel to you, probably even more so. That's who I am. I fight dirty for my friends. Jason was hurting so I wanted you to hurt. I can't change what I've done. All I can say is I'm sorry."

Elizabeth was speechless. She didn't know if she could forgive this person for all the hurt she had put her through. Was she a strong enough person to do that? She wasn't sure, but if Carly had the strength to apologize, maybe she had the strength to accept it. "Thank you, Carly. I know it must have taken a lot for you to say all that. I can't really tell you that I'm okay with the photo shoot - next to the actual rape it was the worst experience of my life - but I think I can let it go. For Jason. I know how much you mean to him, and I know it would hurt him if we continued to hate each other. Jason's been hurt enough because of us, don't you think?"

Carly nodded in agreement. She couldn't believe Elizabeth was going to put everything she had done to her aside. If the situation was turned around, Carly knew she wouldn't have been able to do that. "You're something else, you know that. And I don't mean that in a negative way. I guess I just refused to see it before, but you really are the right woman for Jason."

Elizabeth laughed. "Yeah, I'm sure. Did you see me in that courtroom just now?"

"Jason's not going to hold what the DA did against you and you shouldn't either," Carly told her. "You did your best. Don't let this discourage you and make you change your mind about being with him. He deserves the best and since I'm not available, you're it." She laughed, "Seriously, you fight for Jason and that's all I ever really wanted. Someone who will put Jason first. As long as you make Jason happy, you won't get anymore trouble from me."

"Thank you," Elizabeth said, "I can't believe we're having this conversation. It doesn't seem real."

"Yeah well, don't get used to it. We're not going to become friends. There's only so much I'm willing to do for Jason and that isn't one of them," Carly told the younger woman.

Elizabeth nodded. "We don't have to be friends, Carly. We just don't need to be enemies, especially since we're on the same side. We both just want Jason to be happy."

"Good, then we agree," Carly said putting out her hand. "A truce."

Elizabeth took Carly's hand. "A truce," she said as they shook hands.

An awkward silence followed the exchange. Neither woman knew what to say to the other. After several excruciating moments, Elizabeth put them out of their misery by excusing herself under the guise of searching for her grandmother leaving Carly alone in the hall way. The gnawing feeling had disappeared. She smiled and rubbed her stomach.

"There you are," Sonny said coming up behind his wife. "I've been looking every where for you." He wrapped his arms around her from behind and gave her a quick kiss on her neck. "Court's in recess until tomorrow."

Carly turned and placed her hands on his shoulders. "I was talking to Elizabeth."

Sonny moved to look around the area. "There's no blood, so it didn't come to blows," he said jokingly.

Carly smacked him in the stomach. "You'd be proud of me. I apologized for the way I treated her."

Sonny was dumbstruck, "You did?"

"Yes, and for Jason, she let everything go," she admitted. "We've agreed to a truce. I don't think we'll ever be friends but we won't be fighting anymore."

Sonny smiled at his beautiful wife. "I love you, you know that."

Carly smiled in return. "I love you, too."

"Let's go home," he said taking her hand.

Carly nodded and started following her husband down the hall. "When we get there, I have something wonderful to tell you and Michael."