Insanity of a Haunted Man
Disclaimer - Harry Potter, sadly, does not belong to me. Though if it did, I'd probably mess it up :P I don't own the Linkin Park song In The End either. Just had to put it in, lol.
A/N - Being insane is fun, and it's great to write too. What am I saying? Bad fingers, bad!
Ok, just another ramble I made. Hope you like. I did borrow Carosel from someone, but at the moment I can't remember who. If I find out I'll give them proper credit; I think I have the story lying around somewhere upstairs. I have twisted it though, so don't think theirs was like mine.
Harry Potter was sent to Azkaban for crimes he can't remember. The voices keep him sane though, they don't let him fall into the insanity he hears through his cell door each night...
"No, not Harry, please, not Harry!"
"Stand aside, you silly girl."
"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead! Not Harry! Please… have mercy… have mercy…"
"Avada…"Something changed.
Falling backwards, through the misty Veil, his face looking shocked and stunned as he watched his cousin gloating…
He could feel the dark receding, changing, dissipating.
In his head, pain, terrible pain… Voldemort.
Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort Voldemort
The door opening. Someone entering, a hand on his face, ignoring it, not realising it, not caring anymore.
"Harry?"
"Not Harry, please, not Harry!"
"Harry?" soft, hurt, distressed.
"Harry Potter…" slit nose, red eyes, thin mouth…
He felt himself rising off the floor where he had lain for… how long? How long?
"Long long, how long long," he sang suddenly, startling the man holding him up so that he fell to the floor, not bothering to brace his fall, not bothering to save his face from contacting with the stones, not feeling it.
"Oh Harry!" the man cried, kneeling down beside him and lifting his face on his limp neck so as to check him for injuries.
'Woof woof. Moon, moon, moon,' he thought, looking into the grey eyes framed by grey hair.
"There's nothing you can do, Harry… nothing…he's gone."
Harry looked blankly up at the man, not recognising him other than from his nightmares. So many nightmares, who was to say they weren't the reality.
"Help me with him Arthur, just… that's it, now lets… now left a bit, left… left… ok, now, I think you can let him go."
He felt himself lain on something softer than stone, perhaps cloth? To be honest he didn't care. A shock of red hair came into view, followed by a face. He vaguely recognised it, but like the other it only featured in nightmares now.
"Good god Remus!" Arthur said, looking at Harry in shock. Covered in blood from head to foot, his clothes non-existent. He had teeth missing; he was virtually bald and he was covered in scars. They could count his ribs, and knew from their angles that he had broken many of them repeatedly and not had them set, giving his chest a caved in look.
"Give him the water," Remus urged, starting to pull the hand cart behind him, on which the silent and un-responding form of Harry was lying.
Something made contact with his lips and something wet spilled into his mouth. He lay for a moment with the liquid in his mouth then took a breath. He began to choke, weakly, not caring of the pain but having the automatic reaction to the liquid flooding his lungs. Something touched his chest and coolness spread to his lungs, the choking fading as he lay limp on the cart. He looked to his left and saw…
Sirius. He remembered that name. He was the man who fell through the Veil. He was looking around him in fear.
He was here once… Harry laughed. He could see around him for the first time since arriving. The stone walls stopped moving and he looked around to see Remus looking down at him in hope and fear. He laughed again.
"Moony! Moony!" he said, grinning up at him with his broken teeth. A nicer memory was slipping through, of shining horses and little people riding them, floating around in mid air before him as he tried to catch them, three faces on the other side of them… Moony, Sirius and his dad. "Carousel!"
Mooney looked suddenly upset and Harry laughed as the horses appeared before his eyes. He put a hand out to pick them out of the air, flicking the little figures off with grim interest as they screamed on their way down into the darkness under the floating horses. Remus leant in to see who was on the horses and drew back as one of the faces turned towards him, the glasses shining and the brown eyes behind them pleading to be saved.
I killed them all. Everyone died. It's only me alive. Me and Him. I've seen them die. I saw it al. This is just another nightmare. What are you doing to yourself, Harry? Just get out of there and kill him. I don't know where he is. Then we will find him. But what if we can't? Then we shall search. What if they stop us? They won't be able to. But they will try. We shall have to stop them. It won't be easy. When has anything been easy in your life? Never. When we were young it was easy. They already knew what we were going to do. They never told us. We will kill him. They want us to. We shall do what they want. We know what he wants. We know where he is. We know how to kill him. We may die as well. Does it matter? Not anymore. Where are they taking us? Who are they if they aren't themselves. We saw them die. What if that was another lie. Does it matter. Grimmauld Place. Not anymore. I don't want to go there. They want us to kill him. Do they care? Does it matter? Never. No. not anymore. Has it ever. Ever what? I don't remember much. We remember all. How many of us are there? Many, many, many. I don't know. Are we there yet? Remember when you saw Ron for the first time. How long did you think it would take to get that essay done? Have we finished it yet? I remember Ron. He has red hair too. Like him. Who? Him. Where? Behind us. Behind us? Where are we?
Light! Look, its light! I remember light. I don't. Look then, it looks beautiful. I remember the sun. There is no sun here. It is fire. Candles. The sun is fire. Big fire, high up, far away. Never go to the sun. Too far. Very far. Yes. Will we ever see the sun again, do you think? No. I wish…
I wish…
I wish…
What do you wish Harry?
I wish I had died with Voldemort when I was a baby. It would all be over. He would be dead. I would be dead. None of this pain. None of this hurt. None of this death. Mum, dad, Cedric, Sirius, all the others who are dead… they might be alive. Do you believe that might have happened? No, it wouldn't have ever happened because Dumbledore wouldn't have let it! Dumbledore, Dumbledore Dumbledore Dumbledore Dumbledore! It's all his fault we came here. It's all his fault. He thought it was for the best… yeah right! He just wanted us to be somewhere he knew he could get to us. How long were we there? Has Voldemort already been killed? No. We would know. I don't know how long… it was all nightmares…
A tug in his navel and then a stumbling and crash.
I know this place. I don't want to be here. Then leave. I don't know how. Shall I teach you? Can you teach me? You don't need to be taught. Who are you? We are you. You are us. I don't remember anything. I do. I do. Where are we? Grimmauld Place. I don't like this place. Tell them. They won't listen. I know. They will tell you nice things are going to happen and leave you to die. We don't want to die. No, I don't want to die either. They won't do that to us. Would they? No. Yes. I don't remember. Is it dark? It is quiet. I remember the dark. We hate the dark. I remember.
"Harry?" Another red head, this time female. She looked no different from the last time he had seen her, except this time Molly Weasley had a body connected to her head. He looked at her blankly. "Oh, Harry, what have we done to you?"
We don't remember anything before the dark. I remember here. Sirius lived here. He hated the place. Destroy it. No. I can't. I don't want to hurt anyone. Except Voldemort. Except Voldemort. Except Voldemort.
He opened his mouth. Those around him leaned in to hear what he was going to say.
"Except Voldemort. He is here. I can feel him. He will die. I will kill him. I swear. You can't do that. I can. Why. Because I have to. Why. Because there are too many. It will die. We don't care. It will hurt. Can anything hurt worse than this? No. No. No. We know it will hurt. I don't mind. We have to kill him. I know. Can we. Yes. Will we. Yes. When?"
Harry blinked slowly, rolling off the bed he had been lain on. He saw the hem of a blue robe next to him. He ignored it, knowing who the man was as he took a step back.
"When? I don't know. We think soon? Yes, soon. When?" he began to giggle, resting his head on the bed. Tears began to roll down his face as he cracked up into hysterics. He eventually managed to look up at the old man and those around him, and he laughed again.
"Ain't no stopping us now!" he sang through his laughter. Frowns appeared on the faces around him, looks of fear, shock and disgust. "When?"
"Now." Harry stopped laughing and lay gasping. In a longing voice he whispered, "Now?"
"End it now. No more death? No more nightmares? No more life? Yes, to all the above. Show me." A wind began to tug at Harry and he laughed for a moment before disappearing from Grimmauld Place.
He appeared in the middle of a Death Eater meeting. For a few seconds there was shocked silence, then Voldemort rose from his seat.
"Mr Potter. I understand you left Azkaban recently?"
"Azkaban?" Harry said mildly, looking around him and holding his hand in the air next to him. When it came away there seemed to be a window left behind. He looking into it and laughed. "Look Tom! It's Dumbledore!" Dumbledore drew his head back sharply. Harry frowned.
"Why are we here? I forget. I remember. You do it then. Are you sure? We want to play! Just get it over with. Very well.
"Tom Marvolo Riddle. We, the joint entities of Harry James Potter…Is that us? Yes! Oh wow! Shh, I want to listen! Sorry! …find you guilty of mass crimes against the human race, both Muggle and magical. We therefore cast you out. You have a choice. Does he? Yes! Oooh, bugger. SHUT UP! You may choose imprisonment. You shall be kept by our entity in a prison of our choice. You shall remain there until the end of your life. Or…There's an or? Obviously. Is it a good or? I think you'll like it, now shh. …you shall be killed at our hand. I like that or. Shhh! Your followers shall follow you into your fate. Choose, Tom Riddle, heir apparent of Slytherin."
Voldemort threw back his head and laughed. Around him his followers laughed along with him. Then his hand flew forward, gripping Harry around his thin neck. Harry was lifted off the floor.
"What makes you think I believe you, Potter?" he hissed. Harry made no move, but Voldemort suddenly screamed and flew backwards, hitting his throne with a sickening crack.
"Ooh! Can we play! Please say we can play with him! Umm… Very well." Harry shrieked with joy and Voldemort began to scream and writhe. "Oh yay! Oh joy! Oh hey! Oh hoy!" Suddenly Harry looked at the window, a slight frown on his face.
I put my trust, in you,
Pushed as far as I can go,
For all this,
There's only one thing
You should know,
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lift it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
There was a snap. Voldemort's body collapsed into its chair. Around Harry the Death Eaters fell too. Within seconds he was the only one alive in the hall.
Walk away, heard you say,
Poisoned hearts will never change
Walk away again
Turned away, in this place,
Felt the chill upon my face,
Walk away again.
With one last smile Harry collapsed onto the ground. Dead before his heart stopped beating.
A/N2 The brown eyed man falling off the horse was James. Just thought I'd clear that up before people asked me in a review lol