When there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
One more son
If you can hold on
If you can hold on, hold on
I wanna stand up, I wanna let go
You know, you know - no you don't, you don't
I wanna shine on in the hearts of men
I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand
Who ever said that loneliness was cruel was the berry's. Brilliant; just plain brilliant. I sit here all alone, just dreaming of the day I can ravish him. But for now, I can do nothing. He hates me. He utterly hates me. I know I said that I hated him, and to his face no less, but Potter. Harry Potter is everything I want. He is everything I have ever desired. But Harry is someone else's. Wood. That ruddy boy. Oliver Wood is the abject of my hate. Wood is dating Harry. The Harry I've loved for so long. Damn it. Every time I look at the fool, and every time I see the way Harry looks at him, I want to rip him apart. I want to rip myself apart.
I never exactly thought he would date me. But I had certainly hoped he would. Until I found out about this long running 'thing' with him and Wood. Now any chance seemed impossible. How did he keep his boyfriend a secret since second year? I was the one who liked him since I spoke to him while being fitted for robes. I was the one who loved him since I saw him chasing that damned Remembrall through the air. But I was the one who poked fun at him. The one who insulted him. The one who he hated for being such a jerk. I'm the reason he isn't with me.
Another head aches, another heart breaks
I am so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection, no no no no
Help me out
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out
Finally… the trip to bloody Hogsmead. I can finally get the happy couple out of my mind. Maybe see someone interesting. I walked in front. If I was further back, I would've seen him. Him and the boy he calls his 'boyfriend'. Once we made it Snape barked out the time we had to be ready to leave. We had three hours. I ran to the Three Broomsticks. As I walked in, I noticed that filthy girl Granger looking a bit glum. This is the exact second I devised my plan. "Hello, Hermione. Lovely day today, is it not."
"Get away from me Malfoy. I am not in the mood for your insults." She replied, like she was on the verge of tears.
"Insults? Do you really think so little of me?" I said while snaking my arm around her petite waist. "Why would I ever insult you?"
She looked at me, horrified as I was. How could I be say these words so smoothly to her? "Why? You always have. Calling me a 'filthy little mudblood'. Face it Malfoy. You are a jerk to me."
"I'm hurt 'Mione. Really. It was all a rouse." Now she was even more shocked. A rouse? How was this possible?
"A rouse? You calling me a filthy little mudblood a rouse? You deserve to be killed." She spat. The venom was dripping on her every word.
"Goodbye Granger." I said, not wanting to deal with an angry woman. As I walked out, I saw exactly what I didn't want to. My Harry with that boabie's arm around his waist. Oliver Wood. Once again I felt the need to tear him to pieces. And then tear myself apart. It hit me early on. If I killed Wood, then I would never have Harry, because he would hate me for killing his boyfriend. It was a win-lose situation. Not the best kind.
And when there's nowhere else to run
Is there room for one more son
These changes ain't changing me
The cold-hearted boy I used to be
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out
You're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down
I walked through the couple, grunting as an apology. I had no reason to apologize. Why apologize to a boabie and his boyfriend. Especially when his boyfriend was the guy I fell in love with so many years ago. I hate him. I loathe the boy named Oliver Wood. Harry is a man. A man of a million charms. A man who could –if he wanted to- be the only one who could know me. Who could save me.
I walked to the edge of Hogsmead, seeing Granger and Weasley. They deserved each other. Really, but once again, that brought me back to how Wood didn't deserve Harry. I walked away. I walked to the meeting point and just decided to leave. No one was going to miss me. Not Blaise. Not Pansy. And who name their child after a bloody flower. A flower that is frequently used in insults. The same kind of insults I shoot at Harry every day. And once again, I am depressed. Depressed more at the fact that I created my own enemy and that I could've prevented it all.
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
I got soul, but I'm not a soldier
Yeah, you know you got to help me out
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
You know you got to help me out
You're gonna bring yourself down
You're gonna bring yourself down
Yeah, oh don't you put me on the back burner
Yeah, you're gonna bring yourself down
I reached the castle. Everything was pretty quite. There were girls giggling here and there. But not so many that you couldn't just ignore it. The thing I couldn't ignore was the pointing. They were all pointing and laughing. Had I sat in something? Girls were weird. No wonder I prefer boys. Well. No wonder I prefer Harry. Boys in general didn't do anything for me. They were just there. Harry on the other hand. Harry was like a shock to the system. A lot of people feared me. When they were extremely obvious about it is when I got angry. But Harry. Harry didn't show fear. I'm not even sure he was afraid of me. But He kind of scared me. When he was angry, he was scarier than the Dark Lord. But a true Malfoy never admits that he is scared.
I sat down in the common room. The fire was warm against my pale skin and cold demeanor. Sometimes the fire seemed to make Harry obtainable. The fire was comforting, like he was wrapping his arms around me on a cold day, where no one wants to do anything but curl up into a ball and pretend it its all ok. Especially when it isn't. Especially right now.
Over and in, last call for sin
While everyone's lost, the battle is won
With all these things that I've done
All these things that I've done
If you can hold on
If you can hold on
i hope you liked it. It is my first Harry Potter fanfic. I love Oliver and all but... Draco rocks. This has nothing to do with anything. I just... wanted to write it. The lyrics are "Allthese Thing That I've Done" by the Killers. 'cause, they rock... I hope this was ok. waves byebye R&R