I LOVE YOU! EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU! I was going to give up on this fic truthfully and honestly, I hated it, I couldn't believe that anyone would want to read it. I mean I honestly could only look as it as the pathetic work of a sugar high. But all my friends and all my reviews kept begging and begging me to write more, and finally about a month before this was updated I stopped hating it, thanks to a discussion I had with Mariks-Gurl21, she told me that if I stop writing I have to tell her what happens and that she still rereads the last chapter if she just needs a good laugh even though she knew hat happened. So this chapter is dedicated to her, thank you so much Jessie! And everyone I want you to know that I'm so completely sorry for being such a looser, I can't believe I left you all hanging, thank you guys so much for sticking with me, I almost have 150 reviews! I LOVE YOU PEOPLE! (yet again) Here's your chapter, nice and long as another apology.
:Last chapter review:--- "Bakura doesn't act like that," Yugi murmured in agreement.
"Well it's a bloody good thing he's not Bakura then isn't it? Honestly Bakura I can deal with, but god is his clone annoying!" Malik moved his hands around to emphasize his point, and accidentally dropped his rod up side down, and Yugi's bird friend started to sing the can can once more.
"Oh shut up! I'm getting the stupid rod!" Malik said grabbing the rod and holding it right side up and the singing immediately stopped. "Baka bird."
"God, how could this mess come from driving your boyfriend's friend's home?' Seto muttered, "I guess this is why I've avoided the whole social thing so long."
"Aw don't worry Kaiba-kun, I'll always love you," Malik comforted him, though it really didn't make him feel anymore assured.
"Get away from me you pervert!" He said jumping of the couch.
And thus, Hell broke loose.---
Frozen Fire Makes No Water
Satan Couldn't Have Made Better Hell
Anzu snickered as she watched Seto scamper across the room a disturbed look on his face. "This is funny and all," She paused as Kaiba glared holes into her, "But, I really think that all of us deserve some sort of explanation."
Malik's cream-violet eyes watched her for a moment before his gaze fell to the floor, "Yes, I guess so, but it really isn't a tale I want to share." He smirked, as the entire room glared at him, "It honestly is much more fun watching you trying to do the physically impossible act of killing me with your glares."
Yami growled slightly in annoyance, "You efitoblikably materialize in the middle of the room, you also happen to show up with the tomb-robber, who you claim is actually a clone, not to mention leaving us with one of your minions for efitoblikable Hell!" The last comment was quite clearly directed at the can-can bird.
" 'Minion from Hell' Honestly, you were pharaoh, Horus on earth? Horus being the falcon god, falcons being birds," Malik sighed overdramatically, then decided it might be best to start answering Pharaoh boy's questions, lest the elder Kaiba kill him. "Okay, fine, here goes: First of all, I don't have a clue why I'm here, second, that dolt is most certainly NOT Bakura, and is in fact his clone, and thirdly I want the bird to leave just as much as you do, actually probably more, you've only had to deal with it for a few hours!"
"You do realize starting at the beginning could've been a good plan, right?" Mokuba said, having wandered into the room only moments before.
The teen that strongly resembled Bakura turned to the boy, and eyed him strangely for a few moments before finally stating, "Your hair is pretty, can I put it in braids?"
"…"
The rest of the room's responses weren't much better then the blank stare the little Kaiba was giving the stranger, when he finally spoke it was in a strange voice and quite obviously begging for his brother to help him, "Big brother? That's the evil psycho maniac who tried to kill us a few times right? What does he want with my hair; it never did anything to him."
"Look whoever you are, leave my brother alone, go braid someone else's hair. I'm sure Malik here wouldn't mind, after all it is his fault you're here," Seto said slowly glaring at both the blond and the white haired teen.
Said teen was looking rater crestfallen, his eyes lowered to the floor and his head tilted slightly, "I already tried, but he said... he said…" the boy trailed off, looking as though he was on the verge of tears, "He said I was a useless poof, who had no better purpose in life then to turn masculine males into sick girly gay creatures like me."
Malik sighed in exasperation rubbing his hands over his eyes, "Will you please shut up, and you are a poof but that's beside the point. I need to get some explaining done, and this really isn't helping me expl---" he would've continued but was cut off by yelling out in the hallway.
"SHIT! Ms. Brawlway is going to KILL me! I'm supposed to be serving detention! Shit, shit, shit, shit!" said a voice that sounded female, distressed, and oddly familiar. The members of the living room regarded each other for a moment, counting to see who was missing, but everyone was still there. After a shared glance they all sprinted out of the room in search of whoever just appeared out of thin air.
"Where am I? Ah what did I do to deserve this I'm too young to die from an enraged math teacher!" And with these words the seven teenagers and one preteen, found a very random girl with long black hair and bright green eyes. There was a stunned silence for a moment before Anzu finally broke the ice.
"Uhm, hello, who are you?" She said then added, "I'm Anzu."
Random girl stared at the only other female in the room for a moment before stating quite politely, "Where the fuck am I?" Her bright green eyes were questioning and sincere. Anzu was taken aback by the question, especially since swearing and sincerity were rarely used in the same sentence.
Seto intervened, "You're in my mansion, and this is the worst day of my life, so do me a favor and fuck off." this comment was quickly fallowed by Yami's scolding, "Seto that was efitoblikably rude! Apologize now!"
Random girl's face lit up as she smiled and stated brightly, "Ooh! I know you two, you're those hot gay guys!" most people in said hallway were quite aware of the fact that Yami and the older Kaiba were indeed 'those hot gay guys', although Yugi was the sole member of the oblivious minority.
"Yami! You never told me you were gay!" Yugi said, violet eyes large with hurt.
Yami blushed rather violently, "I... I.. Well ya.. but.. I...efito.. sorry?"
Yugi looked at his dark for a few moments before finally sighing, "There's nothing to be sorry for! It's just I wish you told me, you know you can tell me anything right?" Yami gave a small guilty smile before stating that there was "an efitoblikbale other thing" that he needed to tell his Hikari about as well, but sadly was interrupted before he got to 'an'.
"Sorry to interrupt, but I don't have a clue what I'm doing here..." Random girl said looking around at the expensively decorated halls. "Nice mansion Kaiba."
Malik chose this time to step forward, "I, the incredibly sexy egyptian, am the reason you are here."
"Shuddup Malik!"
"Quiet Jou! As I was saying, I have a tendency to dabble in magic, its a bad habit and I really should quit, but you see I have a bit of a power obsession," Seto snorted at the use of 'a bit'. Malik played no heed and continued into a rather long dramatic monologue, but after several minutes was interrupted.
"What do you mean you tried to make your efitoblikable millennium rod see into the future!" Yami shouted blood red eyes ablaze.
"Well, is it my fault that my rod didn't have that power?" Malik said, rolling his eyes.
"DON'T EFITOBLIKABLY MESS WITH MAGIC!" Yami yelled. The rage present in his eyes, and the commanding tone of voice made it quite obvious that he was indeed a Pharaoh.
"Your scary," Malik stated hiding behind random girl. Yami looked about ready to hurt said tomb guarder, but was restrained by Seto's hand being placed firmly and reassuringly on his shoulder.
"Look, can you just tell us what happened?" Anzu said. Malik's head poked out from behind RG and said, "Fine, but only if he promises not to kill me."
"I efitoblikably promise I wont hurt you." Malik stepped out, "Unless you really piss me off." "eep!"
"Okay, fine, the telling of the story. Like I said, I tried to 'edit' my millennium item, it sort of backfired. So instead of seeing the future it simply messed with time, so the reason it is snowing, is because, well... Merry Christmas everyone!"
This comment was followed by a very thick silence, but after several long minutes said silence was broken.
"Cool I love Christmas!" Mokuba and Random Girl said in unison, then turned to each other and grinned.
"That doesn't explain why losers are appearing in my house," the eldest Kaiba said, his ice-blue eyes as sharp as glass.
"Uhm, I think that it may be the magic's idea of a 'Christmas Party', well that's my bet anyway," Malik said with a huge smile.
"Grrrrr.."
"What about your efitoblikable hell minion?" Yami said while restraining his lover. The blond egyptian merely started laughing.
"I have no clue about that thing, but you can keep him, I think he likes your Hikari," Malik smirked, "Oh ya, you can also keep Arukab, your hair might look nice in pigtails you never know."
" I would NOT put his hair in pigtails! It would look horrible that way! Your hair on the other hand..." The Bakura clone said eyeing the blond tresses with interest.
"Get away from me! Pick on someone else's head!"
"If it's Christmas I want egg nog!" Mokuba said brightly. "Please Seto-o-o!" The raven haired boy some how managed to make 'seto' stretch to a four syllable word.
"Mokuba, it is not Christmas," the brunet replied.
"But I want egg nog!"
"Why do you want egg nog? It's not Christmas, you're not American, and we have no power!" But just as the words escaped his lips, the lights buzzed and flashed on, blinding them all momentarily before turning off, leaving the dark seeming much more black. Buzz. Flash. The light was back on, but this time instead of the usual modern-styled ceiling lights, there were the steady glow of Christmas lights.
By the light of said decorations other such festivities were to be seen. Long streamers of holy, and thick green wreaths spotted with cherry-red berries, and to Seto's uttermost disgust mistletoe was also present.
"Aww Kaiba! I didn't know you were so good at decorating!" Malik cooed, earning himself a glare.
"You know, I've never had egg nog before," Random girl said thoughtfully, "Kid, wanna make some?"
"Yay!" Was Mokuba's response before grabbing her hand and dragging her towards the kitchen.
"Uhm, doesn't egg nog have alcohol in it?" Yugi asked.
"Duh," Seto said, rolling his eyes, then a slightly disturbed look crossed his features and he murmured, "God, I did not just say 'duh'"
"Cool I want booze!" Jou said, and soon rushed down the hallway after the two raven-haired teens.
"Come on Yugi, we really shouldn't leave Jono alone with alcoholic beverages," Anzu said dragging him with her, "Yami, you come too."
"There more the merrier!" Malik said going to join the others, but before he did so, he called over his shoulder, "Loosen up some, Kaiba, it's Christmas, live a little!"
"It is not Christmas!"
"You really shouldn't argue with him, he can be scary when he's pissed off," Arukab said.
"I can be much more frightening."
"Did he call you a poof too?" The white haired teen asked, looking sympathetically at the brunet.
Said brunet ignored that comment, asking instead, "Who are you anyway."
"I'm the clone of someone named Bakura, Malik doesn't think I act much like him though. I'm Arukab, Malik named me that because he said I was the opposite of Bakura, so my name is backwards too," Arukab replied, looking honestly sad that he couldn't live up to Malik's standards. He turned his large chocolate brown eyes up at Seto, "And who are you?"
"Seto Kaiba, multi-billionaire. Come on lets go before the freak show burns down my mansion." Arukab nodded in response and followed the taller teen down the long hallway.
Normal POV (In the movie theatre):
Ryou sat in the lobby, his smooth face very pale, he looked rather sick. His Yami walked over, over having convinced a couple of ten year olds that he was a vampire and would kill them all the second they turned their backs, "Hey hikari! This is so much fun! I just love the movies! What's wrong? I thought you liked the last movie," Bakura said, his grin fading when he noticed his light's obvious displeasure
"Bakura, the last movie was full of zombies ripping off people's heads, yanking the brains out through the neck, and consuming them as one might spaghetti," Ryou said scathingly.
"Yeah… Wasn't it awesome?" Bakura replied, a sort of dreamy look in his eyes as he mentally visualized the gore.
"No, it was not awesome! It was sick and disturbing and bad!" Ryou's face tinged slightly green.
Bakura went over to his light and wrapped his arms around the slightly smaller boy, "Shh, it wasn't that bad, besides, Pharaoh-boy told me that they don't actually kill people in these movies, and they don't summon real zombies either, which is efitoblikably awful! I mean all that blood, just food coloring, and all those nice squelchy brains just rubber, and the peeling flesh, the rotten zombie skin---" And Bakura kept going, whispering into his light's ear about cracking bones an eating brains and other such gore.
"OkaythanksBakurathatsenough!" Ryou said quite quickly before rushing off towards the bathroom.
"I'm bored, stupid pharaoh, I bet he made this snow storm just to bother me," Bakura grumbled to himself. The theatre so far had managed to avoid power outages, excluding an occasional flicker of the lighting. So the people trapped inside the building were mostly amusing themselves by watching movie after movie, Bakura had managed to drag Ryou into a total of 2 horror movies and three very violent action ones, including the one they originally came to watch.
Ryou came back out of the bathroom and walked back over to his rather psychotic dark. "Bakura, why do you never watch movies about cute fluffy bunnies or rainbows, or something that isn't filled with blood!"
"Rabbits are full of blood, but what kind of horror movie would go around killing rabbits I means, they are so small not enough guts-"
"Enough! Please live their insides out of this," Ryou replied rubbing his temple, "You really need to work on this obsession with gore."
"Well if I can't watch bloody movies, and I can't take over the world, then what else is there to do with my free time?"
The lights flashed off, in the pitch black a child's voice could be heard, "No that albino vampire guy is gonna kill us, save me!" Though before anyone was murdered the lights clicked back on, to reveal a movie lobby covered in fake green Christmas trees, and a multitude of light chains. The employees all wore Santa hats, and Bakura himself had a large green and red bow tied around his neck.
"Ryou..." he growled his voice dangerously low, "What the fuck just happened?"
"Uhm..." Was the only reply as Ryou examined the plushie deer-antler headband that had just appeared on his head.
"..."
"Why do you look like deer?" Bakura said, completely unfamiliar with any semblance of Christmas tradition.
"Uhm.. I think it's for Christmas," Ryou replied, looking up at Bakura, and looking extremely adorable with his Christmas-themed costume.
"What's Christmas" Would have been Bakura's reply, if not for a loud 'POP' and both of them promptly appearing in a large tiled room. Through this quick space travel Bakura's sentence transformed into "What the fuck?" though it still started with the same word as before.
The magic around them chose that moment to disperse, dropping both of them into a fairly large, very cold pond.
Normal POV (In the kitchen):
"So," Mokuba started brightly, "Do you know how to make egg nog?" Utter silence followed this question. "Uhm, do you have any guesses?"
"Well its egg nog, so it has to have eggs and... nog?" Random girl said, almost entirely unhelpfully.
"What's nog?" Jou asked as he entered the room.
"I'm not sure, were trying to make a list of the ingredients, do you know any?" Random girl said.
"Rum, I heard them talking about it out in the hall," The blond said with a grin.
"Okay... eggs and rum, there has to be more then that, what about milk? Most recipes have milk in them," Mokuba said scribbling that down onto a sticky note.
"Yes I think milk is right, try cream instead though, everything Christmas related is very high fat," Anzu said as she walked in, draggin Yugi and Yami with her.
"Can anyone think of anything else?" Mokuba asked.
"What do you have so far?"
"Eggs, rum, and cream."
"Put something that starts with an 'n' in it, Egg nog, you need something with an 'n'."
"Nuts?" Suggested Random girl.
"Okay, lets crunch them and sprinkle it on top, who wants to do what?" They argued bit but it was then decided that Yugi and Anzu would make the eggs, Random girl and Yami would grind nuts, Jou would measure, and Mokuba would stir.
Malik soon joined the fray and 'helped' Jonouchi measure, in other words, he added quite a lot of booze. Seto walked in just as the nuts were being sprinkled over the 8 cups of their masterpiece.
Seto examined the glass that was handed to him, it had a rich white-brown color from the alcohol and cream, but was also filled with yellowish lumps that mostly sunk to the bottom and was covered quite thoroughly on top by groundnuts.
"Mokuba, Yami don't drink this stuff. The rest of you feel free to die of food poisoning." Kaiba stated lightly, setting his glass back on the counter.
"But big brother!" Mokuba whined, "We did it all very carefully, we cooked the eggs, and we mixed it all theroughly."
"You shoved scrambled eggs into a glass of beer and cream."
"GOD THIS STUFF IS NASTY!" Jono yelled, spitting his drink into the sink. "I don't understand how the Americans can drink this stuff.
Seto rolled his eyes and opened the fridge, pulling out a white container. He moved his hand to reveal a label in neat curt handwriting that said "Egg Nog." "Mokuba, if it was Christmas I would have made egg nog already and put it in the fridge."
"Ooh! Egg nog!" Mokuba ran up and took it pouring a glass for himself.
Malik laughed lightly as each person took a glass, his next comment going unheard, "And if I were a your Christmas party, I would've spiked the nog and put it in the fridge."
"Blond guy! Do you want egg nog?" Random girl asked, remembering names was never really her specialty. Malik smirked and nodded.
Well as it turned out Seto's nog ended up quite a lot better then the one the group made, and with a little boost on the alcohol, the multiple cups consumed each made them all more then a bit tipsy, all excluding Mokuba who ran off to play video games after his first glass.
"WHY THE HELL IS THERE A POND IN MOVIE THEATER!" This was what the group of teenager heard as they walked out of the kitchen.
"There are ducks in movie theater," Jou giggled.
"No there are ponds in a movie theater," Anzu corrected.
A dripping wet Bakura emerged a few doors down the hall looking ready to kill, and equally drenched Ryou was following. "Pharaoh, you've had you laugh now your going to pay!"
"Egg nog is efito-it efitosomethingably good," Yami said with an odd grin. At this Bakura started laughing, momentarily forgetting he was soaked.
"Your drunk! HAHAHAHA," In other words he was rather amused.
"Ya want de Amer-i-can drink?" Jou slurred
"Uhm, I really don't think we should be having alcohol, I mean, we just appeared in your house, and it suddenly turn Christmas," Ryou said, looking around at his group of friend with worry.
"Oh come on, give it a rest, life is much more fun when you're seeing it through the eyes of a drunk person, its a bit more blurry but definitely more fun. Bring on the alcohol!" Bakura stated.
As they tuned to head back into the kitchen, he noticed a white haired teen, he yanked on the long ponytail forcing the head backwards. He was met with his own chocolate eyes staring back at him. "What. the. fuck." Arukab slipped out of his double's grasp turning to face him.
"Hi, I'm Arukab," he said, looking curiously at Bakura, "Oh! That's why you look like me, you must be Bakura! It's really great to meet you! Malik always talks about how much more he likes you then me!"
"What. the. fuck."
"I'm your clone! ."
"I need something to drink, preferably something to get me drunk." With that Bakura went into the kitchen, if not for the shock he would've killed his clone. Ryou and Arukab were left alone in the hallway.
"Am I your clone too? Malik never mentioned another me."
"Uh.. no I'm Ryou it's nice to meet you, do yourself a favor and don't let Bakura kill you, it's going to be a long night."
And with those words they both went into the kitchen to consume eggnog, and to continue their Christmas in July.
TBC
Here you go jess, you can write part of the Author note thing if you wanna, I just finished up with this story and it took quite a bit off time, as soon as I get this back reviews will be answered and this chapter will finally be updated! YAY! Okay tell me what you think, just push the little button, then you know what to do. I love you guys, you're what keeps this story going. Oh and one last note, I know there were at least 3 people in the past who have advised dictionaries, grammer, editting and other things of that sort. I also know that my review replied to said people were never all that polite. I just wanted to let those people know that I do apreaciate the reviews, and that this is my first ever poasted story as well as my first fanfic, I guess I was just a bit touchy, so thanks for the comments, and I really should have done a better job editting.
So ppl what do we all think? Siiarrei (Stina) did a pretty good job. All or most questions have been answered in rather amusing ways but good all d way so we all kno what to do. Hop to it, Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was this story! R&R plz ppl Stina needs it! Muah ... cakes 4 all who review! ; And Stina will provide them bye!
lll runs as fast as she can
Jess! I am NOT giving out cake! Come back here! (Uh I'll feed the characters cake in the next chapter, thats the best I can do, the mailing fees would be hell and I'm not rich!)
Reveiw please people! I'll try to update soon, ANY ideas are welcome, even if they are stupid or very very useless, I can get inspired by many a thing.
:Review Replies:
EnuNR-zero: Hehe, thanx Kaity I don't mind that you reviewed late, I'm just glad you got it in befor emy update, review this chapter too okay? (thanks for all the insperation by the way)
Purplereader: Uh sorry I didn't sign the patition thing, she seemed to update okay on her own, nice screenname by the way.
Mistress-Shadowkat: I hope your having fun with the Japonese learning, we haven't emailed in forever and I will make your b-day story soon! I'm so sorry I forgot! Thanks for the review!
serius'sheelah: There's my update, thank you so much for reviewing, so glad you liked it!
NightoftheShadows: Hmm.. "why does Yami keep asking why Malik is there and he shows up?" well lets see, probably because I needed a way to introduce Malik, and because this story is great for random and repdative character lines. Thank you so much for the review, and I haven't decided if there will be a lemon or not, I don't know if I could write one, but I might try. Thank you very much, funny was what I was going for, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
Marina-Kashu: Wow, it's good to know I'm not crazy, Mokuba Kaiba always struck me as a messed up name. I think I already sent you an email saying you can use the private room all you want, if I didn't then I said it here: feel free to use it to your hearts content and thank you for asking, Enjoy!
Emarista the Torturer: Hahaha very nice review Celina, I'll try to make something happen just for your benafit (and because a few other people asked me to) I loved the review:D! (hugs)
voyuerer: "I loved that everyone is using that word like it a reall word just to not look dumb" thank you, remember that fact it'll show up again a bit later in this story.
peach: Yes the bird is quite odd, I just made that bird thing up with the help of sugar a friend and a sleepover the idea just came to me. "this story just has a twist unlike some of the stories i read" Thank you very much for that comment, I used up the mushy love stuff really early on in the story so I've just being going on random to find something to keep it going and to eventually bring it to a close.
Mariks-Gurl21: THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR HELP! You are the great person who got me to write as well as the person who helped remove so many spelling errors, I love ya Jess, your a good beta/muse. :D
Ashley: "I'm going to have the word efitoblikable in my head and vocab. for a while" Believe me I understand, after writting this story I will never forget how to spell the word efitoblikable, and it will apear in random sentances, my friends all find it quite funny actually. Thanks for reviewing! Feel free to do so again!
Tapku: Yes I updated! yay! hmm you don't like lemons, I don't really care wither way on them, I'll be sure to put up warnings so that you and some other people who don't like them can just skip ahead, that is If I write one, which might not happen, and probably wont.
Wandering Violets: I finally updated! hmm, you have a new acount, I didnt notcie that I thought Thryin was the only one, oh well. Thanks for reviewing!
Anime-Blade: hehe, really glad you liked it, you guys have been reviewing thist story for quite a while, thanks for sticking with it, "How the heck did Mali-chan and Kura-kun end up there?" I hope this chapter answered that question. :D
Yugischic08: Thanks for the review! you had the qestion "is seto and yami actually goingt o go all the way sometime?" The truth is I'm not sure, I'm thinking they might but I am in no way sure.
AngelicTransmition: "and i wanna be like u -pouts- but i cud never be" (goes all teary eyed) You really like me that much? Oooh I love you! (millions of hugs) And I'm sure if you keep practicing you'll be great! Thank you so much for the review, this was one of the first I looked at after starting to like my story again and it made me so happy and REALLY made we want to write, thank you so much!
Mimi: "are bakura and malik lovers in your story?" that was one of your questions, and the answer is no, I'm not really sure about pairings other then the ones specified. Anzu likes Yami, Yami and Seto are in love, Jou likes Seto, Yugi likes Jou, and Bakura and Ryou will probably be togeter but maybe not, either way, Seto/Yami is the main pairing. Thanks for the review!
mellinde: Thank you! I love reviews, I hope you liked it!
Tora Macaw: "One must indeed wonder why guys have female swimsuites" Well, I haven't a clue why, but hey you never know:D Thank you for review, I love your reviews!
Okamihanyou-Lin: Yay! I'm so glad you liked it, keep on reading and reviewing, I hope this is as funny as the last!
Arisa-san: "and of course the girl swimsuits are Kaiba's X's right? i mean he wasnt ALWAYS gay." Noo yaoi rox! uhm, he got them from a crazy great grandparent who thought he was a girl, uhm yeah thats it! Of course Malik likes being a pain! It's his job! Yay for long reviews, love you tons talk to you soon (actuallys your in the same room so we can mind talk hahahah!) okay erm byebye wuv you.