Disclaimer: I own nothing but the shirt on my back, which happens to be a loan.

Authors Notes: Nothing really at all to say, except maybe…anyone else notice the increase in Bleach fics lately? Anyway, off we go.

History and Her

Chapter Five: Summarizing Nothing (Part One)

J-Pop annoys the hell out of me, I have very specific music tastes…except in the shower, Puffy Ami Yumi and Two Mix all the way.

"The king of Naruki has returned…hello?" huh, my parents aren't home? Oh well, must be some kind of business thing or something. I'm in high school; I'm permitted not to care by General Hormone and Rear Admiral Puberty. I see a note, a note with love no doubt, giving the details of…lets see, skim down, skim down, something about a bank transaction, meeting, an appointment…ah, frozen food thawing in the sink. You might be thinking that I'm kind of absent minded to look over the list without a real thought, but there is a reason: my parents are busy people, and I'd rather not slow them down.

Before dinner of delectable delights can be commenced, I think I should shower and at least try to scare my homework into thinking I'll do it. Up some stairs, down a hall, through a door and a collapse into a crappy comfortable chair…you have entered the lair of Keigo Asano-Sama.

"What a day…what a day…" I can hear myself mumble. Tired does really no justice in describing how I'm feeling at this moment. School was homicide (or is that suicide?) forgetting that psychotic dream I had, I didn't just have one talk with a girl to worry about…oh no…the assorted Lords of assorted religions wouldn't allow that…I had to have three talks…better sit back this'll be a long one…oh, before I start, might as well pop in some Beatles…"Nowhere Man" suits me okay…heh…"Nowhere Man, A Theme of Keigo Asano".

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"Damn it, where the hell's Ichigo…probably chasing Rukias skirt again."

"Yeah definitely…wanna get lit?" I look behind me back into Lannoms class room and find none other than The Bearded one himself.

"Uh, no thanks, I have to go…to go…well, you're stoned now, right?" what the hell? Corner him with his own logic.

"And how." He replies with a knowing smile, except he was now facing a wall, so close that his nose was planted as firmly as possible on it. Picking up my stuff I get the hell outta Dodge as fast I can from that class. I end up, naturally, back in the hallways. Deserted now, except for the few guys and girls who prefer indoors to outdoors, which I think is weird, I mean come on. We're allowed a certain amount of time outside, why not use it? Mine and theirs I guess. Shit, where's Tatsuki? Thought she wanted to talk…oh wait, I saw her with Orihime…laughing it up with her…so forget it, my rack isn't quite as big as hers so…

"Shit, locker or lunch?" hey, who gives a crap if those indoors people hear me, not like they listen to me in any other capacity, so they can politely and heroically screw off. You might be wondering what the issue is, really nothing, except my locker is about a bloc's distance from where I usually eat with my friends. I can either relieve some of my spinal compressing or eat my lunch…it's one or the other dear friends. At least, that was the idea, until…

"Asano-San." Damn, only one guy actually addresses me with that kind of formality.

"Hey…Ishida…uh…san." Man, this guy makes me nervous. More than actual bullies, this guy just has the face of a cold blooded killer. Of course, Ishida isn't really some kind of maniac, has to be just my imagination.

"I was wondering if…if maybe…this is kind of hard to ask but…" I nearly felt my neck break from the near double, no, triple take it did. Uryuu Ishida actually looks…unsure…and nervous? Bear in mind that's nervous and unsure for him which constitutes a slight twitch in his eyes.

"…you need something Ishida uh San?" coughing a bit, Ishida looks at me directly. Man those eyes look like damn fires of the pits of hell…I need to lay off Spawn for a bit.

"I need your…your advice Asano-San." My heart stopped, I mean it frikkin stopped. The stock markets have crashed, Sega is the number one console and Nintendo actually has a foreseeable online gaming future…nothing makes sense!

"You need my…what?"

"Your advice Asano-San, I need your help regarding something…annoying." Is this for real, why the hell would the smartest guy in school, scratch that, the nation be asking me for anything other than help out to his car for his groceries?

"What do you need?" hell, no way I sound that calm. Motioning with his head, I follow the genius of geniuses (geniusi?) We're eventually at the top of one of the schools buildings, ringed by a barbed gate (ah, what they do to keep us animals in!). Naturally, being up means being able to look down on people, and chic- girls. I've caught Mizuiro up here a few times. Hell I used to do it to even used to help Mizuiro drag Ichigo up here but then I kind of...grew out of it for lack of a more attractive term.

"You spy on girls, Ishida-San?" pain in the ass honorifics, why did I even bother joking with this guy, I already know that he'll-

"Don't be ridiculous Asano-San, look out over there please." Knew it, the guys got Ichigos' sense of humor but at least Strawberry throws a bone every now and then! Deciding and knowing that I have now no time to go either to my locker or to lunch with my buds, I realize my whole lunch is a wash. Why not humor the humorless huh?

"…so, what's the problem, Ishida...damn…san?" I mumble the curse, keep in mind my own parents don't use honorifics. The guy in question steps up next to me (was that a chill is this guy made of ice?)

"If it bothers you that much, you can drop the 'san'. Anyway, that's the problem, over there." He says, pointing out towards…a girl? Ishida likes girls?
"Orihime? What's wrong with her, you have a crush on her or something?" Ishida makes a light cough again.

"No, but she keeps bothering me." I wait for something more…but…he doesn't say anything else.

"Bothering…you? Like how?"

"She keeps…talking to me, inviting me to be with…well, your group pretty much." I should be offended and I kind of am but forget it, I'm too hungry to be that pissed.

"I take it that's a problem?"

"…I mean no offense, it's just…I value my privacy and I would like her…like her…to stop. I don't need any…any more friends." Huh, this guy really doesn't want our company…like he's scared or something. Man I wish I was smarter…just so I could help this guy or just tell him something to cheer the hell up or something helpful. Nothings really said for a little bit, I can feel a breeze. Turning my head I can see the sun just beginning to recede.

"Asano Sa…Asano, can you help me?" about three blinks later and I realize I'd just been staring out at the horizon for who knows how long.

"You can just call me Keigo, man. It's no problem. What do you need me for?" Ishida nods once and looks out.

"I've heard or rather over heard that you are an expert on…repelling girls." I can feel my ego, my manhood, my dignity, my pride etc. etc. etc….all fall down.

"R-r-really? Who told you that I wonder?" as if I had to take a frickin guess. Ichigo and Chad can kick my ass if they want to but Mizuiro's going to be properly introduced to my foot in his ass.

"That's not important. What's important is that you get Orihime away from me." This guy serious? Most guys (up until a little while ago, me included) would run towards Orihime not from. Hell, I'm still not sure whether I could resist Orihime should the situation come up. The wind kicks up again.

"Alright man, no problem I'll work the apparent Asano anti-cavorka." I say, waving him off and walking off toward the remains of a civilized lunch. Then, the guys in front of me, with his hand extended.

"…Ishida?"

"Thank you…Asa…Keigo. You're a fan of American pop culture, right? I understand Westerners shake hands to seal a pact."

"A…pact?" I look at his face, then his hand. "Alright Ishida, it's a pact." I shake his hand and suddenly fear him breaking it off for some reason. Cool cross bracelet though. From there the two of us separate, me going to the door, him being…stoic.

"Keigo?" almost to the door, damn it all to the early to mid Nineties!

"Yeah?" he shifts his glasses (is that guy flipping me off?) and looks at me again, see something you like smart guy?

"Thank you. I will repay you for this." I nod and smile. And then I'm walking down the stairs again. Thinking about it; his promise to repay me sounded more like a threat.

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And just like that, The Beatles finish out "Rubber Soul". Have I been flashbacking that long? Oh great, the memories of what I actually should be doing is coming back…I have to eat dinner, shower and do my homework. So I'll get back to you after I eat and shower…you know the important stuff.

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"Me…needs…the foods…badly!" I recall muttering somehow, rushing through the halls towards my lunch place. Through the rush of antisocial kids, those who hate the outside, the club goers, the library people and all the other lovable clichés that Fox and The WB shoved down the old wind pipe, I get to my watch…oh super good, nine minutes left for lunch.

Then, the unmistakable sound of sneakers screeching to a halt on tiled floor, along with a pair of hands smacking a certain forehead.

"My History book, I left it in the Beardos' class!" Looking around and around for some kind of quick and all encompassing solution…it's not there. Check the watch, down to seven and a half minutes. Going back, I have to go back to Kinue's class even though I know he's probably too lit to even answer his door.

Suddenly I feel something. Like in all those cheesy anime, I feel a presence, no, not a fighting presence for me to unsheathe my big sword against, no, it's the presence of a certain girl. A girl, who kind of plays for another team so to speak, I really have no idea how else to put it without offending someone out there, even though I know I already have.

"Hey Chizuru, what's going on?" I turn, and luckily I don't make an ass of myself because it is actually her there. She looks a little surprised but then smiles all the same.

"Hey Keigo, got a minute?" she asks, pouring on enough sugar that I can feel my teeth crack…the bad sugar not that good stuff in Cherry Pepsi, that stuff rocks.

"Apparently, yeah, what's up?" slight exaggeration, my watch says I have about five and a quarter or something minutes left. (I hate analog, my parents say digitals are for kids though.)

"I was wondering…" she says, stretching every verb, every consonant, and every other part of speech I know about to the nth degree.

"Yeah?" what the hell is she going to ask me? At the rate I'm going today I won't be surprised if she asks me to off Tatsuki just so she can get to Orihime "Hime" as she calls her (That fact courtesy of Mizuiro and the fact that Chizuru likes to broadcast herself.).

"You want to go out some time?" Sega has just released a console that beat the crap out of Sony, Nintendo has kicked Microsoft off its online gaming throne, Batman has crossed over to Marvel for good and I just found out a man can have two heart attacks in one day.

To Be Continued

Authors Notes: Took awhile, huh? Hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and don't worry, there is much more to this situation then you think! Now on to the reviews:

Megumi Watanabe: Thank you for the review and your support, I really appreciate someone reading, let alone liking my jumble of words. I look forward to your thoughts on this chapter, as well as your opinions, thank you again.

GreekGeek81: Heh, you liked the Big O thing huh? I'm a die hard fan and was climbing the walls trying to get it to mesh with this story. You think Keigos' a fan? Anyway, glad you enjoyed the chapter and hope this one lives up. By the way, if you like references, I'll try (and been trying) to get in as many as possible.

StormBlazer: Hey thank you for the review and the kind words. I see where you're coming from though on Keigos character and I wonder if I'm anyway near to what Kubo imagined? Nah, oh well. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and I look forward to any future feedback from you.

Well, now, boys and girls, it's been fun but its now time to collapse. See you all when I see you.