Kirsten was literally a nervous wreck at work. Her hands were shaking, her chest was tight. She'd taken a few shots of vodka to calm her, but it didn't seem to be working. She tried to focus on the work she had in front of her, but he mind kept wandering. Throwing her pen down angrily, she reached into her drawer, and took an extra long sip. Sitting back, she let the burning liquid run through her body. She had made such a mess of everything.

Sandy walked into Kirsten's office, flowers hidden behind his back. He knocked on her door lightly.

"Come in" he heard her reply. He walked in smiling, pulling the flowers out from behind him.

"Hi Sandy" she said, forcing a small smile.

"These are for you…" She took them, still smiling slightly.

"Thank you, they're beautiful"

Sandy leaned in, kissing her softly on the lips. He pulled back quickly, and odd look on his face.

"Have you been drinking?" he said crossly.

She panicked. She hadn't even given the fact she'd been drinking all day a second thought. She was guessing the vodka smelt and tasted pretty strongly.

"Kirsten…?" he asked again when she didn't answer.

She didn't know what to say. Now would be a good time to confess to everything. She considered it, but knew that it wasn't going to happen. Not today anyway.

"No of course not" she lied, feigning shock.

Sandy looked at her, knowing very well that she was lying to him. He didn't know what to think. She'd never lied to him before. It then suddenly dawned on him.

"Is this what Seth is so cut up about?"

"Excuse me?" she said, raising her eyebrows.

"Your drinking Kirsten. Is that why you two had a fight?" He waited for a reply, but got nothing. So he continued on.

"Is that why our own son has been crying, but doesn't want to talk to me about it? Is that why he had to leave early this morning so he didn't have to face any of us?" Sandy exploded, his emotion for his son coming out.

Kirsten closed her eyes for a second, holding her tears back.

"It's got nothing to do with that" she said quietly.

"Kirsten…talk to me. I don't know what to do anymore. Surely you can see that your drinking has gotten out of control? And it's not just affecting you; it's affecting all of us."

"I don't have a problem Sandy" she snapped.

She was cut off by her phone, and she shot Sandy a look.

"I'll wait" he said, folding his arms.

"Hell, Kirsten Cohen" she said, rolling her eyes. "Oh hi Ryan…Is everything ok? What? No, No, you stay at school, I'll take care of it. Thanks for letting me know…Bye"

"What, what is it?" Sandy asked hurriedly, knowing something was up.

"Ryan said Seth took off from school in between his classes. He said he was acting strange, and wouldn't tell anyone where he was going."

"Great" Sandy muttered sarcastically.

"Don't worry Sandy, I'll go find him. You go back to work" she said, fumbling for her keys.

"I don't think so" he said, grabbing her keys from her. "Not if you've been drinking."

"Fine. We'll both go" she said, too worried to argue with him.

Seth let himself inside the house, locking the door behind him. He threw his keys on the table, and pulled the bottle of vodka out of his bag. Opening the lid, he smelt it, jerking his head back fast. How did people drink this stuff? He put the bottle to his lips, letting it enter his mouth, and wash down his throat. He began coughing and spluttering, his throat burning with a horrible taste. He put the bottle on the bench. What was he doing? This wasn't him. What was he trying to prove? As the thoughts rushed through his head, he realized he was doing this for her. He wanted to know why she did it. He wanted to know what it felt like. Picking up the bottle again, he began to drink. The more he drank…the less horrible it tasted

Kirsten and Sandy drove to a few spots where they knew Seth hung out. The skate park, the beach, the pier; but he was no where to be seen. After Sandy suggested trying home, Kirsten rang their home number.

"No one's answering" she said, the phones still attached to her ear.

"I still think we should check it out."

Kirsten nodded, looking at her husband. He looked worried. He looked stressed. He looked tired.

"I'm sorry Sandy" she said quietly.

"Sorry for what?"

"Everything" she sighed. "You put up with a lot more than you should have to"

"I don't put up with anything. I love you Kirsten, you know that. I love you more than anything, and I always will."

"I know. I'm still sorry though."

Sandy smiled sadly, getting the hint that his wife really did have a big problem here.

Seth sat on his bed, the loud music he had on blasting through his ears. He took another swig of the bottle, frowning when he saw there was only a little bit left. Everything felt better now. His head and thoughts were fuzzy, and his whole body felt tingly. It was definitely a feeling he'd never had before. Drinking the rest of the bottle, an idea formed in his head. He did this because he wanted to know what his mother was feeling…so why not try to understand that little bit more? Fumbling through his drawer, he took out the razor he hid the other day. If she did it…then so would he. He dragged the blade across his left wrist a few times, and then watched as the blood seeped out. He didn't even feel it. He couldn't feel anything right now.