oOo

Elizabeth stopped at the doorway of Rodney's lab, followed by John. They were both out of breath. She saw Rodney crouched on the floor, hovering over the ball device where it had been dropped. With a goofy grin, he looked up at her. "I'm not dead!" he said triumphantly, spreading his arms wide.

Elizabeth couldn't stop the smile that lit up her face. "Really?"

"You doubt me?" Rodney replied, a smug grin on his face. "Look, there's Ancient writing inscribed all over this device." Elizabeth crouched down next to Rodney, and John did the same, though his expression clearly showed he had no clue why he was doing it. "What's the one thing the Ancients were obsessed with?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "Their war with the Wraith."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "Okay, well, besides that."

Elizabeth's eyes lit up in realization. "Ascension."

"Exactly!" Rodney pointed to her emphatically. "I'm not dead, I'm ascended!" After a moment's pause, he amended, "Partially…anyway, that's not the point. We need to get Zelenka down here so we can start figuring out a way to reverse its effects."

Elizabeth immediately tapped her radio. "Dr. Zelenka, this is Weir."

"I'm here," the Czech's voice buzzed in her ear.

"I need you to report to Dr. McKay's lab as soon as possible."

There was a pause before she heard his voice again, a little sadder this time. "I'll be right there."

Rodney was one again engrossed in studying the device. "It's really quite fascinating. I think once we translate these engravings, we'll find—" The finger Rodney had been using to point at the symbols touched the surface of the ball, but instead of passing through, it seemed to shift the ball slightly. Elizabeth and Rodney both looked at each other, eyes wide.

John raised one eyebrow, and pointed at the ball warily. "Did that thing just…"

Rodney cocked his head sideways. "Huh." Without warning Rodney reached out and grabbed the ball, then quickly stood.

Seeing the device leap into the air, apparently of its own volition, was too much for Sheppard. With a loud exclamation of "What the—!" he jumped back about three feet, crashing into a shelf full of alien technology. Several devices fell to the floor, and some even activated, filling the room with light and sound. John tried to catch several in midair, failing miserably. He recklessly grabbed at the devices on the floor and attempted to hastily reshelf them while simultaneously shutting them off. At least, that's what Elizabeth supposed he was doing, but to her it looked more like a frantic tangle of limbs, or possibly a seizure.

"Major, be careful! That's highly sensitive equipment!" McKay roared.

John slammed his palm down on the last device, silencing its quick-like beeping. Without turning around, he said, "He's yelling at me right now, isn't he?"

"Oh, how very astute of you, Major 'I'm too good for Mensa' Sheppard."

"Yes," came Elizabeth's simple reply.

John whiled around, a huge smile plastered to his face. "Rodney, if you weren't a ghost right now, I'd kiss you!"

"Well, thank god for small miracles," he replied, disgusted.

"I take it you believe me now, Major?"

At that moment, Zelenka walked into the lab, his tired eyes downcast. "Elizabeth, I am so sorry to hear, I—sakra!" Radek jumped backwards in much the same manner as Sheppard had seconds before, except that Radek tripped over the edge of a desk, sending him sprawling backwards to the floor.

John frowned at the sight. "Please tell me I didn't look like that."

"Of course not, Major," Rodney replied sarcastically, despite the fact that Sheppard couldn't hear a word of it. "Your reaction was graceful flailing."

Elizabeth helped Zelenka back into a standing position. He adjusted his crooked glasses, but it didn't at all detract from his puzzled expression. "What is going on?"

"We think this device may have caused Rodney to partially ascend," Elizabeth explained.

Zelenka stared at the 'levitating' device, dumbstruck. "Really? That's…"

"Fascinating?" Rodney offered.

"A little disturbing," Radek finished. "How is someone like McKay allowed to ascend?"

Rodney shot him an annoyed glare. "My, what touching sentiments for a dead man. I'm definitely have you write my eulogy," he deadpanned.

"I thought you said you weren't dead, Rodney?" Elizabeth asked.

He disregarded her concern blithely with a wave of his hand. "Yes, yes, semantics. Now, what we need to do is have Zelenka start analyzing the electromagnetic output frequency using the spectroscopic emission array, preferably recalibrated to an error margin of point seven percent." Rodney paused expectantly, then glanced at Elizabeth's gaping expression. "Well? Tell him, Elizabeth."

Elizabeth continued to stare at him in slack-jawed confusion. "Rodney, I may speak six languages, but I can assure you that none of them are technobabble."

At that, Zelenka piped up. "Ah, he is trying to give orders, I think. Allow me," he offered, lazily. "He wants me to analyze device's frequency output using this array." He placed his hand on a large, complicated-looking machine with lots of blinking lights and dials. "And since McKay never wants anything done easy way, he most likely wants it recalibrated," he added with a sigh. "Any preference?"

Elizabeth looked at Rodney, who was simply staring at Zelenka with his mouth open, blinking. After a few stunned seconds, McKay shook himself out of his stupor long enough to respond to Zelenka's question. "Ah, yes. Point seven, actually." Elizabeth relayed that information, and Radek immediately went to work setting up his laptop and turning dials on the machine. Rodney hovered over his shoulder a moment, and when he seemed satisfied that the other scientist wouldn't break anything, he turned his attention to Weir.

"Elizabeth, I have a job for you, too."

"Great," she smiled, happy to help. "As long as it isn't translating technical jargon."

Rodney looked dubious. "Well, it is, but not the way you think. Considering this is an Ancient device, they most likely kept a record of it somewhere. I need you to look through the Ancient database on ascension research and see if you can find any reference to the device." She nodded, and the lab became a flurry of activity. Elizabeth was busy connecting her laptop to the Ancient database, Zelenka was engrossed with his dials and readouts, and Rodney was pacing as he gave orders, carrying the ball with him. Again addressing Elizabeth, he said, "Maybe you can figure out why this is the only thing I can touch, when nobody else—"

Rodney stopped abruptly as he passed through Zelenka, neither one paying attention to where they were going. However, while Rodney was able to pass through Radek without the Czech noticing, the device was not. Zelenka let out a yelp of surprise when the ball bounced off his chest and landed in his empty hands. The entire room held its breath expectantly. When nothing seemed to happen, Zelenka cracked one eye open slightly. "Am I dead?" he asked. He was met by a pair of shaking heads, but his relief quickly gave way to anger. "McKay, is not good idea to kill only person on Atlantis who can save your sorry ass! Don't you have enough problems without throwing Disco Ball of Death at me!" he roared at nothing in particular.

"Oh, you're fine." Rodney dismissed him casually, but his relief was apparent. He plucked the device from Radek's hands with only a half-hearted objection from the Czech. McKay snapped his fingers in his "I've got it!" gesture. "Of course! It's touch activated, but it needs someone with the gene to activate it! I had just assumed that once it was active it would respond to any touch, but this makes more sense." He looked at Elizabeth triumphantly. "They didn't want Wraith to be able to activate their technology, much less ascend! So this device only responds to someone it deems worthy of ascension, namely someone it perceives to be an Ancient! That's why it didn't activate when Zelenka touched it!"

"Wait a minute," Elizabeth interjected. "I don't have the gene, either. So how come I was affected?"

Sheppard answered for him. "Well, you were touching the device when McKay activated it. Maybe it got confused."

"Yes, thank you Major. Very helpful," Rodney replied sardonically.

Elizabeth ignored the exchange. "So, Major, if you were to touch this…"

"I could be dead and annoying McKay as we speak," he answered with a smirk. This earned a derisive snort from Rodney.

"Major, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave. I can't take the risk of both you and Rodney ending up in this state."

John clearly objected to her decision. "What? Elizabeth, I'm a big boy now, I think I can handle keeping my hands to myself."

"I'm not saying you'd do it intentionally, but you saw what happened to Dr. Zelenka."

"So? Rodney didn't do that on purpose! And he'll be more careful from now on, won't you?" He addressed the last part to the floating ball. Without waiting for Elizabeth to relay his answer, he motioned to the ball moving animatedly through the air. "See?"

Zelenka scoffed. "You didn't even hear what he said!"

"No," John shrugged. "But I trust him."

"Well, I'm asking you to trust me." Elizabeth's voice betrayed her lack of patience. Collecting herself, she placed her hand on Sheppard's arm. "John, please. Let us work. I'll call you if we learn anything new."

They stayed locked in silent battle, her hand on his arm, for several moments, until Sheppard finally gave in. "Fine. But I want updates!"

"Understood, Major," Elizabeth nodded. With one last reluctant look at where he was sure Rodney stood, he turned and exited the lab. Breathing a sigh at his departure, Elizabeth faced the two remaining men. "Gentlemen," she said, "let's get to work.

oOo