- Here is the chapter some of you guys been waiting for so long. I'm sorry I didn't update my story sooner. I had so many things going on in life that it's hard to concentrate my story.

- Thanks 4 the reviews People! Love ya! I know my story ( some of you think) is really 'cliched' but what the heck? If some of you guys love it then I don't think the cliched will be a problem, right? RIGHT!

-Hope you guys will love this chapter!

- To a certain friend of mine, thanks 4 d ideas!

Chapter 4- What she realised

Freddy watched as Angel walked up the stairs to her room. He had a strange yet calm feeling inside of him when Angel gave him a smile. He looked at the bandage that she tied around his wrist. She made him feel nothing but butterflies in his stomach since the day he first saw her. - That doesn't mean anything, does it? – Freddy thought to himself everytime he saw her. He glanced up at the clock on the wall. It was already 11.25 at night. He suddenly changed his mind about staying over for another night there. So he went up to tell Zack about it. Zack was too busy on the phone with Katie that he didn't bother asking why Freddy suddenly had to leave. Actually, Freddy himself didn't know the reason. He just felt like it.

Angel woke up the next morning a happy person. She was more than glad after the 'breaking up' event last night except when Freddy got hurt. That part made her feel guilty. Angel washed up, got dressed and went down to the kitchen for breakfast. Zack was already up and he was in the kitchen having a bowl of cereal.

" Hey! You're up early today. Where's your friend? " Angel said while getting a carton of milk out from the fridge.

She noticed that Zack was playing with his food. He looked really down in the dumps. "What's wrong?" she asked, curious.

"Oh, nothing. Nothing at all," Zack sighed.

"I know there must be something that's bothering you. Come on. Spit it out," Angel said while pouring herself a glass of milk.

"Fine. You really wanna know? I have a big problem with the band, okay? I really thought I could handle it but—it's just too hard! I'm not a well organised person and I really don't like to be the so called leader of the band!" Zack admited.

Angel was quite surprised after he told her that. She always thought he could handle things like that. She took a small sip of milk before she continued talking. "What seems to be the problem?" she asked.

Zack gave out another loud sigh. " Katie just called me last night. She told me that she might not be back for the competition, "

"Wait. Your band is joining a competition?" Angel asked excitedly.

"Yea. As I was saying. She called me up and told me there is a posibility that she wouldn't be back on time for the competition. After that, Lawrence our keyboard player--" before Zack could even finish, Angel cut it- again!

"You guys have a keyboard player?" Angel asked.

Zack rolled his eyes. " Do you want to do the explaining for me or what?"

Angel gave him her 'hehe' smile.

"Well, Lawrence who is in China now said he might not be coming back—at all!" He said in anger. At the end of his explanation, he banged the wooden table with his fist.

Angel didn't know what to do or what to say. Her words got all mixed up in her thoughts. Zack got up and left the kitchen leaving Angel there. She was thinking of what to say to him and make him feel cheered up. She walked out of the kitchen and spotted Zack sitting on the couch in the livingroom. He was staring into the blank screen of the t.v.

Angel took a deep breath before she talked to Zack. She hoped he wouldn't lose his temper like just now.

" It's only temporary, right? I'm sure you can make things work out," Angel said while taking a seat next to him.

Zack gave her a doubtful look.

" I'll help you!" Angel suggested.

" What can you or me or anybody do when band members can't be back in time for a big competiton? Nothing!" Zack barked.

Angel glanced down at the floor. She really didn't know what to do or say to make him feel better " I don't know, Zack. I'm just trying to help you feel better, okay? I don't even know what I could do to help you with. I'm sorry," Angel said. Her voice quivered. The feeling of happiness got washed out from her at that very momment.

Zack gave out a sigh. He felt bad acting like a monster towards Angel. "Don't be sorry. I'm the one who should apologise to you for being such an ass. I didn't mean to act like that. In fact, you did make me feel a little better. I don't think that competition is that important. I know Dewey can understand that, "

" Dewey is that teacher of yours, right?"

Zack nodded 'yes'

"It's no use anyways if they did come back on time for the competition. The band's missing something and I don't know what it is! I don't think we stand a chance," Zack said, in doubt.

Angel smiled. "Don't worry. I think you guys do stand a chance winning that competition. I heard you guys the other day from upstairs and you guys sound amazing!"

"You're just saying that,"

"No, I'm not!" Angel shot back.

"Okay, whatever. But that doesn't mean we could win. I heard the competition is getting tougher by the year! More rivals and more pressure,"

"You're so caught up about winning but you don't have the confident for it," Angel said.

Zack didn't say anything to her because she was right. He didn't have the confident and he's such a doubtful person.

" I think you should just go on with the competition. Who knows? Something good might turn up. Maybe Katie will be back in time and Lawrence will be back too. I know you will find what's missing in the band. Soon as you realise that it's all in the fun that you have rather than winning. Have faith, Zack. Not doubt," Angel said.

Zack stared at her for a moment. Her advise made him see how Angel really cared about him. Although what he hopes for is impossible, he knew her hopes for him are more than what he thinks.

" I'll be upstairs in my room if you need anything," said Angel. She got up from the couch and went up to her room.

Angel was in her room leaning againts the wall doing nothing. After a while, there was a knock on the door. She opened it and saw Zack. He had a big grin on his face. It scared Angel. – First he was depressed! Now he's giving me one of his grins! What is happening to the world!- Angel thought. She gave Zack a weird look.

" Hey, thanks for the tip. It really helped," Zack said.

" Oh! No problem,"

There was a short silence. Then, Zack suddenly burst out laughing.

"What!" Angel asked in confusion.

" I just remembered. What's the deal with you and Freddy last night?"

" What you mean?"

" Did anything happen between you guys? Anything at all? He left for no reason last night," Zack asked with a smirk on his face.

" What are you talking about? Nothing happened last night. After I treated his bruises, I went up to my room. Don't get any wrong ideas!"

Zack laughed. " Okay. Anyways, Freddy and I are going to the skate park. You wanna come?"

"No thanks. Staying home alone will be great," replied Angel.

" Okay, then. Suit yourself. I'm leaving now,"

" Okay. See ya!"

Angel threw herself on the bed. It's already been half an hour since Zack left. "Staying home alone--SUCKS!" Angel shouted out. She regreted not going to the skate park with Zack but it was really weird for her going out in public where lots of people hang out especially during day time. She lay lifeless, bored. – There is nothing to do 'round here! I think I'm gonna die!- Angel groaned. She looked down at the floor where her collection of cd's were scattered. She picked them up and flipped through them. As she saw each cd she'll say, "Boring, boring, boring, boring—Ugh, yuck!" She threw them all back to the floor. All her cd's were given to her by her mother. They're all old, classical ballads. She didn't like them at all! Her mother forced her to listen to them because she didn't want Angel to listen to all those rock metal, hip hop, r n b, pop and other songs that she says corupts the mind of teenagers but Angel disobeys her sometimes. One time, she sneaked into a music shop and listened to samples of Kelly Clarkson, Bon Jovi, The Goo Goo dolls and The Black Eyed Peas. Unfortunately, her mother caught her in the act. That's when she got all the boring cd's. Angel yawned. –I'm bored, bored, bored, bored!- " Wait! Maybe Zack's got some cool cd's in his room. I'm gonna check it out,"

Angel got up from the bed and walked out to Zack's room. There was a sign on a door that says 'No Entry' but she pretended she didn't see it. Once she entered his room, "Oh my gosh! This room is like a pig sty! How can he live in an enviroment like this!". Zack's room was totally up side down. Both clean and dirty laundry were on the floor, books and papers on the computer desk, posters of his favourite bands on the wall. Angel spotted some cd's on his bedside drawer. She struggled to get through the place. She sat on his bed. Before she took the cd's she saw a picture in a frame with Zack's band together on his pillow. In the middle was Zack and Katie with their arms around each other. She then spotted Freddy. Dark blonde spiky hair and hazel eyes. His skin was pale but his cheeks were a little pinkish. She placed the picture down after observing everyone in it and then flipped through the cd's. " Good Charlotte, Foo Fighters, Yellowcard, Linkin Park—Limp Bizkit?" Angel thought all the band names were really weird but she took them all back to her room and played Yellowcard first. A song titled Ocean Avenue started playing. " Not bad," nodded Angel.

After the song played half way, she was already going crazy! She jumped on her bed and started singing along to the chorus of the song. She loved it!

If I could find you now things would get better

We could leave this town and run forever

Let your waves crash down on me and take me away

Zack came back home in the evening. Just as he entered the house, Angel was coming down the stairs with a headphone on and she was singing one of the Foo Fighters songs.

Because you're not the one but you're the only one
Who can make me feel like this
You're not the one but you're the only one
Who can make me feel like shit

Zack stared at her in amazement. His jaw dropped and eyes wide. – Angel is listening abd singing along to the Foo Fighters! –

Angel didn't notice him one bit. She was going to the kitchen and she just passed him like he wasn't even there. Zack closed the door behind him and crept behind her. In the kitchen Angel was still singing along to the Foo Fighters songs. She got a glass of milk and wanted to take a big gulp of it. Suddenly, she felt someone tap on her shoulder. She turned around and when she saw Zack, she spat the milk right at his face! "Oh, Za- Zack! I'm sorry! You're back early," Angel coughed. She tuned off her discman and took off the headphones. She handed Zack a clean towel from the kitchen counter. He grabbed it from her roughly and wiped his milky face with it.

"Hey! At least you got free facial," teased Angel with a giggle.

"Haha, Angel. Very funny," Zack said sarcasticly. Angel made a funny face at him.

"Were you just listening to what I think you just lisned to?" Zack asked with his eyebrows raised.

"Erm… Well…Fine! Yes! I was listening to what you think I listened to, okay! It's not a crime!"

Zack laughed. Suddenly, there was a weird look on his face. "Wait. I thought your mom never let you listen to all these type of songs. How'd you—Wait a minute. Are you listening to my cd?" asked Zack with a curios look on his face.

–Uh-oh! Big trouble- Angel didn't know what to say. In the end, she told him the truth. "Yes. They're your cd's--" Angel stopped. –Oh, no! Another BIG mistake!-

" What did you mean by 'They're all my cd's' ? Don't tell me—You went in my room!" Zack freaked.

Angel bit her lower lips. "Yea. I was really bored, okay? I just had to do something,"

" And invading a persons teritory and taking their stuff is one of em?"

" I'm sorry," Angel said, giving Zack her famous puppy pout which always work on in times of trouble.

" Pathetic!" Zack said with a chuckle.

- The puppy pout was worth a try- Angel thought. Okay, so the puppy pout is getting old.

" I don't blame ya'. Your mom is--how to put this? She's too strict with you. Try telling her to chill a lil'," said Zack.

- If only he knows how hard it is for me to cope with that. I don't think mom will ever listen to what I have to say! She's always busy and come to think of it—I missed the old times we had when she wasn't as busy as she is now, when she is always there when I need her--and when daddy was still around- Angel gave out a sigh. " Can I return the cd's when I'm done?" she asked Zack. He nodded 'yes'.

Angel walked downstairs to the kitchen to prepare dinner. She insisted on cooking after she borrowed Zack's cd's without his permission. Zack wasn't around that time. He went over to Freddy's house to get something. At least that was what he said. When she reached the last step, her cell phone rang. She answered it and her mother's voice responded. "Hey, mom! I missed you! So, how are things going in Malaysia?"

"Oh! Great, honey. Except the weather. It's really hot here. I'm sorry I didn't call you sooner. I've been very busy lately. So, how are things with you, dear? Is your uncle back yet?"

Angel rolled her eyes when her mother said the word 'busy'. She hated 'busy' so much.

"I'm good! Everything here is great. No, mom. He's not back yet. Zack told me he'll be back next month,"

" I'm gonna give that man a piece of my mind when I get back!"

" No, mom. It's fine! Zack's been a good parent. He really takes care of me,"

" Oh! Good to know. I've got great news for you,"

" What great news?" There was a strange look on Angel's face. She knew something bad was coming up even when her mom said it was 'great news'.

" I talked to your agent today and--" Her mom paused.

" And!" said Angel with frustration.

" And you get to do a Chanel advertisement! You're the youngest model that got the part! Isn't that great, Angel?"

" Cha- Chanel?"

"Yes! Oh, you finally reached your goal. I'm so happy for you,"

Angel was about to faint. She finally got her words together. "Mom. About that--" she said but her mom cut in.

" Oh, yea! The photo shoot is next month on a Sunday. I'll be back in time for it. I have to go now, honey. I've got so many things to do. Bye!"

"Mom?Mom! Oh, great. She hung up on me--again!" Angel threw her cell phone into the fish bowl next to her. Angel stood dumbstruck at the entrance of the kitchen. Her palms on her face and her eyes filled with tears. –She never listens to me! Why doesn't she ever listen to me!- Angel wanted to scream her head off!

"Was that your mom?" a voice came from behind her.

Angel quickly turned around and saw Freddy. She was so shock to see him there.

She wiped her tears and pretended to act normal.

" How long have you been standing there? Were you listening to my conversation?"

" Err…no," Freddy replied.

" You were, weren't you? What are you doing here anyways? Where's Zack?" said Angel. Her voice quivered. Freddy didn't say anything. Angel couldn't hold it back anymore. Tears started streaming down her cheeks. She was so upset she needed someone to talk to but Zack wasn't around that time. She walked towards Freddy and she cried on his shoulders. Freddy was shock though but he comforted her.

" You wanna tell me about it? We can talk," Freddy said, patiently. Angel nodded.

Outside at the porch, Angel was telling Freddy her problems. She didn't want to at first but she got a feeling that he can be trusted. Freddy listened to every word she said.

" I don't really like modeling and posing in front of the camera. I hate it a lot! I don't know why my mom put me into this. Modeling is her dreams not mine but she insisted that once I try it, I'll love it--but I don't!"

" You should tell her the truth. Try and think of a way that will make her listen to you," said Freddy.

" I tried everything! She wont listen to me! Ever since my dad got into that accident, she was always busy and didn't have time for me and ever since she got me into the modeling thing, who barely see each other! We're practically strangers!"

" I'm sorry to hear that," Freddy suddenly said.

" About what?"

" Your dad,"

" Oh,"

There was a long silence but Angel finally spoke.

" My dad died when I was only 10. He got into an auto accident on the way to my violin concert. He wasn't late but he wanted to be there when I play so he started to speed on the way to my school from work. Unfortunately, when he almost reached the auditorium, he ran a red light and because of that one tiny mistake of running a red light, he died. Before I went up on stage, my mom went back stage to see me. Her eyes filled with tears and sorrow. She was crying so hard but she managed to speak to me. It wasn't clear but I heard it and it felt like I was shot on the head by a gun. Mom told me I didn't have to go up on stage if I didn't want to but I was too stubborn. I thought I could do it. So, I acted like nothing happened and played my violin. It was a solo. But after half way, my tears started to run down my cheeks. I stopped playing and I ran back stage,"

" Is that why you stopped playing your violin?" Freddy asked.

Angel nodded.

" I think your dad didn't want that to happen,"

" Want what?"

" You to stop playing your violin. I think he wants you to continue. Don't blame yourself and give up something you love. Try and see the bright side instead of just taking a glance at it. Your dad really wants you to continue playing and you know that, right? He wants it more than you know. He doesn't want you to stop because of him," After Freddy said all those things, Angel thought about what he said for a long time. She felt like she made the bigest mistake of her life and only now that she realise it. She smiled at Freddy and hugged him tightly. Freddy had another big shock. Angel let him go and she started to blush. Her rosy cheeks were more pink than usual. "Sorry," she said, embarassed.

Freddy grinned. "It's fine,"

" Where's Zack? I thought he went over to your place," Angel asked.

" Oh, about that. He's still there playing the X-Box. He oddered me to come here and tell you to go there. My mom invited you guys over for dinner. So, you don't have to cook," explained Freddy.

" Couldn't he just call my cellphone?" asked Angel.

" I had to come back and take some of my stuff that I forgoten here last night. So I figured if I just come here and tell you at the same time,"

" Oh, really? Great 'coz I hate to cook," Angel replied.

Freddy laughed.

Dear, diary.

Todayt was an o-kay day. There were ups—and of corse downs. Zack lost his temper infront of me. He was soo frustrated about the band- thing. I tried cheering him up at first but it didn't work. I tried again and it did, a lil'. Phew! Anyways, I was sooo damn bored today! The funny thing is I risked my life breaking into Zack's room to take his cd's! LOL! I think he should put a sign up on his door that says ' Pig Sty. No Entry' instead of just 'No Entry'. I don't think anyone would enter if he really did! The songs I heard were cool. I didn't care about the bad words. It's just a sign of anger in the songs.

Mom called today! I'm gonna do an AD on 'Chanel'! Can you belive it! 'Chanel'! I think I'm gonna jump of a tall building! I'm not happy 'bout it at all! I can't belive her. She likes to do this to me! UGH! I threw my phone into a fish bowl after I was done talking to her. The phone still works but I'm still not happy. I don't know how many times I've tried talking to her. I guess I need to try harder. Maybe I'm just too afraid to admit to her how much she changed my life because I don't want to break her heart. Since dad left, I've been putting up with all her plans for me and it's everything that I don't want. It's not that I don't appreciate what she does for me, it's just that I feel like I'm living a lie. I'm living a life that's not lead by me. It's the other way 'round!

Another thing diary. Freddy over heard my conversation with MOM! OMG! I was angry at first but I really don't know what got into me! I walked to him and cried on his shoulders! WHY WAS I SUCH A STUPID GIRL! Luckily he was sweet about it. I'm actually glad he over heard it. He even gave me advise! It's Freddy to the rescue—AGAIN! Can you belive it! A PUNK ROCKER like him gave me such a good advise! I really appreciate what he did. Made me feel better. I think I'm gonna start playing my violin again. I know dad wants me to. LOL! Freddy made me realise that! I talked to him about dad. I told him how much pain it brings when I play my violin because of the memories in the past and that's why I stopped. He told me those memories shouldn't be locked up inside of me. Happy memories should always be remembered because they put a smile on your face. He even said not to look at them as something that hurts but as something I would always cherish and be happy about. I myself can't belive what came out from his mouth! Oh, yea! I accidently hugged him after he gave me advise and telling me all those stuff! HOW STUPID COULD I GET! I feel embarassed and STUPID!I hope this is the last time I tell you that, diary!

Freddy's mom invited us over for dinner and I didn't have to cook! Lucky me! On the way to Freddy's house, I talked to him 'bout some of my 'other' problems. Like how home schooling sucks, having really bad friends, how I wasn't a shy and 'innocent' type of girl when my dad was around and how my mom never gave me the freedom I deserve. I just felt like telling him. I needed to let out all those feelings before I start doing 'crazy' things to myself. He listened and told me I should stand up for myself and speak my mind and he's right. I think I've let mom do what she likes with my life til I'm the one falling apart!

Zack was suspicious 'bout Freddy and I. He kept asking us what took us so long. Both of us didn't tell him what happened though. Anyways, Freddy's mom made a great meal! I love home cooked dishes. Freddy's dad is really funny like he is too. Both of 'em crack me up. Zack and I stayed there 'til it was like almost 11 something! We played video games after helping tidy up the kitchen. I beat the guys LOADS of times! I know they didn't let me win on purpose 'coz they kept asking 4 a rematch everytime I win! HAH! I have a new hobby now. Playing video game rox! LOL! My fave game is SSX 3 and this type of car racing game. It's sooo cool! Okay, that's all diary! I think this is quite enough! Nites!

Angelxxx

-Dat's it guys! Well, for this chapter only. Don't worry! More exciting things comin UP! Just pray it's comin soooooooon!

- I know I made spelling MISTAKES. I'm so sorry!

-LOVE YA PEEPS!