A/N: I am so glad that you guys are enjoying the story. I'm writing chapter 35 as we speak. With the release of the DVD, I've found inspiration once again. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. Please read and review as always. I love to hear what you guys think.
Chapter 24 – Little White Lie
Angelina waited for a response but received none. It was as if Erik was pondering on what to tell her. He was afraid of either her reaction or the truth behind it all. She had just wanted to know why it held power over him.
"Erik, you do not have to tell me."
She rose and tore a piece of her dress. Dressing the wound, Erik stared off into space, not making eye contact with her. Her touch was gentle as she dressed his wound as a surgeon would. Her hand lingered upon his as his gaze finally met hers.
"I did not ask you to bring up memories from your past. I only asked you to find out why it hurts you so much. If it did not, your hand would not need to be bandaged."
The ring was gently placed back into his naked hand. She closed his fingers around it and watched as he drew his hand back to his chest. Pain was hidden behind his dark eyes. There were shadows of his past that she longed to know but was afraid to ask. There were shadows behind her eyes as well but Angelina knew they were well hidden.
"It was from a friend."
His voice was shaky and uncertain. She watched as he put the ring back into its box and back into its hiding spot.
"Erik, do not tell me…"
"It was from a dear friend. Nothing more."
"I understand."
His other hand, which was still covered by the worn leather glove, reached out and touched her cheek. A sense of longing captured her eyes and his. It was as if his touch shocked them both. She removed it from her cheek and before he could retract it, she removed his glove and replaced it back to where it was.
"If you need to touch me, Erik, it needs to be you. I do not want anything between us."
Before he could speak, he thought of what she said. There was an ocean between them. Secrets upon secrets that he held from the child in front of him. Rising and growling, he stood and turned his back to her. He could feel her stare burn into his back. She was as confused as he. Was it not only moments before that she had kissed the boy!
"I am surprised you are not with Monsieur de Wynter."
Angelina cringed at Jonathan's name. She should have known he was in the rafters watching her. Oh my God! He saw the kiss! She began to rise but she watched him hold up the exposed hand.
"Do not rise for my sake. I know what lies in your heart."
"Far from it, Erik. I do not even know what lies within my heart."
"I know her."
The statement puzzled her. He moved from one subject to another. "You know who?"
"I know Christine Daae. Better known to you as Christine de Chagny."
His head slowly turned and he watched Angelina turn deathly white. The silence in the room was deafening as Angelina tried to stand. Her legs could not support her, the shock still not registering.
"You know…you know…"
Erik's arms quickly embraced her and helped her stand. Noticing his arms were around her, she pushed him away and stumbled backwards. She fell but stood once again, her mind not registering the pain.
"You know my mother?"
"Angelina, please do not walk away…"
Her legs were like stone. She could not move. He was drawing closer and all she wanted to do was run. He knows my mother. He knows Christine.
"Do not come any closer!"
"Please, Angelina…"
He held out his hand. The hand was naked and bare just like his heart. He had hurt her beyond anything he had ever wanted to. There was more but tonight, Erik would not reveal that 'the phantom' that haunted her mother was him.
"You know my mother and did not tell me?"
"I did not want to burden you with that."
"I think it was my right to know."
"It was."
She fell but this time, when Erik caught her, Angelina did not push him away. The pain would not slowly go away. But there was more to say and if he did not get it out, he never would.
"How long did you know her?"
"I only saw her a few times." Lies! You lie to her and then expect her to love you! "I watched her in the wings while she performed. Much like I do you."
Angelina looked at Erik with tears in her eyes. She had to ask the one question that she knew she shouldn't. "Were you her teacher?"
Do not lie to her, Erik. If you do, it will be your downfall.
"No." His throat swelled until he could speak no more. Her gaze destroyed every barrier that he had put up for himself. To be with her he would lie. He would lie about his past to save his future. "I did not teach your mother."
Her head nodded as she rose from his grasp. The legs that helped her stand were sturdier now. Angelina had regained her composure and her strength. Although the pain still lingered, the honesty of Erik helped her.
"Your mother was a star on her own." And yet you continue to lie. "She was beautiful and magnificent. And much like…"
He stopped as her gaze lowered. The thought of being compared to her mother hurt Angelina more then anyone could fathom. It was not the fact that she did not love her mother. That could not be further from the truth. It was the fact that she was not seen for her own talents but the talents that were her mother's. All Angelina asked for was a mark on society and she had still not received it.
"Do not compare me to my mother, Erik. That is all I ask of you."
Their gazes met once again. His naked hand brushed away the tear that escaped from the side of her eye. He stood watching her. There was no pain on her face. There was no emotion. Did she hate Christine that much? Did she hate her to the point of not wanting to be compared to her?
"I am my own person. I love my mother, Erik. I do. But I cannot be Christine. I will never be Christine de Chagny or Christine Daae. She is in my blood but I am nothing like her."
All I want is my own light. I just want to be Angelina and not my mother's shadow.
The more Erik thought about it, the more he believed she was right. Christine was a child when he met her, much like Angelina. But Angelina had grown into her own. She was no longer a child in Erik's eyes but a young woman who still had many facets to be explored.
Her voice still had yet to be perfected but her dancing was unlike any other. She could dance with passion and sensuality or she could dance with anger and fury. Her feet and her hands held her true talent. Her voice would come later.
The woman who stood before him was not Christine but Angelina de Chagny. She was the woman who held the key to everything that was his: his soul and his heart. The feelings for Christine still lingered in his heart but were being overpowered by the feelings for Angelina.
"Please, Erik, tell me you do not see me as Christine. Please be the only one in Paris who does not see me as my mother."
Her eyes pleaded with his. Without thought, as if guided by instinct, his head shook. "No, Angelina. I do not see Christine standing before me."
Her smile lit up the room. Her soul was set free. For the first time, someone did not see her as Christine de Chagny – the famed opera singer. Someone saw her as Angelina de Chagny – the up and coming opera singer.
"I see my student. I see you, Angelina. No one else."
She ran to him and into his arms. His arms wrapped around her and held her close. The scent that covered her entered into his memory. Warm vanilla. Cinnamon. He smiled. Angelina was in his arms and not running from him.
You lied to her. It will haunt you.
Erik did not care what the voice inside of him screamed. Yes, he had lied to her. But to protect her and him, he would do it again. The events earlier in the night erased themselves from his memory. The boy had nothing on him – at least that is what he told himself. Angelina did not reciprocate Jonathan's affections as she did with Erik. The thought of it brought a smile to his lips.
She pulled back from him and smiled. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For believing in me. For actually seeing me. No one had ever said that to me before. Everyone usually tells me that they cannot see me and only my mother."
"You are basked in your own light – as you deserve to be."
Her smile grew wider. But the thought remained. You are lying to him, Angelina. You are lying to yourself. Could she ever truly be honest with Erik? Could she ever be honest with herself?
"Enough talk of the past. There are many lessons still to be taught."
Angelina watched Erik sit down at the organ and begin playing a piece she barely recalled. She sighed and pushed her thoughts away. Best kept for another day. The love she held in her heart would be kept at bay until she thought the time was right to try and understand it. Would Erik ever look at her the way she wanted him to? Would he ever look at her the same way her father did with her mother?
Erik could feel her thinking. What is she pondering? He slowly turned his head and looked at her – his hands continuing to play the piece. My God, she is beautiful. Angelina could never be Christine in his eyes – not any longer. The angel of music that he once had was grown and happy in life.
There was a new angel of music – powerful and passionate. Angelina could be sensual and everything he never expected. Erik would bring the true Angelina to the surface. She deserved to be in the light and she would be. However, if she deserved to be with him remained to be seen.
"Are you going to stand there all day or will we accomplish something?"
Instinct guided her to the organ and Erik's side. A new day was dawning. But little white lies haunted them both. One refused to tell the truth about their past while the other refused to tell secrets of their past. Would it separate them and hurt them more then they could imagine? Neither knew or cared. In the present time, they were both happy. What would happen in the future would remain there. For now, the music would fill them both and would lead them on a journey neither one would forget.