A/N: You will have to forgive me. I write this note on the eve of my brother's funeral. I want to thank you all for your kind comments. Phoenix consoled me while I told my story. The loss of Alexander will be carried heavy on my heart.

This next chapter was hard to write for Phoenix as well. Much emotion was poured into this chapter. Please read and review. She would love to hear how well she handled this chapter. I would also like to mention that she has also written a story called 'The Lonely Road We Have Taken' on FictionPress dot com. If you wish to have the link, include it in your review. She would love to have a few readers on that story. No one has reviewed and her muses are missing them.

On a brighter note…Soon Phoenix will also begin to post her new Phantomstory. As soon as Light is finished, a new Erik will emerge. Please continue to read her work. She would appreciate it.

Once again, there is a song within this chapter that does not belong to Erik or Phoenix. We would like to thank Monsieur Josh Groban. Without him, the song would not be possible. In light of all that has happened, the stage continues to be yours.

With much love,

Angelina

Chapter 45 – To the Heart of the Matter

Erik pondered climbing the winding staircase. He did not care if anyone in the opera house saw him. Scream after scream he had listened to echoed in his lair. Angelina was in pain and he did not know why. His heart broke as the first shrill scream pierced his soul.

His legs were growing tired and begged him to take a rest. But he would not relent. His pace was growing more furious with each passing minute.

Damn my face!

It was his face that denied him to seek out Angelina and find out what was wrong. It was his damn face that would condemn him to wait in solitude as others consoled his angel.

Another scream erupted throughout the lair. His scream joined hers. Hers was in pain – his in frustration.

Finally finding the courage, he began toward the stairs but stopped once he heard the sound of the mirror shutting closed. Seconds turned into minutes as he patiently waited for whoever was coming down the stone staircase.

Sobs replaced the screams he heard earlier. The sound of footsteps stopped abruptly. Erik leapt and bounded up the remaining stairs to see Angelina sitting on a step shrouded in darkness. The torches lit every one except the one she sat upon.

"Angelina…"

She looked up at him, her cheeks pale and stained by tears. Her hair hung about her shoulders with no life. She shivered – cold and tired.

"Let me take you…"

Angelina quickly pulled away from him, causing Erik to jump. "Do not touch me."

A crumpled note was in her left hand. Erik noticed the seal right away.

The de Chagny seal…

"Is everything alright at home?"

Angelina put the note farther from view. The news was still to raw to tell anyone. Her heart was slowly beginning to accept what the note said.

"Angelina, tell me what has happened."

"He is dead." The note ripped in her hand. Her fingers tore it apart. "He is dead!"

Erik cringed as her voice made the water ripple. She shook – not from the cold but from anger.

"Who?"

"The man I have loved since birth…my best friend…my confidant…my brother…"

Erik's eyes widened as realization hit.

"…Alexander is dead…" Angelina began to rock back and forth. The cold air from the lair did not chill her as much as hearing her say that her brother died out loud. "…he is dead."

Taking a chance, Erik sat beside her in the darkness that very rarely called to anyone else but him. Today, it denied him entry and granted the soul that deserved to be basked in light.

"Tell me it is not true, Erik."

"I cannot."

"Tell me it is not true!"

Angelina's fists met rock. She continued to pound until Erik quickly stopped her. Turning her toward him, her fists began their assault on his chest. He let her wrists go and let her beat him.

"Make him come back!" Tears joined with her pounding. "Bring him back!"

"I cannot…"

"Please…." Her hands grew tired and she could see the blood stains on Erik's shirt. Angelina's hands slid down his chest. "…please…"

Erik put his arms around her and listened to her cry. He had never known family. By the time he was old enough to remember, his mother had already given him to the carnival. There was no way of knowing whether he had any brothers or sisters. The emotions Angelina were feeling were foreign to him. There was no way he could console her to the point of making her feel no more anguish.

Angelina clung to him as a child would their mother if they were in pain. Her mother and father were clinging to each other – of this she knew. Her mother's melancholy state was taking a toll not only on her mother but on her father as well. She longed to have her father by her side but there was no way he could come.

"Where are your parents?"

"My mother is too sick to leave home. My father could not leave her side."

Erik closed his eyes and said a silent prayer for Christine. In his heart he still loved her but now in a different way than years prior. He still cared for her. Erik would have done anything to make sure no pain ever entered her heart. He failed both mother and daughter.

"I love him, Erik. He was my best friend."

"You were close?"

"My father always said we were closer than any other brother and sister he had ever seen. We did everything together."

"Then remember those times…" Taking a single finger, he lifted Angelina's chin to have her eyes meet his. "…he would not want you to mourn him as you are."

"You cannot begin to imagine…" She stopped. Erik had been through his own torment. He did not need to suffer the loss of a loved one. "…I am sorry. I do not want my words to hurt you."

"I know you do not mean them. You are angry and in pain. I will not take them into my heart as I have done many of your other words."

He watched as a smile crept onto her face. Erik smiled and kissed her forehead. The pain would lessen over time. He would see to it. Until then, Angelina's heart would be open and bleeding. Time would heal all that was lost. She would, in time, understand that Alexander was always with her as he was.

"He just…Erik, he was the first person I ever said 'I love you' to. I mean that…our bond was a brother and sister bond that exceeded the expectations of everyone. We were the children of Christine and Raoul de Chagny. We were expected to behave as upper class children – respect for others and to keep a hold of the reputation of the family."

Erik watched as Angelina hung her head. She moved against the cold stone wall, hoping that the frigid temperature would calm her nerves.

"My father thought that Alexander would be the problem child. I turned out to be the demon child." She laughed. "Alexander did all he could to keep me out of trouble. There was an instance, where I stood near a pond. Jonathan stood in front of me, looking at the fish swimming about. I shoved Jonathan into the pond…"

Erik wanted to smile at the thought of the boy drowning in the pond. It would have saved him a lot of trouble of trying to win the affections of Angelina.

"…I did not know the water was freezing. Jonathan's father was of noble blood and did not like me in the least. Once he found out about Jonathan, he quickly blamed me. Alexander took the blame." Smiling, Angelina looked at Erik. "It was the first time I ever said 'I love you'. He saved me from a horrible punishment. It is a debt that I can never repay…"

Her hands quickly covered her face. Tears flowed once again. Erik could take no more. Standing, he looked down upon her.

"Come…"

Angelina looked into her angel's eyes. They showed no emotion but his hand, outstretched, showed that he cared.

"You need sleep. Dreams need to take you far away from everything."

"Erik, I will not be able to sleep."

"You will. This I promise you."

She grasped his hand as he pulled her to her feet. Sweeping her off of her feet, Erik gathered her tired frame in his arms and began down the stairs. The flames that lit the way seemed to flicker their sorrowful apologies for the loss of Alexander.

Her head was mocking her. It pounded as she did on Erik's chest. Resting her head on his chest, the constant stepping was making it grow.

"Erik…"

"I will get you something for your headache." He knew her head was throbbing. Her head rested against his chest and he watched her grimace in pain with every step he took. It was only a few steps farther and he could lay her in bed and dim the light that hurt her more than she needed.

Moving toward the bedroom, he climbed the last four stairs and placed her onto the satin sheets. She curled up into a ball and tried to hide from everything around her. Erik quickly dimmed the light, to help ease her suffering.

"I will be back in a moment's time."

She could hear Erik move from the room. Uncovering herself, Angelina looked around the room. Every time she had been in the room, she was unconscious and did not have a chance to see anything.

Nothing decorated the walls and only a dresser and closet occupied the room other than the bed. It was the top of his dresser that peaked her interest.

Her eyes searched the darkness and tried to see what was on it: several bottles, sheet music, quills, ink, and a small velvet box. Before Angelina could rise, Erik returned with a glass of water as he something mixed in it.

Erik sat beside Angelina and helped her sit up. Holding out the glass, he watched her shake her head. "Drink."

"What is in that?"

"Something to help your headache. Drink it all."

"I am not drinking that until I know what is in there."

Taking her hand, Erik put the glass into it. "You do not trust me yet?"

"I trust you, Erik, with my life."

"Then drink. I assure you, in several minutes time, your headache will ease."

He watched her drink until all of the water was gone. Taking back the glass, Erik set it down. Angelina lay back down and pulled the blankets over her head.

"You will suffocate that way."

"Maybe my heartache will go away."

Taking the sheet, he pulled it down to her shoulders. "Hiding in the darkness will not help you."

"Does it help you?"

Erik's eyes went wide at the question. Angelina grimaced after hearing herself say it.

"Erik, I am sorry…I did not…"

"No…it does not help."

Silence seemed to hang between them, wanting to suffocate them. Before Erik could stand, Angelina's fingers slowly began to caress the back of his hand.

"Sing to me."

"You need to sleep."

"Then sing me to sleep, as you did the boy we saved."

"You saved him, Angelina."

"You gave him a home and a life. I did nothing."

Sighing, Erik put both of her hands over her stomach. He left one hand to rest over both. "And what would you have me sing?"

"You are the great composer. You choose."

Searching his memory, he nodded. The notes he needed were in his mind. He did not need the organ to help him sing this one.

"Remember…I will still be here…as long as you hold me…in your memory."

His fingers mimicked what Angelina's did to his hand only moments before.

"Remember…when your dreams have ended…time can be transcended…just remember me…"

It was as if a cloud was lifted. Her head began to feel lighter. The storm was finally passing. Angelina's eyes slowly began to droop.

"I am the one star that keeps burning…so brightly…it is the last light…to fade into the rising sun."

Erik watched his angel drift into the dreams she needed to have. Reality did not need to hold her any longer.

"I'm with you…whenever you tell my story…for I am all I've done."

His hand gently moved from her hands to her face. He slowly began to caress the tear stained cheeks as Angelina fell deeper into sleep.

"Remember…I will still be here…as long as you hold me in your memory…Remember me."

Tears fell without reservation. Erik brushed them away without pretense. There would be more tears shed and his hand would brush every one of them away.

"I am the one voice in the cold wind that whispers…and if you'll listen you'll hear me call across the sky."

Her chest rose and fell. With each breath, a tear was shed.

"As long as I can still reach out…and touch you…then I will never die."

Angelina's hand found Erik's and entwined her fingers with his. He took a deep breath and continued on with his song.

"Remember…I'll never leave you…if you will only…remember me..." Taking a brief pause, Erik knew that Angelina was so far into her dreams that he could reach her no longer. "…remember me."

He rose from the bed and looked at his fallen angel. There was much still to be done. If he knew Angelina as he did, the anger of the death of her brother was far from over. There was much more that needed to be said and done. He hoped that it would not take an event of catastrophic proportions to be rid of her melancholy. Erik knew that in order to make herself feel better, Angelina would hurt herself to feel as though she were feeling the pain they felt. Erik would not let that happen. This time, he would be there for her unlike her fall from grace several months prior.

Kissing her forehead, he began his travel from the lair. Erik knew that Angelina would need her things. She would not want to return to her room. Gathering the strength he needed, Erik began his ascent up the staircase. Happiness was what Angelina needed. He would expose himself to get it for her.

Angelina's room had grown dark. A chair had been toppled over and parchment littered the floor.

Erik looked at the mess and knew that Angelina had caused it. Her tirade had been great and no one had bothered to clean up the mess.

Insolent fools…

Bending down, he began to pick up the parchment but quickly stopped. There was one sheet that was not blank like many of the others. Gathering the other pieces, he set them on the table.

Grabbing the chair, Erik sat down at the table and lit the reading lamp.

You should not read this…it is not your property…

His prying eyes did not stop even at the begging of his mind. He quickly began to read over the words…

Alexander,

I hope that you are well and that this reaches you in due speed. I have been meaning to talk to you of an urgent matter. I have already told father. He understood and supported me in my decision as I hope you will do.

I do not love Jonathan.

I have not loved him for some time. If you have been wondering why I have not accepted his proposal, this is part of the reason.

The other reason is: I have fallen in love. Oh, Alexander, if you could only know how happy I am. You might possibly hear it in my words. But I smile every time I am around him. I could soar to the heavens and no one would ever find me.

He has made me the happiest girl on Earth. Of course I have not told him that I love him. How can I? It would be improper. Mother and father would never hear of it. But father knows how I feel.

Who is he, you ask? I am smiling because I know once I utter his name, my fate will be sealed. Alexander, you must swear to me you will tell no one will know of this. Father knows I am in love but he does not know with whom. Only you and I will ever know. Swear it?

He has been a part of my life for months now. He has seen me through bad times and worse times. He has been my teacher, my guardian, my angel…

Alexander, his name is Erik. I could sing his voice from the rooftops and it would never be enough. I love him more than words could express.

Write to me, come to Paris. I must see you.

With all my love,

Angelina

Erik's breath caught and his heart nearly stopped.

She loves me…

He stood – knocking over the chair. Erik had never been flustered before. It was as if his entire world was spinning. Looking at the letter once again, Erik assured himself that he had not imagined what he read.

It was a private letter – one that was not to be read by your eyes.

It did not matter to Erik. He would never reveal to Angelina that he had read her letter. Placing it with the rest of the parchment, Erik quickly gathered several dresses and some of her other belongings and placed them into a satchel. Closing it, he glanced one more time at the letter.

She loves me!

The reflection he saw bore the hint of a smile. Pressing his hand to the mirror, his smile grew just thinking of what the letter contained. His heart could have wept with happiness.

It is not Rene. She loves me!

Erik vowed to himself that things would change: subtly but with haste. He could not come out and confess to Angelina his feelings. Erik needed to show her. By taking care of her, it was a step closer to her. He would guide her and protect her. His angel would shine and he would be the reason.

Sliding open the mirror, the hallway seemed to glow brighter. Erik stepped through, closing it behind him. Starting down the hallway, Erik walked with purpose. He loved Angelina. Angelina loved him. He had a reason to live – a reason to be who he always wanted to be. Erik smiled.

I am a Man. I am a Man in love and who is going to be loved in return.