Chapter Three

Liberty, Sick-bay/pilots lounge

When Kara Kar'Esta was released off sick-bay her world wasn't entirely the same any more. The first thing she saw – she was even still half in the infirmary – was Marcus Lochlin, one of her fellow Grays rushed into the intensive care unit and medics buzzing and hovering all around him. Then, only minutes later, a nearly catatonic woman wearing Rebel Alliance standard pilot uniform with the rank insignia of a Captain was brought in with Tyan D'ar, her squadron's medic, quietly talking to her.

Totally confused she asked the first Gray she met if he knew anything about what was happening. Randy Krennel, the youngest male member of the squadron, seemed to be as confused as she was but he tried to tell her all he knew. "He kept repeating "Something big just happened, something really big.", and then suddenly he ran off to the Captain's quarters and the next thing I hear is Kenzy practically shouting over the comm to get Tie there and something about Alderaan I didn't quite understand." The Devaronian sat down slowly on the chair standing next to her. "Alderaan…" She choked. "Alderaan's been destroyed." Krennel looked down at her. "Now you're kidding, Kay."

"No, Randy… no kidding in this." He sat down, too. "The Captain said she was from Alderaan…" She narrowed her eyes. "Captain? A woman, long red-golden hair, my height?" He nodded. "So that's why she looked so strange…" she muttered, more to herself than Randy. "What?" She cleared her throat. "She was brought in the infirmary just after Marcus. Completely catatonic. Tie kept fussing over her, while Marcus… Randy, do you know what happened? Just anything?" He just shook his head. At the same moment the massive shadow of Pat Flann fell on them and the booth they occupied in the cantina. "She shot him, that's what happened." Randy and Kara both snapped her heads up, startled. "Don't pull that drill-sergeant voice on us again, Flann.", Kara muttered irritated. Randy just kept starring. "Shot him? That's impossible, why should she shoot at a fellow officer?"

"Completely off the roll, I'd say." That was Blenwell's voice. He pulled a chair and sat down, too. "Is this going to be one of these "incidentally" meetings of Gray Squadron?" Kara asked, still confused and got her answer from Lieutenant Kenzy as she approached the group. "No, I called for it. You were the only one getting here by incident. But now that you're here… it's good to have you back."

After some more minutes the rest of the squadron, consisting of Banon, Deraani and Nunb, had joined them. Kenzy cleared her throat and immediately everyone was looking at her. Well, everyone save Blenwell but she almost had waited for that. Any moment there would be the obligatory remark. She was counting down in her head. One, two, three… "I don't know 'bout you, guys, but I got something more important to do than listen to that wanna-be commander here." Inwardly she sighed. "May I inform you that now that I'm the highest-ranking officer in this squadron I have the full responsibilities of you, Flight Officer Blenwell?", she asked matter-of-factly and just prayed that he didn't answer and start another banter game. And she wished she wouldn't let him provoke her so often. "You may. But would you just get started now? I gotta get my sleep time. No… wait… I'm going to get enough sleep nonetheless…" As ever so often Flann fell into chuckling with Blenwell and Saron just tried to ignore them. "Okay, I'm gonna make this short." Blenwell and Flann made a show of sighing happily. "With two pilots injured in sick bay, one serving as a medic and one in Imperial "care", we are the squadron with the lowest number of pilots. I'm going to file a request for replacements, three temporary and one steady, but I don't think this will help any. Luckily we are still at an even number but we need a re-arrangement of our wing-pairings nonetheless."

She tossed a few data cards in the round. "You can see them on this cards. There are also the re-arrangements of our day-duty and training schedule, warrant as long as we remain like we are now. I've spoken to Tie 10 minutes or so ago and he told me that because of the bacta shortage we're on in the moment the healing of Marcus will take at least one week. Unfortunately he couldn't say anything about Captain Mallan. I fear that she has to face an inquiry as soon as she is able to speak again. I don't know about you but I think we won't see her again. That's it, more or less. Any questions?"

For some seconds they only starred at her. Nobody of them had seen her in her full commando mode before and they were stunned. Now they could image why she got promoted to brevet Lieutenant shortly after joining Starfighter Command. But after the first shock subsided they began to babble all at once.

"When do you think will we get the replacements?"

"What's this news about Alderaan?"

"I heard of some super-weapon…"

"Are we going to do anything about Devlin?"

"Will we get a new commander?"

She held up a hand and barked out a short "Can it!" and everybody was quite again. "Now, people, everyone will get his or her question answered but in line, 'kay? First is Randy." She looked at the young pilot seated to the right of her. "Kara said that Alderaan was destroyed. Do we have any confirmation about this?" She nodded sadly. "Unfortunately, yes. And to answer your question, Deraani, rumor has it indeed that it was a new Imperial super weapon. I used some contacts to Intel who told me that they have a 95 probability that this rumor can be confirmed. And they are normally quite thorough."

Saron nodded to Banon, giving him the opportunity to ask. "Do you think we will get a new commander at any time?" She knew Banon just asked this question out of habit, still not used to the idea of a permanent female commander like most of the male rebel pilots, but nevertheless she felt annoyed by the question. "If you haven't noticed I am a commissioned officer and therefore fit to command this squadron as long as Starfighter Command wants me to do it. But I think that when Marcus is fit to fly again he will take over the squadron." Kenzy didn't have to tell them that this would be mainly because Mallan wrote quite a heck of a recommendation in the communiqué she had wanted Marcus to read out to the squadron. It wouldn't be good neither for her nor Marcus. She clasped her hands. "Well, anything more?" They shook their heads. "Good. Dismissed." At this she turned and made her way back to her quarters.

ISD Predator, interrogation room

"Now, what do we have here?" Kesra Devlin opened her right eye. The left was too swollen to even attempt that. What she saw made her almost vomit. Before her stood in his perfectly spotless Imperial Navy uniform Admiral Arvin Chesfer. There were two things Devlin connected with this uniform. Unbearable pain and humiliation. In the few hours she had been in her prison they had stripped her off her flight suit, only leaving her in her underwear, had taken away her dog tags and had tortured her until she didn't feel anything except pain. And now some bald, cunningly grinning, self-righteous Imperial admiral was standing before her.

She was way to exhausted to speak anymore and so he got his question answered by the filtered voice of one of her stormtrooper guards. "Prisoner 1473. Rodian. Female. Intelligence identified it as "Flight Officer Kesra Devlin" by its identification number." The admiral nodded and looked down on her. Only now she realized that she most be lying on a bunk in cell. From the grin that spread over his face now she wished hard she would have died under the first torture session. "Female, you say? And a pilot… This could be interesting. Take her to the Predator into my special cell tract. Hopefully she is as strong as the rumors say about the Rebels' women pilots. I need a new toy. The last one broke down pretty fast."

With that she was hauled up by the stormtroopers. And her wish to be dead only grew worse.

Nebulon-B-Frigate Liberty, Lt. Kenzy's quarters

Are we going to do anything about Devlin? Nunb's synthetical computer voice still sounded in her head. Saron really wished she could have said yes but quite frankly she hadn't decided anything on this yet. She had read Mallan's communiqué where she also stated that she had sent in a request to Intelligence for information about the Hunter and that she had been working on the first planning stage on rescuing the lost squadron member as soon as there was any word on her and the Hunter's whereabouts.

When reading this Saron had grown quite embarrassed. She had accused the other woman of not caring about her subordinates out of anger about having to let Devlin down but she had been totally wrong. It had been Mallan's first objective to bring back Devlin if there was only the hint of hope. Although she knew that Intelligence had a hard time fulfilling all the requests from all over the Alliance military and civil administration she logged on HoloNet, punched in the password Mallan had given in her communiqué and waited for the surface to come up. She couldn't grasp her luck as she saw a little icon blinking in the upper left corner of the screen. She clicked on it at eventually got a text-mail with an attachment from Intel. She opened the attachment and began to read.

Information available on Hunter: Lancer-class frigate, part of the IV. Imperial Battle Group. Commanded by Captain Desra Tellik. Several encounters with Alliance battle groups, ground bases and solo operating ground and space units reported. Latest one was Nebulon-B-frigate Liberty. At the moment operating mostly in the area of the Outer Rim, mostly Alzoc III.

Not much, she thought. There was something else, something quite odd. A statistic about captured Alliance personnel in the Outer Rim, lined after occupation, rank, coordinates, date, name, ID-number, race and sex. Shrugging she scrolled down.

After an hour of evaluation she had found out that in the past two months there had been 40 captures, 28 of them female, mixed races, mostly pilots and ground soldiers and all of them in the operating area of the IV. Imperial Battle Group. Now if that isn't a weird co-incidence. She did a random check on the missing personnel and found out that the ones captured from two months to one month ago were mainly confirmed or presumed dead and that all the remaining 9 were missing in action with no cue about their fate. Saron didn't know how long she had starred at the words Pilot, Flight Officer, 149.8/387.65, 7-5-5648, Devlin, Kesra, 150528-D-59527, Rodian, female when she suddenly was brought out of her reverie by a beeping comm. "Kenzy here, what is it?"

"Tie here. I think you should come to sick bay as fast as possible."

Predator, brig

This time Kesra awoke painfully slow, as if she had to swim through flowing mud to reach the surface. Drugs., she thought weakly. There must have been drugs… She moaned. "Welcome to hell.", a female sounding bored voice said. Kesra pulled all her strength together and opened her eyes. Both of them, she noticed surprised. As quick as she could she did a survey of the room. Dim light, no windows, 10 bunks arrayed in a circle… She counted six huddled figures on the ground and the bunks and one woman sitting on another bunk with her left leg dangling down. "Who…?"

"Flight Officer Telsij Cayr, ID 031123-C-56834, Blue Squadron, at your service. And who are you?" Confused by the other woman's boldness Kesra also stated her rank, name, ID and squadron and then looked at the other… beings. "And…"

"Next to me on the right, Private Ryana Whares, some commando group I never remember. Got captured on some force-forsaken backwater planet. Then, beside her, on the floor, Lieutenant Maresh R'siikhi, control officer aboard a recently destroyed Corellian Corvette. Then we got MT1 Kat Deira, mechanic aboard some captured frigate." Dropping her voice to an affected sounding whisper Cayr went on: "Claims to be one of Red Flight's mechanics but if you ask me she's just braggin'." Recovering her original somewhat bored voice she continued: "The one to your right is Councilor H'sishi Istr, member of the Rebel Alliance Administration Corps. The next lady is Lieutenant Ganna Dsa'Osra, member of the Rebel Alliance Corps of Engineers. And last but not least this one left to me here is Lance Corporal Mijiyo Anasu, thinks to be the only survivor of her commando platoon which was ambushed more or less two and a half months ago. She is the one with the most time here. Well, and then you got me again." Kesra swapped her gaze around the room. The figures sitting there hadn't move a bit at the mention of their names. It seemed as if they were dead. She looked again at Cayr. "Are… are they… dead?"

"No. And yes. Don't ask me to explain it because you will experience it yourself when your times comes." The tone of her voice, this time sounding real, was dead serious and made Kesra shudder. When my time comes…

Liberty, sick-bay

Exhausted. She felt so exhausted. Coreena rolled around in her bed and starred at the white wall. What the heck had she done to get herself so drained out? She couldn't remember anything but she had the nagging feeling that something from her memory had gotten lost. She could almost see the white patch replacing some event she desperately needed to remember but at the same time she had the strange desire not to remember it. Heaving another sigh she rolled over again. Two hours feeling completely down and still not being able to sleep had taken their toll on her. Frustrated she got up and slowly walked over to the large window. They were in deep space and only few stars could be seen but that didn't diminish the feelings she had every time she had the muse to just look at the stars and let her thoughts wander.

She didn't know how long she had been standing there, watching at the stars with an occasional stray star fighter flying by, when the door behind her opened. "Captain Mallan, I suppose?" Slowly she turned around to see two men in the uniforms of Rebel Alliance Intelligence Service. "Yes. And you are…"

"Captain Reed from Intelligence, and this is my partner, Lieutenant Mitchum. We'd like to ask you a few questions about the incident happening some hours ago." Incident? "What… incident?" The men looked at each other frowning and then turned to her again. "So… you don't remember anything?" There was something in the manner of the man she didn't like the least. The feeling she got only told her she had been right about the white patch theory. "No… I… can remember attending the emergency conference about Alderaan being destroyed and then instructions General Dodonna gave us… but I get the suspicion you're not talking about this, are you?" They looked at each other again, with the same odd expression in their faces from before. "Did I get this right? You don't remember shooting your XO?"

This question hit her like a full force blast into the stomach and made her physically sick in an instant. She staggered back to her bed and slumped down on it, looking at the two Intelligence agents with a mixture of confusion, hurt, pain and fear in her eyes. "I did what?" In the same moment the door opened again and Tyan D'Ar came running in together with Lieutenant Kenzy. Without taking any notice of the two Intelligence men the Bith doctor came directly towards Coreena and gripped her by her shoulders. "Did they ask you anything about what happened before you came here?" After recognizing the look of her face a few seconds later he didn't need any answer from her. He turned to the Intel officers. "You told her, didn't you?" The desire to run and hide grew bigger and bigger insider her. With a quick glance Kenzy realized that it was only a question of time until Mallan began to cry so she rushed at her side, signaling to D'Ar to get the two other officers out of the room or at least distract them. Reluctantly he left Mallan's side and moved to the Intel men.

While he was cursing on them, condemning their actions, explaining to them that she was still in shock and that the revelation of the facts that caused the temporary amnesia would severely affect her healing process – and what was most important – ushering them slowly out of the room, Kenzy sat down beside Mallan and tried to console her. When the men finally had left the room and she was only with the Captain she began to speak to her while silently the tears began to flow down. "Look, Captain… I'm not very good at these soft things… you know, make others stop crying and so on… but I'm sorry you had to learn it the hard way… and I'm even more sorry that they told you the truth." A strangled sob was the only answer from the Captain. "At least you're lucky you didn't start crying when they were still in the room. It's never good for a female soldier to let someone see her cry. Men don't understand it. And… well… if I'm honest… I get irritated by that a bit myself, too… anyway… you wanna talk?"

For the first time she had been talking to her Captain the woman lifted her face and nodded. When she opened her mouth her voice came out in a hoarse whisper, interrupted by choked sobs. "Did I really…" Kenzy nodded. "I already told you and unfortunately it's still true." Mallan looked at her hands and Kenzy had the sneaking suspicion that she was looking for blood traces. "But… why?" As hard boiled as the Lieutenant was, this was surely racking her nerves, too. "Again I'm sorry to tell you this… but you are the only person who could tell. Well, maybe apart from Lochlin, that is, but he's still in coma so…" The Captain narrowed her eyes. But at least her voice was coming back to its normal volume. "Coma? Did I shoot him this bad…?" Kenzy could see the desperation building up inside her and was truly relieved that she could tell the other woman news that were at least partially good for her.

"No, but we're on a bacta shortage. There are almost none of our bacta reserves left so we have to rely on synth-flesh and ryll." Mallan took her face down again. Then, the hoarse whisper was back again. "Can I… see him?" This question took her off-guard. "I'm not sure… Tie didn't say anything about that…" Two strange eyes gazing intensively at her had quite an interesting affect. "But… maybe…" These eyes were still starring at her. Surprised she realized that the right eye was in a piercing ice-cold blue while the left had the color of emerald green. She sighed. "Yes. But we have to be careful not to rise any suspicions. Act normal while we cross the corridor, okay?" The Captain nodded and got up. She straightened her hospital robe and gave the Lieutenant an expectant look. "Well?" A bit confused Kenzy got up, too. Without another word they left the room.

When they were on their way to intensive care Coreena tried to be as matter-of-factly as she could according the circumstances. She cleared her throat and tried to sound relaxed when she asked: "So… what's with the squadron? I assume you took over the command?" Hesitating Kenzy nodded. "Yes. I organized wing-pairing changes and gave them the new day-routine and training schedule. I hope you don't mind that I requested replacements not only for Devlin and Lochlin bud also for you." Mallan shook her head. "No, it was the right decision. I don't think they will let me back to active service for quite a while when they sent some guys from Intelligence this early. So… who's your XO?" Again she was taken off-guard. She had taken everything in her mind apart from assigning a new XO. "Well… I…"

"It would be Flight Officer Blenwell because of his length of service, am I right?" The Captain eyed her interested and Kenzy had quite a hard time trying to hide her scorn from her. So she has noticed the particular animosity between us. "Yes, ma'am." Coreena sensed the uneasiness in the Lieutenant and decided to change the topic. "So… did you read my report?" Kenzy nodded. "And… have you decided anything on the thing with Devlin?"

"Well… I… read the data Intelligence had provided us with and came to a very strange conclusion." This conversation was taking an interesting turn for Coreena. Ever since she had been brought into sick bay she detected real interest for what was happening outside. She found it almost a pity that they had reached intensive care. Without a word Kenzy led her to Lieutenant Lochlin's bed and Coreena suddenly felt the urge to be completely alone with him. She turned to Kenzy. "Would you mind… leaving me… us… alone for some time?" After considering her options for just a moment she nodded and turned to leave but Mallan called her back. "I want you to write me a complete report about your data analysis until tomorrow. And brief the squadron on it, too. Oh, and coordinate your actions with flight officer Blenwell." To her surprise Kenzy tossed her a salute and answered with a stout "Yes, ma'am.", then spun on her heel and left.

Frowning and a little uneasy, Coreena got herself a chair and sat down beside Lochlin's bed. Feeling a little awkward she began to talk in a low voice so that only he could hear it. If he could hear, would be the correct phrase., she thought in a just slightly bitter tone.

"So… I hope you don't have to feel too much pain wherever you are. I… just want to say that I can't express how sorry I am about hurting you. Can you image that I don't even know why I did this? I can't even remember you coming to my quarters or speaking to me or anything from some hours ago. I feel so horrible… I can feel that the memory of why and when I did this is still lying somewhere in the back of my mind but I just don't have access to them." She looked at the silent face of her XO. He was unusual pale and under his eyes dark circles had formed. For quite a time she just sat there, starring at the man lying before her and silently pondering how this could have happened. And with every minute her inability to grasp the memories that seemed to slip out of her hands every time she was so close to them she could almost see the images before her again unnerved her more. Just to calm herself down she began her monologue again.

"You see… I still can't remember why I did this but I'm absolutely sure I didn't do this on purpose. I'd never hurt a fellow officer. Force… I wish you'd just wake up, don't suffer from amnesia and tell everybody how this happened." Without thinking she reached out and ran her hand over his face with a butterfly light touch. "I am so sorry. You did nothing to me… well, apart from not being able to fill out a simple report, that is… Oh, look at me, I'm scolding you even if you can't hear me." Time seemed to be insignificant as she sat there, talking to a man she barely knew, spilling out her secrets and ever so often begging him to forgive her. Every once in while a nurse or a doctor would come by but they didn't dare to disturb her as she seemed to be so worried about the patient. And after two hours she finally fell asleep with her head beside his arm.