Mourning
Summary: Harry comes to pay his last respects. Oneshot. Book 6 SPOILER WARNING!
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or anything related to the books.
It is a cool windy day. The sky is dark but that is fine. It only seems appropriate that today will be dismal. It's as if Mother Nature herself is paying her respects to such a great wizard.
I walk quietly behind Mr. Weasley. Ron and Hermione are both behind me. I know that we are supposed to go after the horcruxes but I just couldn't bring myself to leave without visiting him one last time. Mr. Weasley goes first. He stands next to the tomb and says a few words. He looks drawn-out and tired. Without Dumbledore a lot of people have been losing hope. I push Ron and Hermione in front of me to go to the tomb. They each say a few kind words and regrets. Hermione places a large bundle of flowers at the foot of it, before they, too, step aside.
Slowly I walk towards the white tomb. It has many ridges and patterns carved into it that creates an image of dancing fire. I come to a halt. Unlike the others a slowly lower myself to the earth and kneel before my fallen headmaster. Gently I begin to trace the exquisite ridges as I talk.
"Your funeral was exactly what you would have wanted a huge gathering of all kinds of wizards. Most of whom I'm sure are great personal friends. The merpeople gave a tribute. Their song was dreary yet a calm enlightening song that was perfectly befitting of you. I was surprised that the centaurs came at all. Although, it shows that in spite of their anger towards wizards, they still respected you greatly to come to the ceremony and give their salute. It was a magnificent service. You are modest but between me and you, I KNOW that you would have been pleased with such an amazing send off. Admit it you old dog."
"You have been a constant in my life ever since I can remember. Yu were the one who took responsibility for sending me to the Dursleys. I don't hate you for that. I honestly don't. I now understand that it was the safest place for me. And still is. You were protecting me in the best way that you knew how. Don't worry I'll go back one more time this summer. Just like you asked. "
I lowered my head so that my cheek rested on the tomb. My fingers continued to play idly with the designs. I slowly traced a particularily large flame as I continued speaking.
"You have always been protecting me. In first year, you saved me after I went after Quirrell for the Philosopher's stone. I would have died had you not come bolting back to Hogwarts as fast as you could because "you felt as it was where you were needed most". Again in second year, it was your phoenix Fawkes that saved me from the Basilisk by blinding it so that I had a chance to fight. I survived that night and was able to save Ginny as well because of you. In third year you told Hermione and I how to go back in time and save both Sirius and Buckbeak, It's Witherwings now though. In fourth year you may not have been able to help me in the Graveyard but when Barty Crouch Jr. tried to kill me you and McGonnagall and Snape came bursting in and stunned him. Until that point I had never seen you so furious. I have to admit, I was scared of you then. I had realized how truly powerful you are. But you have always gotten angry when things hurt me now haven't you. Again in fifth, you saved me from Voldemort by dueling him. You have always helped me along my adventures. Giving me just enough information to complete the task and keep me from being killed."
"You have always protected me. Even at your own cost. You sacrificed yourself for me. You froze me in place instead of defending yourself against an attack. You made yourself more vulnerable than you had already become because of the potion you had drank. I don't blame myself for your death. I now realize that it is our choices, like you had said. You chose to save me from being killed and to voluntarily leave yourself vulnerable."
As I said this my actions turned into a slow caress of the tomb. He was such a strong influence in my life, ever since I could remember. He was part of my family.
"I haven't forgotten about "what we were doing" when we went away from Hogwarts. I will continue the quest. I promise you. I give you my word. I will find the horcruxes and I will kill Voldemort. Not because the Wizarding World expects their "Chosen One" to save them all. Not because the prophecy told me that I had to. But because I want him dead and I want to kill him myself."
"You were my role model, my protector- my mentor. You gave my guidance. I trusted you more than anyone else. You trusted me as much as I trusted you. When I was helping you swim through the icy water, you said that you were not worried because you were with me. You don't know how much that trust means to me. It hurts so much to know that you're gone..."
I turned my head and rested my forehead on the white tomb. It was frigid. It's such a contrast to Dumbledore's cheerful and bright demeanor. At that moment everything hit me as if I had been dosed in ice water. He's gone. He's not coming back. I sat there for what seemed like ages, kneeling with my face pressed again the tomb. A hand is on my shoulder and I barely register Mr. Weasley's voice telling me that it's time to leave. I slowly stand up and take one last view of the tomb. Wet and slightly darker where I was kneeling and I realize that I had been crying.
"Come along Harry" speaks Hermione gently. The sky is darker. Deep crimsons and golds cover the horizon. It is indeed time to go. So much time has been wasted and I need to begin to journey on my quest. The horcruxes are out there. With Ron and Hermione's help I will find them and they will be destroyed. I will then be able to kill Voldemort himself.
"I only wish that you could be here, if only to offer a lemon drop."