A/N: Hope you enjoy this chapter! It's not quite a Carby yet, but plans are on the horizon! However, I can tell you that its not going to be an easy ride. If you like the story please review…comments are always an encouragement, and thanks if you've already taken the time :)
Disclaimer: I own nothing! sniffs
Title: A Friend Indeed.
Chapter 3: Four Days
Purple light poured through the pale curtain fabric; the brightness of dawn hung on the horizon as it chased away the ominous darkness of the night. Now that the room basked in soft twilight, Abby found that she was able to breathe a sigh of relief.
She had loved the darkness and the night. It was when eerie quiet descended on the busy city; cool air swept through the streets and faded light cast curious shadows everywhere. Her affection for the night-time had established itself in her chaotic childhood. If Maggie failed to turn up at home before dusk fell, she would stay awake to watch over her little brother – occasion became habit and after a while she found that she enjoyed this time of day. It became a time of some tranquillity amongst the turbulence she experienced, caused by her mother's alternating episodes of mania and despair. The little girl, whose brown eyes expressed a worldliness that shouldn't have graced the face of a child, chose darkness as a time to escape her pain; a time where her thoughts, fears and her emotions were safe to express in the shadows and easier to hide from the world and herself. Time changed the features of the little girl to awoman but her habits remained, although now, the comfort of darkness was accompanied by dark intoxicating liquor.
Over the last year night-time was when she would pore over the immense medical texts, absorbing the knowledge that had helped her to achieve her dreams of becoming a doctor. Fear and pessimism was no longer a prominent feature of her life. However, she would, in the peace of the night reflect on how far she had come.
The dark hours now, only provide a reminder of her recent nightmare, night-time was no longer a time of calm quiet, reflection and emotion. Now it was only time of blackness, a whirlpool of blankness and terror.
She fought her way out of the tangle of soft cotton to sit up on her pillows. She blinked slowly as the red neon came into focus 5:17am. An hour since she last looked, another hour of sleep lost. She sighed tiredly and fell back towards her pillows, now daylight approached, she had relaxed, and her eyelids began to close, heavy with fatigue.
Neela stumbled sleepily around the small living area. Early mornings were just one of the blights in the life of an overworked intern. As she cleared up some of the mess she had made, removing the bed-linen from the sofa, making a neater pile of the skyscraper of dirty pots in the kitchen. A glance at the clock told her it was time to leave.
After groping in the dim light for her bag and keys, she moved slowly towards the front door, her efforts to avoid the squeaky floorboard were unsuccessful. Neela briefly paused outside the door of Abby's bedroom. Neela had only seen her room-mate twice in four days since her kidnapping ordeal. Abby had come home from the hospital pale and quiet, soon afterwards she had withdrawn to her room, and at least while Neela was home, had stayed there. They had bumped into each other only twice, Abby had seemed numb, only answering Neela's concerned questions with monosyllabic replies. Last night she had heard her moving around the apartment restlessly.
Worry had preoccupied her thoughts, she had to see if she was okay and she knocked at the bedroom door.
A loud knock shook her out of her sleepy state, heartbeat racing; she jolted upright stiffly into a sitting position. In each hand she grasped a bundle of bed sheets tightly. The swift movement caused her to wince as a dull ache still throbbed at her wrists.
Noise floated through the door, "Abby"
"Abby, are you alrig…." The voice faded and suddenly, blackness had engulfed her once more. A terrifyingly familiar odour invaded her senses; she recognised it as eau de car interior: musty leather mingled with the greasy stench of fast-food and the scent of ferrous blood. The smell sickened her stomach, just as it had done the first time. Quickly, the blackness faded and bright shaft of torchlight shined directly into her face, hurting her eyes, but as soon as it appeared it was gone. Now all she could see was the whites of his eyes, open, the dark irises encircled wide, gaping pupils. He was dead. She knew that there was no hope for her now and fear of retribution engulfed her soul.
The image caused shock and pain to bubble inside her, she opened her mouth to scream, but her throat closed tightly and instead, a sob escaped.
"Abby" The vision disappeared leaving fear settled inside her stomach, but the voice grasped her attention again.
"Abby, I'm coming in"
Abby managed to find her voice, "No" and the doorknob ceased to rattle.
"Abby"
"No its okay, I'm fine"
"You sure?"
"Yes"
"Okay" Neela said doubtfully through the closed door. "I'm just leaving for work, I'm on at six…I should get off at six…i'll be straight back. Call if you need me."
Abby's thoughts still raced as Neela's voice reverberated through the door again.
"Abby"
"Yes" The tumult of emotions and her tiredness suppressed the eye roll for her.
"I'll see you later"
Short an intern, Susan had been covering the night shifts herself. The niggling guilt that she had felt since the night that Abby was attacked had manifested itself in a determination to do everything she possibly could. Exhausted as these extra shifts made her feel, at least they ousted the feelings of helplessness and guilt that she felt. The only thing she regretted was missing Chuck and Cosmo, but at least tonight had been relatively quiet. She had managed to camp out her last hour at the admit desk, passing minor cases to Ray and Morris, filling in and signing off on charts.
Pratt entered the security doors, "Morning Dr Lewis!" He exclaimed casting his gaze over his superior "Man…you look beat"
Susan shot him a look, "Thanks Dr. Pratt for your innovative diagnosis"
He strutted towards the admit desk, rubbing his hands together excitedly, "No problem…any good traumas on the graveyard" he said cockily.
"Well, Dr. Pratt…" She began sweetly, before thrusting a pile of charts into his hand "Foreign body in exam one, rash in curtain three, and projectile vomiting."
"Thanks…a lot" Pratt whined.
"No problem" She echoed the doctor, with a small smile. Although he was a talented physician, deflating Pratt's arrogance was a necessary safety measure, and was not without its entertainment value.
Susan sighed and looked at her watch, it was indeed 6am. She could go home – for a few hours at least. Tiredly she stood up and headed towards the lounge. She didn't see Carter heading towards her.
"Hey Sus…Ow"
"Sorry" She muttered brushing a blonde tuft out of her eyes.
"He's right, you know – you look exhausted, how long have you been doing the night shift for?" He asked.
"Since…"
"Oh" His brow fixed with realisation, "Do you know how she is?"
"No, I've called her apartment but I just get the machine…she hasn't called back…"
Carter followed Susan to the lounge, pushing the door open for her as it protested with a creak. A dark head emerged through the top of a lab coat, and the silver stethoscope was swung around the neck. She turned as the two entered, greeting them with a soft nod and an unsure smile.
"Morning Neela…How's Abby?" Susan cut straight to the chase, giving the young intern a searching look.
"I'm not sure…" She began tentatively "I haven't seen her for four days, partly because of my shifts. I don't think that she's sleeping I hear her walking around the apartment at night. This morning I knocked to see if she was okay and she reacted badly. I'm worried, but when I ask her she says that she's fine"
Susan's blue eyes grew wide with concern. She looked to Carter who wore a similar one on his face.
"Abby is stubborn like that" Carter added, "…she acts all strong, and she is… but only to a certain extent. We should keep an eye on her" he said in a concerned manner. "She wasn't the Abby, I know, when we found her in the ambulance bay…"
As he trailed Neela and Susan nodded in agreement, their eyes conveying their own wordless concern.
'One hundred and twelve…one hundred and thirteen…one hundred and eleven…dammit…one…two…three…'
Counting sheep didn't work. Right now, if she ever met the person who invented this useless cure for insomnia they would be subjected to some kind of unpleasant ER procedure, a rectal temp maybe?
Her heart thumped heavily inside her chest and she felt the blood rush through her body and her limbs. Every night since her kidnapping she had been unable to relax enough to let sleep envelope her senses. Every noise made her jump, a car door shutting, or loud engine noise provoked the images of them. Them wielding their metallic weapon, such a lethal plaything, not forgettingthe blood, "You've got to save him, bitch – or you go too" she kept recalling the haunting demands that still terrified her. Alternatively she would be numb, a blissfully thoughtless state that was equally sleepless.
The light that crept through gaps in the curtain showed that day had arrived. Abby was glad that the dark had passed but she expected to have to watch this cycle again, awaiting the orangey glow of evening into the purple twilight before night fell again, and she would still be awake.
Getting up off of her bed she ventured into the living room, flopping down on the sofa. Suddenly a loud noise filled the apartment causing Abby to jump about two feet in the air. Her heart pounded somewhere around her tonsils, a clammy sweat created a glistening film on her skin and left her to gasp for breath, much-needed oxygen had to fight for space occupied by numbness and fear. Coming to her senses she fumbled underneath the sofa cushions she was sat on, the T.V remote surrendered itself and she flicked off the offending noise.
Her head crashed backwards as the cushions moulded space for her. A sigh escaped her small form, her eyelids prickled despite the fact that they were heavy with tiredness. Unable to sleep or feel anything except fear, constant wakefulness caused days to blur into each other. She felt suspended in numbness. There was only one thing she knew that would guarantee a break from this constant fear. Send her into a comfortable oblivion and induce a much needed sleep. She had managed to avoid all thoughts of it for many months – but as she craved comfortable sleep, she began to crave this once more.
Venturing into the kitchen, for the first time in days, she hadn't thought about food all that much. Giving the mound of dirty crockery a brief glance, she headed towards her target. The small cupboard revealed its cargo of junk; Abby swept it all aside grabbing for a brown package at the back. She set upon her dining table taking a seat at the other end. She wanted to forget everything that had happened, leave the fear and the feelings behind, did she really want to walk back down a much trodden path. She always tried to be strong; she could fight this, couldn't she? She was a doctor now, she hadfulfilled her ambition – she hadn't been asscared as she once had been. It was thoughts like this that invaded her consciousness as she stared at thepackage satacross from her.
Instinct and a twinge of guilt had compelled her to visit and having arrived, Susan paused outside the door. Her finger swept over the buzzer until it hovered over the one labelled A. Lockhart. Abby would just respond like she had done to phone calls and ignore buzzes from downstairs. Through the glass she could see a man racing down the stairs. Susan moved just in time as he burst thorough the door. Susan caught the door before it shut again; with a brief glance behind her she entered the grey lobby of Abby's building.
The packaged screamed to be opened. She wanted the whirlwind of emotion to stop. She reached for the package; tearing the brown wrapping she felt the cool glass in her hands. She swirled the liquid around, its thick consistency mesmerised before she unscrewed the shiny lid. The pungent but familiar smell shot into her nose and hit her throat, she savoured the smell and got up to search for a glass.
A loud knock once again interrupted the quiet. Abby paused, looking at the bottle in her hand, her stomach flipped with guilt. She dropped it into the sink.
"Abby are you there?" She heard Susan's familiar tones speak through the door.
Casting one last wary glance at the sink, holding in a small breath she crossed the room and opened the door.
The green door opened a slightly, then fully as Abby answered it. Susan was met with yet another uncomfortable sight. Dark circles framed her eyes, their greyness emphasising her pale skin. Her dark hair was unwashed and lank.
"I called…" Susan began carefully looking over her friend as she stepped into the apartment.
"I know, I just, I just needed to be alone"
"How are you doing?"
"I'm fine" she said quickly, too quickly. Susan arched her eyebrows suspiciously and Abby spotted it "Really Susan – I'm doing okay"
"We're all worried you know, everyone, especially Carter, Neela and I…"
Carter? crept to the front of Abby's mind. Why was he worried? She pushed it out of her mind as Susan carried on talking.
"…I didn't know what to think, when you didn't answer the phone…"
"Susan"
"What?"
"I'm fine" Abby lied and Susan didn't believe it for a second, but Abby sounded peeved. Grudgingly and against her better judgement, she let it go. "Just one thing though…" she brightened thinking that her friend wanted to talk "I'm working tomorrow"
"I don't think that's a good…"
"Susan. I'm going crazy here…" and it was the truth. Abby was in desperate need of a distraction, one that didn't involve the possibility of a return to alcoholism, even if it wasreturning toa place that made her considerably nervous. Susan pondered for a second, a niggling concern stared at her in the shape of her friends fatigued eyes, but if she was at County she could keep an eye on her.
"Okay, but you catch up on charts first…and, no traumas on the first day"
"Okay"
Satisfied for now, Susan made her way back to Abby's door. "I've got to catch up with my two favourite guys" she smiled weakly, as Abby's face remained expressionless, "See you."
Susan felt the door shut behind her, her worry unresolved. She had to be resolved by the fact that she would be able to keep an eye on her friend.
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