AUTHORS NOTE: This chapter is not as good as the last so, depending on reader feedback, I may edit it later. Please R&R and keep reading people!

Natalie, Laura and Jemma were getting very bored. There's only so many times you can play 'I spy' locked in a cell without going slightly crazy. Jemma, in fact, had started to bang her head against the wall.

"That's not going to help!" Natalie snapped.

Jemma pulled her head away to reveal a growing lump on her forehead.

"Ooh fireflies!"

With that she crashed out cold on the floor.

"Idiot," Laura muttered, "I don't know about you but I'm actually looking forward to being interrogated!"

"Why!"

"Well…that Commodore was a bit of alright! I hope he's very…thorough….with his investigations!" she smirked, "I don't know what it is about him, but I think he's very sexy! Maybe it's the hat!"

Natalie looked at her sardonically and replied, "Laura…there's nothing 'about him', you just find every man we run into attractive!"

Laura looked hurt. "That's not true! I didn't like the hairy midget!"

Jemma recovered very quickly to shout "Well that didn't stop you inviting him back to our place!"

"Look…he was rich. He came from a very wealthy family of dwarves! I was going to take the money then kick him out!"

Before the debate of Laura's relationship with the affluent dwarf could arise, Mr. Regg came to call them to their interrogations.

"You first," he sneered, pointing a grubby finger at Jemma, "and no protesting or it's flogging for ya!"

"Ooh whips!" Laura cried in delight.

Regg grabbed Jemma firmly by the hand and led her above deck, where Gillette was waiting to lead her to the Commodore, his one true love.

"Look, I'm not a criminal!" Jemma fumed.

"Really?" Gillette smirked, looking her over with disgust, "Because you certainly LOOK like one!"

"Pillock!" muttered Jemma under her breath.

Norrington didn't even have to start questioning before Jemma panicked.

"I DIDN'T DO IT! YOU CAN'T PROVE IT! IT WASN'T ME!" she shrieked.

"SHUT UP!" Norrington sighed, "I won't arrest you for being on board the ship alone, but I need to find out if your intentions were illegal…do you understand?"

Jemma threw herself at Norrington's feet, sobbing in terror.

"Please, I wasn't being bad! I don't want to die! I shall be your eternal slave!" Jemma snivelled, "I SHALL KISS YOUR FEET!"

"YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT!" Norrington gasped, "Please remove yourself from the general area of my toes!"

"But I want to kiss them!"

"NO!" he shrieked, "I have a phobia of anything…sexual….to do with feet!"

Jemma sat up in revulsion, "I am in no way sexually attracted to your foot!"

Norrington, realising Jemma would be as much use to his inquiries as a toad with three breasts, sent her to be watched by Regg whilst Natalie was put under the spotlight.

"So, it appears you're the leader of this little 'gang'?"

"I am the most intelligent, superior and beautiful of them all, yes."

"It was your idea then. This little," Norrington paused trying to think of a word, "…escapade?"

"No. It was my idea to leave our home because the couple next door, who I might add are in their mid 90s, are constantly at it like rabbits!"

Norrington wrinkled his nose.

"Exactly!" Natalie continued, "Commodore Norrington, I am very sorry we ended up on this ship. No criminal action was intended. We were desperate girls, in desperate times! You would surely have laughed if you had seen us swinging on a rope at 3am!"

"No I would not! I do not laugh. I do not smile. I do not cavort. I am not jolly. I am not happy. I am not fun. Now if you don't mind, I have to query your friend."

Natalie sighed as she slid off to join Jemma with Regg.

Laura pouted as she saw Norrington (and also thrust her chest out a great deal more than was necessary!), ran a few fingers through her hair and fluttered her eyelashes.

"Right. I needed to hear YOUR side of the story," snapped Norrington irritably.

"Oh but you're so TENSE, Commodore! Are you sure you wouldn't like a massage? You know, to relieve your…stress."

Norrington sat up straight and inhaled deeply through his nose.

"No thank you!"

"Are you sure?" Laura asked.

She got up and walked over to Norrington and ran a finger across his chest. Giggling at his clearly terrified face she pushed him onto a chair.

"Don't look so scared!" she laughed, "I won't hurt you….well not much anyway!"

Norrington whimpered in apprehension as Laura straddled him. He had never met a woman this forward before. They had always been so quiet, meek and reserved. Although he was confused (and frankly, scared shitless) he was secretly enjoying it. He raised his hand to his head, before Laura grabbed it.

"No!" she smiled, "You can leave your hat on…"