A/N: Hey everyone…This is just something I've been sitting on for awhile and after reading HBP I think I should post this. I added a little and yeah…It regards to a certain Gryffindor and I hope you like it.

The Other Side of Me

July 18

The mask I wear is as old as I, Never have I taken it off…well, except once.

They just don't understand. There's more to than the know it all, the brainy one of the "Golden Trio"

There is more to the library haunting bookworm that they all know.

They don't know that there's a free spirit dying to come out, dying to play, to joke, to cause mayhem; dying because she is buried deep inside.

A spirit who truly appreciates and admires the Weasley twins for who they are…admires and envies them.

They are able to show who they are and not fear of being shunned by those they loved, while I remain the same.

No one would understand if I became a different person overnight, or over the summer for that matter. No one would because that is not what is expected of me. I am the studious one, the practical one, the logical one, predictable. They wouldn't understand…

No one but Dumbledore, but he's gone now….I miss him so much. He would have accepted me, but now it's too late to show him.

Maybe I could change bit by bit…No.

I must suppress who I am for the better of everyone.

Maybe one day I can reunite with those who knew me when I did not wear a mask, and knew me the best.

Reunite with those who seen the crazy, carefree girl known as Avalon.

Maybe, one day, I can release the true person from the horrendous prison where she kept, and join the chaotic joy of releasing all that is expected and embrace the unexpected.

Maybe my friends can meet the true me and accept me for who I am.

Maybe introduce my two best friends to my dearest friends of the past, those whom Mum and Dad have forbidden me to see again, and dance and play once again, bringing a small amount of relief from the pressures of the war.

Maybe my parents will one day stop expecting me to be like them, it is obvious I will not due to my being what I am. Maybe they will see me for the first time, as the others: Marie, Lance, Tobias, Meridid, Jonathon, Avery, Shelly, Terry, Raevyn, and Drea, have long before.

Maybe they will accept who I really am and not shun me as I fear.

So many 'maybes'.

But not yet, for now, I shall keep on my mask until that day comes.

I may indeed be a Gryffindor, but I do not have to the courage to be who I am…not yet.

Soon maybe…soon…