Rating: R
Warning: The rating should be enough of a warning.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of Beyblade.
Summary: Saint Ann's Hospital is a place for mentally ill young adults, and when a new patient is transferred to their facility the world there is turned upside down for a handful of the other patients. Can they overcome their problems and be deemed cured, or will they become yet another slanted mind?
A.N.: Review people! I want to know what you think when you read this! Good.. Bad.. Whatever; just let me know!
Slanted Mind
Chapter VII - Mocking Bird
The fight the day before had left Saint Ann's Hospital for young adults to be on strict lock down for three weeks while everything was being sorted out and dealt with. All the nurses and orderlies had been dismissed from their jobs for good, and new ones hired by Doctor Judy Tate herself. The police stuck around for a full week, yet even then Boris still couldn't be located but was clearly linked to the disappearances of many drugs as well as several children during the incident. Many other patients were transferred to other hospitals to continue with their treatments, and the whole mess created chaos that lasted a few weeks after the complete lockdown was over. Some things never returned to be the same as it had been before, but there was always a clear and constant buzz of insecurity around the hospital. The comfortable air never really returned, and to a handful of patients it was a wakeup call telling them to get out of the hospital all the more quickly.
It was only the second day of lockdown before most of the patients grew restless, and upon wanting answers for himself while also trying to figure out why he was reacting the way he was Tala went forth to question Damian. The Russian was sitting up on his bed with the other teen curled up on a beanbag chair on the floor and staring at the far wall across the room. "Damian why didn't you go back to your own room with Tyson like you were supposed to?"
There was a pause before Damian answered, his aquamarine eyes lifting to rest upon Tala slowly. "You don't want me here?" The question was avoided completely, as if not wanting to answer it. "I'm sorry... I'll try to stay out of your way, just pretend I'm not here." Damian spoke softly, as if hurt or sad that his presence wasn't wanted. Rolling over onto his other side he hugged the stuffed black panther Midnight to his chest with loose arms.
"But why are you here? Why are you in this hospital, why did you follow me into my room? You avoided my last question; I'd like it to be answered as well as all my other questions that I have for you, like why are you unaccounted for around two years of your life? You're like no one else here, as if everything is an act, and you adapt to everything entirely too quickly. You know things, and I want to know what you know." The tone of Tala's voice suggested that he was growing irritated as well as annoyed at the lack of answers that he was receiving.
As the stretch of silence began to grow longer the teen on the bed grew more impatient, very unhappy that he wasn't being answered at all. Azure eyes narrowed darkly, and as if he was trying to pluck more patience from out of nowhere Tala clenched his fists at his side. He didn't want to loose his calm, but it was quickly coming down to it despite the fact that he was most at ease around Damian.
Playing with the hem of his shirt's sleeve Damian remained utterly quiet, as if oblivious to the fact that he was being asked questions of any sort or that he wasn't even alone in the room. Aquamarine eyes were staring dully at the wall that the beanbag was situated against, as if there was something there that only he saw.
"Damian.." It was a simple warning from Tala, his voice almost a growl as he ground out the name between clenched teeth. He was about to say something else when the other teen finally spoke up, his voiced question innocent sounding while it dealt a lethal blow to Tala and his reality, "Tala, who hurt you so badly?"
He didn't understand how Damian knew, as he hadn't told anybody about why he was diagnosed with post dramatic stress disorder. The only people that knew were a small group of police and detectives in a whole different country, but other than them nobody knew what had happened to him or what caused his disruptive nightmares.
"I don't know what you're talking about Damian, no one hurt me-"This time it took not even a sliver of a second for the pale powder blue haired teen to respond. "You're lying to me, and to yourself as well. Someone hurt to over, and over, and over again. Who hurt you, who made you suffer so badly that you have nightmares in your sleep?"
"You don't know what you're talking about Damian, this is all in your head. No one has hurt me, and everyone has nightmares from time to time. Just answer my questions." Azure eyes narrowed at Damian's back, watching as the teen shifted to sit up and turn to face him. His glare didn't seem to effect him as much as he would've liked because the aquamarine eyed youth simply sat there calmly.
"If I answer a question you have to answer one of mine, and if you want to ask another I get to ask another as well. It's the only way either of us are going to get answers from one another." Shifting to sit Indian style Damian let his words sink in, Midnight resting in the crook of his right arm. For the most part he was healing rather well, the bandages from his hand gone to reveal only a few scratches while most of his bruises were faded away as well. The teen looked like a normal kid sitting there, albeit wearing clothes too big for him and carrying around a plushy.
"Fine. My first question is why are you here at Saint Ann's Hospital? I want the truth, not some made up answer just to get me to stop asking questions." Tala was rewarded with a soft nod, watching as a thoughtful pair of aquamarine eyes drifted off of his form to stare up at the ceiling.
"Why I'm here.. That's a difficult question to answer. I suppose I'm here because I'm trying to find a place where I belong, someone whom I can trust with my own life. No, I'm not exactly here because I have some disorder, but I suppose if anything I truly do suffer from some light form of depression. I'm here at Saint Ann's because I was sent here like any other kid, though only more so because someone wanted me to be sent here." Damian stopped there, as if on purpose to raise the sense of curiosity of wanting to know whom had sent him here among other questions as well. "My turn to ask a question; Tala, who hurt you..?"
Taking his time to digest the information Tala didn't answer right away, his lips setting into a grim line as his own gaze soon looked away. He was uncertain if he wanted to share the information that he had told no one before, and he was afraid of being treated different because of it. He was afraid of the nightmares that claimed his sleep and tormented his soul. Taking a deep breath and letting it go as a light sigh Tala finally answered the question, though not as in detail as Damian had done. "My father hurt me.."
There was no response from Damian, showing that he wasn't going the press the answer any further. Tala was grateful for this, but it didn't lessen the discomfort he was in. It was as if admitting those words to somebody tore down his secure little world and left him naked to the harsh facts of reality, which in truth he wasn't ready to deal with. Willing himself to hold his composure Tala went on to ask another question, "You said that someone wanted you sent here, so who was this person?"
"I don't really know the person's name, but he was a nice enough old man. At first I thought he had wanted to adopt me, though after more thought about the matter it was clear that he didn't want to and only wanted to send me here for some purpose of his own. He was friendly about the whole matter, but he didn't mention anything about me getting hurt while being here. I've been in worse places before, and this is a nice step up from those other places I've been at before." A light smile graced Damian's lips, as if very fond of the fact he was in a place better than he had been in beforehand. His demeanor was calm, as if not disturbed by the fact he was bringing up things about himself that could at some point cause pain.
At the smile Tala frowned, his gaze having drifted back to the aquamarine-eyed youth on the floor when his question was being answered. There was no doubt that the other was going to ask more about his past, and he was trying his best to prepare himself for what he knew was coming. Holding his breath he waited for the question about what his father had done to him to come, yet he was mildly surprised when it didn't come but the question that was asked surprised him even more because he didn't have an answer.
"You looked out for me when Robbie molested me, and again when I was sedated from having had another scuffle with Boris. You also tried to protect me from Robbie again, why? I had gotten the impression from others that you didn't care what happened to other people around here other than Kai, Rei, and occasionally Tyson." Giving his head a soft tilt to the side Damian waited for his answer, his gaze constantly wandering from one thing to another yet never really falling to rest upon Tala himself.
Why was a very good question indeed, and even as the silence between them pressed on Tala couldn't find a proper answer to give Damian. He didn't know the answer to the question, yet he desperately wanted to know it. What he felt for Kai and what he felt for Damian were two completely different things, yet he couldn't really place the feeling. He knew that Kai was a friend, someone he could trust as well as talk to when he needed it, but was that how he felt towards the teen before him? Tala knew he felt some form of trust towards Damian, but it was somehow different. He never tried talking to him like he would with Kai over the years, but he was content with the comfortable and mutual silence they had around one another. With a soft sigh Tala leaned back against the wall his bed was against, the look of intense thought clearly written upon his features.
Could I say I like him as a friend? Yes, I feel as if I can trust him with much more than what I trust Kai with, but does that mean Damian is just my friend? No, that doesn't sound nor feel right. I feel as if he has more of a connection with me than a simple friend, but do I like him like that? Could I like him like that after what my father has done to me? Would it make the nightmares and memories go away if I let someone inside my barriers? I just don't know, and I don't understand.. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to voice what I might possibly feel for him, to answer his question truthfully. Dr. Tate always told me that life is full of risks, maybe I should take one of those risks now.
Stretching out his legs and slipping forward Tala moved from off of his bed, his sock clad feet taking him across the carpeted floor only to kneel in front of Damian. This seemed to really get his attention, aquamarine eyes finally resting upon Tala and meeting his own azure ones. The calm demeanor seemed to fade away to a less unsure one as Tala shifted to settle next to him upon the large pile of beanbags. "I don't know why Damian, I really don't know why I did.."
"Tala.. If I tell you something, will you promise not to hold it against me..? I don't want people to hate me, to despise me, to look down upon me.. but I know some things that you should know. It's different this way, do you understand? If I tell you then you can do something about it--to stop it," stated Damian slowly, as if he was unsure how Tala would react to this.
"I won't hate you--what possibly could you have to say that would make me hate you? No one is perfect; it's their faults you learn to lo--like. Come now, look at me and say what you need to say.. We do have several weeks to just sit around in each other's company," commented Tala, as if reassuring the younger male that he didn't have to say what he wished right now if he didn't want to.
"There is a place, maybe two hundred miles from here, that's out in the middle of the desert. The building looks deserted, but it isn't--all the life is underground where no one can see. It's a dangerous place… many dangerous people there. However it's not a prison, but I suppose you would call it an organization. They call themselves Biovolt, the scientific minds of the future. If anything they're sicker than anyone of us at the hospital is with their twisted ideas of science. They're not sane, I can tell you this.. Crazy men and women, all of them.. So bent on experiments that would ultimately kill one from utter insanity--claw your own eyes out, chew your own tongue off, beat your head to a pulp against a brick wall. Their experiments just want their freedom.." Pausing Damian looked up to find Tala watching him with a slow deep in thought look, and after a moment of letting it all sink in he continued.
"I speak as if I know this place.. Because I do. I knew Boris as well before I even came to this hospital--he went to that place where I was at for two years, the very same two I went missing for. This place isn't somewhere you want to end up.. Ever. It's a cruel place, and despite the fact I was already a little strange in the head--my own doing seeing as I really just wanted people to leave me alone for the time being--they made it so much undeniably worse. As for what they did to me I couldn't really tell you because I've forced myself to forget it all, to know that it happened, acknowledge it, yet not remember the finer details. But anyways," rushed Damian, wishing to change the way his choice of words were going.
"That missing medication…the drugs, the children--that is where they all go. Some of us come back from there, though most never again see the light of day. The reason for me being shuffled around is that I voluntarily forced myself to be moved from place to place trying to keep out of their grasp--they still got a hold of me. These medications and drugs.. They're being used on the kids after they've been altered in some way shape or form. It becomes like an addiction, a high you can never get off from without going into a withdraw that might indeed kill you. In the long run it changes people.. It makes them different in their own way, though very many do go quite crazy and kill themselves--it's freedom to them-- the only way possible." With a sigh Damian rolled onto his side and curled up, hugging Midnight tight to his chest and taking deep breaths of the scent it held.
"With what they did to me," he continued before Tala could say anything. "It made me see things I really didn't care to. I could figure people out within moments--knowing all their strange hidden quirks and know how to very well adapt to how they act. I see what people try to hide.. Pictures are always the worse because they show more than I should truly know. I hate it--I hate being like this, not being able to control what I see and don't see. I want to take time to get to know someone.. I want to have to learn about them the hard way, not by simply just being able to tell." By now Damian was near in tears, voice breaking as he tried to blink the wetness from his eyes.
There was the sound of shifting before Tala pulled the curled up form into his lap, arms slinking around the slim waist that the baggy shirt Damian wore hid. He wasn't sure what to say to all this, as he was still trying to absorb and make sense of it all. He knew Kai needed to hear all of this, yet he also knew he needed to get them all out of the hospital and into normal life. With a low hum of thought Tala pushed everything to the back of his mind for now--Damian trusted him enough to tell him this, to not use it against him. There was still weeks left for them to discuss this another time, but for now the other needed comforting, and soon a song came to mind.. A lullaby he'd heard as child. Indeed it was a bit childish, but it was the only thing that came to mind at the moment.
"Hush, little baby, don't say a word.
Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird
And if that mockingbird don't sing,
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring"
With the faintest of smiles Tala took on of Damian's hands, running his fingertips over the back then turning it over to do the same to the palm. Ending at the ring finger he made an imaginary circle around it to be like an imaginary diamond ring. Before continuing Tala wove his fingers in between the others and grasp his hand, holding it until Damian would want it released.
"And if that diamond ring turns brass,
Mama's gonna get you a looking glass
And if that looking glass gets broke,
Mama's gonna get you a Billy goat"
Moving his free hand Tala made a circle in the air to act as a looking glass, pretending there was a handle and holding it out in front of himself. However as if the glass had broken her made a crumbling motion with his hand before making the head of a billy goat out of the shadows with his hand.
"Hush oh hush the night birds call
Hush oh hush the dark must fall"
Damian was relaxing more now, settling down though there was the occasional sniff and wipe of the eyes. Right now they were both just teens sitting there in a dark room together, nothing wrong with either of them mentally or physically-- they just wanted comfort from each other's presence.
"And if that Billy goat don't pull,
Mama's gonna get you a cart and bull
And if that cart and bull turn over
Mama's gonna get you a dog named Rover"
A shadow figure of a dog's head was made now, and after a moment Tala used his finger to write out the name 'Rover' into the air. This got a smile out of Damian, and Tala mentally made a note of this before continuing with the lullaby to help soothe both himself and Damian.
"And if that dog named Rover don't bark
Mama's gonna get you a horse and cart
And if that horse and cart fall down
You'll still be the sweetest little baby in town"
Making the shadow figure of the dog again Tala made a barking motion with it before dropping his arm to wrap back around Damian's waist loosely. He didn't want to seem overly clingy, but Tala felt he just wanted to be close to the other. To forget the past, to act towards him like he hadn't done towards anyone else before.
"Hush oh hush the night birds call
Hush oh hush the dark must fall.."
As his voice faded away Tala let silence take over, listening to the now calm and rhythmic breathing of Damian--he had fallen asleep. With a content sigh the red head leaned back comfortably, allowing Damian to rest back against him so they were both less likely to wake with cramped muscles and irritable with one another.