Warning: This is slash. SLASH! Remus/Sirius pairing. If you don't like it, don't read it. It's that simple. This chapter is a bit on the M (R) side, so be warned.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related characters/names/places/events/etc. belong to JKR and Warner Bros. I'm just a poor little fangirl that likes to borrow them.
Sirius pressed his ear to the door, straining to hear the conversation taking place in the dormitory. He cursed the thick wood that muffled the words floating from the room beyond, making the sentences barely distinguishable from the laughs and grunts.
"…waiting outside the door…" said a voice that Sirius recognized immediately as James's.
"…uncomfortable touching me…" said Remus.
Sirius only caught snatches of sentences and long lapses of silence.
Before he had time to react, the door he was leaning on pulled away, and Sirius stumbled clumsily into the room. Somewhere along the way he lost his balance and the wood floor rushed up to meet him.
He pushed himself up, rubbing ruefully at the spot where his head had connected with the ground. The first thing he saw was a pair of brown shoes, followed closely by the mocking face of their owner.
"Sirius," James admonished with a stern glare. "Were you trying to eavesdrop? Because Moony here has just agreed to talk to you and I wouldn't be making him mad, if I were you." James's face slowly broke out in a smile and he winked down at Sirius, holding out a hand to help him up.
James hauled him up and exited quickly, whispering a quiet but distinct "Good luck" on the way.
"Sirius?" called Remus's trembling voice. Sirius traced it to his own bed, the closest to the door. The curtains were pulled around the head and foot of the bed, obscuring it from view.
Sirius cautiously walked around to face his friend. His heart nearly broke again at the wretched condition of the boy.
Remus's eyes were red and swollen and rimmed with dusky blue rings. The dried out rivulets cut by tears were all-too-obvious in the afternoon sunlight rolling in waves through the window.
"Moony," said Sirius, his voice suddenly hoarse and hesitant. Remus was carefully avoiding his eyes, and a faint blush had crept onto his cheeks.
"Sirius, you…uh…wanted to talk to me?"
"Huh?" Sirius mentally shook himself; he had been distracted by the curious way in which the light filtered through Remus's hair, making him look as if he had a golden halo perched above his head.
"James said you wanted to talk to me," repeated Remus, cocking his head inquisitively.
Sirius could feel his face burning—but from embarrassment or arousal he didn't know. Nodding, he sat warily on the edge of the bed. His heart was threatening to force its way through his mouth. He still kept his gaze away from Remus, focusing instead on the loose threads on the blanket.
"I wanted to ask if you were okay. You've been acting strangely all year, and now…" he trailed off, not sure how to approach the topic delicately. He was never one for tact. "I'm just worried about you, Rem. I wish you'd tell me what's wrong."
"Siri, nothing's wrong. I'm fine. Today I just sort of—lost control. I don't know why I did that." Remus sniffed lightly, adding in a whisper, "I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize. I don't have any right to dictate what you do with your l—love life."
"But you do. I want you to." Remus said it almost casually, and it took a few seconds for the words to penetrate Sirius's stagnant mind.
"You—what? What does that mean?"
"I mean, you're my—friend. My best friend. That's more important than any fling."
"Oh, right," Sirius said numbly. Remus continued to talk, but Sirius's mind was stuck on what Remus had just said. Friend. That's all I am…a friend. Who cares if I'm his best friend? I can never be anything more.
Remus abruptly lapsed into silence, shattering his reverie. Sirius turned around to finally face his friend and found that Remus had pressed up against the wall, silent tears running down his face.
Sirius—his body no longer under his control—immediately crossed the length of the bed on his knees and pulled Remus into his arms. A jolt of ecstasy spasmed down his spine the moment their bodies touched. Sirius ignored it—or tried to.
Instead of pulling away, like he had expected, Remus buried his face further in Sirius's shirt and wrapped his arms firmly around his waist, fingers digging into his back. The sobs quickly subsided, but Remus clung on, and Sirius didn't spare a thought on stopping him.
Remus and Sirius had embraced frequently in the past, but this was different. There was something decidedly—almost romantic—about this hug.
Sirius lost track of time, holding Remus in his arms. All too soon, the boy pulled away, face flushed and grinning sheepishly.
"Sorry," he mumbled.
"Don't be."
Remus looked at him strangely, almost expectantly.
Sirius cleared his throat. The room was too hot, but he was shivering.
"Uh…Remus. I have to tell you something. I…"—suddenly Sirius's courage failed him, and he abruptly changed direction mid-sentence—"I picked your name out of the hat." He did his best to keep himself from blushing, but his body refused to heed his control. "But you don't have to—you know. I'm sure James and I can find an antidote to the spell we used. Even if we don't, it's only three months." Sirius said all this in the space of four seconds, watching his friend anxiously.
Remus looked surprised—but not repulsed—and when he spoke, his voice was husky and strangely enticing. "You—got my name?"
Sirius nodded, feigning an immense interest in his fingernails. He jumped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
"Siri?" Remus's face shone with a mixture of worry and apprehension. His speech came out in a breathy whisper. "I don't mind. You can—kiss—me if you want. I understand if you don't want to, but I don't want you to end up with three months of purple pimples."
"You'd do that? For me?"
"Only if you want me to."
Sirius had not realized the boy was moving closer, but suddenly he felt Remus's breath on his face. He hesitated, looking into the boy's amber eyes and trying to decipher the emotions that spun under the surface.
"Remus? Are you sure?"
"Positive," Remus breathed, closing the painful gap between them.
Sirius closed his eyes at the contact. They moved their lips slowly in rhythm. Thoughts vanished; emotions took over. Sirius's heart screamed in rapture as his nostrils filled with Remus's musky scent. Remus's lips felt soft and delicate between his own, and Sirius wound his hands around the boy's waist, desperate for more contact. Remus's fingers found their way into his hair, stroking the scalp sensually. The boy pressed closer, kneeling up so that he was now the one in control.
Remus's tongue was doing amazing things to Sirius's lower lip—and he wondered vaguely where Remus had learned to kiss. Teeth gently nipped at the tender flesh, causing him to moan in pleasure. Callused hands moved down the back of his neck, slipping quietly under the fabric of his shirt. Remus licked urgently at the parting of Sirius's mouth, and Sirius gladly obliged. Remus was inside him instantly, sensuously rubbing his tongue against Sirius's.
He couldn't believe it, but Remus's ministrations actually caused Sirius to whimper in lust. He was hardening fast, and he thoughtlessly pressed his hip against his friend's only to find that there was already something stiff and rather insistent pushing back.
Before he could protest, Sirius was pushed down onto his back, the contact of the kiss never breaking. Remus's hands had moved from Sirius's shoulders to somewhere near his navel, pushing his shirt upwards. Sirius moaned and pulled Remus closer. The throbbing pain in his groin was becoming unbearable. Remus indulged him, thrusting slowly against his aching crotch.
"Mmm…Moony…"
Sirius broke their kiss, letting his head fall back in pleasure. His fingers were digging into the boy's back. His breathing was coming in erratic gasps and pants.
"Ah! Remus, I'm going to—"
Remus let out a sound that was half chuckle, half growl. He moved his lips to Sirius's neck, licking and sucking. His hand found Sirius's nipple, and gently scratched it with the tip of a nail. Sirius lost any control he had right then, thrusting forcefully and eliciting a loud groan from the other boy. Remus squeezed the nipple hard, increasing the friction between their groins.
Sirius was no longer coherent. "Mmm…harder…Moony, please…I…need…harder."
The pain and pleasure of it all was too much for him to handle—yet he wanted more. Sirius's head felt as if he had taken one of the Muggle drugs his cousin had given him once. But this high was not the result of some synthetic chemical. This high was Remus—and Sirius was already addicted.
Remus abruptly pressed his lips to Sirius's in a passionate kiss. The pressure between his thighs was at breaking point, and he arched his back to push even harder against Remus. The boy sucked on Sirius's tongue, setting every one of his nerves on fire.
The rhythm of their rocking sped up. Remus's lips pulled away in a loud cry as he convulsed. Sirius was not far behind. He climaxed a few thrusts later, quivering in ecstasy before falling back onto the bed in exhaustion. Remus rolled off him and lay pressed against his side, panting feverishly.
It was only then that the realization of what they had done dawned on him.
Oh, shit.
TBC…
DEMONSBLADE: Several firsts here in this chapter. It's the first time I've used a swear word in a fanfic. And it's my first real smut scene.
SIRIUS: And about time, too.
REMUS: You know, I quite like wearing the trousers.
SIRIUS: Uh, Remus? You're a bloke. You're supposed to wear trousers.
REMUS: No, Sirius. It's a Muggle saying. It means I like being the one in control.
SIRIUS: Oh. You know, you're right. I must admit you're quite kinky in this scene.
JAMES: You guys really like this bondage stuff, don't you?
SIRIUS: James, don't you ever get your head out of the gutter?
DEMONSBLADE: Anyway, you finally got the long-awaited fluff.
SIRIUS: Not exactly bum ravishing, but enough for now, I suppose.
JAMES: When do I get my snog?
SIRIUS: You're not important, James—Ouch!
DEMONSBLADE: Stop that. Of course James is important. Don't worry, James. Your snog's coming up in the next chapter. Don't get too excited, though.
JAMES: Why not?
DEMONSBLADE: Let's just say that Lily's a lot feistier than you give her credit for.
SIRIUS: I guess she's going to wear the trousers in that relationship.
JAMES: Shut up, git.
SIRIUS: Aww, is ickle Jimmy getting mad?
REMUS: Hey, look. I think you got another flame. Apparently this is a "screwed up" story.
DEMONSBLADE: Cool. Thanks!
SIRIUS: You're weird, you know that? Almost as bad as that Lovegood girl.
JAMES: Well, Demon's not quite that bad. At least she doesn't think you're some deranged singer.
SIRIUS: True.
DEMONSBLADE: Thanks for all the reviews, guys. And sorry this is up so late. I hope you liked reading the smut as much as I liked writing it. I feel like I'm pushing the rating here, so tell me if you think I should make this an M story so that I can have a real citrus scene. Adieu!