Special Thanks to bandgsecurtiyaw for your reviews. It helps keep me going knowing that at least one person is reading this story. This is Chapter 5, enjoy.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all associated characters, etc. belong to JK Rowling. The idea of Dawn belongs to Joss Whedon.
The last week of the summer holiday was rather uneventful. Luna did come by on Saturday, but she spent most of her time with Ginny and Dawn so Harry didn't see her much. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. There was relief that he didn't have to be on his guard around the quirky blond, but there was a bit of disappointment too. As much as he hated to admit it he had come to like her and respect her and wanted to spend more time with her. Her oddities aside, Luna had an interesting way at looking at life and he wanted to explore her mind further.
Instead, he found himself rather bored. Ron had left his homework for the last minute as usual and Harry was left alone much too often. The irony that he wanted to be alone and didn't like it when he was, was not lost on him. It only added to his frustrations. He had started counting the days until they would be heading back to Hogwart's. They would all be staying at The Leakey Cauldron Saturday and Sunday, and then on to King's Cross Station. Between the Grangers, the Weasleys (including the Potter children), and the Lovegoods they had booked an entire floor; even Fred and George were going to be staying with them. Harry was looking forward to the weekend and was hoping for a few good laughs.
It was the Tuesday before term started and once again he found himself alone. Before, when he was at the Dursley's, he found himself wanting solitude, but now that he had it he wanted nothing less. Ron was busy with homework, the girls didn't want him hovering around, and Mrs. Weasley was doing secret things for the Order. So, like he often did when he was alone, he worked his way to his favorite spot in the garden, on a fallen log next to the small pond. Harry liked it because he was hidden from view by the large hedge and he could sit and watch the fish and the water skimmers and the dragonflies buzzing over. It was really the most serene place at The Burrow, which was definitely saying something in a house that often held seven people; nine if Bill and Charlie were home, and more if there was company. Harry liked the Weasleys, but sometimes it was just too much to handle.
Harry let his mind wander as often happens he found his thoughts turning to Sirius. Horrible images kept leaping into his mind. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Sirius falling through the veil or Sirius being chased by Dementors, or a drunk and lonely Sirius imprisoned in Number 12 Grimmauld Place. Sometimes it all came to him at once; jumbles of black cloaks and veils and scraggled black hair. Sometimes he thought back on fourth year when Voldemort came back to power, and on Cedric and Wormtail. It was too much for anyone to handle, much less a sixteen year old orphan boy who was a famous wizard and who was both loved and hated by the Wizard World, where there was a death prophecy hanging over his head and everybody was out to hurt him and where everything he loved was taken away and…
Harry sprang up and turned his wand on the hedge behind him. Something had moved, he was sure of it, and he wasn't caught off guard. He stared into the brush, keeping his wand raised, and said loudly, "Come on out! I know you're there!"
Harry felt a wave of relief wash over him as he recognized the petite form of Luna Lovegood. She, on the other hand, strolled out of the bushes as if she came through hedges everyday. "Hello, Harry," she said as she walked toward him. "Mind if I sit?" She pointed at the log bench where Harry had been sitting and without waiting for an answer she sat and opened The Quibbler. Harry was still standing, he hadn't yet gotten over his shock, and he had a look of confusion plastered on his face. He hesitated before taking his seat at the other end of the log.
Luna spoke first. "There's something on your mind."
"Obviously," Harry said with a sneer. He wasn't in the mood for a discussion right now and was still angry at being startled by Luna's unusual arrival. He was letting his emotions control him again.
"Yes, well… Daddy often tells me I like to state the obvious. So do you want to tell me what it is?" Luna wasn't at all upset with Harry's unpleasant answer, which he was grateful for.
"I was hoping you could tell me," Harry said, "I just don't know what's what any more."
Luna gave Harry a long, penetrating stare, roving her eyes up and down his body, taking in every essence of his appearance. He was just starting to become uncomfortable when she began talking. "No, I'd like to hear what you have to say. Or not say. You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to. I have my Daddy's magazine, you know." She lifted the Quibbler to draw his attention to it and quietly opened the magazine onto her lap and began reading.
Harry was at a loss of what to do. He had come to the garden to be alone, but he had been alone too much lately and it hadn't been making him feel any better. He looked to Luna and began to say something, but stopped before he made any sound. How do you begin talking about something so personal, so painful, so confusing, with somebody you really don't know all that well. Harry thought back to that day in the corridor and how of all people Luna was the only one that made him feel better, if only a little. Harry started once more. "Do you remember that day in the corridor?"
Luna marked her place and set down her magazine, giving Harry her full attention. "Which day?"
Harry thought it was obvious, but then to Luna maybe it wasn't. "When we talked about Thestrals and… and your Mother." He stumbled over that last part, not wanting to be the cause of any pain. Luna nodded her head as if this sort of question was commonplace. "I still think of him… Sirius, I mean. I can't get over that he's… no longer with us," Harry said, using the euphemism to avoid the word 'dead'. He still couldn't bring himself to face the finality of the word.
"What do you mean?" Luna asked. Harry's ire began to grow. How could a Ravenclaw be so daft? "He's always with us."
Harry interrupted. "If you're going to give me some nonsense about 'he's always in your heart' or 'you carry him inside you', then forget it." He hadn't meant to snap like that, but some people just didn't understand. Harry knew he would never forget Sirius and didn't need another corny phrase being spouted at him from yet another person who didn't understand him. He glanced at Luna, expecting her to be upset at his outburst, but she was as serene as always.
"Godric Gryffindor died over one thousand years ago. As did Merlin. Jesus died two thousand years ago. Gandhi died decades ago. They are all still with us. They changed the world for the better. Sirius did, too. For you to sit here and mope and sulk is not what Sirius lived for. And it isn't what he died for, either." Luna's voice was rising with the force of righteous anger. "I never knew him, but Sirius was a good man and he suffered a lot, and I'm not going to allow him to suffer more because some sixteen year old boy can't get over himself."
Harry was shocked by her outburst. The only time he had seen Luna truly angry was when Hermione criticized The Quibbler. He hadn't been aware just how much fire burned under her cool exterior. He kind of liked it. He asked his next question rather calmly. "How do you know he was a good man?"
"Because you do," was Luna's only response. Harry must have looked rather pitiful because her expression softened before she continued. "I know you're grieving, Harry, and it's a normal reaction, and a necessary one. But you can't stop living your life. Sirius was imprisoned for twelve years in Azkaban and spent the rest of his life on the run. Ginny told me he spent the last year of his life virtually imprisoned at headquarters. Don't spend the rest of your life imprisoned in your grief."
For Harry this was a revelation. He saw what he had been doing to himself and considered Luna's point. It was disrespectful to Sirius for Harry not to live his own life. Like Luna said it would cause Sirius to suffer if he saw Harry like this. And hadn't she said before they would see each other again? He would no longer put up his walls and trap himself in his own despair. He could still grieve for Sirius without shutting down himself completely and he would do whatever he could, whenever he could, to honor Sirius the only way he could… by living.
The next few days were far more enjoyable to Harry. He still pined for Sirius and found himself grieving, but he now had a confidant in Luna and she kept him from falling too deeply into despair. After constantly finding him alone and despondent Luna invited him to spend time with the girls. Although he was kind of the odd-one-out, he found himself enjoying spending time with his sister and Ginny, and especially Luna. He was hardly aware when it happened, but somehow she became another member of their close-knit group. Ron and Hermione would always be special, but Harry found joy in expanding his circle, even if it was his little sister and her school-chums.
The week finally drew to a close and Harry and Dawn, along with everybody else, readied their things for the big trip to Diagon Alley. Friday night was their last night in The Burrow and Dawn had something special planned. She had never understood why they had never had a burial for Sirius. To be properly honored, there must be a ceremony, she reasoned, and Sirius never had one. So after dark, a bonfire was started and everyone took turns giving a sort of eulogy, telling their favorite Sirius story to the group. Dawn went first, followed by Mrs. Weasley. Ron told the story of how his leg was broken that night under the Whomping Willow, and put such a spin on it that everyone laughed, while Ginny showed him up by telling a story that would have had Mrs. Weasley furious had Sirius still been alive. Ginny's story involved herself, Sirius in his Animagus form, a bucket full of stunned Doxies, and some skullcap powder. Harry got lost halfway through and never did figure out what the Spell-o-tape and the rubber gloves were used for. He himself recounted the time he saw Sirius at the Quidditch stadium and thought there was a Grim. He would have felt rather foolish about it, but Mr. Weasley followed with a very similar story that had happened just after the adoption of Grimmauld Place as order headquarters. Luna had never met Sirius, so for her part she took an old copy of the Quibbler's "Stubby Boardman" article, and folded it into a figure of a small dog. The group grew solemn, and as had been arranged previously, Mr. Weasley charmed the origami figure so that it would move and bark, before handing it to Harry. Harry gave it a loving pat on the head, before passing it to Dawn, who said a few final words, unfolded the page, and put it to the fire. Only then was the ceremony complete and Sirius was properly laid to rest.
He never told Dawn, but Harry was glad for that night and felt like Sirius had been with them then as they laughed and told stories. He went to bed late that night, but woke up feeling more refreshed than he had in a long while, just in time for the trip to Diagon Alley.
Saturday came upon them and Harry couldn't have been happier. He had slept well and woke up in an optimistic mood, but it seemed he was the only one. Mrs. Weasley was running back and forth in her usual bustling manner, making sure everybody had their things for school since they wouldn't be coming back. Ron woke up grouchy and Ginny and Dawn were a little since Luna had flooed home early to be with her father. And then just as they were getting ready to leave for Diagon Alley Ginny's suitcase fell off the handle and spilled books and clothes everywhere. It was too much for Mrs. Weasley's frazzled nerves and she launched into one of her booming tirades. The trip Harry had been looking forward to all week started out horribly and Harry couldn't wait to get back to school where things would quiet down. One glance at Dawn confirmed she felt the same way.
Never a fan of the floo network, Harry was glad when the trip was over and he landed on his feet in The Leaky Cauldron. Actually, he would have fallen over had Ron not been there to catch him. He caught Dawn as she came through the grate, followed by Mrs. Weasley and Ginny, who were of course used to traveling by floo and didn't need the help. Once the group was assembled they headed for the brick wall and into Diagon Alley.
Diagon Alley was just as busy as Harry remembered it being on the day before school and they agreed to split up, but to meet back at the Leaky Cauldron for dinner. Harry and Ron made a beeline for the Quidditch shop to look at the new styles of brooms. Harry was happy to see that his Firebolt was still top of the line, but noted that it was being approached upon by the new Cleansweep 77. They reunited with Dawn and Ginny at Madam Malkin's where the girls were going over the newest styles. This year it was fashionable for girls to wear long robes that trailed the ground as they walked and they were discussing the relative merits of each minute difference in style. Some of them were all right, but Harry wondered how useful they would be for everyday wear. It would be much too easy to get your feet caught and trip and he silently gave thanks that he wasn't a girl and didn't have to worry about that sort of thing.
He was just about to voice that opinion to Ron when his eye was drawn to a strangely dressed man walking past the window. Harry didn't know what it was, but something about the man didn't seem right. He tried to point him out, but the man had passed before he could get Ron's attention.
After buying their new robes the four of them, two Weasleys and two Potters, stopped at Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Stand to recharge their energy. The group spent some time laughing and joking around while eating their ice cream before Harry saw the man he had seen outside Madame Malkin's. He pointed him out to the group and commented that the man didn't seem to appear like he belonged. The robes he was wearing were an unusual dark brown color and were rather heavy for this time of year. The front was tied with a simple hemp belt, he wore no cap, and his shoes were more slippers than anything else. And just as unusual as his clothes was his demeanor. He looked like he was afraid something would be catching up with him every minute. He kept looking over his shoulder as he walked and didn't seem to have any idea where he was going. He was hopping from store to store, like he was trying to escape something, or was looking for something, or maybe both. He even walked past Fred and George's Joke Shop three times in succession, seemingly unaware that he had done it before. Harry's heart leapt to his throat when the man turned toward the group and caught Harry's eye. Harry saw the familiar flash of recognition when the man realized who he was and then thought he saw relief flash over the man's features before Harry looked away. When he looked back to the crowd the mystery man was nowhere to be seen.
None of the group could quite place what it was about this mystery man that had them spooked, and Harry couldn't explain why the man made him nervous, but it led to a more subdued atmosphere than before. They finished their ice cream in silence and went off to do more shopping. The first stop was Flourish and Blott's where there long lines of Hogwarts students buying this term's books. It was here that Ron spotted Hermione. She entertained them with stories of her summer traveling while they entertained her with their stories of The Burrow. She was especially interested in the funeral they had held for Sirius.
"Well I think it was a fine idea," she began, "I don't know why there wasn't one to begin with. Surely the Order could have taken the time to do it."
"We haven't heard much about the Order this summer," Harry said, "I'm not even sure what they're up to." He was interrupted by a sharp pain in his calf, courtesy of Dawn.
"Shut up," she said through gritted teeth and pointed out the reason for her concern. Draco Malfoy had just sauntered through the door.
"Move aside, move aside," he said as he pushed his way toward the head of the line. He was making good progress, too, until he came to Harry's group. Ginny was the first to stop him.
"No you don't, Malfoy. We've been waiting patiently and I'm not giving up my spot to you."
"What do you know about it, you blood traitor. Hasn't your family sunk low enough? Now you have to create a bigger problem by blocking me? Now out of the way!" Draco went to push Ginny aside but found Ron's wand blocking his path.
"Don't you have somewhere else to be, Malfoy?" You always knew Ron meant business when he used his confident voice. "I hear there's plenty of cells in Azkaban. You can get a seat next to Daddy."
Draco reddened, in embarrassment or anger Harry couldn't tell, and backed away from the group. Harry hoped he would just leave, but Draco seemed to feel the need to get the last word. "You'll be sorry one day, Weasley. With father no longer in the picture I'm due to inherit the Malfoy fortune once I come of age. Then we'll see who finds themselves in Azkaban." He then turned and stormed out.
"He can't do it," Hermione began. "Having money doesn't mean he can run the Ministry."
Ron cut her off, "Well, Lucius always got whatever he wanted didn't he? Remember Buckbeak? I doubt it'll be any different when Draco does it." Harry smiled to himself as he thought of what Madame Bones had told him, but chose to remain silent. The others would find out soon enough.
The group chatted and talked freely until they reached the counter, bought their books and left. Hermione still had a bit of shopping to take care of, but the others were nearly done. Dawn still needed a wand, while Ron and Harry hadn't yet bought potion supplies. Ron, Harry, and Hermione started toward the apothecary, but Ginny and Dawn decided to split from the group and head to Ollivander's.
"Don't get lost," Harry joked as they left, but a few minutes later Ron noticed they were looking in the windows at Madam Malkin's again. "There better still be gold in our vault after you're done," Harry yelled to Dawn just she walked through the entrance. She chose to remain silent, and returned his comment with a rather rude one-fingered gesture.