Chapter 18
"Mom..." "Come in Angel and sit down." Dr. Martin said. She was putting all of her mind on controlling her reaction to Angel.
Angel came in and sat down at the table. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Neither one of them trusted their voices. Angels hand and arm was shaking so badly that he put it under his other arm in order to keep it still.
"Mom, can I give you a kiss and hug?" Dr. Martin immediately became more tense. She was fighting with herself to do what was right for Angel. She wanted to take him in her arms so bad but her fear of the demon Angelus was greater. She took a deep calming breath and stretched out her arms to him.
Angel went over to her and got on his knees in front of her. Even on his knees he was still tall enough to look straight in her eyes. He moved forward very slowly and gave her a light kiss on her cheek. As he touched her with his hand's he could feel her start to tremble. The smell of fear filled the room. As he touched her he could smell the fear roll off of her in great waves. Angel continued though, he drew closer to her very slowly. When she felt his arms around her she couldn't stand it anymore and gave out a loud scream, pushed him away and went to the corner of the room and sank to the floor.
As she cried great soul wrenching sobs she kept on saying over and over again 'I'm sorry Angel I'm sorry but I can't do it yet. It's nothing that you have done, it's just me, I'm sorry.'
Hunter went to Dr. Martin and held her in her arms. She looked at Angel with sympathy for him in her eyes. Angel sank back on his legs as he leaned against the table. The tears started to fall. He wasn't crying for himself he was crying for his mother and what had been done to her that would take her away from him.
"I'll be here Momma when you're ready." Angel stood up then and left the room. Giles was standing outside in the hallway and he saw Angel leave the room and run over to the stairs that would take him upstairs. Giles went to the stairs and looked up to see how far up Angel was going. Angel went to the 5th floor; not as a human goes up the stairs but as a Vampire, with one great leap upward he reached the top of the stairs. Giles heard Angel go into one of the rooms and then it was quiet.
Giles went into Mary's room then. "I'll take care of her now Hunter." Giles went to the corner and picked Mary up and took her to the bed. Hunter pulled the covers down and helped Giles to remove her blouse and skirt. "Hunter would you give me something that will make me go into a deep sleep for the next 8 to 12 hours. I'm not sleeping very well, my thoughts are constantly on the rape and I need to have a dream free sleep." Mary asked. "I think that is a good idea, I'll be back in a few minutes." Hunter said as Giles and her finished putting Mary to bed.
Hunter left to get something that would make Dr. Martin sleep all day and into the night. By the time she returned Dr. Martin had calmed down. Giles was lying next to her and holding her in his arms. Hunter gave her the shot and Dr. Martin went to sleep almost immediately.
"I know you haven't had anything to eat Giles. Would you like to go and get something and I'll stay with her?" "Yes I would really appreciate that Hunter I am hungry." Giles waited for a while to make sure that Mary was sleeping peacefully. Hunter brought a chair over to the side of the bed.
"You certainly have changed Hunter since Angel's back was hurt several years ago. You seem to be much happier. You speak more then in ten words or less. I guess what they say about love is true." "Yes I have changed. Mary has helped me a lot also. I hope and pray that I will be allowed to grow old with Mike, I am tired of living Giles. I love Mike and I want to live out the rest of my days with him. I truly have seen everything in my 4,000 years of life Giles and I want to have what Angel has. I want love that will go with me to the grave and beyond. I want Mike and I to be together throughout all eternity. Do you think I am asking for too much?"
"No, I don't think you're asking too much because I am asking for the same thing. I am hoping that my relationship with Mary will be long lasting. We have the problem though of living in two different cities. At least you can just move to Los Angeles to be with Mike. Everyone here still needs Mary to stay here. She is like the matriarch of this group. Her word is the only one that can over rule Angels. Did anyone tell you what happened when Angel, Spike and Connor went out into the Irish countryside and played Tarzan?"
"No, I haven't had a chance to talk to anyone. What is this Tarzan game?" Hunter asked.
"Apparently it's a game that Angel and Connor created. Cordelia said that they both like watching the old Tarzan movies so they created this game of tag that has to be played in a way that only Angel and Connor can play because of the way they are able to move around. While they were in Ireland and Spike, Buffy, Wesley and Fred were there Connor talked Angel and Spike into a game of Tarzan but apparently when it was time for Angel to give up the role of leader because he had been tagged he wouldn't give it up. So the next morning Connor told his Grandmother about what Angel did and Mary called him on the carpet and chewed him out for not playing fair. She told him that because of his position he always had to be careful and to always set a good example for his son and everyone else. Then she smacked Connor on the back of his head and told him to stop being such a tattletale." They both laughed at the thought of Angel being called on the carpet.
Hunter checked Mary's vitals. "I wish I had been there to see that." Mary was in a deep sleep now and no dreams seemed to be bothering her. "Why don't you go and get something to eat Giles."
Giles started to go downstairs, he stopped for a moment and looked up stairs, for a moment he thought that maybe he should go and talk to Angel, he decided against it though and continued down the steps to get his breakfast.
As Giles walked to the kitchen he looked in Wesley's office and saw him at his desk so he went in to talk to him. Wesley looked up when he heard Giles come in.
"Uh Wesley I think that you should know that Angel went in to see Dr. Martin for the first time since she came back. It didn't go well, Dr. Martin pushed him away and started screaming. When Angel left the room he jumped from the second floor balcony to the fifth floor balcony in one leap. I heard him go into one of the rooms then close the door. It was quiet after that."
Wesley just leaned back in his chair and thought about what Giles had said. "I know what he must be thinking of right now because it's been on my mind also ever since they took Dr. Martin. I've been asking myself how can we ask the women in our lives to be place themselves in such a vulnerable position. Our work puts them all in danger, and I don't mean just from getting hurt in a battle. Right now they are focusing on Angels women and using them for sex. I think they feel like they are able to hurt or control Angel by using Cordelia and Dr. Martin. But Giles all of our women can be used like that. All of them are in danger every minute of every day and night. How do you deal with it Giles? You have Buffy, Willow, Tara and Dawn. Buffy must think of what they could do to Dawn all of the time." Wesley looked up at Giles with tears in his eyes. "I don't think I would stay here if they did that to Fred. I don't think I could stand it."
"I have often thought of the same thing Wesley. I have learned over the years that Buffy can take care of herself and if she can't then their probably isn't anything that I could do to prevent it. I know that Spike thinks the same thing because we have talked about it before. Buffy and Spike know that they most likely won't be able to grow old together. I think perhaps that's why their love making is so intense they want to make love each time as though it was their last time. I know that we all tease them about how often they are doing it but we could probably learn from them." Wesley had his head down as he listened to Giles.
"I am going to get some breakfast and I'll probably be upstairs all day and night with Mary. I think you should talk to Cordelia about Angel. She might know already but you should check with her." Giles left then to get something to eat.
When Giles re-entered Mary's room 30 minutes later he carried a tray with a wrapped sandwich, some fruit and a couple of cans of Cherry flavored Coke. He put the sandwich in the refrigerator along with the Coke. He saw Hunter looking at him. "I thought I would bring her a sandwich for when she wakes up. I'm sure she will be quite hungry." "That's a good idea she hasn't had anything since yesterday. I'll leave you now if you should need anything Giles please don't hesitate to call me." "Thank you Hunter I promise that I'll call if I need to." Hunter left then and Giles checked on Mary then went to the couch and turned the TV on.
Upstairs Cordelia was taking care of her daughter and preparing a diaper bag to go along with her. She needed to go to Angel and she needed to give him one hundred percent of her attention so she was going to let Tara and Willow take care of her for a few hours. She had several bottles of her breast milk in the bag so that she didn't have to come down to feed her. She dressed her daughter up in a bright colored yellow sleeper then put her in a blanket and took her down the hall to Willows door. She knocked at the door and Willow answered. "Come in."
Cordelia opened the door and saw the two women at the kitchen table playing cards. "Good morning ladies. Could I possibly impose on you to do some baby sitting duty for a few hours?"
"Of course we would love to watch her for a few hours. Take as long as you want." Willow said as Tara picked up Kathleen. Kathleen was giggling at Tara as she played with her.
"Are you going out someplace?" Willow asked. "No, Kathleen needs to share me with her Daddy right now. I'm sure you heard what went on this morning when Angel was in with Dr. Martin." "Yes we couldn't help but hear it I almost dropped my cup of coffee when I heard her scream." "Well Angel was hurt pretty bad by her response to him. He's up on the fifth floor right now trying to deal with it. I think that when I come down later this afternoon that we women will have to have a long talk. Angel is wondering if we women should be involved in Angel Investigation or if he should just close it down. First I was attacked then Mom. It's been just as hard on him as it has been on us. So if you need me I'll be upstairs on the fifth floor. I don't know what room yet though so you will just have to call out or open every door." Cordelia gave her daughter a kiss 'Be good for your Aunt Willow and Tara.' She left then to look for Angel.
Cordelia walked by the doors trying to get a feeling of his presence. She made it all the way to the end of the hallway and finally felt that he was in the last room. She carefully opened the door and stood in the doorway as she let her eyes adjust to the dark. When she finally was able to see she looked around the room and saw Angel in the furthest corner. He had pulled a mattress down that was standing in the corner so that it was now laying on the floor. She could see Angel laying on it.
Cordelia carefully closed the door as quietly as possible then walked over to the mattress and removed her shoes then laid down beside her husband. She wished that she could hear his heart beating like he did so that she could tell if he was sleeping or not. She couldn't even tell if he was awake by his breathing. So she did the next best thing. The mattress they were laying on had feathers coming out of the sides so she grabbed one and started tickling his nose with it. When he tried to push whatever was tickling his nose away she pulled the feather away. She started doing it again when he settled back down.
"What are you doing Mrs. Martin?" "I am testing you to see if you are awake or not and if your not I am trying to wake you up." "Oh, as long as I understand the reason for your torture of my nose." "What are you doing all alone up here?" "I'm just thinking." "No wonder I smelled smoke." "Very funny, ha, ha." "What are you thinking about?" "I am thinking about whether I should be asking the women in my life to put their lives on the line. When someone wants to get to me, they go after you women. If something should ever happen to Kathleen...I don't know what I would do."
Cordelia was lying on her side and watching Angel. She could see the tears falling down the side of his face.
"Angel I started in this business when I decided to join in and help the Scooby Gang. No one asked me to join the gang I just did my usual moves and wormed my way into it. Of course I have to admit that there was this handsome hunk of a manpire that belonged to Buffy but I didn't let that stop me. We women have talked about the possibility of these things happening to us many times. Especially after I was raped. All of us women, including Buffy, had a meeting and we discussed the danger of what we do. Mom was there with us all of the time. I think what we should do is have another meeting between all of us and discuss this. You men have to understand that we women know what danger we are walking into."
"I know that you all understand and except the danger of the work that we do but you don't understand how hard it is on us when you women are hurt. You don't understand how bad we feel and how we feel that it was all our fault that you have been hurt. It just tears me up inside that I couldn't protect you when those teenage vampires attacked us."
"Angel how do you think I felt when you were tortured and delivered back to us crucified on a cross? How do you think I feel every time that I had to patch you up or help Mom take care of you? Do you think that you men have a monopoly on caring about what happens to our loved ones? This discussion is at an end now Angel. We will wait to discuss it further when Mom is feeling better. I want you to make wild passionate love to me now Angel because that is the only thing that you can truly control."
They hadn't made love in a long time. Not totally anyway, not the way only he could make love to her. He turned towards her and proceeded to do exactly what she told him to do. He made love to her with all the skill that he had developed over the years. He made love to her as though it was the last time he would be able to do it. He kissed her lips and his tongue searched out hers. They intertwined as lovers intertwine their arms and legs when making love. Once he started making love to his wife he realized that he was very hungry for her. He pursued her aggressively and for a moment he forgot himself and made Cordelia cry out in pain. Angel pulled back. "I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" "Yes you big clown, when you pushed yourself inside of me so hard my back pushed a spring in the mattress." Cordelia sat up and moved over, and there it was. It wasn't very big but it had a sharp end. She turned around so that he could see her back. "Check it Angel, it felt like it scratched me pretty bad." Even though it was dark in the room Angel could see as though they were in the day light. "It's not too bad, I'll clean it for you." He licked her skin clean then continued running his tongue over the rest of her skin. As he breathed on the skin of her back she gave a slight shudder.
"What's wrong Angel? You're making love like you have something to prove." "I do. I have to prove to myself that I am a man and the extra stuff belongs to that part of me that's a Vampire. But I a man first and foremost."
Cordelia turned around to face him, they were still standing and Angel picked her up and pushed her against the wall. He kissed her all over and lifted her up until he could reach her breasts. He started sucking on her breast hard and drained it within a minute then he started on the other one. When he was finished he lifted her higher. Cordelia wrapped her legs around his waist and he lowered her slowly until he slid inside of her gently. Cordelia raised and lowered herself slowly while Angel laid a path of kisses from her lips to the side of her face then finally to her neck. He started to lick her neck and gave it light nips and sucked at the skin then licked it again. Cordelia knew what was coming so she started to lower and raise her hips more quickly. Angel lowered them to the mattress again and quickly brought them to the highest point of their love making. At the last second he turned his visage into that of the Vampire, bit into her neck and drank as he brought them to that mountain peak. Since they were on the fifth floor Angel didn't bother to cover her mouth as she peaked. He let her call out his name in ecstasy. She repeated his name over and over again until she was drained. Cordelia reached up to him with her hands and pulled him down so that she could reach his lips then kissed gently.
"No woman could ask for a better friend, lover or husband. Remember that you said you wanted to paint my portrait?" "Yes, I haven't forgotten." "When you are ready to do it I want you to promise me that you will stand for your portrait to be painted also." "Your very wish is my command my wife." Angel kissed Cordelia again and again. Their exhaustion from their love making finally overtook them and they stayed on the mattress and slept in each others arms.
Almost five hours later Cordelia was awakened by a soft knock on the door. "Cordelia are you in there?" "Just a minute Willow." Cordelia jumped up and put her outer clothes on then she went to the door and opened it and stepped out of the bedroom since Angel was still sleeping with nothing on. "What's the matter Willow is Kathleen okay?" "Oh yes she's fine." "It's just that we've given her all of the milk you left in the bottles and she is still hungry. The first time we fed her she took two of the bottles and we only had one left. Now she is ready for another feeding and the one bottle didn't satisfy her. Since you're the only one that has what she wants I thought I would bring her up here before she wakes up Dr. Martin."
"Okay Willow I'll take her. Has Fred started dinner yet cause I'm starving?" "Yes she has I think she is making a beef stew. At least that's what it smelled like." "Good, as soon as I get done feeding her we'll be down. Thank you for taking care of the little Munchkin." "Any time Cordelia, any time." Willow left and Cordelia closed the door. She went to the mattress and settled herself down on the mattress next to Angel. She removed her blouse and put Kathleen to her breast. Her mouth searched for the nipple and when she found it she started suckling noisily.
"Lucky for you my dear daughter your Mama's breasts have filled up again. Your Daddy was so greedy he took all that I had to give at the time." Angel was feeling much better now so he got on his knees and looked at his daughter. "What your Daddy wants your Daddy takes even if it's the food right out of his little girls mouth. Ha, ha, ha!" "Kathleen just looked at him out of the corner of her eye. Angel tried to gently push her mouth away from Cordelia's breast but Kathleen just pushed his finger away and put her hand on her mothers breast as though to say 'Mine'." Cordelia and Angel just laughed at their daughters greediness.
Angel put his hand on Kathleen's head and smoothed her hair away from her face. Her hair was growing now and had started to form little ringlets. It had also started to take on a darker coloring. "She reminds me more and more of my mother. Things that I had almost forgotten like the color of her hair. I think that if anything should happen to you or her I would just wait until the morning sun came up and walk into it."
"You can't ever do that Angel, nor could I if I was to loose either one of you. We would have to learn to cope with our loss and find some way to continue." "Why should we have to continue in this world? It is too harsh, I don't want our daughter to grow up knowing that so much ugliness exists in the world."
"Angel don't you remember one of the basic rules that we were taught in catechism. We were taught that suicide is a mortal sin. Our lives are not ours to end whenever we want. Only God has that right to end it. Our lives belong to God and not to ourselves. We made Kathleen when your sperm and my egg joined together but God gave that spark of electricity that started her growing. All we did was give the basic ingredients that were needed for her to grow into a human being. God was the one that made her grow, He is the one that gave her a soul. Just as you and I were made and given our souls. Promise me Angel that you will never entertain that idea again otherwise there is no hope that you and I will be joined forever in Paradise."
Angel looked into her eyes. "I promise that I will never try to end my life in order to stop suffering." He kissed her tears away and she wiped his away with her fingers.
Cordelia looked at her daughter then, she had stopped nursing and had gone to sleep. As she usually did when Angel was with her she gave him Kathleen to burp while she cleaned herself. She got dressed then and took Kathleen from Angel after he got a satisfying burp from her. Angel dressed also and they all went downstairs to join the rest for dinner.
When they joined the rest at the dinner table Angel held Kathleen while Cordelia warmed his glass of blood up. She gave him a cup of the stew with meat, some gravy and also gave him a couple of slices of bread. She then filled a small bowl for herself. Angel drank his glass of blood then started playing with his daughter. To every ones surprise Angel gave a loud belch. "Excuuuuuse me everyone. I don't know where that came from." Cordelia just smiled at him. "I do but you're too big for me to burp you." Angel turned red from embarrassment.
For the first time they heard Kathleen giggling and everyone turned their attention towards Kathleen. Unfortunately Angel chose that time to hold his daughter up over his head and before Cordelia could say anything Kathleen's last meal came up right in Angels face.
Everyone cracked up while Angel ran to the kitchen to clean his face and clothes. When he returned he took Kathleen back from Cordelia so she could finish her dinner. "Now 'that' my dear Kathleen is a mistake I won't make again. Especially since it doesn't taste very nice when it comes back up from your tummy." He tickled her tummy and was rewarded with a giggle.
Angel leaned back in his chair and drank the rest of his blood. He looked at Connor sitting down at the other end of the table. "How are you doing with your work Connor? I know you have a list of things you want to accomplish before the next school year starts."
"Well I have my driver license now, I passed the test just the other day. I took my GED test last week and we're waiting for the results. Has anyone checked the mail today? I was hoping that the results would have come in today." Connor asked.
"How do you think he did Wesley and Fred?" Angel asked.
Wesley and Fred looked at each other. "Wesley and I think he did very well. He had a hard time with math at first but then with a little help he caught on and now he excels at it. We think that he should have passed with flying colors." Ever since Fred had married Wesley her rambling when she talked had ceased. She got to the point and that was it.
"With what I have seen so far Angel your son will be well suited for the task ahead of him. He thinks like you do and all he is lacking is your years of experience. For his schooling I want him to take classes that would prepare him for a position with a police department. Of course that isn't what he would do but all of the classes that he would take would be perfect for the type of work we do. Now as for Kathleen I have no idea what kind of classes she would need to take. We are going to have to do some investigation while she is growing up as to what would help her and Angel Investigation the most."
"Well that's easy Wesley she needs to take math and computer skills. Since she will be taking over for me as well as Cordelia she will need math for witch craft plus Latin would be a big help." Willow said in a matter of fact way.
"What do you mean, take over for you?" Angel asked.
"I thought you knew Angel. Remember when I first put my hand on Cordelia's stomach before Kathleen was born? Remember how she didn't pull away from me like she did from even her own brother?" "Yes I remember she didn't even hesitate she went right to your hand." Angel said.
"That is when I knew that she was a witch. I could feel it in her mind. I could feel the power in her. She will be more than a Seer for her brother she will help to protect everyone here and be able to take care of herself without any problem." Willow said all of this as though everyone knew the same thing.
While everyone still had their mouths open Wesley spoke up. "Well I guess I'll know what Kathleen will be studying and with whom."
Cordelia was the first to recover from the news about her daughter. "Well I for one am happy that she will be able to protect herself better. Now she will be able to protect her Mommy and Daddy as they get too feeble in their old age to help."
"That is hard to imagine Angel as too old and feeble to protect everyone else." Wesley said as he put his note pad away. They were all quiet for a while as they contemplated their own mortality.
Angel looked down at his daughter when she looked like she was concentrating on something. "Ewww the dumping of nuclear waste is in progress." Angel tried passing her back to Cordelia but she was faster and she started to pick up the plates. "Well I guess we can start clearing the dinner plates while you change her diapers and she hasn't had a bath today so you can take care of that also. Maybe it will help her to sleep through the night so that mommy can get a good nights sleep for the first time since she was born."
"I guess I can do that, not unless we have a volunteer at the table. Someone like her brother?" Angel asked. "Not me, besides I've never even changed her diapers yet and I wouldn't know how." Connor said.
"Well I guess there is no time like the present to learn." Angel rose from the chair and started up the stairs with Connor in tow.
"I have to get this on the camera guys." Cordelia said as she went running up the stairs behind them.
"Well I guess that leaves just us to clean up." Fred said as she started to clear the table.
"Willow, Tara and I can take care of it Fred since you made the dinner. Why don't you go and spend some time with Wesley." Buffy said as she started to pick up the dishes. Willow and Tara started to pick up dishes also along with the rest. By working together they had the dinning room table cleared within just a few minutes. Everyone went to their own rooms after that. When Connor was through helping Angle with Kathleen he came down stairs looking for Gunn to play a game on the Play Station with him.
The PTB had other plans for them for the night though as they sent a vision to Cordelia. Angel called everyone and told them about the vision. Buffy, Spike, Wesley, Connor and Gunn followed Angel to the weapons cabinet and they went running out of the back doors.
"Well at least your Daddy and big brother were able to clean you up and give you a bath." Cordelia wanted to try keeping her daughter awake for a while so she sat on the bed, turned the TV on and started playing with Kathleen.
Around midnight she heard them coming through the doors. A few minutes later the door opened and Angel came in. He was all dirty from the battle with the vampires that had attacked the people at the beach. "How did it go?" "Okay, we were able to get there before they killed anyone. I guess the PTB are starting to clean up their act. They're giving you the vision before anything actually happens. I'm going to take a shower." "Angel since you were on the beach you probably have sand all over you why don't you go to the balcony and remove your clothes out there and leave them on the chair outside. I'll shake them out tomorrow morning. No one should be able to see you if I turn the lights out." Angel was to tired to argue so he just looked at her and said "Yes dear." He then went to the balcony after turning the lights out and started to remove his clothes. He heard something close by and turned around and saw Wesley on his balcony doing the same thing. "You too." "Yeah the first thing she said was go out to the balcony and remove your clothes." After they removed their clothes and carefully draped them over the patio chairs they said goodnight, and went to take their showers.
The next morning everyone came down at the same time. After the previous nights activities the men were hungry for a large breakfast. When Cordelia came down she saw Fred cooking up breakfast steaks with scrambled eggs and toast. "Can I help Fred or do you have everything about done?" "You can put some fruit out on the table Cordelia, I have some nice cantaloupes, honeydews, and strawberries that you can prepare." Fred told Cordelia.
Buffy came into the kitchen also. "What about me Boss?" "You can warm up the blood for Hunter, Angel, and Spike." Fred told Buffy as she started to make more scrambled eggs and put the steaks on for Angel and Spike. She had already made the breakfast steaks for the rest and since Angel and Spike took theirs very rare she didn't have to put them on the grill until the last minute. Fred cooked them just long enough to warm up the inside of the meat.
Within a few minutes the ladies brought the food in and everyone dug in. Five minutes later, every ones attention, was drawn to the stairs. Walking down the stairs slowly was Dr. Martin, Giles and Hunter. Dr. Martin was holding onto Giles arm, she had a beautiful soft green nightgown on along with a large robe that matched the nightgown. The gown flowed slightly behind her as she came down the stairs. Hunter had helped her to put some tiny braids at her temples that were pulled to the back. The rest of her hair hung loosely down her back. Her complexion was much brighter this morning since she had been able to get a good nights sleep.
As Giles guided Dr. Martin to her customary chair at the table, Angel stood up. The rest of the men followed his example and stood up as Giles helped Dr. Martin to sit down and push her chair in for her.
"Please, sit down gentlemen." Dr. Martin said once she was settled in. Giles poured her some coffee and a glass of orange juice. "What would you like to eat?" Giles asked her. "I think I would like some scrambled eggs, fruit and a slice of toast." Giles proceeded to put the food in her plate and in his own. When he was done she noticed everyone watching her.
"Please, everyone, continue to eat your breakfast before it gets cold. We'll talk later."
After everyone was finished eating and leaning back in their chairs and having coffee Dr. Martin cleared her throat to get everyone's attention.
"I wanted to thank all of you for the flowers, get well cards and the prayers placed inside of each card. I also wanted to thank you for understanding my need for a quiet and peaceful recovery." Dr. Martin stopped when she heard someone coming in through the back doors.
Dr. Thompson came in and saw that everyone was at the dinning room table. "Good morning everyone." They all answered with a good morning and Mike then went to Dr. Martin and kissed her on the cheek. "How are we feeling this morning Mary." "A lot better Mike I was just thanking everyone for their kindness while I've been recovering. If you haven't eaten yet I'm sure we can make some room for you." "No thanks I just had breakfast, I'am just going to pull up a chair over here by Micky here." Hunter looked at Angel and gave him a look that let him know that if he said anything he would suffer for it. Angel just looked up at the ceiling as though he hadn't heard anything.
Everyone, moved over a little and gave him room, for his chair, next to Hunter. Mike put his chair next to her and gave her a light kiss.
"Well to continue I also wanted to tell you all that I am feeling a lot better thanks to Giles and Hunters care. I am having one specific problem because of the multiple rapes. Since they were all demons from another dimension I am having a problem with accepting the presence of my Angel and Spike. It isn't Angel and Spike the men, that repulses me, it's the demons they carry with them that I am having a problem dealing with. I accept Hunter because she is a woman."
Dr. Martin was starting to hurt after sitting in the hard chair for a while. "Giles could you get me a pillow to sit on I'm starting to experience some difficulties." Giles went to get the pillow that Cordelia kept in Angels office. Mary stood up when Giles brought the pillow and put it on the chair. When she tried to sit down though she couldn't sit down without moving the pillow back further. She looked at Giles and laughed 'I seem to be to short now to put my behind on top of the pillow.'
Giles laughed at her and then put his arm under her legs and picked her up then sat her down on the chair. "Thank you." They all laughed at her predicament. Giles sat down and patted her on the head 'Your welcome little girl.' "That's okay I'll let that pass this time since you helped me." To let him know that it didn't really bother her she said it with a smile.
"Now to get back to what I was saying; remember Angel how I hypnotized Cordelia, and why I did it?" "Yes, you did it because she couldn't stand for me to be out of her sight. She was also a lot better after."
"Well I need the same thing right now. Because I am a psychiatrist I can reason some things out by myself. I understand what causes some feelings, how to deal with them and so forth. My mind seems to be hiding from me the reason why I am have a problem with you coming near me. I have been rethinking the rape over and over in my mind so much that I haven't been able to sleep and give my mind the rest that it needs. Yesterday after you left I asked Hunter to give me something to make me sleep for at least eight hours so that I could deal with what I need to do today. I asked Hunter if she could hypnotize me and take me through the rape, but she has declined since she has never done it without a professor being by her to guide her through it. I knew that Giles has done it before with Buffy so we tried it this morning. For some reason though when he started to hypnotize me I started getting ...uh...I started getting..."
"She started to get turned on every time Giles tried hypnotizing her." Hunter blurted out. "I could hear her heart start to beat faster, her breathing became more rapid and she started to sweat. It was like watching a porno flick. She had me getting so hot that I almost jumped Giles myself."
Dr. Martins face turned beet red and everyone tried hiding their smiles.
Buffy turned her face away from everyone. Her face had turned red she was so embarrassed when she heard this about Giles.
It took at least fifteen minutes for everyone to stop laughing. "That's okay Mom I start getting hot just thinking of Angels Tattoo on his back." Cordelia said.
After Dr. Martin was able to get control of herself she continued with what she was saying.
"As I was saying Giles can't hypnotize me so that leaves only one other person that I know of that can do it. Hunter said that you can hypnotize me Angel."
Angel became real quiet then and everyone else did also when they saw Angels reaction to what Dr. Martin had said.
"Did Hunter tell you how I do it or why I used to use it all of the time?" "No, I didn't say anything about that. My thinking Angel was that all we need for you to do is hypnotize her then I will take over. If you lose control of yourself Mike and Giles can pull you back before you cross the line." Hunter said.
Angel stood up and threw his napkin down on the table then started to walk back and forth up and down the length of the table. After doing this several times he stopped and kneeled at the side of Dr. Martins chair. When she started to move away from him he was careful not to touch her or even her chair.
"Angelus hypnotized our victims in order to get control of them. He would often take the women where everyone could see us. People would always just think that we were lovers when it was a woman. We would just take the men into an alleyway or behind some bushes. They wouldn't scream because we had complete control of them. What I am afraid of Mom is that Angelus may push me to go further and what we call the Blood Lust will take over and I won't be able to stop myself from taking your blood. It happened when someone used a mystical poison to try and kill me and the only thing that would save me was the blood of a Slayer. Mom I almost drank Buffy dry. I became lost in the Blood Lust. I don't know why but for some reason I stopped and I was able to take her to the hospital where they gave her a transfusion." "Yes Angel I understand but I trust you to control yourself. But because I don't trust Angelus Mike and Giles will be there also. Spike and Buffy can stand out in the hallway so that they can call them for help if they need to."
Dr. Martin could tell by the look on Angels face that he was still reluctant to do what she asked. "Angel do you want me to continue like this. Look at me, I am pulling away from you as far as I can while sitting. If you tried touching my hand I think I would scream." When Angel didn't respond she stood up from her chair then.
"Angel I am going up to 412 now. I will expect to see you there within 20 minutes. If your not there in 20 minutes then I will be going to my room to start packing and I will be leaving to go and stay with Giles while I recover." Dr. Martin and Giles left the table and started for the elevator.
Angel stood up and called to Dr. Martin. "Mom." Dr. Martin stopped and turned to Angel. "Yes Angel." "Mom, I am going to bring Cordelia with me because I may respond to her voice where I won't respond to anyone else." "That's okay Angel as long as she leaves as soon as possible. It won't be good for her to be there when Hunter is guiding me through the rape."
Dr. Martin and Giles entered the elevator when the doors opened and went upstairs to the forth floor. Angel went to Kathleen and picked her up from the bassinet and went back to his chair.
"What do you think of that Kathleen? Your old man has been given an ultimatum. Never in a million years would I have thought that you three women could control me so easily that if you say jump, I say how high." Kathleen seemed to be reaching up for him. Angel held her up to his face and gave her a kiss. His daughter grabbed his lip and pulled. "Owe you little rug rat." Angel pulled her hand away.
"I think we better go upstairs now before Mom pops a stitch." Angel gave Kathleen to Connor. "Thanks a lot Dad, she's wet." Connor exclaimed as soon as he put his hand on Kathleen's diaper. Angel turned and looked at Connor, 'Is that why my shirt is wet?' He turned and went upstairs laughing all the way.
Angel stopped in his bedroom and changed his shirt. Cordelia, Buffy, and Spike went on ahead to 412. Cordelia went into the room and had a seat by the kitchen table. A few minutes later they heard Angel outside of the door talking to Spike and Buffy. Angel leaned against the door for a moment and took a deep breath. He opened the door then and walked over to Dr. Martin, who was standing by the kitchen table and Cordelia. Without hesitation he grabbed her arms and forced her to look into his face. At first she started to panic and a scream started to come from her throat. She tried in vain to push Angel away. But he held onto her tightly.
Dr. Thompson started to go to them but Hunter stopped him. Out of the corner of her eye Hunter saw Giles start to go to Mary's aid but with her vampire speed she was able to stop Giles also. He fought her for a second. "Giles stop it. This is the way Angel has to do it. You can see how she is fighting him. You will hear him say something also that you won't like but it will be how he will test her to see if he has enough control over her yet." Hunter whispered to Giles as she held onto him.
Angel had both of his arms around Dr. Martin, he grabbed her hair at the back of her head. He saw the look of panic in her eyes, her heart was beating a mile a minute and he could smell the fear rolling off of her in waves. Even though he was forcing her head towards him her eyes were looking everywhere else but at him. Her eyes were open wide and she looked like a rabbit that has been caught in a trap.
"Look at me Mary. Look at my eyes, look deeply into them. Do you see your reflection Mary, look deeply. If you look carefully, you'll be able to see yourself." As she looked into his eyes she started to calm down. Angel continued to hold her closely against his own body. "I want you Mary, I want to make love to you." Angel started to move his hands all over her body. "You want me don't you?" In a dream like state Dr. Martin answered him. "Yes I want you." Dr. Martin put her hands up to Angels face and started to kiss him passionately. Angels' kisses traveled down to her neck and as he did this his face changed and he put his fangs into her neck and began to drink from her.
Cordelia came over to them and put her hand on his arm gently and spoke his name. "Angel your losing control." Angel withdrew his teeth from Mary's neck and looked at Cordelia. He blinked his eyes several times as though he was trying to clear his mind. She saw Dr. Martins blood around his mouth and on his teeth. Angel returned his attention back to Dr. Martins neck and carefully licked the blood away. He blinked several times and looked at Cordelia again. She took a Kleenex and wiped his mouth for him. He turned his attention back to Dr. Martin then. "Lets go over to the couch Mary where we can be more comfortable." Angel guided her to the couch and she followed him without hesitation.
"Mary I want you to stay here until I come back for you. This is Hunter, she is going to keep you company until I get back. You are not to talk to anyone but Hunter, I want you to do whatever she tells you to do you understand?" "Yes Angel I understand. You won't be gone long will you? No I won't be gone long." Angel got up then and went over to the furthest dark corner that he could find and sank to the floor.
Cordelia went over to him. "I'm going to leave now Angel. Are you going to be alright?" He didn't say anything he just nodded. Cordelia gave him a kiss on his forehead then stood up and left.
Hunter sat on the coffee table across from Dr. Martin. Hunter and Dr. Martin had talked extensively about what kind of questions she would ask her and how she was to proceed. The session took almost two hours because of Hunters inexperience. She was having a problem getting Dr. Martin to talk about the demons that were raping her. Ninety minutes into the session she finally was able to get to the reason for the problem she was having. When she had what she needed Hunter carefully started to bring Dr. Martin back to the present time. When she opened her eyes she was back at the present time but still in the dream state that Angel had put her in.
"Angel she isn't coming out of the hypnotic state that you put her in. I think your going to have to bring her out of it." Hunter told him.
Angel stood up from his corner of the room. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hands and took a moment to compose himself and put himself in the right frame of mind in order to do what was needed. He walked over and sat next to Dr. Martin. He picked up her hand and gently kissed it. "I'm back, did you miss me?" "Yes I did." She kissed him then he put his mouth to her ear and whispered something in it. He stood up then and picked her up in his arms and took her to the bed. He pulled her shoes off then pulled the blanket that was at the end of the bed and covered her with it. He went to the other side of the bed and took his shoes off and laid down beside her. Angel wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck and ear. "I want you to go to sleep now Mary. You seem very tired. Why don't you close your eyes now?" "You'll still be here when I wake up won't you?" "Yes I'll still be here with my arms around you and protecting you, go to sleep now, when you wake up everything will be okay and you'll feel a lot better. I am going to get up for a minute and I will be right back." Angel had an idea and the idea put a big grin on his face.
Angel went over to the calender and signaled for Mike to come over.
"How long do you think it will be before Dr. Martin can have sex again?" Angel was whispering to Mike when he asked him the question. He saw the look on his face and explained why he wanted to know. When he was done telling him why Mike had a big grin on his face also. He looked at the calender and lifted it to the next month and pointed to the date. He returned to the bed again and laid down next to Dr. Martin. He whispered something into her ear again then kissed her. Dr. Martin smiled then went to sleep. Angel waited until he could hear her breathing and heart rate slow down. He got up then and walked over to Giles.
"She's going to sleep for a long time now. Probably until tonight. She should wake up her old self again. She won't remember anything that happened between her and I right away. Later on perhaps weeks or months down the line she will slowly remember bits and pieces of it. By then I hope that she will be able to forgive me. Go and lay down beside her Giles just as you saw me do. You need to replace me in her mind."
Giles shook Angels hand and pulled him into his arms and hugged him. "I know how hard this was for you Angel and I can't thank you enough." Angel pulled away from him and said 'no Giles you can never know how hard it was on me. The only person that could possibly have an idea as to how hard it was for me is Spike.' Angel opened the door and left. As he exited the room he saw Spike and Buffy still standing outside in the hallway. Angel walked over to Spike. "I understand now how you felt when you had to deal with your mother." Angel turned away then to return to his room. Buffy went to Spike when she saw the sadness in his eyes. She took his hand then and lead him away and back to their room.
When Angel opened the door to his and Cordy's room he saw her sitting on the couch and feeding Kathleen. He came and sat down beside her for awhile. The 5 o'clock news was on and they were reporting the capture of several men that had robbed a woman the week before as she was getting money from an ATM machine. Instead of just leaving her after taking all of her money they kidnaped her also. They next day two teenage boys had found her body in the back of the mall while riding their skate boards. The autopsy had shown that she had been raped then murdered.
Angel jumped up then, he couldn't stand to sit there anymore. "I'm going downstairs to work out if anyone is looking for me." "Okay Angel." Cordy said. She was worried about him. He hadn't said anything to her about what happened with Dr. Martin. Angel changed into his sweat pants and a T-Shirt and went down stairs. He spent the next 3 hours exercising until he was exhausted and couldn't do one more push up. His arms felt as though they were going to fall off when he finally collapsed on the floor. After his breathing had returned to normal he stood up and went up to his room. As he passed the kitchen he saw Fred starting supper. He was glad that she didn't see him. He didn't feel like talking to anyone.
When Angel entered his room he saw Cordelia sleeping on the bed with Kathleen next to her. He went into the bathroom and removed his clothes and entered the shower. He thought he would take a few minutes to just let the water run over his sore muscles. As he stood there he started thinking about this morning and what he had done to Dr. Martin. He finally broke down and sat on the floor of the shower and started to cry. He started to hit the wall of the shower with his fist. He hated himself for what he did.
Cordelia knocked on the door of the bathroom but Angel didn't respond. She opened the door. The room was filled with steam so she turned the fan on that would take it out of the room and to the top of the building where it would be let out. She heard him crying, she removed her clothes and stepped into the shower. The water was too hot for her so she turned the hot water faucet down.
Angel was on the floor with his legs under him and he was leaning against the wall. Cordelia sat down by him and touched his shoulder. "Why are you crying Angel? You only did what she asked of you. Why are you punishing yourself like this?"
Without looking at her he answered. "I hate myself Cordy. I'm not angry with Mom. I hate myself because after all that I have gone through, after fighting the good fight, after suffering so much Cordy it all came down to the fact that I am a Vampire and I was only able to help her because I am a Vampire. I feel so ugly and dirty, I feel like a monster that deserves nothing but the eternal flames of Hell." Cordelia put her arms around him. She let him cry until he couldn't cry anymore and when he finally stopped she told him to stand up started to wash him. When she was done with him she bathed herself then turned the water off. Angel didn't react to her in anyway other then to do exactly as she said. She could see that he was exhausted from all that had taken place that day.
Cordelia gave him some shorts and a clean T-Shirt to put on then she told him to lay down and take a nap with her and Kathleen. "When you wake up in an hour or two you'll feel a lot better then after dinner we will sit down and have a long talk. Okay?" "Yes Cordelia."
They all slept for the next two hours and as Cordelia had said Angel woke up in a much better frame of mind.
"How are you feeling Angel?" "You were right I feel much better after that nap. Haven't you noticed Cordy that I have a hard time dealing with things when I am more or less forced to get up to early. People tend to forget that my normal sleep time is during the day."
"It's easy for me to forget since we get up late so often. Ever since Kathleen was born though I've noticed how she doesn't sleep for very long during the night. She is so attuned to you Angel that she doesn't sleep very well until very late at night, and if she does sleep she wakes up frequently."
"You know I look at her sometimes and I marvel at the thought that I helped to make this tiny human being. I have to tell you something that I just found out myself recently." Cordelia sat up and gave him her full attention.
"When Richard was here I finally found out who he is. Cordelia, Richards is my son. Wesley is the one that finally figured it out. He said he figured it out by watching Richards. He said he walks and talks just like Connor and I do. His mother was a woman that I stayed with a long time ago when I first arrived here in California. I had no idea that she was pregnant when I left. Back then, as far as I knew, my boys were dead and dried up. I offered to announce to everyone who he was but he said that he would rather that I didn't. He said that he would prefer that we keep it just in the family."
"Well I guess that's what happens when a young beautiful woman such as myself has older men come sniffing around her. She can often end up with step children that are much older than she is." Angel just looked at her. "As I recall young lady you were the one that tried to pull me into your boat with a net." "I did not." "You most certainly did. Don't you remember that you were scared about some monster or demon or something or other so you latched onto my arm and were hanging all over me. 'Oh Angel I am so afraid to go home by myself would you take me home please.' Then you just batted your eyes at me and gave Buffy a dirty look." Angel tried to imitate her. Cordelia started laughing as he knelt on the bed and pretended he was holding onto someone's arm and he looked up at the ceiling and batted his eyelashes. She finally stopped long enough to put Kathleen in her bassinet.
"Well I have you now mister." Cordelia stood up on the bed and made like Tarzan's Jane. She beat her chest and said, 'Me Jane, you Tarzan. Tarzan stray far from home and Jane will kill Chetah. Tarzan mine.' Then she beat her chest again and gave a Tarzan yell. Angel had fallen on the floor he was laughing so hard.
When they finally were able to stop laughing Angel was sitting on the floor and leaning against the bed. "I needed that. I took what happened this morning too seriously. I did what I had to do to help Mom. We were lucky that I was able to do that. I don't know what she would have done if I hadn't been able to hypnotize her. Did I tell you why she was afraid of Spike and I?"
"No you didn't say anything about it."
"One of the guards was able to change his appearance so when it came to his turn at her he changed so that he looked like me then later after a few other guards had their turn he changed his appearance so that he looked like Spike. She said he thought the whole thing was pretty funny and laughed when he was done." Angel was quiet for a moment then he jumped up and started to get dressed. "Let's go down stairs. I could drink a horse I'm so hungry."
Cordelia got dressed and then took care of Kathleen. They came down the stairs with Angel holding his daughter. Everyone else was already sitting down at the table and waiting for the food to be served. To his surprise Dr. Martin and Giles were there also.
"Well good evening everyone." Everyone answered with a good evening. Angel pulled the bassinet over to their end of the table as they walked by. Cordelia as usual went to the kitchen to warm up some blood for Angel. To her surprise Dr. Martin had followed her in.
"Cordelia, let me warm it up for him." "Okay, thank you. How are you feeling this evening?"
"A lot better, thank you for asking. I wanted to let you know that Hunter told me what happened when Angel hypnotized me. We also talked a little bit about what I said happened when I was raped. I now know why I couldn't stand to have Angel or Spike around me. She also told me how hard it was for Angel. I wanted to take his blood into him so that I could let him know that everything was okay now."
Cordelia hugged her and gave her a kiss on her cheek. When she pulled away they both had tears, which they wiped away. "Angel did take it very hard. But what bothered him more was that with all that he has been dealing with and learning about how to deal with him being a Vampire it all came down to the fact that if he hadn't been a Vampire he wouldn't have been able to help you. After I made him take a nap with Kathleen and I he felt a lot better. We played a little and afterward he was on the floor and leaning against the bed and he admitted to himself that he takes things to seriously sometimes. He seemed to have taken a big step at that moment in excepting who and what he is and how he perceives everything. He is very light hearted right now so try not to get to serious. I am hoping for some husband and wife play time tonight." Cordelia laughed as she said that.
"I'll do my best Cordy." The blood was warmed up to Angels specification now so she put the glass on a small dish and walked back to the dinning room. Angel was talking to Spike who was sitting on his left so he didn't notice who was giving him his glass of blood until Dr. Martin put her hand on his shoulder. As soon as he looked up and saw Dr. Martin standing there he stood up.
"Angel, I wanted to thank you for what you did for me. I know how hard it was for you because Hunter and I were able to talk for an hour before we came downstairs. I know now why I couldn't stand to be around you and Spike. Now that I can see what caused my problem I can except it and deal with it." Dr. Martin reached up and hugged Angel and gave him a kiss. Angel put his arms around her carefully and when she didn't pull away he picked her up as he hugged her. He whispered to her 'Welcome back Mama, welcome back.' He put her down then and she went back to her chair.
Everyone started to eat their dinner after Dr. Martin sat down. After everyone was finished eating and they were sitting around having their coffee Dr. Martin stood up and asked for everyone's attention.
"I wanted to let everyone here know how grateful I am that you have all admitted me into your family. I don't know why but you all accepted my authority over all of you without question at the beginning. You accepted my story of being sent by God Himself. You all willing worked with me to help Angel. I must say that I have never in my life seen so much love between people that are not related by blood, 'No pun intended'. You have all had to overcome monumental obstacles. Whenever I had a session with any of you, you listened with an open mind. I've given you earth shattering news and you accepted it as Gospel. I talked to Fr. Barris two days ago and I asked him if we could baptize Kathleen this coming Sunday at the earliest mass that they have which is at 6:30. Tomorrow at 8 P.M. we will go to the church and he will go through all of the instructions as to what is going to happen at the Baptism." Dr. Martin was getting tired so she sat down.
"I'm sorry guys but I am very tired right now. The last two days have been very busy for me. Angel, would you come here please?" Angel came over and pulled a chair over so that he could sit next to Dr. Martin. As he sat down next to her she picked up his hand and held it in both of hers.
"Remember the other day when I couldn't stand for you to touch me and it all ended very badly?" "Yes I remember; in fact I don't think that I will ever forget it."
"When you left I asked Hunter to give me something to make me sleep for at least 8 hours. I had been thinking about the rape over and over again as I tried to think of why I couldn't stand to have you touch me. I needed a deep sleep. Remember when I was first working with you I would give you something to make you sleep so that you would be rested enough to handle what you were having to deal with."
"Yes." Angel replied.
"I needed that kind of sleep so that my mind could rest. Well it worked pretty good for most of the time that I was sleeping. But a mutual friend of ours decided to visit me during that time. Sr. Margaret came to me in a dream. She gave me some information concerning you. I want everyone to come with me out onto the patio. Our Sr. Margaret gave me some very happy news."
Everyone got up and followed Dr. Martin out of the back door. The sun was going down but there were still pockets of sun light that made their way through the smog laden air of Los Angeles. Dr. Martin walked over to one of these pockets of light, faced Angel and put her hand out into the sun light. She pulled her hand back just slightly then she spread her fingers out.
"Put your right hand in mine Angel and interlace your fingers through mine." Angel did as she said. His hand covered hers completely and all you could see were her fingers coming through his hand.
"Try not to pull your hand back, let me direct it." Slowly she pushed his hand towards the beam of sunlight. Angel had an idea as to what she was going to do and his hand and arm started to shake, but Dr. Martin held on tightly. As she was within an inch of entering the sun light she called out to Wesley. "Wesley give me a count of every second that we have our hands in the sun light and when I withdraw our hands." "Go ahead I'm ready." Wesley said.
Dr. Martin pulled Angels hand into the beam of sunlight and as expected his hand soon began to smoke and you could smell his burning flesh. Wesley started to call out the seconds. When he reached 10 seconds she withdrew their hands. She looked at everyone then brought her attention back to Angel. She looked at his hand and put both of her hands over his. She could feel the heat coming from his flesh.
"Angel, for the next two years, or less, you are to come out here and put your hand into the sunlight for exactly 10 seconds. Sometime during the next two years, or less, you will find that your hand will no longer burn and you will be able to go into the sunlight so that Cordelia, Kathleen and you can go to the park, go to Disneyland, Knotts Berry Farm or where ever you choose. There is only one rule for you in this new freedom. You will not be able to work in the sunlight. I am sure that you know exactly what I am talking about. This is the message that Sr. Margaret gave me for you. Don't ask me when you will be able to do this because Sr. Margaret didn't tell me. Any questions other then the one that I said you couldn't ask?"
"No it is quit clear. Thank you." Angel turned to Cordelia. She gave Kathleen to Fred and turned and jumped into Angels arms. They were both crying they were so happy.
"Angel there is something else I have to tell you that won't make you to happy." Angel put Cordy down and turned to Dr. Martin.
"Everyone here has noticed, I am sure, that it is taking you a lot longer to heal and your temperature usually goes dangerously high. This problem will remain with you. You will continue to heal a lot faster then a normal human but much slower than you used to. Now the fact that you are being given as much as two years before you can go out into the sunlight means that you are slowly becoming human again. God is giving you time for your body and your mind to adjust. Your redemption is still years away Angel but I think that I can finally say that this is the beginning of the end. I am going in now and try and get some more sleep. Goodnight everyone." Dr. Martin gave Angel and Spike a kiss on the cheek and a hug then turned and went back into the hotel.
Cordelia and Angel chose to stay out in the garden for a while. Fred gave Kathleen back to Cordelia and she joined Wesley as the rest of them went back into the hotel. They sat on the wall of brick that encircled the Chinese Elm and just enjoyed watching the setting sun.
"Lets go upstairs while there is still some light." Angel said as he stretched out his hand to his wife. Cordelia stood up with Kathleen in her arms. They walked upstairs and into their rooms then to the balcony. This unusual little family sat on the balcony and watched the sky until they could no longer see the light from the setting sun. As the sky turned an orange red color Angel was reminded of the little poem that sailors used to recite.
Red sky in the morning,
Sailor take warning.
Red sky at night,
Is a sailors delight.
It was used to remind them that if the sky was a red color it meant that a storm was going away from them and it would be smooth sailing that night. If it was a red sky in the morning it meant that they had storm clouds coming their way.
Cordelia got up when it started getting cold. The Princess needed to be changed and it was starting to get to chilly for her. When she was done cleaning her she gave her to her Daddy and went downstairs to help Fred. Angel spent some quality time with his daughter until Cordelia came back upstairs. Cordelia put her daughter in the bassinet then Angel and her curled up on the couch while Cordelia read a book out loud to Angel. Angel liked hearing her read because her acting abilities would come into play and make the story more interesting. When Cordelia's voice finally give out Angel took over. It was 2 in the morning before they finally went to bed, they had become so caught up in the story they kept reading until Cordelia couldn't keep her eyes open. When Angel heard Cordelia snoring he put a ribbon in the book to mark their place then picked her up and put her to bed.
The next morning after breakfast Angel asked the men to join him in his bedroom while Cordelia stayed downstairs to meet with the women. Angel wanted to talk to the men about putting the women in danger. The men took seats around the bedroom and waited for Angel to tell them what he wanted to talk about.
"When Dr. Martin was taken and raped it made me start thinking. I asked myself should we be putting our loved ones in so much danger? The women seem to be a primary target when they want to get back at me for something or to try to get me to do what they want. Right now Cordelia, Kathleen and Dr. Martin are the only ones that are a target. It won't be long though before the rest of you, except Connor I hope, will have additions to your own immediate family. Spike, I know that you don't have to worry about Buffy but I know that you have Dawn to worry about. Willow and Tara can pretty much take care of themselves. In fact those guys have been taking care of each other long before the rest of you came along. But it won't be long before you will have your own children to think of. And when Dr. Martin is staying with Giles I'll expect you to take care of her also. My question is do we want to continue doing the work we are doing and put our loved ones in danger? Or do we even have the right to put them in danger?"
"This subject has occupied my thoughts also Angel." Wesley said.
"I noticed. I was just about to offer you a free membership to my All Famous Brooding Club." Angel said with a smile.
"Now I understand how easy it is to get into that mode of thought. I have decided that we can't make that decision for the women in our lives. They wouldn't stand for us to make that decision for them. We just don't have the right to say what they can or cannot do. We have to leave this up to them, they know that this is our life's work. Cordelia, most of all, knows the importance of what we do. She has been with you from the beginning and she wouldn't ever forgive you if you tried to make that decision for her."
"I was thinking the same thing Wesley but then every time I hold Kathleen in my hands I can't bear the thought of anything happening to her. Then I think if I choose to stop doing the work we do I would be going against Gods wishes. I also think He has given Connor, and from what Willow tells us, Kathleen everything that she will need to continue the good fight beside her brother. So I think our only choice is to leave this choice up to the women."
Connor had been holding his sister while they were talking. "It looks like she is ready to go to sleep already." Connor said.
"Go ahead and put her in the bassinet. Make sure you put her on her back and cover her with the blanket." Angel told Connor then he turned back to the rest of the men.
"Well, what do the rest of you think?" Angel asked. "I agree with Wesley Angel. We have to leave this up to the women. They are the ones who's lives are on the line." Giles said.
"Gunn and Spike do you agree with Wesley and Giles?" Angel asked.
"Yes." Gunn answered. "Spike, what about you?" Angel asked his childe.
"I am thinking how in the world did you and I ever get ourselves into this situation. I know that all that I am going through right now is a dream come true. I am getting to practice medicine and learn from a top notch surgeon and psychiatrist. I have a wife that I love so much that I can't imagine being without her and you could say that I equate her to blood. For you humans you have to understand that blood is as important to us as the very air that you breath is to you. It means everything to us, but I would give up everything that I have if it meant that I could make Buffy and Dawn safe. For the first time in all of my undead life I am having to learn to put others feelings before mine. Because of that I have to say that we have to consider the women's right to decide for themselves. Life isn't like it was 150 years ago where the men made all of the decisions and what women wanted wasn't important. These days we are partners in life."
"Okay then, lets go and talk to the women. I asked Cordelia to bring this up with the women so they should have been discussing the same thing. Let's see what they want to do. Connor would you bring your sister or do you want to stay up here with her?" "I'll bring her with me. You know Dad if we had a dog to protect her we wouldn't have to disturb her nice peaceful sleep." Angel didn't say anything and just lead them all downstairs.
Spike waited to walk with Connor after the others went out. "Don't be discouraged, keep up the comments and sooner or later he'll crack and give in." They smiled at their little plan to get Angel to give in and let Connor get a dog.
They found all of the women sitting at one end of the dinning room table by Dr. Martin so the men took the other end by Angel. Connor gave his sister to Cordelia. As usual the women all wanted to hold her so Cordelia unwrapped her from the blanket that Connor had put her in and she was passed around. When she started grabbing for the nearest breast the women finally had to give in and give her back to her Mother.
Angel cleared his throat loudly enough to get everyone's attention. "We came down here to find out if you women had discussed what I had asked Cordelia to talk to you about."
"You mean about whether we wanted you to stop helping people and killing demons and Vampires just so we could be safe and our children and future children safe?" Cordelia asked.
"Yes Cordelia." She could tell by the sound of Angels voice that he was getting irritated with her.
Cordelia got up and while carrying her daughter and feeding her she walked over to Angel. "Push your chair back so I can sit on your lap Angel." Angel did as she said and Cordelia sat down on his lap as he held on to her by putting his arm around her waist.
"You see this precious little human being that I am holding in my arms and feeding with the milk that my own body produces?" Cordelia looked at all of the men. "When we were first married and I let Angel make love to me I knew that we could be making another human being. I had consciously made the decision, when we were married, to become pregnant as soon as possible. I knew that both Angel and I wanted children so I didn't take any precautions to make sure that I didn't. With that decision came the acceptance of all of the pain and suffering that I would go through while this little bun was in the oven baking slowly. I accepted the possibility of all of the medical problems that women can have. I accepted the possibility of even my death. I accepted all of this because I knew what the final reward was. I also took all of those risks because I love Angel. When we aren't taking the risks of producing children then we fight by your side or help you in some way to do the work that you have to do and we know and accept the risks of doing that also."
Cordelia got up from Angels lap and went back to the other side and sat down again.
"Well guys I guess we have our answer." Angel said. "After listening to her it makes me feel like we men are wimps compared to them." Wesley said as he rubbed his face.
Kathleen was falling asleep now so Cordelia cleaned herself and put everything back into place. "Connor would you take her upstairs and as you go try getting her to burp. When you get that burp then you can put her to bed and if you would please sit with her until I come up?" Connor came over and took his little sister while Cordelia put a towel over his shoulder. Connor put Kathleen against his shoulder and started patting her on the back gently as he walked up the stairs and to her bedroom.
"Now that we have that question out of the way I have a question to ask you Angel and I didn't want Connor to hear it. Please don't take this in the wrong way because all I am interested in is the technical side of how you hypnotized me. I know what happened because Hunter told me when we talked this morning. What has me so curious about it also is that you did it so fast. Do you mind if we discuss this in front of everyone or would you rather that we go up to 412?"
"No I don't mind. If I don't let this come out into the open then Angelus will use it to try and drive me crazy. Let me explain what happened yesterday morning and maybe I'll answer your question at the same time. When I went upstairs to hypnotize you I knew that you would fight me if I touched you so as soon as I went in I grabbed you by putting my hands on your arms and held you close to me. I grabbed your hair at the back of your head and forced you to look at me because you were trying so hard to push me away. You were about to start screaming when I was able to force your to look into my eyes. I don't know what it is that you saw but I could tell that I had successfully hypnotized you. To test how deep the control was I started to do something that I knew you wouldn't do of your own volition."
Angel looked straight at Dr. Martin. "I told you that I wanted you and that I wanted to make love to you. You said that you wanted me, then you kissed me. Now this is where my brain started to get a little foggy. The next thing I knew was that I bit you and was drinking your blood but that is also when I felt Cordy calling to me and telling me I was losing control. By the time I finished cleaning the wound I was in full control again. I then led you over to the couch and turned control over to Hunter."
"I remember you telling me to look deeply into your eyes and that I would see my reflection. I remember looking in your eyes and I saw swirling pools of black and red. I guess that is when it happened. My next conscious thought was when I woke up in bed and Giles was holding onto me. Can all Vampires do this?"
"Most can but we all do it in different ways. The best one that I ever saw was Drusilla." Angel looked at Spike. "Did she ever tell you how she did it?" "Yeah, I asked her one time what she did to get her victims under control so fast. She said it was her fingernails. Remember how she used to spend so much time with them?" "Yeah, I guess Darla knew because she never yelled at her about spending so much time on them." Angel said. "She said she would get people to focus in on her fingernails and she would then redirect their eyes to looking into hers." Spike said.
"Well I was hoping that I could learn something from you as to how to get a patient to respond to my attempts to hypnotize them more easily. Now that my curiosity has been assuaged I have something important to tell you that you may not like." Angel stared at her for a few moments.
"Wait a minute while I get comfortable. I don't want to fall on the floor when I start to throw a fit." Angel stretched out on the couch and put his head in Cordelia's lap and his legs on Spikes lap.
"Okay you can tell me now." Angel said while he had his head turned towards Cordelia.
"Why are you looking at Cordelia instead of me?" "Because if I'm going to be given bad news then I want to be looking at my two most favorite toys." Cordelia slapped him lightly on his head. "Shame on you, now sit up and take it like a man." Angel sat up straight wearing a goofy grin. .
"Spike and Buffy are leaving on Monday. Giles and I will be going with them. Hunter will be leaving also. I need to spend some more time with her and while she is helping me I'll be helping her by giving her practical experience as a psychiatrist. I will be back in 3 months Angel. Come hell or high water I will be back in 3 months."
Angel didn't say anything for awhile. "How is Connor doing Wesley? Can he take a 3 month vacation?" Angel asked. "I can't tell you that until we get the test results back from school as to how he did on his GED tests. Once we get those we will be able to register him at UCLA. He can do that in one day."
"Check on it today okay? I want to send him to Sunnydale to help Spike and Buffy. He can stay at the mansion while he is there. Also since we men were all his age at one time we know exactly what will be on his mind so I am going to see if Richards can go to Sunnydale also and keep an eye on his little brother. Otherwise poor old Spike here will have a heart attack worrying about Dawn."
"Actually Angel we won't have to worry about that, Dawn is going to be spending the summer with her Father here in L.A.." Spike said. "If you don't mind I think Buffy and I would like to stay at your place while Connor stays at ours with Willow and Tara."
"That sounds good to me. Okay Mom you have my permission to go." Everyone looked at Dr. Martin and let out an 'Ohhhhhh, your in trouble now.'
Dr. Martin didn't say anything, she just had a big smile. They watched her though as she took out a notebook and pen from her pocket and wrote down something. As she put it back in her pocket she noticed everyone watching her. "You know how us old people have poor memories. I just wanted to make sure that I don't forget what he said." Cordelia I never got a chance to go shopping for a Baptismal gown for Kathleen, do you want to go with me today?"
"Yes that will be nice. I haven't been out of this place since I can't remember when. How about all of us girls going out. We can have lunch out and the men can stay home and babysit."
"I want you to go with them Connor. Cordelia can help you buy some clothes and you can help Buffy if there is a problem."
As Wesley followed Angel out of the office, he tapped him on the shoulder. "I'm glad we got that taken cared of Angel. The question has been keeping me awake at night. Now I can get a good nights sleep for the first time in almost a week."
"To tell you the truth Wesley, I don't think any of us men are going to get much sleep tonight." "What makes you say that, is their something else going on?"
"We have at least 3 women in this place that are putting out those enticing pheromones." "You can't tell who?" Wesley asked. "I can only say that it isn't Dr. Martin. Poor Giles is in dry dock until at least next month. Before I brought her out of the hypnotic trance I asked Mike when she would be able to have sex again. He told me around the middle of next month. So I told her that on a certain date she was going to want to have sex with Giles constantly for the 24 hours of that date. I told her she wouldn't be able to keep her hands off of him." "What did you do that for?" "Because when Mom hypnotized Cordelia after she was raped she told her the same thing. Cordelia couldn't keep her hands off of me she demanded that we have sex before we even went downstairs for breakfast. I know that, that was the day we conceived Kathleen. I thought that the day before Moms light switch is to be turned on that I would send Giles a couple dozen Oysters. I'll put a note in them that says 'Eat these tonight, you'll need them for tomorrow. A gift from your future step son.'
"I wish I could see the look on his face when he gets them." Wesley said as he laughed. To think of Giles being in that situation was to good to let pass. "Well I was planning on going to Sunnydale that day. Just to check up on Connor of course." "You dog, count me in." Wesley said. They went up to their rooms then laughing all the way. As he went into his bedroom Wesley soon found out that Fred was one of those women that was sending out those pheromones.
TBC...The next chapter will be the last until my next book.