A parody of Inuyasha, Spider-Man, Batman, and Superman.
Chapter 2: Pandemonium
"Ah!" squawked Toad-Boy. "What's going on down there?" He tottered to the cliff and peered over the edge. "My goodness—what on earth is that thing?"
The "thing" was some kind of monster, raising itself on eight huge tentacles that were merged onto the body of a young man with rippling black hair. Even from the heights of the cliff, Fluffy-Man's keen eyesight allowed him to see the handsomeness of the young man's face, and also the corruption brewing in his red eyes. He cackled like a maniac, hair whipping, using his tentacles to knock down houses and crush innocent villagers.
Rin woke up. "What's all that noise, Lord Sesshoumaru?"
"Did you forget again that you must never address Fluffy-Man by his real name when he's in his costume?" reprimanded Toad-Boy.
"Oops. Sorry, Lord Jaken."
"That applies to me as well!"
"Rin. Stay here." Fluffy-Man did not turn to look at his young charge. "It is time."
His faithful Fluffysteed understood the signal, and trotted over to him submissively. Fluffy-Man mounted it. A moment later, the steed was soaring down towards the village, proudly bearing its rider, with all the grace of an eagle.
Toad-Boy turned to Rin. "Rin…you heard our lord. Stay here; you'll be safe."
Rin flung her arms around Toad-Boy. "You do care!" she cooed.
"Hmph," grunted Toad-Boy gruffly. "I must be off. I shall assist Fluffy-Man in his glorious escapades no matter what the consequences. Good-bye, Rin."
He turned towards the cliff dramatically. But then he paused. "Uh…how am I going to get down from here?"
- - -
The village was in an uproar. Men ran in all directions, trying to provide safety for their loved ones. Mothers cried and screamed and held their children in their arms, determined to protect them at all costs. Farm animals ran amok among the corpses littered everywhere among the ruins of the houses.
In the midst of it all, the tentacled monster grinned and cackled. "Ha ha ha! This is fun! This is what I was born to do!" He reached out a hind tentacle and knocked a young girl against a wall.
A man leading his wife by the arm towards the nearby forest suddenly stopped and looked up. His wife yelled, "Don't stop! Come on, Takehiro! Move!"
But he could only point a finger up at the sky in apparent bewilderment. "Look at that. Is it a bird? No. Is it a plane? Not likely. Wait…could it be…oh my lord, yes. Yes, it is!" His face split in a wide, joyful grin. "We're saved! Everyone, we're saved! It's Fluffy-Man!"
The commotion came to a sudden, blood-chilling halt. All faces turned upwards, except for that of the monster, who was busy dunking a boy in a barrel of water. But even he, eventually, noticed the lack of chaos, and saw that everyone was looking up. He looked up too—and regretted it, for the dragonsteed shot a laser ray at him and frizzled his face.
"Ack!" he cried in dismay. "My face, my lovely face!"
"Your face is not nearly as lovely as mine," came a deep, masculine voice from above.
The monster looked up angrily. The silver-haired man did appear, from what could be seen of his face, quite good-looking. The monster did not like the fact that this individual, with his cool-looking cape and sexy tight clothes, attracted more attention than he did. "Who—who're you?" he asked.
"Me? Don't you know my name? Everyone does," the rider said smoothly. "I'm the invincible superhero Fluffy-Man, the Executioner of Evil, the Keeper of Justice, the—"
"All right, all right already," growled the monster. "You don't need to show off; I'm just as famous as you are. Surely you have heard my name." There was a dramatic pause. "The Octopus."
He waited smugly for some sign of recognition, but was met by silence. Very much annoyed, he finally snarled, "All right, just call me Dr. Naraku."
"Now that name I have heard before," Fluffy-Man noted. "Aren't you that freak scientist who gave birth to six babies?"
Dr. Naraku grew red. "Shut up. I didn't give birth to them, they just—came out of me. Kanna was the first. Then Kagura, and—and—"
"I never heard that you grew tentacles too."
"That's because I only just grew them this morning," Dr. Naraku declared proudly, stroking one tentacle. "They, my charming children, are the results of an experiment in fusing pro-nuclear particles with negatively charged antimatter—an experiment that went horribly wrong."
"How pleasant," remarked Fluffy-Man. "Well, I've heard all I need to know. Now, prepare to die."
"So you want to fight, huh?" cackled Dr. Naraku. "Then let's get started."
The monster lashed a wriggling tentacle towards Fluffy-Man, intending to knock him off his steed, but they split apart and dodged the attack. Cursing, Dr. Naraku now realized that there were two separate entities to fight off, both of which could fly. Well, he would just have to use his tentacles to the best possible advantage.
From his aerial view, Fluffy-Man decided that this shouldn't be too difficult. It was at that moment that his sidekick, Toad-Boy, chose to show up. "Fluffy-Man!" he screeched. "Your faithful sidekick is here! I apologize for being late, I had to climb down the side of the cliff—"
"Toad-Boy, get on the Fluffysteed," ordered Fluffy-Man.
"Oh—of course—yes, my lord!"
In a flash of lightning speed, Fluffy-Man dived at Dr. Naraku and lashed his energy whip at one of the tentacles, severing it.
Dr. Naraku let out a cry of pain, but it turned into laughter. "You can't get me that easily, Fluffers!"
Fluffers? Annoyed, Fluffy-Man watched as the severed tentacle re-grew itself. He drew his sword, Toukijin, and aimed it towards the body of Dr. Naraku. If he got the man in the heart, then that should kill him, tentacles and all.
But the sword never reached its target. A tentacle suddenly came out of nowhere and knocked Toukijin right out of Fluffy-Man's hand. Only his superior demon senses allowed him to dodge in time and avoid being struck.
Toad-Boy fought from the Fluffysteed's back, veins popping and eyes bulging. He continuously uttered hoarse war cries, apparently the ones he used when leading his army of little green demons to war. Without a better technique or a weapon more suited for him, Toad-Boy could only fling around the Staff of Heads and shoot fire. All he really did was singe the tentacles, but he did burn off a good deal of Dr. Naraku's hair.
"What do you want, anyway?" demanded Fluffy-Man, slicing four tentacles at once, using a tornado technique. They grew back within a few seconds.
"I want what everyone wants," the monster gargled happily. "The Shikon no Tama, Jewel of Four Souls."
He lashed two tentacles at Fluffy-Man, one from the front and one from the back, hoping to catch him off guard. But his hopes were dashed as Fluffy-Man dodged both.
"I need the jewel so that I can become bigger and more powerful. Then I will be able to aim for world domination!"
"The jewel is not here, so what have you come for?" Fluffy-Man obliterated yet another tentacle, getting annoyed as he watched it regenerate.
"My tentacles can feel the power of the jewel," Dr. Naraku explained, whipping aside Toad-Boy and the dragonsteed and dodging Fluffy-Man's attack. "They are aware of where it goes. My tentacles tell me that the jewel passed through this village, and that we are hot on its trail."
"They talk to you? Disgusting."
"Don't mock me, vermin!"
As they fought, Fluffy-Man thought things over. This Dr. Naraku sought the Shikon no Tama. It was currently with Inuyasha and his wench, and their little friends. Although the jewel was whole again, Inuyasha had never used it as he intended. Things could get interesting.
"You fool," said Fluffy-Man, severely injuring Dr. Naraku on the side of his body. "You cannot win against me."
The scientist's face twisted in a scowl of pain, but he chuckled agonizingly. "I may not be able to defeat you, but I can run from you."
With that, he turned and scuttled away. Just like that.
I'll let you off this time, thought Fluffy-Man, because I'm interested in how this could turn out. I can always just kill you later.
His Fluffysteed landed not far from him, Toad-boy tottering and swaying dizzily. Fluffy-Man was about to get on when a swarm of fangirls all started screaming simultaneously and tried to mob him. Much as the Sesshoumaru in him would have liked to dispose of them, that would violate Fluffy-Man's philosophy. So he simply avoided them by flying up and away, towards the cliff, where they couldn't follow him.
A croaky voice emerged from the girls' disappointed wails. "My lord! Don't leave me with them!"