Disclaimer: "Harry Potter and the (Philosopher's Stone; Chamber of Secrets; Prisoner of Azaban; Goblet of Fire)" are not mine. Otherwise, my name would be J.K. Rowling, and Hermione would feature a more prominent role as someone other than "just a bookworm." wink No offense intended, I love Hermione in the canon stories so far. So don't sue me for that either! Further disclaimers will be made at the end of the chapter. So let us begin.
Hermione held Draco until his shoulders stopped shaking. How did I ever think Draco was a bad guy? Sure, he has his faults, but so did Harry, and Ron… Expertly, she cut off her train of thought. Instead, she simply sat there, holding Draco for what seemed like forever. It really wasn't that long, as the moon was still high over the ocean when he pulled away.
It came without warning – Draco's pulling away from her. Suddenly, he was leaning back, wiping at his eyes. "I – I'm sorry. Oh gods… How could I do that? Especially in front of someone who…" He stopped suddenly, looking up at her. What was he going to say that would make him stop so suddenly? She wondered. Suddenly, it hit her. Of course… What else could it have been? She looked at the sight in front of her, debating whether or not her conclusion was correct. Draco still sat in front of her. His eyes were wide and tears were still gleaming on his face. She looked into his eyes, searching… Please let me find my answer there. Under normal circumstances, she would have compared him to a moon sprite, with his pale skin and light hair. However, all her charitable thoughts were gone. All because of one unfinished statement.
Should I finish the statement? She wondered. Her solace had not appeared in his eyes. Can I finish the statement? She took a deep breath. "Especially in front of someone who is a mudblood." She stated in a monotone voice, standing up at the same time. "That's what you were going to say, wasn't it Malfoy?" She spat his last name, wanting to get a 'bit of her own' back from him. She wasn't even sorry when she saw him wince. She wanted to return to a time when him calling her a mudblood wouldn't have hurt so much, because it was only to be expected. She longed to go back to a time when she wouldn't feel so very vulnerable in front of him, because it would mean that she wasn't the fool she suddenly felt that she had become. When he didn't reply right away, she turned away, a tear running down her cheek. How could I have ever thought… how was I so wrong? I thought he had changed…
"Hermione, please. I didn't mean that. That's not what I was going to say. You have to believe me." He begged behind her.
She quickly swiped at her eyes. Stop crying. All you ever do anymore is cry. And he's not worth your tears. "Why should I believe you? After all you've done to me in the past… I blew up at Ron earlier because he expected me to roll over and be walked on. Well, I'm not someone to be walked all over, Malfoy. I'm not someone who is going to open myself up to you anymore. I can't afford to spend my time with people like Ron and you, who can't get past their own prejudices…" She turned back to look deep into his eyes. "I lost my best friend because I trusted you." She laughed bitterly. "How could I have been so stupid?"
"Hermione…" He grabbed her hand in his two. She stood facing him, staring into his gray eyes. Eyes that looked sad, astonished, and even – hurt?
She snapped out of her study of the emotion in his eyes, and attempted to retrieve her hand from his. However, he was a lot stronger than she, and wouldn't release it willingly. "Malfoy, let go of my hand." She demanded, not looking him in the eyes. Strangely, this time she felt a twinge of pain in her heart as she said his last name.
"No." She glanced up at him, shocked. What did he just say? "Not until you say my name."
She exhaled noisily in exasperation. "I did. Malfoy."
"Hermione…" He paused for a second; then added. "Not that name."
When he said that, something inside her compelled her to look back into his tumultuous gray orbs. "Draco." She whispered. She felt the tears threatening to fall from her eyes again, but she held them back. Don't let him see you cry. He's already seen too much. You need to run. You need to leave. Her mind insisted, repeating over and over. You can't stay here.
He let go of her hand slowly, never taking his eyes off her. After what seemed like only a moment – yet forever – to her, he closed his eyes and sighed. With that simple gesture, all ideas of flight left her head. So, instead of fleeing the scene, as she had intended, she simply stood there.
"Hermione, you have to believe me. I wasn't about to say 'Especially in front of someone who is a mu-" He paused; then tried again, "Mu-" Once more he tried. "Mu… It wasn't that word, Hermione."
"Then what were you going to say, Draco? Tell me, I'm dying to know." She said sarcastically. It's all a lie. Why he's lying, I don't know, but it has to be a lie.
He stared down at his feet. "I can't tell you that right now."
"Oh, is this another one of those, "Sorry, 'Mione, but it's for your own good that I don't tell you this now" things?" she snapped. "Draco, I'm tired of being left in the dark."
"Oh how I wish I could tell you, but I can't. Trust me on this. Please."
She sighed, and immediately regretted it. And now I can't stop sighing either. Honestly, whatever happened to Hermione Granger, and who is this romance novel heroine who replaced her? Mental note to self: Stop sighing. Second mental note: never call self a romance novel heroine ever again. Shoving the random thoughts to the side of her mind, she said, "Draco… I want to trust you but I don't think I can."
He looked up, shock written on his face. Then, he nodded slowly. " 'Mione, honey. You're emotionally exhausted. It's too much to deal with at once. First the Ball, then dealing with Ron, and now fighting with me…" He looked at her beseechingly. "Just come to my flat and get some rest. Then decide what you are going to do."
His voice is so persuasive, and those puppy dog eyes… who can resist them? Why not give in? It's definitely true that I need the rest… "Okay." She said softly, giving in to her inner voice for once.
He wasted no time. Instantly, he gathered her into his arms and apparated them to his flat
Normally, this would upset Hermione, but she shrugged it off. He probably figured – rightly so, of course – that I would be too drained to apparate myself to his flat. So why argue about it now?
She had originally assumed that they would be going to the manor, but when she opened her eyes, she recognized the area they were in. Surely the Malfoy Manor isn't in Richmond-upon-the-Thames? She blinked, wanting to make sure she wasn't making a mistake. No, there's the house that Anna-May used to live in, and there's Mr. Steely's baker shop, and around the corner should be…
Suddenly, she glanced up at the door they were standing in front of. It couldn't be… could it? For they were standing in front of her childhood home, where she had spent the summers between years at Hogwarts. So many things happened here…So many happy things… It had been sold when her parents died, but she had never learned who now owned it. "Do you live here?" she asked, uncertain whether she wanted Draco to say yes or no.
He looked at her oddly. "Of course, silly. Why?"
She eyes traced the doorway, noting the scratches in the doorway. Her hand reached out and traced the letters carved into the wood oh-so-many years ago. "R.W., H.P. and H.G. Forever Friends." She said aloud. Looking up at Draco's puzzled face, she added. "I placed that there the summer after 1st year. After Harry survived his first encounter with Voldemort." Realization dawned in Draco's dove-gray eyes as he looked down at her. She raised her hand, and pointed to a window above. "That room was my bedroom, and when Harry came to live with us during the summer between fifth and sixth year, he lived in that room." She pointed to a second window.
"I'm sorry. I had no idea. Would you like me to take you to another place?" He asked, worried.
"No, I'm fine." She smiled. "Richmond proper is a most agreeable little place, or so I've always thought. It wasn't a bad place to grow up. I always loved the slightly chaotic street layout. As a kid, I'd spend days finding new and exciting hidden corners." She shook her head fondly at the memories. "I'd like to stay – if it's okay with you."
"Of course." He replied.
Well, what else could he say, Hermione? She chided herself. Still – her heart did skip a beat.
They entered the flat, and Hermione unconsciously headed towards her – former – room. As she opened the door, she was pleasantly surprised. Most of her old furniture still remained in the room. A light blue canopy bed stood in one corner, while the matching dresser stood in the other. A new chair had been added, but that was really all that was different.
She turned to find Draco standing behind her. "Do you mind?" He asked nervously. "Or would you rather sleep in my room?"
"No. It's rather nice. I loved the bed as a child. It made me feel like a princess." She smiled, picturing herself as a child on the bed. "But why didn't you change it?"
He shrugged. "I liked its design. So does my mother, when she visits. I didn't need a third room, so I left it alone."
"Thanks for the compliment."
"No problem. Go ahead and use whatever's in the dresser. It's my mother's stuff so don't worry. She won't mind. I'm going to see if there's anything to eat."
He turned and padded out of the room. Hermione moved slowly over to the dresser, and pulled out a lacy light blue nightgown. His mother must love light blue also. By the time Draco came back, she had climbed into bed.
"Nothing in the pantry. Sorry. I'll pick some stuff up tomorrow." He sat in the chair.
"No problem. I'm rather tired anyway." She replied.
"Well then, I'll leave you alone. Good night, Hermione."
She turned onto her side, facing a now-standing Draco. "No, please, don't go." At his startled look, she added, "Stay until I'm asleep."
He nodded slowly, sinking back into the chair. She smiled again, and closed her eyes. "Promise me that you won't leave until I'm asleep." She murmured.
"I promise I won't leave you, Hermione. I won't ever leave you."
A dreamy smile slide over her face as she turned back over. "That's a song, you know. Well, close enough to a song…"
She didn't think Draco had heard her for a second. And even if he had, he wouldn't know the song you're talking about, Hermione. She scolded herself. Then, as she gave herself over to Mr. Sandman, she heard Draco begin to sing…
"If ever I would leave you it wouldn't be in summer.
Seeing you in summer, I never could go.
Your hair streaked with sunlight, your lips red as flame,
Your face with a luster that puts gold to shame.
But if I'd ever leave you, it couldn't be in autumn.
How I'd leave in autumn, I never will know.
I've seen how you sparkle when fall nips the air
I know you in autumn, and I must be there
And could I leave you running merrily through the snow?
Or on a wintry evening when you catch the fire's glow?
If ever I would leave you, how could it be in springtime?
Knowing how in spring I'm bewitched by you so?
Oh no not in springtime, summer, winter or fall;
No, never could I leave you at all."
A/N:
Further disclaimer: The song Draco sings in this chapter is "If Ever I Would Leave You" from the musical "Camelot." (And, for trivia people, Richard Harris [Dumbledore in the first two movies] played King Arthur in the movie version of "Camelot." Coincidence? I think not. grin May he rest in peace.)
Shout outs:
Phailin: Complications arose before I could publish this chapter. My beta-readers had more corrections than normal for me. smile Hope this helps. Next chapter SHOULD be out much sooner.
Siognee: Glad you're still loving the story. That means I'm doing my job. Ginny will be back in the story soon, I promise. What do you think of Draco in this chapter? I'm trying not to give away too much, but let me know what you think!
Mistri: Glad you like the imagery. I love nature, and trying to get it right in a story is always frustrating… Maybe I'm doing an okay job after all! smile
crazy-chica: Do you still like Draco? He's an interesting character to write… So vague in the canon books, which leaves almost TOO much open for opinion… shrug With regards to what we were discussing about in the Shout out section of Chapter 21… are you and that person still friends? Just wondering, you don't have to answer it.
Laura-Grace: I hope your computer isn't still acting up. That always sucks.
enoimreH: Do the changes work out okay? I didn't hear back from you on them, and wanted to publish this… let me know, okay? And never fear, I'm always on the look out for falling leaves. smile
PLEASE REVIEW!!!!