Author's notes: Guess who's back...back again...I am back...tell a friend...yesss...Eminem is pretty cool. Well, this isn't a new chapter-I re-wrote chapter seven. I guess I was in a strange mood because the songs didn't really match with the people. I love those songs nearly and dearly, but I just didn't like the chapter. I guess you guys didn't either because I got like three reviews. I kept the opening thought, because I liked that part.
The New (and improved!) Chapter 7:
"Hey, Mom?"
" Yes, Jose?"
"Magnet."
" Jose."
"Fine, whatever. You said there's no such thing as a stupid question, right?"
"That's correct, Jose."
"Magnet."
"It says Jose on your birth certificate, so-"
"Yeah, yeah yeah. Well, you said there's no such thing as a stupid question. So which really came first: the chicken, or the egg?"
Mr. Pendanski stuttered. "Well...um, uh-"
"Yeah," Armpit broke in. "And if a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it really make a sound?"
"Well, um-"
"Any why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?" Squid added.
"Uhh-"
"How come round pizzas are sold in square boxes?" X-Ray asked, smiling.
"You see-"
"Why is it that when an adult has multiple personalities, they're schizophrenic, but when a kid has imaginary friends they're cute?" Zigzag questioned.
"How come, 364 days a year, parents tell children not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween it's encouraged?"
"If you're name was Mr. Crunch and you joined the navy, could you eventually be called Captain Crunch?"
"Why do people call it an ATM machine, if they're really saying Automated Teller Machine Machine?"
"If CD's were played in the opposite direction, would they play backwards?"
Mr. Pendanski was stuttering. "Well, um, really-"
Stanley smiled. "Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical questions?"
"All right boys, I think that's enough. Go out and dig your holes," Mr. Pendanski said. The boys laughed and walked to their holes.
It was an aggressively hot day. Lunch had stopped by an hour ago, and the boys were hard at work. The air was quiet, except for the clacking and scraping of shovels against dirt and rocks. It was almost peaceful, Stanley thought.
Almost.
"Ow!" ZigZag screamed, smashing the silence with a brick of self-control (A/N-tell me what song that's from and I'll give you a cookie!).
"What happened?" Armpit asked.
"I stabbed my foot with the shovel. Owwww, it hurts," ZigZag hissed.
Everyone scrambled to get a look. Blood was slowly creeping through ZigZag's shoe, turning the dusty, once-white shoe red. Stanley gagged. He hated the sight of other peoples blood...hated it.
"Here," Magnet commanded. "Put your foot up." ZigZag propped his foot on a nearby rock. "Lie down." Magnet instructed. ZigZag obeyed.
Magnet gingerly took of ZigZag's shoe. He ripped a small strip of orange from the pant of his jumpsuit. Carefully, he wrapped it around the gash in ZigZag's foot. It bled through a little, but then died down until there was just a spot of dark red on the orange.
"Thanks," ZigZag said, surprised. He had never known Magnet could wrap people's wounds. Apparently, neither did anyone else.
"Hey Magnet, I didn't know you could wrap other people's wounds," Squid said.
Magnet shrugged. "It happened to my dog. I guess I've still got the touch."
"Your dog dropped a shovel on his foot?" X-Ray joked.
"No," Magnet scoffed. "He stepped on a piece of glass." Stanley's guts lurched inside of him. "I wrapped his foot like that to fix it. I figured, if I could do it on a dog with ADHD, I could do it on a human."
Everyone laughed except Magnet. His face turned paler, and he almost looked like he was going to cry.
"Magnet?" Stanley asked.
"Look," he said quickly. "I don't like talking about him. He...he had to be taken away. He was like...my only friend. I don't like thinking about him." He fished around in his pockets for a minute, and then pulled out a mint.
"I don't the feeling of not being with him, okay?" Magnet asked somewhat angrily, even though nobody had asked. "I-"
Empty
Spaces
Fill me up with holes
Distant
Faces
With no place left to go
Without you
Within me
I can't find no rest
Where I'm
Going
Is anybody's guess
"Oh my God," Armpit groaned. "More singing?" Magnet didn't seem to notice.
I try
To go on like I never knew you
I'm awake
But my world is half asleep
I pray
For this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is...
Incomplete
"You okay?" X-Ray asked tentatively. The last thing they needed was for Magnet to start crying.
Voices
Tell me
I should carry on
But I am
Swimming
In an ocean all alone
Baby, my baby
It's written on your face
You still
Wonder
If we made a big mistake
Squid rolled his eyes subtlety. Sure, it was one thing to love your pets, but this was being a bit carried away. Of course, he wasn't exactly the one to talk to-he never had a pet.
I try
To go on like I never knew you
I'm awake
But my world is half asleep
I pray
For this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is...
Incomplete
I don't mean to drag it on
But I can't seem to let you go
I don't wanna make you face this world alone...
I wanna let you go
I try
to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake
but my world is half asleep
I pray
for this heart to be unbroken
but without you all I'm going to be is...
Incomplete
Incomplete
When Magnet was done, everyone stood around silently, shuffling their feet. No one said anything. All of a sudden Magnet spoke.
"Do me a favor?" he said. Everyone nodded.
"If I ever do that again, slap me," he said, a smile spreading across his face.
"Gladly," Squid said, and everyone resumed their digging.
X-Ray sat on the rec room couch. He was about as comfortable as you can get on that beat up couch. It was a typical Camp Green Lake day. Squid was playing pool and trying to hustle shower tokens. Armpit came to play, but Squid didn't want to hustle shower tokens from Armpit. He needed them the most.
ZigZag was sitting in front of X-Ray on the floor, "watching" the TV. No one, not even Easy said anything to him.
Magnet was playing bottle pin bowling in the corner. Stanley snuck up discretely with a letter, kissed it, and stuck it in the mailbox. He went over to the corner near Zero. The two talked quietly.
Yep. It was average, everyday, normal. Nothing new. Same old, same old.
X-Ray was insanely bored. Normally, he would have joined Magnet at bowling or played pool. Maybe someone would be fighting and X-Ray would be the peacemaker. However, today, he just didn't feel like it.
Yes, there was no denying it. He was bored senseless. If there were a medal for boredom, he'd win it in a flash. At Camp Green Lake, boredom was extreme boredom. At home, he could at least watch TV or call a friend. Out here, there was nothing.
Silently, X-Ray ate a mint. Then the bass came in-dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.
I sit around and watch the tube but nothing's on
I change the channels for an hour or two
Twiddle my thumbs just for a bit
I'm sick of all the same old shit
In a house with unlocked doors
And I'm fcking lazy
Everyone had turned to watch X-Ray. Suddenly, he had jumped up on to the coffee table in front of him, air guitaring and thrashing his head so that if he had floppy, sexy rock star hair it would flail everywhere.
Bite my lip and close my eyes
Take me away to paradise
I'm so damn bored I'm going blind!
And I smell like shit!
Slowly, X-Ray hopped back on the couch. He sat there, bobbing his foot to Mike Dirnt rocking out on bass.
Peel me off this Velcro seat and get me moving
I sure as hell can't do it by myself
I'm feeling like a dog in heat
Barred indoors from the summer street
I locked the door to my own cell
And I lost the key
An evil grin spread across X-Ray's face. He jumped violently on the table, and started rocking out air guitar style, biting his lip and closing his eyes for extra effect.
Bite my lip and close my eyes
Take me away to paradise
I'm so damn bored I'm going blind!
And I smell like shit!
I got no motivation
Where is my motivation
No time for the motivation
Smoking my inspiration
At this, X-Ray went crazy. He hopped of the table like a crazy rock star, and ran around the room doing air guitar. After about 15 seconds, he sat calmly on the couch again.
I sit around and watch the phone but no one's calling
Call me pathetic call me what you will
My mother says to get a job
But she don't like the one she's got
When masturbation's lost its fun
You're fcking breaking
Once again, X-Ray had jumped on the table. He was air guitaring like crazy, and if he had sexy rock star hair, it would be shaking everywhere. If only...
Bite my lip and close my eyes
Take me away to paradise
I'm so damn bored I'm going blind
And loneliness has to suffice
Bite my lip and close my eyes
I'm slipping away to paradise
Some say "Quit or I'll go blind"
But it's just a myth
As if nothing had ever happened, X-Ray sat on couch. He calmly bobbed his foot while Billie Joe Armstrong faded with the guitar. "Do do do doooo. Do do do doooo," he sang under his breath
"That was pretty freaking cool, X-Ray," Squid finally said. "But I really don't want to know what's up with the masturbation part, 'kay?"
"I didn't write the song," X-Ray said, throwing a couch cushion at him.
"You sang it though," Armpit said. "So it must be true."
"Shut up. Is not." X-Ray said.
"Stanley, if it's not the mints, I don't know what it is!" Zero said. He was clearly frustrated.
"Then it's nothing. Come on Zero, not even a genius can make a chemical that makes you sing. That kind of stuff only happens in things like Harry Potter books."
"Harry Potter?" Zero asked, raising his eyebrows.
"He's a...never mind," Stanley said. "The point is, it's not possible. Besides, even if it was, which its not, you'd need some kind of genius. There are no geniuses at Camp Green Lake."
"What about Frizzle?" Zero said. "After all, he made them. How do we know he didn't put in some kind of chemical?"
"We know because it's not possible," Stanley said firmly. "Look, I know you never really went to school, but trust me-it's physically impossible. Goodnight."
"Goodnight," Zero said glumly. Stanley had a point-he was the one who went to school. Zero knew he'd have to prove it was Frizzle on his own. It had to be him-he just knew it.
Dun dun dun! I'm leaving you in suspense...kind of. Muahahahaha. Now that I've laughed evilly, you're in suspense.
I like this chapter much better now. I love both of those songs so much! Backstreet Boys and Green Day are the best! Longview is like the coolest songs ever, because it's totally awesome and Mike is rocking our on bass and Tre is like hardcore on drums! It's kickass! I love Tre...he is my favorite human! He's so funny...and he went to clown college! How cool is that! That's why he can do all those cool things like climbing that big ball in Universal Studios. How awesome is that!
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Holes, Green Day, or Backstreet Boys. I love Backstreet Boys! Just because someone mainly listens to punk and alternative doesn't mean they can't love the Backstreet Boys...
Remember, if you know what song the line "to smash the silence with a brick of self control" comes from, I'll give you a biiiiiig cookie! I don't know about you, but I think cookies are pretty damn good!
Well, you know the deal kiddies-review!