Tokyo International Airport was a beehive of activity, crammed mostly with people coming back from visiting family and friends all over Japan and the world. A few were heading off elsewhere for the New Year. But of all the thousands of people swarming through the airport, there were six people who were not quite sure where they were headed, or how.
"Let's see…" Osaka said, looking at the letter again. She was moving a bit quickly, causing her silky, green scarf to wave gently behind her. "Gate fifteen. Let's see…"
"Miss, PLEASE, you HAVE to put that out!" a voice bellowed. Osaka looked up and saw that it was coming from an area labeled "Gate 15". The voice went on: "There is no smoking in the terminal!"
"Look, pal," a woman's voice replied, "here's a hundred thousand yen if you shut up, leave me the HELL alone, and tell the other mindless drones around here to so the same, K?"
"Ah…" There was a lengthy pause. "Yeah, ok. Enjoy your holiday, Miss Mihama."
"Miss Mihama?" Osaka frowned. "Can't be. Still…"
She walked tentatively into Gate 15, and saw only one other person there, her back to the doorway as she looked out the huge windows at the airport. She was a rather average-sized person, And had a crop of somewhat long, very black hair, but with a few inches of dark orange roots showing, proving it had been a while since her last dye job. She was clad in a pink tube top, and a short, black skirt with a belt made of big, gold loops.
"Can't be…" Osaka whispered. She cleared her throat, then, and tentatively called out: "Chiyo-chan?"
"Chiyo-chan?" the girl turned quickly, and Osaka was rather taken aback by what she saw. It was Chiyo, alright. But her face was longer, her eyes smaller (or her head had grown into them), and her expression colder. Her tube top had "I'm a bitch, deal!" written on it in English, and the letters were stretched across a rather impressive bust line. Nothing like Miss Sakaki, but she had DEFINITELY left Osaka's group in the dust.
"Holy shit," Chiyo said, pulling her cigarette out of her mouth. "Osaka?"
"Ch-chiyo?" She shook her head slowly. "Chiyo, what happened?"
"What do you mean, 'what happened?'"
"Ah…ah heard you yellin' at that airport attendant…"
"That drone?" She snorted and shrugged. "Ah, fuck him. I gave him liquor money, so he's thrilled to bits."
"Chiyo! Such language! And since when are you…ah…"
"Read the shirt, hon." She paused. "What am I saying, you probably have NO idea what it says. Seriously, how much English do you remember?"
"Ah…not much." She shrugged. "But enough to know that shirt's kinda dirty."
"I got worse." She smirked in a way that proved she was proud of it, too.
"So…ah…whatchya been up to, Chiyo-chan?" Osaka was really hopin' someone else would show up, soon. This was startin' to feel weird.
"Well, first off, it's Miss Mihama now. Or Miss Chiyo, if you REALLY can't give up the old name." She took a long drag off her cigarette, and let the smoke out through her nostrils. "And I'm just spending time waiting for Daddy to fucking DIE already, so I can take over the company and make it profitable."
"You…ah…seem to be doing okay…"
"Yeah, but you should see how rich we could REALLY be, with the right business strategy." There was something hungry and predatory in Chiyo's eyes. Something Osaka didn't like at all. "Daddy's a coward, plain and simple. I have a token job with the company that I actually show up to…oh, maybe five months out of the year. Enough to assure me control when his ticker finally quits on him. Should soon, considering what a SHITTY diet he has. It's like he WANTS to rush himself to an early grave. Of course, I can't BLAME him. Mommy can be a GIGANTIC pain in the ass. But, unlike me, he can't skip off to Europe when the urge to ram a fucking knife into her face sets in."
"Well, that's…ah…"
"First thing I'm doing is moving the company stateside." She turned back to the window. "Japan's hicksville. Tokyo has it's moments, but you ain't lived until you've been to New York, or the right parts of LA. And let me tell you, being Asian over there…fuck, I had men jumping through hoops for me, and didn't even have to ACTUALLY touch them, unless I WANTED to.. If you ever go, find yourself a black dude. Seriously. I mean…hell, first time I thought I was going to be torn in half, but I got REAL used to it."
"Ah…" Osaka's mind practically shut down. Was she in the "Twilight Zone" or somethin'? Maybe she was on a "Candid Camera"-type thing. Maybe some has-been celebrity was gonna jump out and scream that she done been punked, or wigged-out, or some other silly slogan.
"Hmm?" Chiyo suddenly said, noticing something over Osaka's shoulder.
"Oh," a voice said, full of regret and, perhaps, a hint of anger. "I wasn't the only one invited, then…"
Osaka turned to see Kaorin standing there, looking almost exactly as she had the last time she had seen her, a solid decade ago. She even still stood in that awkward way of hers, giving her a sort of knock-kneed look. Somehow, this consistency disturbed Osaka more than Chiyo-chan's radical changes.
"Hello, Osaka," Kaorin finally said, smiling and tilting her head to one side a bit. Her tone was a more normal, now. "Who's your friend?"
"She kidding?" Chiyo asked, glancing at Osaka.
"Well, you DO look pretty different, Chiyo-ch…san," she replied.
"Yeah, but YOU noticed, and you're on the fucking MOON half the time."
"Chiyo?" Kaorin took an awkward step back. "What happened!"
"God, I'm going to just keep getting this today, ain't I?" She took a long draw off her cigarette and let the smoke out as an angry huff. "Fine, I'm, saving the explanations until everyone is here, so I can minimize the repetition. But just so you know, none of this chan shit, anymore. Got it?"
"S-sure…"
"Ooh, would you look at that!" Chiyo licked her lips. "Grade-A Matsusaka!"
Osaka turned to see what she was looking at now, and found herself looking at a young, trim pilot standing near the entrance to their gate, talking on a cell phone. Judging by his bags, and his lack of rushing around, he'd just got back from somewhere, and was now on his way home.
"But Chiyo-san, he's not a cow," Osaka said.
"Whatever, I saw him first!" Chiyo ran by, flicking her cigarette towards a long, slender trash can as she did. Osaka was sure it would miss, since she wasn't looking at the can when she did, but it fell right in the center of the opening.
"Ooh, didjya see that?" she asked Kaorin.
"What…what HAPPENED!" she squealed.
"She threw the cigarette…"
"Not that! I mean…what…"
"I guess she grew up. Life happens, after all." She felt a sigh coming on, but she warded it off.
"Right…" Kaorin replied, moving out of the entryway.
"Hi," Osaka heard Chiyo saying to the pilot.
"Uh, hi."
She glanced over, and saw the pilot looking at Chiyo. He was wearin' big, aviator sunglasses. But Osaka was lookin' at the two of them at profile, so she could see the pilot's eyes, where Chiyo couldn't. He sure wasn't lookin' at her face, but Osaka could tell Chiyo wouldn't have cared, even if she knew. Heck, she probably did, in a way.
Osaka didn't hear what Chiyo said next, since she leaned in and whispered something into the pilot's ear. He turned bright red, and glanced around.
"But I don't even have…"
Chiyo reached into her small purse and produced a condom. Osaka gasped, the pilot grinned, and the two moved towards the bathrooms.
"So, Osaka, what have you been doing these past ten years?" Kaorin asked.
"Oh, this n' that." She laughed. "Sleepin' when I can, not that there are as many chances."
"Same old Osaka, huh?"
"Same old Kaorin. Unless…"
"No, same old Kaorin." She shrugged. "Just another face in the crowd. I work in editing, now."
"Ooh, you work on novels n' stuff?"
"Ha, I wish. No, I'm stuck on one of the company's magazines, right now. Few more years and I might get boosted to novels, though."
"Neat."
"No, mundane." She shrugged. "So, what about the personal life? Had any… relationships?"
"Have you?"
"Ah, a few."
"Ooh, were they nice fellas?"
"Well…" Kaorin blushed and blanched. Why had she brought THIS up! "They were certainly NICE, yes."
"With someone now?"
"No, none of them have lasted. They just couldn't live up to my standards of perfection, I guess…"
"What sorta fellas you go for?"
Kaorin cringed at the word "fellas," but if Osaka had noticed this, she made no sign of it.
"Ya like 'em all big n' manly," she continued, "or more delicate, like that fella who delivered Miss Sakaki's letter?"
"The same guy delivered to you, too?" Kaorin asked, surprised. "Big, American, silver hair…"
"Uh-huh, same one."
"Well…" she coughed. "Yes, my tastes are more like…him. Not quite. But he's a lot closer to what I'm looking for, yes."
"OH MY GOD, IT'S YOU GUYS!"
Osaka and Kaorin spun to see Tomo standing there, pointing at them in her usual, theatrical manner. She ran forward, leaving her bags by the entryway, and grabbed Osaka in a big bear hug, spinning her around once and plopping her down.
"It's been AGES!" she started to run towards Kaorin, but she let out a surprised screech and dove behind the row of seats. But Tomo just leapt over the chairs, and landed in a crouch next to her. "YOU WON'T ESCAPE THAT EASY!"
She grabbed Kaorin's neck under one arm, and administered a rather severe noogie to her old classmate with the other hand. Osaka was wondering how to possibly intervene, though at the moment she was still trying to get air back into her lungs. She felt like it had all been squeezed out of her.
"Still a wildcat idiot, huh?" Kagura said, walking into the gate area and dropping her bags on the chair. "I bet you're still slower than Sakaki, too."
"Yeah, well, you're…ah…" Tomo blinked. "YEAH!"
"Can't…breathe…" Kaorin groaned.
"Oh, whoops!" Tomo let her go, stood, and scratched the back of her head, just above the long braid she wore her hair in. "Sorry."
"Ooh!" Osaka walked over and poked at the length of hair, which went down to the small of her back. "Goin' for the Fujiko look again, Tomo?"
"Anyone else here, yet?" Kagura asked, dropping into a chair and spreading her arms across the seatbacks.
"Chiyo WAS here a minute ago…" Kaorin said, looking around. "Osaka, where did she vanish to?"
"Um…think ah saw her headin' towards the bathroom," she offered with an awkward blush.
"Oh…" She shook her head at Osaka's odd reaction, and then looked at the others. "Wait until you SEE her, it's really weird!"
"Wow, the gang's all here, then," someone interrupted. "Well, everyone but Chiyo…but you said she's in the lavatory?"
"Yomi!" Osaka said, turning as she called out. She was stopped short, however, when she actually SAW her. Seems the diets had failed, then. "You look …um… IMPORTANT."
"What, THIS old thing?" Yomi said with a grin, rubbing a sleeve of her obviously-expensive business suit.
The others were looking at her with similar thoughts as Osaka. They fought to keep their expressions neutral or happy. Well, everyone except Tomo. She let her shock show right there on her face, though the dropped jaw slowly twisted into an evil grin.
"HOLY CRAP, YOMI! She shouted, running over to her and poking her right in the stomach. "You got FAT! I'd hug you, but I don't think I could reach all the way…"
She was cut off when the light flashed off Yomi's glasses, and a quick fist slammed her in the stomach. Tomo slowly went down, crumpling into herself, while Yomi calmly walked by and took a seat.
"I see you STILL haven't changed," Yomi grumbled, taking a magazine from her purse. "It's sad, really."
"Ow…"
"Good shot," Kagura said. "You a boxer now, or something?"
"Oh, no. But it seems abusing Tomo is like riding a bike…you never forget how."
"Right…"
Chiyo walked back in, then, smiling and holding her hands behind her head. She paused and glanced around the room, and sighed at the sea of dumbfounded looks she was getting.
"What?" she demanded, dropping her arms so she could dig another cigarette from her bag. "Fuck, you'd all think you'd never seen a billionaire PRODIGY before…"
"My God, it IS you!" Yomi said.
"Heh," Tomo said. "Looks like darling Chiyo-chan…"
"It's san, now." She positively GLOWERED at the group as she lit her cigarette, its tip burning bright. "PREFERABLY Mihama-san, but I'll let you guys slide with Chiyo, for old time's sake."
"Seems like darling Chiyo-san has grown, too," Tomo said quickly, glancing over at Yomi. "But in the way every girl WANTS to…"
"What?" Chiyo laughed, and hefted one of her breasts in her free hand. "Nah, nah, these things are about eighty percent fake."
"Say WHAT?"
"Mmhmm." She winked. "But don't tell any of my boyfriends, they'd be crushed."
"Oh, like they can't TELL," Tomo grumbled.
"They can't." Chiyo thrust her chest forward; she was positively GLOWING with victory. "Top of the line jobs, not even officially on the market. I'm technically a beta-tester. Daddy got me on the list. Most realistic yet."
"Pardon me," a voice said from the boarding ramp. "We're ready to go, ladies."
They all turned to see – shock and surprises! – the mystery delivery man standing there, though now clad in an expensive, expertly-tailored black business suit. He wore no tie, but he did wear a buttoned shirt, with the top few undone to show off the top of his pecs. Everyone had to fight to keep from showing how they were melting inside, save Kaorin and Osaka.
"What about our bags?" Kaorin asked, wrecking her friends' moods.
"I can bring them."
"But who are ya?" Osaka asked, frownin'. "Ah mean, far as I knew, you were a delivery fellah."
"Ah, yes, forgive me for not introducing myself earlier." He bowed deeply, in a sort of over-dramatic, Western style. "I am William Shatner."
There was a long pause, as everyone glanced awkwardly at one another. Shatner rose, grinning in a slightly tense manner. He knew what was coming. Every time…
"No you ain't," Osaka said. "You're too tall. And too young. And ya ain't lumpy enough."
"It's just a coincidence," he replied, trying not to clench his teeth as he spoke.
"Oh." There was a long pause, during which Osaka blinked, once, and rather slowly. "So how come ya never changed it?"
"Because my mother named me William, and I love my Momma!"
Everyone was surprised by just how adamant this outburst was, as well as the tears welling up in his eyes. He recovered quickly, though, straightening his spine and clearing his throat.
"Right, well." He bowed theatrically again, gesturing towards the gantry with an outstretched arm. "Ladies first."
The flight was one surprise after another. First, the plane was definitely not a run-of-the-mill passenger jet. It was sleek, and black, and had a flat bottom and the most peculiar sort of engines any of them had ever seen. Rather than the big, round jets dangling under the wing by a strip of metal, these were rectangular, and carefully integrated into the shape of it.
Then came the surprise of seeing both Yukari-chan and Nyamo already there, though passed out in their seats. Shatner explained they had arrived quite early, and nodded off not long thereafter. After this, there was the shock of just how FAST the blasted machine was, getting them to Okinawa in no time.
Finally, however, was the fact that they shot right past Okinawa's only major airport. They all demanded to know what was going on (except Osaka, who had apparently decided to join Yukari and Nyamo, and was snoring quietly), but Shatner just grinned and told them to look out the windows.
The wings actually bent, swinging on an axis and pointing the engines straight down. Then, like a gargantuan Harrier, it slowly dropped down. But they were on the sea, still a mile or so off the coast of Iriomote Island. But before long, a huge, clear dome on a metal platform rose dramatically from the waves. The dome opened, the jet landed, the dome closed, and the platform submerged. Outside, fish swam away, terrified.
"Wow, this is better than Scuba diving!" Tomo shouted.
"I'll say!" Kagura said.
"So what…ah…what EXACTLY is Sakaki doing now that she can afford all of this…ah…finery?" Yomi asked, her eyes hidden by reflections off her glasses.
"Oh, she wants me to leave all that to her," Shatner replied. "Surprises and all that."
"Right…" Yomi glanced outside again, thinking: 'I've got a BAD feeling about this…'
After a few moments of going down, the platform suddenly moved IN, towards the island's rock walls. A gargantuan door was there to admit it, and once this shut, the water began to drain outside. Then the dome slowly dropped, and Shatner rose majestically from his seat.
"Ladies." A broad smile split his face. "Welcome to Mistress Neko-chan-sama's Iriomote Base!"
Kaorin was off first, having shoved past even Shatner. He was behind her, and the others were close behind him. Nyamo and Yukari-chan had finally come to, though they still seemed quite hazy, and needed a lot of help off the plane. The cavernous hangar was empty, and everyone looked a little perplexed as they stood at the bottom of the stairs.
"Where's the welcome wagon?" Tomo demanded.
"They should be here in just a moment," Shatner replied. Nearby, a door could be heard sliding open. "Ah, there we go…"
A great many, quick footsteps could be heard approaching. Everyone looked towards the source of the noise, and saw what was apparently a group of very tiny people approaching.
"What in the heck!" Osaka shouted, being the first to make out their exact forms. She took a few, terrified steps back. "Ch-ch-chiyo-chan!"
It was true. A good two dozen Chiyos, looking exactly as the girl had her first year of high school, were approaching, pigtails bobbing as they moved. They all stopped a few feet from the group, smiled, and tilted their heads. It certainly was nowhere NEAR as cute as she had thought it would be.
"Hello, how may we be of service to you?" they all asked in unison. Everyone cringed, and Shatner had to fight to keep his terror inside.
All eyes slowly, slowly turned to Chiyo-san, who had been busy lighting her first cigarette she'd been allowed since they got on the plane. But now the tip was being burned away, since she had frozen there, the lighter still burning.
"You're fucking KIDDING," she finally said.
"Ooh!" one of the many Chiyos said, her eyes locking on Chiyo-san. "I think…I think it is The Template!"
"The Template, The Template!" All the Chiyo-chans began to intone as one, bobbing up and down.
"Oh, fuck me…" Chiyo mumbled.
"I think that pilot already did that," Osaka replied, but no one heard her surprisingly fast and witty comeback over the din of the Chiyo-chans.
"Now, now, Chiyo-chan, everyone knows that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery," a new voice said from the doorway.
"MISS SAKAKI!" Kaorin screamed, running forward, plowing through the group of Chiyos and knocking a few over in the process. Their companions asked them if they were alright and began to help them up.
"Kaorin," Sakaki said quietly, accepting the oncoming woman in a tight embrace. Then she held her at arm's length, studying her for a moment. "It has been so long. I have missed you."
"Oh!" Kaorin's eyes grew a bit dewy. "Miss…Miss Sakaki…"
"Hello, everyone," she said, looking over at the group. "I've been so looking forward to seeing you all again."
Sakaki had grown much more…rugged-looking since the others had last seen her. She was tanned, like she worked outside a lot, and had developed a slightly more slender, lithe form. Other than that, however, she was identical. Same, long hair, same, sharp, dark eyes, same gentle face. She wore a simple, white dress, with a peculiar, angular cat's-head design on the chest and shoulders. Mayaa peeked out from behind the folds of her dress, and let out a long 'meow.'
"What the HELL is going on!" Chiyo demanded, grabbing one of her facsimiles by a pigtail and giving it a good, solid yank.
"They are the Chiyo-clones, my servants," Sakaki explained, as though it were the most natural thing in the world. "Do you not like them?"
"Look, THIS is an image I was MORE than happy to dump AGES ago," she replied, finally going about lighting herself a new cigarette. "Whenever I remember how I was back then, I feel like a huge ASS."
"I am…sorry you feel that way," Sakaki replied.
"Better to be cool than cute, sweetheart. You're living proof."
"I respectfully disagree." She smiled, and looked at the others. "And how are you all?"
There was a chorus of uncomfortable "oh, yeah, fine" and the like, as everyone looked at everything but Sakaki, Shatner, and the clones. Finally, Yomi bowed her head, coughed, and looked up.
"You're…ah…you're Mistress Neko-chan-sama, then?"
"Ah, good, William has told you, then. He thought it better that I break the news, but I figured it would be more dramatically satisfying if…"
"Wait, Sakaki, who's that?" Tomo asked.
"You're joking! Little Miss Wannabe-ICPO has never heard of the most notorious environmental terrorist of our times!"
"En-environmental terrorist!" Kagura blurted, obviously as shocked as Tomo.
"See," Tomo said, grinning and pointing at Kagura, "she hasn't…"
"But she doesn't want to be a policewoman!" Yomi clapped her hands to her head. "GAH!"
"How do you terrify the environment?" Osaka asked, a hand to her chin in confusion.
"No, no, you IDIOT," Chiyo said, snorting. "It means you terrify PEOPLE to try and make them aware of your extremist, environmental causes."
"Ooooooooh." Osaka blinked. "But Miss Sakaki, that ain't very nice…"
"And what's happening to the Iriomote cats IS?" she demanded, an unexpected fire in her eyes. Kaorin leapt aside, and watched her idol with large, terrified eyes. "What's happening to the rainforests is NICE? What mankind is doing to this planet on a daily basis isn't CRUEL?"
"Makes me money, so what do I care?" Chiyo-san said, shrugging.
"It is THESE attitudes I sought to eradicate in my early career." She balled her hands into fists and grit her teeth. "But it did not take me long to realize that legislation and common sense were not going to work. Not when world leaders try to deny the existence of the greenhouse effect, destroy wildlife preserves in the name of oil, torch trees to make way for more farms for our BURGEONING, insatiable population. I hate to quote a corny action film, my friends, but it is true: human beings…are a disease."
"Ladies and gentlemen, SANITY has left the building, g'night!" Chiyo said.
"I…I did not EXPECT you to quite see things my way from the start." She nodded, and looked a little sad. "I understand that my…choices may seem a bit extreme, somewhat odd. But I think, if you stay here long enough, you will under…"
"We're not staying!" Yomi snapped, the base's artificial lighting somehow glinting rather dramatically off her lenses. "You send us home right now!"
"Mm, but there is the problem. I am your only way out of here, and I still desire your company." She turned, and started to leave. Mayaa ran after her, and leapt onto her shoulder. "You will have free reign of the place, once William has shown you to your rooms. Dinner will be served at eight, just ask a Chiyo how to get to the dining room."
Then she was gone again, the door sliding shut behind her.
"Chiyos!" William Shatner called out almost immediately.
"Yes, sir!" they all shouted as one, saluting as they did. Shatner had to keep from letting out a scream of the purest horror.
"Go get the girl's things, bring them to their rooms!"
"Sir!"
They all filed past, giggling and chatting to one another. Everyone ignored them, except Chiyo-san, who was trying to keep from vomiting. Then one stopped and looked up at her, smiling and staring up at her.
"Were my eyes REALLY that gargantuan?" she asked no one in particular.
"Oh, yeah," Tomo replied.
"Shit." She frowned down at her tiny double. "So, what do you WANT, already!"
"I have always wanted to meet the Template," she said. "Without the Template, there would be no me. I am grateful to the Template for that."
"Uh…you're welcome?"
"Tee-hee!" She tilted her head, her grin grew, and her eyes shut. Then she skipped up the stairs to help the others…and tripped halfway up, banging her forehead off a step.
"Yep, they're DEFINITELY clones of you," Tomo quipped.
"Go to hell, Takino," Chiyo grumbled.
To be concluded…