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Chapter Three – Brother Lost
"…Or I could kidnap that stupid floating moose, and hold it to ransom! It'd be easier to hold hostage than that stupid little robot…"
Dib was walking down the street, hands in pockets, kicking a can along. As usual, he was talking to himself out loud. He'd tried all sorts of plans to get evidence on Zim, and he'd just about run out if ideas. The plan of the moment was to kick a can into Zim's yard, and run past the gnomes while they shot at it, distracted.
It probably wouldn't work, but it was worth a shot. He looked up from the can on the ground and his eyes met with a wave of flame and smoke. Coughing, and shielding his face with his sleeves, Dib dropped to the ground. It had to be Zim. No one else would have been able to cause this explosion.
"Can't… breathe…" he coughed, spluttering. Small pieces of wood flew by him. A squirrel got stuck in his hair. It bit his hand, and jumped to freedom.
A small figure flew across his field of view, concealed by smoke, showing just shadow. Was it Zim? No, it was too small. Dib slowly got to his feet, and found himself confronted by two glowing yellow eyes.
"Human detected. Cranium size, large"
"Hey! My cra… I mean, my head's not large!" Dib argued.
"Are you defying Irken technology?" the stranger asked.
Dib could have just turned and walked away. But he had to have the last word.
"Yes, I am. Irkens are stupid.", he replied, crossing his arms.
"You…"
"Especially robots" Dib added.
The smoke cleared. Dib moved his head upwards to comply with the SIR unit's hovering.
"Wait a minute… you're not G…"
He didn't get to finish. Almost immediately, RIR had fired another missile. Dib screamed and began running back down the street, missile in pursuit.
"IDON'TWANNADIE!" he screamed, speeding up. Unfortunately, something heavy and metallic fell from the sky and hit him hard on the head, causing him to fall over.
"Bighead boy!"
The missile collided with the robot that had hit him, and there was an explosion. Flame and smoke shrouded Dib, and engulfed him with heat. He felt faint, and went unconscious.
"RIR?" Rai called, walking down the street in his Earth disguise. He'd felt a disturbance through the ground's vibrations, and decided to make sure it wasn't RIR's fault.
RIR had a personality disorder, which meant he often took action before thinking. There was a chance he'd gone and hurt someone. The first time he'd done it was shortly after his activation. To make a long and boring story short and interesting, it wiped out half the SIR units. The full story's a story for another time.
Suddenly, he tripped over something. He recognised it from all the other times it'd happened.
"RIR!" he yelled, picking up the SIR unit from the ground. It quickly turned to face him, screamed something happily and hugged his head. Unfortunately for Rai, the SIR unit had been eating something sticky. "Since when have you been eat…"
He looked at the robot in front of him. It looked like RIR… but it wasn't. It was lightly coloured, and had light blue eyes.
"Hiii!" it screeched, waving its arms. "Wanna taco?"
Before he could understand what the robot had said, the little SIR unit had shoved half a taco into his mouth. There was much mumbling and chewing, before Rai could say anything again.
"W-WHAT ARE YOU?" he asked, in his Irken yell. Suddenly he found himself acting like Zim… and put the robot down.
'Could this be Zim's 'advanced' SIR unit?' he thought to himself, staring deep into the robot's eyes.
"My name's GIR! I like nachos… got any nachos?"
"Where's Zim?" Rai asked. GIR pointed at himself.
"Master gone boomy! Black puppy came in and destroyed everything! Then an evil vampire squirrel thing came in and ate the scary monkey! I like burning things!"
Rai just backed away. From what he'd been told, something had happened to Zim.
"Wait a second…" he realised, turning to face GIR, who was proceeding with the ritual of eating his own legs, "did you say 'black puppy'?"
"Yep!"
"RIR…"
"Yessus?" GIR asked.
"Not you… my friend RIR… I think he's gone insane…"
Rai turned and walked down the street. He was alone.
It was about eight at night. A tremendous evil kicked down the door to Dib's room.
"DIB! WE'RE OUT OF FOOD! GO BUY SOME!" Gaz yelled, looking around the room. Dib wasn't there. It wasn't like her brother to disobey her: after all, he knew what would happen. She stormed down the stairs, and left the house, slamming the door so hard it shattered several windows in the street.
"DIIIIB!" she yelled, heading towards Zim's house. It had to be that stupid alien. It was always that stupid alien. That was when she saw two brightly coloured eyes staring at her from the shadows. Which, considering it was night, made the eyes impossible to miss. Gaz stormed over to it, grabbed the SIR unit by the head and repeatedly slammed it on the ground.
"Where's my brother?" she asked forcefully, increasing the amount of smashing.
"Dibby gone boomy! Master gone boomy!" the SIR unit replied, in-between bursts of enjoyment.
An angry look sparked on Gaz's face.
"Well, I suggest you find them, before I TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB!" Gaz yelled, dropping the SIR unit to the ground. "I'M HUNGRY!"
GIR immediately handed her a slice of pepperoni pizza. Gaz snatched it off him, and ate it. She muttered something, which sounded almost like a thanks, and walked off. In a red house, across the street, a pair of bright blue eyes was watching her.