A/N: YAY! My exams are over! I never have to go back to that squalid hellhole again (I'm talking about my school here, as you can see I hold a very high opinion of it…NOT!). I'm free…FREE…FREE AS A BIRD! I apologies for being so hyper, but this may very well be the best day of my life. Oh and has anyone been watching Corrie? I watched it last night, and Craig wasn't in it! I then screamed and shouted at my TV. I sit there, waiting for Craig to come on…and he doesn't! Oh dear, I'm getting sidetracked.

Anyway…this chapter…not much to say really, it was a little bugger to write at but it got easier as it went on (like dental work) and it turned out okay. Again, apologies for spelling mistakes, I'm a hopeless typer and an ever more hopeless speller…combine the two and I'm completely and utterly hopeless! So I hope you won't be offended or irritated by it!

I'd better shut up now, cos this is a long A/N. BIG BIG BIG Thanks you's to those who've reviewed! Huggles to all of you!

Sunrise over the Tango factory.

If there was one thing Rimmer was good at, it was nagging. In fact, he was so good, that if there was ever a contest for who was the 'universes greatest nagger', Rimmer would win hands down.

It being the only thing he wasgood at (apart from failing exams and being cowardly) Rimmer took great pride in his nagging, and poured a whole lot of effort into it.

He was actually rather intimating in 'full on rant' mode. He'd sat Lister in a chair and paced in front of him, arms folded behind his back, head held high all to further emphasise his annoyance.

He was like some highly-strung barrister in the midst of prosecuting. Occasionally he would fire points at you, trying to slip you up. And if you said something he found you said particularly interesting or funny, he'd turn to an invisible jury and repeat it, laughing.

It was times like this that made Lister think Rimmer was a few highlights short of a boy band. Not that he could tell Rimmer this, the hologram was too busy yelling. So all Lister could do was sit there, be bored and hope to God that Rimmer would come down with a particually bad bout of laryngitis.

He didn't.

"Did you ever stop to think for even a nanosecond what would happen if your plan didn't work?" Rimmer asked, managing to sneer at the same time as talking.

"No" muttered Lister, turning away

"I didn't quite hear that!" said Rimmer, leaning in and pointing to his ear in an irritating fashion.

Lister rolled his eyes and said, half shouting "NO, I DID NOT THINK ABOUT WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF MY PLAN DIDN'T WORK!" he then glared at the hologram,

"I thought not!" sniffed Rimmer, he paused for a second, leading Lister to think that he'd shut up "You never think about anyone but yourself!"

"No I don't!" retorted Lister, "I rescued you as well…why I will never know…I should have left you in that smeggin' cell…done us all a favour!"

Rimmer chose to ignore this, there were more pressing matters at hand. "I'm not saying I'm not grateful that we escaped…another day in there and I would have gnawed my own leg off through boredom and insanity…but why…why in the name of all that is holy did you bring a murderous, destructive, killing machine with you!"

"Her names Toni!"

"Oh it has a name now does it," sniped Rimmer, "Funny, I didn't think you were supposed to name weapons of mass destruction!"

"Rimmer" said Lister, with forced calmness "Do me a favour…find whatever is shoved up your arse, remove it and get off my case!"

"I'll have you know there is nothing shoved up my arse!" shouted Rimmer, turning red "and no I will not get off your case, because this is perhaps the most stupid, immature, ill thought out stunt you've ever pulled in your entire life…and you've done some pretty stupid things in your time!"

"Why d'you think this whole situation is a complete disaster?" asked Lister "Don't you get it, Toni's female…or hadn't you noticed?

"I had" piped up the Cat from the cockpit,

"Stay out of this, Felix!" snapped Rimmer, he turned back to Lister "And for your information, yes I had noticed Toni was a woman. But I fail to see how that makes this whole mess any better!"

"Rimmer, do I really have to explain the birds and the bees to you?" asked Lister, struggling not to smirk.

Rimmer's face remained cold and expressionless; he blinked at Lister before saying, "are you seriously suggesting that you and Toni repopulate the universe!"

Lister grinned and nodded "we'd need a lot of practice first, but I reckon we could do it!"

"Great!" said Rimmer, after a short pause "Sen-smegin-sational. We'll recreate the human race with the offspring of a lager lout and a killing machine! Perfect! Oh what a happy happy world it will be!" he sang sarcastically.

"How can you be so negative about everything!" asked Lister, frowning at him.

"It's a gift!"

"Sounds like a curse to me," grinned the Cat, determined to have the last word.

Toni sat in her new bunk; he knees drew up to her chest as she took in her surroundings.

Everything was so different.

She'd lived on the G.E.L.F ship all her life; she knew every corridor, every room, and every set of stairs. Every detail about that ship, no matter how miniscule, had been etched on her brain.

Boring wasn't the word to describe her life.

It was monotonous. More than monotonous…it was monotonously monotonous!

Every day the same. Never changing. No variety. No excitement.

It was easy to see why she longed for something more.

As a child, she was branded a troublemaker. She possessed an inquisitive mind and would, always without fail, ask questions.

The elder G.E.L.F's didn't like this. To ask questions was to disobey orders. Toni remembered sullenly all the times she'd been clipped on the side of the head for merely asking something.

At the age of 13 she decided on 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!. Yes, she'd follow orders, but what went on inside her own head was Toni's business. So she carried on with her life (if it could be called that), and it remained the same as it always had been.

Boring.

That was until Lister turned up.

Toni smiled as she remembered chasing him down the darkened corridor. It had been the first piece of action she's seen in nearly 5 years and she was desperate for a bit of exhilaration.

She felt her pulse quicken as she laid eyes on him for the first time. She'd gotten used to everything looking the same. The G.E.L.F's were all of similar build and appearance and the regulation uniform they wore only added to the similarity.

But Lister looked so different that it unnerved Toni for a brief second. He spoke different too, with an accent she'd never heard before. It sent shivers down her spine and when he looked directly into her eyes, Toni felt something she'd never experienced before. It made her feel as if everything was going to be okay from now on.

Lister was exciting; he had a dangerous quality about him. Toin had never met a person like him before and she liked that!

He gave her something to look forward to and, perhaps, gave her something she will treasure all of her life.

Freedom.

Toni sighed and fell back onto the pillows. This was all going to take some getting used to, but as someone once said 'Life is a game – play it!'

And that was exactly what Toni was going to do.