Switcheroo
By Emmy
A/N: heh heh alright, i swear that it gets funnier later, next chapter, in fact, but this is sort of the intro. I hope you all laugh... and then review... that would be nice. but seriously, this is just about someone, a woman, who manages to switch bodies with Jack, and suddenly everyday things like going to the toilet, steering the ship... and Tortuga get a hell of a lot more interesting.
Jack Sparrow's eyes jerked open and he sat up, mumbling things about blue moons and coffee. His eyes widened further when he looked around.
"Uh… coffee is a really strange drink," he mumbled as he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. His eyes swept over the room again and he shrugged and stood up. Only to be jerked onto the floor by his room tilting due to a wave.
"Okay… I know for a fact that rooms don't randomly tip," he assured himself, "too much coffee must have strange, strange, strange effects on me."
He stood up once again, only to fall over… again, this time his room tilted the other way. He let out a loud string of curses that attracted some attention, as Elizabeth rushed into his room and stood in the doorway, a worried expression on her face.
"Jack, what's wrong?" she asked.
"Who the hell are you? Who the hell is Jack?" he asked, his eyes wide as he turned around on the floor, apparently looking for 'Jack.'
"You are, Jack," she replied patiently, reminding herself never to slap him too hard across the head again.
"Me?" he asked as he motioned to himself, "Last time I checked my name was Amy," he told her truthfully.
"Very funny," she retorted sarcastically.
"No… I'm serious, by the way… who the hell are you?" he repeated.
"Apparently you hit your head. I'm Elizabeth, remember me?" she asked, playing along with his odd game.
"No… can you please tell me why I'm a boy?" Jack asked again, catching Liz completely off guard.
"Well… I guess something to do with when you were in your mother's stomach," she reasoned skeptically, wondering where this discussion was heading.
"That's odd," he murmured, "I swear I was born a girl, in fact, right up until about a minute ago I was a girl… coffee does really strange things to a person."
"I'm sorry?" Elizabeth muttered, now staring at her captain as if he had grown a second head.
"It's alright," he replied absently, still gazing around the room.
"Well, everyone is down at the galley when you're ready," she told him after a pause.
When he didn't respond she just shrugged and left him there. After hearing the door close he stared at it for a full two minutes.
"What a spazzed up dream," he muttered, "coffee must have the same affect as eating pizza on steroids before going to bed," he reasoned, before getting up and opening the door. "This 'galley' mustn't be too hard to find."
Oh hell was he wrong.
Review and i'll update and we'll find out about 'Amy', coffee, brain cells, and how to tell if wood is rotten or not.
Luv yaz all
Emmy