[A reminder: Since episode 412, TOW The Embryos, Phoebe has been pregnant; also, Joey and Chandler have switched apartments with Monica and Rachel. Janice returned to Chandler about a month later, in episode 415, TOW All the Rugby.]
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Chandler didn't want Phoebe to tag along on his date with Janice, but she found a way to get around his protests. She spoke with Janice ahead of time and told her that she was pregnant and wanted advice from somebody who'd already had a baby. Chandler wanted to tell her to wait and have this talk with Janice later, or else go to her birthmom or Carol, but Janice was kindly enough to let Phoebe come with them anyway.
"You have to humor a pregnant woman when she's in a mood," Janice explained to Chandler as they headed to the theatre together. Besides, she wanted to hear the full story about why Phoebe agreed to be a surrogate for her brother.
After the show ended, Chandler and Janice returned from their date, with Phoebe still stubbornly following them.
"Oh, you sing *Old Man River* beautifully!" Phoebe said to Janice.
Chandler on the other hand knew the limits of Janice's voice, but he knew better than to say anything about it. Janice loved him despite his many faults, so he would happily look past her voice and annoying mannerisms that drove other people crazy.
As they sat down on the orange couch at Central Perk, Chandler tried to hint to Phoebe that she should give them some time alone now, but Phoebe seemed as oblivious to that as she was eccentric in her taste in music.
Just as Phoebe had recently believed Ross to be a musical genius with his keyboards, she believed that Janice's nasal voice was perfect for belting out show tunes. "Janice, you've got to sing a duet with me sometime! Let me get my guitar and I'll teach you Smelly Cat."
Janice laughed and said, "What, I should become your new singing partner? Chandler already told me what happened with you and Leslie."
"Oh he did?" Phoebe turned to Chandler with a smile. "You were talking about me to Janice?"
Chandler nodded and recalled their earlier conversation after leaving the nail salon together. "Well, Janice heard those kitty litter commercials on TV and thought the song sounded familiar, so I told her how that happened."
Phoebe put her hand on Janice's knee and leaned nearer. "What else has he told you so far? How Ross and Rachel broke up? How he got his third nipple removed?"
Janice gasped. "Oh no! Is it true, Bing-a-ling?" Seeing his face was enough to tell her. She was shocked and disappointed. "Oh, how could you?! That was one of the most adorable parts of you!"
Chandler shrugged and frowned. "Well, no one ever liked it as much as you did, and this Ginger girl broke up with me because of it. And she even had an artificial leg!" He sighed pathetically. "I just, I thought you'd never come back to me, Janice, and maybe I should worry about how I was gonna ever be with someone else. Someone who'd stay."
"Oh, my poor Bing-a-ling!" Janice hugged him and put his head against her shoulder. "I'm sorry I left you, honey. I wanted to stay with you so much, but then you told me how you didn't want to break up my family like your dad's boyfriend broke up yours. I thought it was for the best."
He nodded. "Yeah, but it still hurt. And when you said how much you love me, and our love was movie love, I changed my mind and begged you to stay. Why couldn't we be a happy-ending movie, not a sad one?"
"I know!" She lovingly pet his head and kissed him. "Well, we can have our happy ending now, sweetie. Now I know that giving Gary another chance was a mistake, 'cause he just lied and cheated on me again. And that's no kind of home to raise my daughter in. I'm over Gary for good this time, and I'm so glad just to have another chance with you, third nipple or not."
Chandler hugged her and smiled softly. "I-I still have the Lionel Richie album, if you wanna listen to it."
"Oh, yes!" Phoebe nodded. "Chandler does a very good 'Endless Love'. Oh, we should all sing it together! Huh?"
"Phoebe!" Chandler complained. Why couldn't she take a hint?
"Oh, I know it's a duet, but we can take turns!"
Janice shook her head patiently but firmly. "Maybe some other time, Phoebe. Chandler and I want to go--" she looked at him questioningly, "--go reminisce. In private." Then she and Chandler rose to go upstairs, and Phoebe finally stopped following them, although Janice thought she noticed a meaningful, almost longing look in Phoebe's eyes as she watched them go.
***
When Chandler let her into his and Joey's apartment, Janice looked all around and was very impressed. "Oh my God! How amazing is it that you're living here now? I cannot believe Monica was dumb enough to bet this apartment in your little game."
Chandler shrugged. "Well, she's nuts about competition." He took off her coat for her and gestured for her to take a seat in the living room.
Janice kept admiring all the new furniture. "You picked all this out yourself, honey? Oh, it's so swanky! You could be a decorator."
Chandler was busy pouring them glasses of wine, and he laughed dismissively. "Nah. I'm just a data processor."
"Oh, will you stop it! You know you could do anything else you wanted if you just tried."
He smiled and shrugged. He hadn't realized how much he missed how caring and supportive she was. Unlike Chandler's friends, Janice knew all about his job and how unfulfilled he was there. She wanted him to get up the courage to quit.
Chandler brought the wine glasses and sat beside her on the couch. He half joked, "You know I can't quit my job. I'm supporting Joey. And now the chick and the duck." He pointed to the birds that were wandering around the living room.
Janice put her arm around him and rubbed his back. "Well, honey, I'm sure they'd want you to be happy. I mean, even if you don't quit right away, you could do something on the side for now. Like the writing you wanted to do. Or remember when you talked about doing stand-up comedy at the nightclubs?"
Chandler shook his head. "I'd probably get stage fright and bomb. And just 'cause my mom's a writer doesn't mean I'd be any good."
"Oh, honey-bunny!" She hugged him tight and lectured him, "Don't say that! You have gotta start believing in yourself, Chandler Bing!"
"It's hard," he murmured and clung to her tightly. "Especially since you've been gone."
"Well, I'm back now," she said resolutely, "and Janice is gonna make things right once and for all!"
He nodded and smiled, just closing his eyes. "Are you really here, Janice? Tell me I'm not dreaming this. When you left, I used to dream about you, for months. I don't want this to be just another dream."
"It isn't, honey. It isn't." She kissed him tenderly, then much more deeply.
***
"Oh Janice! Janice!"
"Yes, Chandler! Oh yes!"
Joey grimaced as he heard the sex noises coming from Chandler's (formerly Rachel's) bedroom. He covered his ears and felt like he could vomit again. Joey had just come home after staying out most of the night, but he should have remembered how Janice had a way of making sex last all night or all day once she got started.
Why the hell wasn't she at home with her little girl? Why couldn't she still be with Gary, huh? Joey wanted to storm out in disgust, but he had nowhere else to go at this time of night.
He'd tried going over to Ross's place, but Ross was busy with Emily. He'd tried going to Phoebe, but she was depressed about something and kept talking about how wonderful Janice was. Like last time, Rachel and Monica adopted the attitude of "She's Chandler's girlfriend now, so no matter how annoying she is, we should just accept her."
No one understood, so Joey had gone out to the bars to drink. He even tried to pick up a girl to go home with, but when he tried kissing her, he kept thinking about Chandler and Janice. Now he was out of money, and couldn't even take one of the late trains to Queens to stay with his folks.
But how could he possibly stay here and keep listening to THAT? If it weren't still winter, Joey thought he might go outside and sleep on the balcony. But then he realized that he could go sleep on Monica and Rachel's couch. So Joey hurried to get a pillow and blankets from his bedroom, trying not to hear more of those awful noises than necessary. Seeing Hugsy on his bed, Joey grabbed the penguin too and got out of the apartment quickly.
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Chandler didn't want Phoebe to tag along on his date with Janice, but she found a way to get around his protests. She spoke with Janice ahead of time and told her that she was pregnant and wanted advice from somebody who'd already had a baby. Chandler wanted to tell her to wait and have this talk with Janice later, or else go to her birthmom or Carol, but Janice was kindly enough to let Phoebe come with them anyway.
"You have to humor a pregnant woman when she's in a mood," Janice explained to Chandler as they headed to the theatre together. Besides, she wanted to hear the full story about why Phoebe agreed to be a surrogate for her brother.
After the show ended, Chandler and Janice returned from their date, with Phoebe still stubbornly following them.
"Oh, you sing *Old Man River* beautifully!" Phoebe said to Janice.
Chandler on the other hand knew the limits of Janice's voice, but he knew better than to say anything about it. Janice loved him despite his many faults, so he would happily look past her voice and annoying mannerisms that drove other people crazy.
As they sat down on the orange couch at Central Perk, Chandler tried to hint to Phoebe that she should give them some time alone now, but Phoebe seemed as oblivious to that as she was eccentric in her taste in music.
Just as Phoebe had recently believed Ross to be a musical genius with his keyboards, she believed that Janice's nasal voice was perfect for belting out show tunes. "Janice, you've got to sing a duet with me sometime! Let me get my guitar and I'll teach you Smelly Cat."
Janice laughed and said, "What, I should become your new singing partner? Chandler already told me what happened with you and Leslie."
"Oh he did?" Phoebe turned to Chandler with a smile. "You were talking about me to Janice?"
Chandler nodded and recalled their earlier conversation after leaving the nail salon together. "Well, Janice heard those kitty litter commercials on TV and thought the song sounded familiar, so I told her how that happened."
Phoebe put her hand on Janice's knee and leaned nearer. "What else has he told you so far? How Ross and Rachel broke up? How he got his third nipple removed?"
Janice gasped. "Oh no! Is it true, Bing-a-ling?" Seeing his face was enough to tell her. She was shocked and disappointed. "Oh, how could you?! That was one of the most adorable parts of you!"
Chandler shrugged and frowned. "Well, no one ever liked it as much as you did, and this Ginger girl broke up with me because of it. And she even had an artificial leg!" He sighed pathetically. "I just, I thought you'd never come back to me, Janice, and maybe I should worry about how I was gonna ever be with someone else. Someone who'd stay."
"Oh, my poor Bing-a-ling!" Janice hugged him and put his head against her shoulder. "I'm sorry I left you, honey. I wanted to stay with you so much, but then you told me how you didn't want to break up my family like your dad's boyfriend broke up yours. I thought it was for the best."
He nodded. "Yeah, but it still hurt. And when you said how much you love me, and our love was movie love, I changed my mind and begged you to stay. Why couldn't we be a happy-ending movie, not a sad one?"
"I know!" She lovingly pet his head and kissed him. "Well, we can have our happy ending now, sweetie. Now I know that giving Gary another chance was a mistake, 'cause he just lied and cheated on me again. And that's no kind of home to raise my daughter in. I'm over Gary for good this time, and I'm so glad just to have another chance with you, third nipple or not."
Chandler hugged her and smiled softly. "I-I still have the Lionel Richie album, if you wanna listen to it."
"Oh, yes!" Phoebe nodded. "Chandler does a very good 'Endless Love'. Oh, we should all sing it together! Huh?"
"Phoebe!" Chandler complained. Why couldn't she take a hint?
"Oh, I know it's a duet, but we can take turns!"
Janice shook her head patiently but firmly. "Maybe some other time, Phoebe. Chandler and I want to go--" she looked at him questioningly, "--go reminisce. In private." Then she and Chandler rose to go upstairs, and Phoebe finally stopped following them, although Janice thought she noticed a meaningful, almost longing look in Phoebe's eyes as she watched them go.
***
When Chandler let her into his and Joey's apartment, Janice looked all around and was very impressed. "Oh my God! How amazing is it that you're living here now? I cannot believe Monica was dumb enough to bet this apartment in your little game."
Chandler shrugged. "Well, she's nuts about competition." He took off her coat for her and gestured for her to take a seat in the living room.
Janice kept admiring all the new furniture. "You picked all this out yourself, honey? Oh, it's so swanky! You could be a decorator."
Chandler was busy pouring them glasses of wine, and he laughed dismissively. "Nah. I'm just a data processor."
"Oh, will you stop it! You know you could do anything else you wanted if you just tried."
He smiled and shrugged. He hadn't realized how much he missed how caring and supportive she was. Unlike Chandler's friends, Janice knew all about his job and how unfulfilled he was there. She wanted him to get up the courage to quit.
Chandler brought the wine glasses and sat beside her on the couch. He half joked, "You know I can't quit my job. I'm supporting Joey. And now the chick and the duck." He pointed to the birds that were wandering around the living room.
Janice put her arm around him and rubbed his back. "Well, honey, I'm sure they'd want you to be happy. I mean, even if you don't quit right away, you could do something on the side for now. Like the writing you wanted to do. Or remember when you talked about doing stand-up comedy at the nightclubs?"
Chandler shook his head. "I'd probably get stage fright and bomb. And just 'cause my mom's a writer doesn't mean I'd be any good."
"Oh, honey-bunny!" She hugged him tight and lectured him, "Don't say that! You have gotta start believing in yourself, Chandler Bing!"
"It's hard," he murmured and clung to her tightly. "Especially since you've been gone."
"Well, I'm back now," she said resolutely, "and Janice is gonna make things right once and for all!"
He nodded and smiled, just closing his eyes. "Are you really here, Janice? Tell me I'm not dreaming this. When you left, I used to dream about you, for months. I don't want this to be just another dream."
"It isn't, honey. It isn't." She kissed him tenderly, then much more deeply.
***
"Oh Janice! Janice!"
"Yes, Chandler! Oh yes!"
Joey grimaced as he heard the sex noises coming from Chandler's (formerly Rachel's) bedroom. He covered his ears and felt like he could vomit again. Joey had just come home after staying out most of the night, but he should have remembered how Janice had a way of making sex last all night or all day once she got started.
Why the hell wasn't she at home with her little girl? Why couldn't she still be with Gary, huh? Joey wanted to storm out in disgust, but he had nowhere else to go at this time of night.
He'd tried going over to Ross's place, but Ross was busy with Emily. He'd tried going to Phoebe, but she was depressed about something and kept talking about how wonderful Janice was. Like last time, Rachel and Monica adopted the attitude of "She's Chandler's girlfriend now, so no matter how annoying she is, we should just accept her."
No one understood, so Joey had gone out to the bars to drink. He even tried to pick up a girl to go home with, but when he tried kissing her, he kept thinking about Chandler and Janice. Now he was out of money, and couldn't even take one of the late trains to Queens to stay with his folks.
But how could he possibly stay here and keep listening to THAT? If it weren't still winter, Joey thought he might go outside and sleep on the balcony. But then he realized that he could go sleep on Monica and Rachel's couch. So Joey hurried to get a pillow and blankets from his bedroom, trying not to hear more of those awful noises than necessary. Seeing Hugsy on his bed, Joey grabbed the penguin too and got out of the apartment quickly.