In which Theo Doesn't Like Leather Seats.

"Will you stop twitching like a caged hippogriff?" snapped Hannah. She and Theo were in the back of a muggle taxi on the way to Hermione's house. Theo sighed,

"This seat's itching," he sneered.

"It's leather! How can it itch?" demanded Hannah frantically, trying to avoid the taxi driver's curious looks.

Theo sniffed, "Precisely, leather."

Hannah looked at him blankly. Theo sighed again,

"I'm allergic."

"To leather?" Hannah asked disbelievingly.

"No, to muggle things," Theo sniffed. Hannah ground her teeth together.

"You're wearing trousers, it's not chaffing, deal with it!" Theo sat for the rest of the journey with a look on his face which suggested he was a bout ready to start crawl up the walls.

"Are we there yet?" he asked ten minutes later.

"Yes," Hannah replied. Theo frowned,

"We're still moving, how can we be there?"

"I lied," snapped Hannah irritably. He huffed and addressed Hannah,

"What's that?" he asked, indicating the object in her hand.

"It's a bracelet," she replied, showing it to Theo.

"Why aren't you wearing it?" he demanded.

"Because I prefer playing with it," Hannah ground out.

"Why?" Theo asked. Hannah snapped.

"Because I do, okay?" Hannah said angrily, "Can you shut up for the rest of the journey? You're pissing me off royally."

Theo crossed his arms over his chest and huffed in his seat like a child. He said nothing for a few minutes, just tutted at intervals. After a few moments of this the taxi driver switched the radio on and some music started playing.

Theo began humming,

then singing,

then Whistling.

Hannah ground her teeth together, her eyebrows knitted.

"Please," Hannah begged, "for one minute, SHUT UP!" she was breathing hard, red in the face, her hair escaping her neat plait.

Theo stared at her open mouthed. "There's no need to get so worked up," he replied mildly.

"Worked, worked up?" gasped Hannah staring at him in disbelief.

"Yeah, just, deep breaths, Abbot, in through the nose- hey!" Hannah had just thrown her handbag at him. "What was that for?" Theo demanded.

Hannah sniffed, "The breathing wasn't working for me."

It was about fifteen minutes later that Hannah and Theo approached Hermione Granger's house. Hannah still red in the face, hair coming out of her plait and Theo carrying a woman's handbag.

The taxi driver drove off muttering under his breath about married couple's needing counselling.

"Seamus! But my ingredients, you come back with ALCOHOL?" Hermione shrill cries could be heard from outside of her front door.

Seamus' alcohol was appealing to Hannah a lot at that point.

In Which Susan Doesn't Understand Carrots

"Seamus," Hermione moaned in desperation. "Alcohol, why alcohol?"

Seamus looked utterly perplexed, as he put the bottles and cans down on the kitchen table, which Neville had frozen in the process of setting.

"I didn't know what half the things on that list were!" Seamus cried, throwing himself into a chair. Hermione looked about ready to tear her hair out.

"Even Draco knows what carrots are!" she said through gritted teeth. Malfoy nodded from his position in the doorway.

"I read about them in a magazine once." Neville bit his lip to keep from laughing.

"He's not joking," Hermione said grimly to Neville. Neville looked thoroughly out of place and lost.

"Well- how about we do some drinks and cocktails with the alcohol then order in Chinese or something?"

Seamus's eyes widened and he gesticulated frantically towards Neville. "Yes- see; that's what I though all along!"

"But," Hermione whined, "I wanted to cook!" Malfoy snorted from his doorway.

"That in itself was dangerous, Granger. Trust me- this is the best way. I know a guy at a Chinese place." Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Well, okay," Draco amended, "I don't know a guy, but I could check a magaz-"

"No- I'm sure, er," Hermione faltered throwing Draco a worried look- they really shouldn't be feeding the addiction.

A sudden pop made Neville drop all the cutlery he was holding and Seamus spin round in his chair.

"Hi," smiled Susan Bones happily. She was carrying what appeared to be a bottle of liquor and was smiling at them all mildly.

"Susan, do you know a Chinese Restaurant?" Hermione asked desperately. Susan looked thoroughly confused, but replied calmly.

"Yeah, why?"

"Seamus didn't buy the carrots," Hermione replied irritably.

"Carrots aren't Chinese though," Susan replied, confused.

"God- please, Susan, we don't have time, do you know a Chinese restaurant?"

"Er- yeah, hang on," she brought out her wallet from her back pocket. She flicked through it before plucking a card out and handing it to Hermione, who stared at it. Hannah shrugged, "In case I get hungry- dead useful you know."

Seamus nodded understandingly and Hermione, deciding not to press the issue, grabbed her phone off the worktop and punch in the number off the card.

"Er- hello, could I have a selection of food to feed twelve people please?" Hermione paused before giving her address. "And how soon can you have it here for? Right, that's fine thank you, bye."

"Sorted?" asked Neville. Hermione nodded and handed the card back to Hannah, but not before turning on Seamus again.

"Seamus! But my ingredients, you come back with ALCOHOL!" it seemed Hermione wasn't as chilled out as they hoped and Seamus looked very scared. Before he could answer however the doorbell rang. Malfoy walked over to the window and peered onto Hermione's porch.

"It's the couple in need of therapy- should I let 'em in?"