[The comment about Ross's birthday is a very minor attempt to reconcile two out of three references to his birthday. (On the show, he has said that his birthday was in three separate months: March, December, and October.) I'm going to side with his October birthday, since he mentioned it in a season 9 episode when he was at the hospital.]
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Joey came home at about ten o'clock that night, and he paused outside the door to listen. Since he didn't hear Janice's voice, he figured that the coast was clear, so he entered.
Chandler was at the kitchen sink, and he turned around when Joey came in and took off his coat. "Hey! Did you have a good date?"
Not really listening, Joey came closer and stared with disbelief at Chandler. "You're washing the dishes?"
"Yeah. I thought I might as well do them tonight, since I wasn't sure if you were gonna come home from your date or not. Besides, you shouldn't have to clean up for us, Joe, when you did so much already."
Joey dismissed it with a shrug and asked, "So you had a good date?"
"Yeah!" Chandler grinned ecstatically. He really wanted to tell Joey about the impending threesome, and maybe brag a little, but he'd already promised Phoebe and Janice that he would keep it a secret. So he said instead, "Thanks for dinner. It was good, and Janice really liked it too. She wants the recipe."
"Uh, that's nice. I-I guess I could write it down or something, and you could give it to her." He felt a twinge of jealousy at the idea that Janice might cook this dish for Chandler, and possibly even cook it *with* Chandler, but he tried to keep his voice neutral anyway. "How'd it go with the kid?"
"Pretty good. After Ruthie stopped crying, things went a lot better. Janice didn't even mind when I told her about me swearing in front of the kid!"
"It's not like the kid knows what you're saying," Joey replied. "If she's talking, though, and tries to repeat you, it could get embarrassing."
"Yeah. Janice is gonna try to get her interested in repeating other words and songs so that she'll forget what I said by the time grandma and grandpa see her again."
That sounded sensible to Joey. "A couple of those Barney sing-a-long videos oughta do it."
Chandler nodded, then repeated his earlier question. "How was your date?"
"Huh? Oh. Nah, I didn't get a date. I was just really hungry, you know, and didn't wanna waste time having to pick somebody up."
"Really?" Chandler was surprised. It usually didn't take Joey that long to get a date once he turned on the charm, but perhaps he didn't encounter anybody hot enough to distract him from food.
Not wanting to elaborate, Joey came closer and grabbed a dishrag. "Hey, um, let me help you with that. It's faster if you wash, and I dry."
Chandler smiled and joked, "Oh, we're gonna use teamwork on this too?"
"Sure, why not?" Joey dried off the dishes as Chandler finished rinsing them. He remarked hesitantly, "It was, it was kind of fun, us cooking before. Hanging out."
"Yeah," Chandler agreed.
Joey asked, "Maybe, maybe we could do that again sometime?"
"What, cooking?"
"Yeah, or, if you don't have plans for tomorrow night, we could go to that Knicks game maybe."
"Oh, right, that's tomorrow! Yeah, we should go!"
Joey was pleased by his reaction. "Really? You're not doing anything with Janice?"
"No, she said she'd be busy until this weekend. She can't go out every night, 'cause she gets tired from work and taking care of Ruthie."
"Sure. Hey, I got us good seats for the game, 'cause I already bought the tickets."
"You did?"
"Yeah, I didn't know if you'd be busy or not, but I figured I could take Ross instead."
"Oh. But he's probably gonna want to hang out with that British chick Emily; he's been seeing her nonstop since that first weekend in Vermont. I suppose you could have taken a date instead, since you didn't get one tonight, but I'm glad you asked me to go with you."
"So am I. We're gonna have fun!" Joey smiled happily. He had missed hanging out with Chandler recently, first because of his three-day fishing trip with his dad, then because his part in the Charlton Heston movie prevented him from accompanying Chandler to the strip club last week.
After Kathy, Joey had expected that Chandler would have another one of his long dry spells between girlfriends, so that they could hang out together more, but Janice had suddenly come back then and ruined such plans. However, if Chandler was willing to still make time for him, Joey felt that he could probably cope with Janice better and not resent her return so much.
Soon they finished washing and putting away the dishes, then Joey returned Chandler's credit card to him, and showed him the tickets in his coat pocket. They watched some TV with the chick and the duck for a while, then retired to bed.
***
The next night, Joey and Chandler went to the game, where they filled up on snacks and drinks. Chandler missed Janice a little and went off to phone her, but when he returned to his seat, he noticed how much Joey pouted, so he promised not to call again. "Tonight will just be us, okay? Best buds."
"Yeah, best buds." Joey hugged him and finally cheered up. So they watched the basketball game and had a great time. When they got home later, they were drunk and laughing.
"That was an awesome game!"
"Yeah!" Joey cheered. "The Knicks rule all!" He waved his giant foam finger around.
Chandler laughed and wondered why he had indulged Joey yet again by buying him the thing; must have been all the beer he had. Just then, the chick and the duck come over to them, begging for any snacks that the guys might have brought home.
Joey and Chandler tried not to trip over the birds, then they collapsed onto the couch together.
"Come on, guys! We don't have any food. Joey ate everything!"
"Yeah, and remember how sick you got the last time we fed you stuff besides your bird feed."
The birds grumbled, then tried to pick at the foam finger.
Joey pulled it away, accidentally hitting Chandler in the face with the finger.
"Hey!" He was more annoyed than hurt.
"Sorry!" Feeling silly, Joey started to tickle him with the foam finger, and Chandler fought him off while trying to stifle his giggles.
They wound up wrestling against the cushions, both getting rather out of breath. Then Joey stopped and met Chandler's eyes, thinking about how precious these moments were. Pushing the foam finger out of the way, he hugged Chandler close and kissed his cheek.
Startled and embarrassed, Chandler pulled away. "Hey! Don't--don't do that!" He had warned Joey about this gesture before.
"Come on," Joey protested and tried to pull Chandler closer again. "I told you, it's not gay! I'm from an Italian family; men kiss each other sometimes. Haven't you seen *The Godfather*?"
"Well, I'm not Italian, nor a mobster."
Joey pouted. "Neither is Ross, but he lets me kiss him sometimes. In public too!"
"What? In public? No way!"
"He did, in Central Perk! You know, we gave Ross those hockey tickets and I said happy birthday and kissed him and said we love him. He didn't freak out at all."
"No, he was upset! So upset that he said his birthday was seven months ago, when we were really only a couple of days late."
Joey shrugged and hugged him closer. "Why can't I kiss you? You're like my family, Chandler. Like a brother or something. I love you."
Shocked, Chandler blushed and looked deeply uncomfortable.
Joey felt hurt that Chandler didn't appreciate the sentiment, let alone return it.
"Um, I-I gotta go to bed." Pushing free of Joey's arms, Chandler got up from the couch and retreated to his bedroom.
Joey stared at his closed door, feeling rejected and lonely. He kicked the foam finger aside and pouted again. Rationally, he did know that Chandler was very insecure about people thinking him gay, but Joey couldn't help expressing his feelings physically, especially when he was drunk. He couldn't help wanting reciprocation from Chandler too. All their frequent, lingering hugs kept suggesting to him that Chandler wouldn't mind further physical affection. But so far, Chandler had done nothing but reject him.
Because the birds kept picking at the foam finger, Joey pulled it away from them and finally went into his room with it. Tossing the finger on the floor, Joey crawled into bed and clutched Hugsy tightly. He cursed himself for making that same old mistake with Chandler; he really hoped that he hadn't ruined things, just when they had become closer again. Losing Chandler to Janice would be bad enough, but losing Chandler through his own dumbness and lack of self control would be horrible.
"Don't say, 'I love you'," Joey scolded himself. "Say, 'I love you, man' or something else, and always look like you're joking. And never, never kiss him." Joey highly doubted that he'd remember to follow these rules, though.
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Joey came home at about ten o'clock that night, and he paused outside the door to listen. Since he didn't hear Janice's voice, he figured that the coast was clear, so he entered.
Chandler was at the kitchen sink, and he turned around when Joey came in and took off his coat. "Hey! Did you have a good date?"
Not really listening, Joey came closer and stared with disbelief at Chandler. "You're washing the dishes?"
"Yeah. I thought I might as well do them tonight, since I wasn't sure if you were gonna come home from your date or not. Besides, you shouldn't have to clean up for us, Joe, when you did so much already."
Joey dismissed it with a shrug and asked, "So you had a good date?"
"Yeah!" Chandler grinned ecstatically. He really wanted to tell Joey about the impending threesome, and maybe brag a little, but he'd already promised Phoebe and Janice that he would keep it a secret. So he said instead, "Thanks for dinner. It was good, and Janice really liked it too. She wants the recipe."
"Uh, that's nice. I-I guess I could write it down or something, and you could give it to her." He felt a twinge of jealousy at the idea that Janice might cook this dish for Chandler, and possibly even cook it *with* Chandler, but he tried to keep his voice neutral anyway. "How'd it go with the kid?"
"Pretty good. After Ruthie stopped crying, things went a lot better. Janice didn't even mind when I told her about me swearing in front of the kid!"
"It's not like the kid knows what you're saying," Joey replied. "If she's talking, though, and tries to repeat you, it could get embarrassing."
"Yeah. Janice is gonna try to get her interested in repeating other words and songs so that she'll forget what I said by the time grandma and grandpa see her again."
That sounded sensible to Joey. "A couple of those Barney sing-a-long videos oughta do it."
Chandler nodded, then repeated his earlier question. "How was your date?"
"Huh? Oh. Nah, I didn't get a date. I was just really hungry, you know, and didn't wanna waste time having to pick somebody up."
"Really?" Chandler was surprised. It usually didn't take Joey that long to get a date once he turned on the charm, but perhaps he didn't encounter anybody hot enough to distract him from food.
Not wanting to elaborate, Joey came closer and grabbed a dishrag. "Hey, um, let me help you with that. It's faster if you wash, and I dry."
Chandler smiled and joked, "Oh, we're gonna use teamwork on this too?"
"Sure, why not?" Joey dried off the dishes as Chandler finished rinsing them. He remarked hesitantly, "It was, it was kind of fun, us cooking before. Hanging out."
"Yeah," Chandler agreed.
Joey asked, "Maybe, maybe we could do that again sometime?"
"What, cooking?"
"Yeah, or, if you don't have plans for tomorrow night, we could go to that Knicks game maybe."
"Oh, right, that's tomorrow! Yeah, we should go!"
Joey was pleased by his reaction. "Really? You're not doing anything with Janice?"
"No, she said she'd be busy until this weekend. She can't go out every night, 'cause she gets tired from work and taking care of Ruthie."
"Sure. Hey, I got us good seats for the game, 'cause I already bought the tickets."
"You did?"
"Yeah, I didn't know if you'd be busy or not, but I figured I could take Ross instead."
"Oh. But he's probably gonna want to hang out with that British chick Emily; he's been seeing her nonstop since that first weekend in Vermont. I suppose you could have taken a date instead, since you didn't get one tonight, but I'm glad you asked me to go with you."
"So am I. We're gonna have fun!" Joey smiled happily. He had missed hanging out with Chandler recently, first because of his three-day fishing trip with his dad, then because his part in the Charlton Heston movie prevented him from accompanying Chandler to the strip club last week.
After Kathy, Joey had expected that Chandler would have another one of his long dry spells between girlfriends, so that they could hang out together more, but Janice had suddenly come back then and ruined such plans. However, if Chandler was willing to still make time for him, Joey felt that he could probably cope with Janice better and not resent her return so much.
Soon they finished washing and putting away the dishes, then Joey returned Chandler's credit card to him, and showed him the tickets in his coat pocket. They watched some TV with the chick and the duck for a while, then retired to bed.
***
The next night, Joey and Chandler went to the game, where they filled up on snacks and drinks. Chandler missed Janice a little and went off to phone her, but when he returned to his seat, he noticed how much Joey pouted, so he promised not to call again. "Tonight will just be us, okay? Best buds."
"Yeah, best buds." Joey hugged him and finally cheered up. So they watched the basketball game and had a great time. When they got home later, they were drunk and laughing.
"That was an awesome game!"
"Yeah!" Joey cheered. "The Knicks rule all!" He waved his giant foam finger around.
Chandler laughed and wondered why he had indulged Joey yet again by buying him the thing; must have been all the beer he had. Just then, the chick and the duck come over to them, begging for any snacks that the guys might have brought home.
Joey and Chandler tried not to trip over the birds, then they collapsed onto the couch together.
"Come on, guys! We don't have any food. Joey ate everything!"
"Yeah, and remember how sick you got the last time we fed you stuff besides your bird feed."
The birds grumbled, then tried to pick at the foam finger.
Joey pulled it away, accidentally hitting Chandler in the face with the finger.
"Hey!" He was more annoyed than hurt.
"Sorry!" Feeling silly, Joey started to tickle him with the foam finger, and Chandler fought him off while trying to stifle his giggles.
They wound up wrestling against the cushions, both getting rather out of breath. Then Joey stopped and met Chandler's eyes, thinking about how precious these moments were. Pushing the foam finger out of the way, he hugged Chandler close and kissed his cheek.
Startled and embarrassed, Chandler pulled away. "Hey! Don't--don't do that!" He had warned Joey about this gesture before.
"Come on," Joey protested and tried to pull Chandler closer again. "I told you, it's not gay! I'm from an Italian family; men kiss each other sometimes. Haven't you seen *The Godfather*?"
"Well, I'm not Italian, nor a mobster."
Joey pouted. "Neither is Ross, but he lets me kiss him sometimes. In public too!"
"What? In public? No way!"
"He did, in Central Perk! You know, we gave Ross those hockey tickets and I said happy birthday and kissed him and said we love him. He didn't freak out at all."
"No, he was upset! So upset that he said his birthday was seven months ago, when we were really only a couple of days late."
Joey shrugged and hugged him closer. "Why can't I kiss you? You're like my family, Chandler. Like a brother or something. I love you."
Shocked, Chandler blushed and looked deeply uncomfortable.
Joey felt hurt that Chandler didn't appreciate the sentiment, let alone return it.
"Um, I-I gotta go to bed." Pushing free of Joey's arms, Chandler got up from the couch and retreated to his bedroom.
Joey stared at his closed door, feeling rejected and lonely. He kicked the foam finger aside and pouted again. Rationally, he did know that Chandler was very insecure about people thinking him gay, but Joey couldn't help expressing his feelings physically, especially when he was drunk. He couldn't help wanting reciprocation from Chandler too. All their frequent, lingering hugs kept suggesting to him that Chandler wouldn't mind further physical affection. But so far, Chandler had done nothing but reject him.
Because the birds kept picking at the foam finger, Joey pulled it away from them and finally went into his room with it. Tossing the finger on the floor, Joey crawled into bed and clutched Hugsy tightly. He cursed himself for making that same old mistake with Chandler; he really hoped that he hadn't ruined things, just when they had become closer again. Losing Chandler to Janice would be bad enough, but losing Chandler through his own dumbness and lack of self control would be horrible.
"Don't say, 'I love you'," Joey scolded himself. "Say, 'I love you, man' or something else, and always look like you're joking. And never, never kiss him." Joey highly doubted that he'd remember to follow these rules, though.