Disclaimer- If I could write as good as J.K. Rowling I'd well... I'd be J.K. Rowling and I'm not her, so yeah!

Authoress' Note- Stupid disclaimer I know AND the chapter's crappily short, but you may glance at the lengths of the next chapters and I can assure you they are a nice amount of words. I think. What you didn't think the disclaimer was stupid? You think it deserves an award for being the most witty thing you've ever read? Oh shut up, Frank. That's the reason you're imaginary! You can't give a compliment without it being a complete lie! Hmph! E.D.J

Ch. 5- That Evil Git of a Slytherin

"Potions with the Slytherins?" repeated Sirius grumpily at breakfast the next day. "Why don't they just kill me now? They're all slimy pureblood gits."

"Way to insult your family there, mate," James murmured absently.

"Well it's true!" said Sirius indignantly. "Even my family! Ugh, my parents will probably write me saying how I've 'disgraced the family name and Regulus would never be made a Gryffindor!'"

"Regulus?" asked Peter curiously. "Who's he?"

"My little brother; he's about nine," said Sirius, sighing, a hint of disdain to his voice. "My parents favor him. He's a nasty little lout. Bit me once after I called my mum an ugly old hag. Perfect for Slytherin."

"You called your mum an ugly old hag?" gasped Remus.

"She was asking for it," said Sirius defensively. "She wanted to send me to Durmstrang! It's bloody cold there! No, Sirius Black will not freeze his arse off when he could go to the lovely warm school that is Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Of course, Mum threw a fit. They finally let me come here when I threatened to go to the Ministry and tell them Dad made the house Unplottable without their consent. So here I am, and Dad went to the Ministry and got permission, so I couldn't threaten them with that anymore. Oh, but I could do much worse then tell the Ministry the house was Unplottable."

Sirius's grey eyes glinted for a moment, and his friends watched him warily until Sirius shook his head and started talking about the Chudley Cannons's new Keeper.

Sure enough, later, when the huge flock of owls swooped into the Great Hall, a handsome black-feathered owl dropped a letter in Sirius's porridge.

Sirius opened and skimmed over it. "Of course! Just what I thought! They're soooo disappointed. Happy at least Bellatrix's in Slytherin. Rubbish."

He crumpled up the letter and threw it in his goblet of pumpkin juice, scowling fiercely.

James knew better (even after only a day) than to talk to Sirius when he was in a 'mood'. So he turned to Remus.

"You've been awfully quiet, Rem," said James, peering the ill-looking boy across from him. "You're looking awful peaky."

"Oh am I?" asked Remus inattentively. "I suppose I just feel a bit ill. Maybe I'm coming down with something."

"Go see Madam Pomfrey, the school nurse," suggested Peter helpfully.

"Maybe I will," murmured Remus, sounding slightly dazed as he slowly stood up and grabbed his bag. "I'll see you in Potions."

"So anyone know what we do in here?" asked Peter as they entered the dark Potions classroom down in the dungeons.

"Chuck thinks into a pot and stir it," said Sirius, grinning, his unfortunate letter already forgotten. "Sounds easy enough."

"Yes, I suppose it'd be easy for someone of your intelligence," said a sneering voice.

Sirius turned around and found himself face to face with a Slytherin boy with dark greasy hair and a hooknose.

The boy smirked at Sirius. "Wasn't your family so disappointed when they heard you weren't Slytherin material?"

"That depends on who's asking," growled Sirius, casually taking his wand out, his eyes glinting dangerously again.

"Severus Snape," said the boy, his lip curling. "A pleasure. For you at least."

"Of course the pleasure's all mine," said Sirius sarcastically, his eyes blazing as he glared at Snape.

"At least the Black family has someone to be proud of," said Bellatrix Black, stepping out from behind Snape, her eyes filled with disdain."Not some lousy Gryffindor."

"Don't insult him!" James snapped angrily, his gaze steely. "If being in Slytherin involves sharing a House with you, I'd choose Gryffindor in a heartbeat."

"And you are?" asked Snape in a bored voice.

"James Potter," said James icily, gripping his wand tightly. "And I'd back down if you have any idea who I am."

"Well, Potter, clearly you have no idea who I am," growled Snape, his eyes flashing.

"Oh we know who you are," said Remus, suddenly appearing in the doorway. "A slimy git of a Slytherin!"

Peter looked uncertainly from the seated students watching the row to his three friends standing with their wands pointed at Snape. He shuddered nervously.

"I think you three need a lesson in manners," said Snape, raising his wand and shouting, "Conjunc..."

Oops cliffie. (evil grin) E.D.J.