A/N: Trying to make up and updating more tonight. Please continue to review!

Chapter Twelve: Set Back

Lily shut the door to her dorm room after a long evening spent patrolling. It was only nine o'clock—she and James had the early shift, and yet she was completely exhausted and emotionally drained. That evening with James, walking the empty corridors, breaking up couples in broom closets, sending first years back to bed—would have been so much more bearable if James hadn't been silent. She knew that he knew something was up, and it was bothering her. She knew he didn't know the whole story—she had made Allison and Ellie promise not to say a word, and as far she knew Emerson wouldn't brag about not being accepted right away.

She let herself fall onto her bed and felt the tiredness flow out of her body. In minutes, she was fast asleep, letting her thoughts and worries evaporate into her dreams.

It was at four a.m. that she woke up, gasping. She knew---she knew now what she was feeling and it scared her.

She liked James.

How it happened she didn't know—as to when it first happened she was just as lost, but she knew that now she understood why she had been feeling so mixed up. Lily swore, breathing in and out. She couldn't let this happen. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for Sirius, Allison, Ellie, the student body, and James to be right. All along. They couldn't know. Why did everybody constantly act as if they knew her? She wasn't going to let them be right. She had to stop it before it got out of control, and she knew just how.

Only slightly aware of her tired appearance, and the small bags that were forming under her tired eyes, Lily marched over to the Hufflepuff table, where Emerson Burton sat talking and eating breakfast with his friends.

Emerson saw her coming and excused himself and went to meet her.

"Have you thought it over?" he asked expectantly.

Lily nodded. "Yes—I'd love to go to Hogsmeade with you."

Emerson beamed at her and nodded. "Alright then. Saturday, we'll meet after breakfast and we'll go and have a wonderful time." He smiled confidently.

Lily forced a pleasant form to her face and she smiled back. "Alright, see you then." She waved and headed over to where the Gryffindor seventh-years gawked at her.

James dropped his toast and looked glumly into his coffee.

She had said yes, and there was nothing he could do.

James lay on the hard wood floor of the Gryffindor Seventh year boys' dorm.

He lay in his sodden and wet Quidditch robes in a depressed haze, firewhiskey bottle in his hand with Remus, Sirius, and Peter staring worriedly at him, unsure of what to say to make their lovesick friend feel better.

He felt sick, not just because of the tense and exhilarating practice he had put his team through that afternoon, or that fact that he had consumed three-fourths a bottle of firewhiskey by himself, but because he felt lost and empty. As if he had lost the biggest Quidditch match of his entire life in front of everyone he had ever cared about.

"Prongs, don't let this get you down. It's not like she's getting married to Emerson." reasoned Remus. "It probably won't last very long, he's a complete arse with a reputation that could rival Padfoot's."

This only made James take another swig. "That's just it. Why would she do a thing like say yes to that scumbag! I've changed, for her I changed! She knows that!"

"Love is hard. You have to work at it." offered Sirius.

James stood up wobbly, pointing a finger angrily at Sirius. "Don't you dare quote her! Padfoot don't!"

Sirius rubbed his chin. "Is that where I heard that? It sure is true…" With a glance at James he shut up. "Dumb filthy wench. She has no right to treat you like this, Prongs."

James let out a sob. "But she is…and I still love her…I still love her. I think maybe, she might love me too."

"Nobody that loves you would do this to you, Prongs." offered Peter, sharing his rare wisdom.

"She's pretty twisted. She might." argued Sirius. " A twisted, mental wench—that can fix cuts in a splendid way—but a filthy slag all the same!"

James just let out a breath and collapsed onto a bed that used to be his.

Sirius jumped up excitedly. "That's it, Prongs! We'll get dates. Don't you worry, mate. You'll have a hot date, we both will!"

James started to protest but passed out in his drunken haze.

Saturday morning came too fast for James as he fell out of bed. Sirius was still snoring away, as was Peter. Remus was up bright and early and had already showered and gotten dressed. James suspected it was because out of nerves and excitement in anticipation of his date with Ellie. James smiled tiredly at Remus as he brushed his hair in the mirror. James stood up and went to go to the shower.

His severe sadness had somewhat subsided, and his heartbreak had numbed a little. James wasn't going to have a bad day today, despite events. Sirius had a plan.

Sirius had gotten them dates, Madeline Foster, a beautiful Gryffindor sixth year that was a little senseless but gorgeous, so Sirius had no problem with her. Her friend, Dinah Perks, same year from Hufflepuff, was pretty as well, with bright, wavy blonde hair, light greenish blue eyes, and a figure to die for. She was to be James's date. If Sirius had his way, the dates he had picked out would distract James from Lily long enough for him to have fun. And if they didn't work, they would go Quidditch supply shopping. Quidditch could always brighten James's day.

Lily turned off her alarm with her wand as soon as it started blaring an incessant beeping. She yawned, stretched, and got out of bed. Before taking her things to the shower, she checked herself in the mirror.

Why was she doing this? Sure, Emerson was attractive—and she was attracted to him. But why did she have the sneaking guilty feeling at the pit of her stomach? She had to do this, she couldn't like James. She sighed and headed for the showers.

After breakfast, Lily met Emerson and they headed towards the village of Hogsmeade.

"I was thinking we could go to Honeydukes first." suggested Emerson, blonde hair rustling through the breeze, he smiled at Lily, and she returned the smile, because Emerson Burton had a way of making her forget where she was or what she was thinking, and she liked that.

"That sounds lovely."

Sirius led James to the entry of Hogsmeade and stopped.

"Why are we stopping?" asked James, still in a bitter mood.

Sirius smiled and pulled out a cigarette while he waited he politely offered one to James, who turned him down, and lit up.

"Those things will bloody kill you, Padfoot." he remarked, disgusted. Sirius shrugged as he blew out smoke.

He caught site of a girl with curly chocolate- brown hair flowing down her shoulders and her friend, James's date, with wavy blonde hair.

"Here they are." answered Sirius as they approached.

James turned around to see two beautiful girls walking towards them. Madeline Foster and Dinah Perks.

James glared at Sirius. "I told you I didn't want to go on a date."

Sirius smirked at his best friend. "No you didn't."

James opened his mouth to argue, but was stopped as Sirius greeted their dates.

"Good morning, lovely ladies." he greeted as he kissed Madeline's hand, making her blush.

James rolled his eyes at his friend.

"This is James, as I'm sure you know." introduced Sirius to Dinah.

James smiled and waved. "Good morning."

Dinah, smiled warmly. "Good morning."

"So what do you have planned, Sirius?" asked Madeline, with a sweet tone in her voice.

Sirius smiled at her. "Anything you'd like, love."

"I can't believe she's actually going on a date with Emerson Burton." stated Jacob Oakes as he and Allison walked the streets of Hogsmeade, window shopping. He was currently holding a few of Allison's bags, and listening to her rant about Lily's love life.

Allison sighed. "Believe it. And the thing is, I think it's only because she is scared of getting close to James."

Jacob nodded, paying more attention to Allison than anything she said. "But still—Burton. He's a sleaze. Doesn't Lily know that?"

Allison smiled and kissed Jacob spontaneously. "Well, she might know it deep down. But you have to admit, Emerson is beautiful. He could delude the most sensible minds with his looks."

Jacob raised an eyebrow. "I hope not yours." he smiled as a blush formed on Allison's cheeks.

"Oh course not. I like you're dark features much better, love." She kissed him again. "And I'm sure Emerson can't kiss anything like you."

Jacob smiled and kissed her again. "Don't try to find out, love."

Allison grinned. "I won't."

James sat with Dinah across from Sirius and Madeline in a booth at Madam Puddifoot's. James was inwardly groaning. The lacy, frilly, sappy décor of the café disgusted him and it had taken all of his self-control to let Madeline and Dinah drag him and Sirius there after they had window-shopped at a few fashion outlets.

"I really liked that ruby dress robe." chatted Dinah, mindlessly, to the only person that was really listening, Madeline.

"Yes it was simply lovely." replied Madeline.

"I really would like the hot chocolate with whipped cream." Dinah spoke up as she looked through the menu.

James stared at the menu, not really comprehending anything. This was going horribly. He couldn't get a word in—but he didn't really want to. Dinah had no interesting conversation topics for him to join in on, either.

Suddenly, James felt a hand on his leg. Startled, he looked towards Dinah, who was smiling innocently and motioning to the waitress.

"He'd like a hot chocolate with whipped cream as well." she ordered, sweetly.

James glanced at Sirius. Dinah had just gotten his attention to order, but hadn't given him the chance to. Sirius sensing his friend's agitation, gave him an apologetic look.

Just then, a certain red-head caught his attention, walking in Madam Puddifoot's, guided by none other than Emerson Burton. At the site of Lily, James stomach flip-flopped, but when he saw Burton, his stomach stopped mid flip and he felt angry.

"Well Sirius and I are going to go tour the village." explained Madeline as she reached for Sirius hand and led him toward the café exit.

Sirius threw James a very apologetic look and shrugged.

James looked down into his hot chocolate depressingly, and was not even perturbed when a manicured finger dipped into his hot chocolate and took the whipped cream off the top.

James looked up at Dinah as she put the finger into her mouth and slid it out, looking at James very seductively. If James hadn't been sitting down, he may have fallen, for that look gave him a specific weakness of the knees, and he felt a surge of desire.

He leant in and kissed her deeply, letting her hands travel down his chest.

"I thought you'd like chocolate to start off the morning." stated Emerson as he held a open the door to Madam Puddifoot's open for a giddy Lily.

"Yes, it was an excellent idea." she smiled as he led her to a seat.

And then she saw him, on a date—a double date with Sirius and girls she knew Sirius must have picked out. They were exactly his type—superficial, forward, and beautiful.

She felt a slight pang of jealousy, but with one glance at James she could tell he wasn't enjoying himself. And as demonic as it was, it pleased her to see him not having a good time. Not because she wanted to see him suffer, but because if he had been having a good time, she didn't know what she would have done—or felt.

The waitress came and handed them the menus.

She smiled politely. "Thank-you."

As she sat down, she glanced at James's table again. Sirius was leaving with Madeline, leaving James alone with Dinah in a dark booth. James looked sullen.

"I think we'll get hot chocolate." conversed Emerson as he eyed the menu. "Definitely hot chocolate."

Lily felt someone bump into her chair.

"Oh, excuse me, Lily." came the voice of Sirius Black. "I didn't see you and Burton there."

Lily gritted her teeth. "I'm sure you didn't, Sirius. You're excused."

Sirius smiled sweetly at the two of them before shooting a glare at Lily and following Madeline, who had not waited for him, out the door.

"What is that bloke's problem?" scoffed Emerson. "A right arrogant arse if you ask me."

"He's not that bad." defended Lily, for a reason she didn't quite know.

As Emerson waved for the waitress to come and take their orders, Lily helplessly glanced back at James's table. She had to hold her mouth to keep her jaw from dropping.

Dinah Perks had just stuck her finger in James's hot chocolate, taking the whipped cream with it. She had put it delicately in her mouth and watched James with batted eye lashes as she pulled it out again. James had immediately begun snogging her.

"So we'll have two hot chocolates with whipped cream." ordered Emerson, oblivious to where Lily's attention was.

Lily looked up at the waitress. "Actually-- no whipped cream for me, please."

The waitress nodded as she scribbled Lily's order down.

Lily felt awkward as she noticed that almost everyone in the café were couples—snogging. She felt increasingly out of place as Emerson looked at her expectantly.

Time for conversation.

"So, is Hufflepuff's team looking good this year?" she tried.

Emerson smiled. "I'd say we're looking pretty talented. But I won't divulge any secerets, I don't want you tipping off Potter." He laughed at his petty joke.

Lily glanced at the table James and his date were currently preoccupied in. She turned back to Emerson.

"Don't worry."

Dinah went in for another kiss and James pulled away. He only looked at her for a second, before looking away.

"This is all wrong." he announced as he slid out of the booth, thanking God that he had insisted on sitting on the outside.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a galleon and placed it on the table.

"I'm sorry." he mumbled. Dinah was looking into her hot chocolate. "I have to go."

With is words, James hurriedly walked out of the café, not without shooting a swift gaze at a certain red head.

James rushed as casually but yet as quickly as possible out of Madam Puddifoot's, shoving his hands into his pockets and walking the student-packed streets of Hogsmeade, looking at the ground.

He found a stone to kick along the path and let out a sigh.

He needed a drink. Not a light butterbeer—he couldn't go to The Three Broomsticks and see all the happy couples and friends. So his heavy feet trailed him to the only other bar he and the Marauders ever ventured in.

James sat down in The Hogs Head with his cloak drawn up, hoping that no one that could have connections with Dumbledore or his parents were lingering around.

"What can I get you?" a dirty, grisly bar tender asked as he wiped a glass with a dirty rag.

James looked at the man for a second, before answering. "Three shots of firewhiskey, please."

The man looked at him skeptically. "You a student?"

"He's with me." came a very familiar voice.

The bartender nodded before going to fetch the drinks. James turned to see his best friend looking at him with a sullen expression to rival his own.

"I'm guessing your date went about as well as mine." greeted James.

Sirius nodded as he took a sip of his drink—a thick blue substance James had never seen.

"Yeah…I saw Grace." Sirius took another gulp. "She saw me walking around town with Madeline and gave me this look." he emptied the glass and looked at James. "She looked at me like she hated me."

James gave his friend a consoling pat on the back, before turning his attention to the shots laid before him.

"It's okay, Padfoot." he downed a shot. "At least she's very clear about how she feels about you."

Sirius and James burst into a fit of alcoholic laughter before becoming depressed and sullen and leaving the Hog's Head.

Thanks to Snail-same, Lily Evans 4 life, and chikichiki for reviewing chapter ten! (yes, i decided to find your names and thank you, because I felt guilty for not doing so last chapter, and it's really the reviewers that matter, isn't it?) Yes, I've sucked up now. please review!