Title: Harry Potter (The-Boy-Who-Scored) and the Half-Blood Prince (Get it On): A Blooper Reel

Authors: ph34r teh sistahs (Impatient and Sage)

Rating: M ((For... ummm... stuff...) Chapters will be rated separately though)

Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not ours. Curses! He (and his world) belong to JK Rowling and many other people none of which are us.

Author's Note: This would be best if read alongside the book. Not only are there incredible SPOILERS, but the bloopers will just make much more sense that way.

Chapter Three

(Rated K+)

Will and Won't (Harry Shimmy like Voldemort)

Harry Potter was snoring loudly.

Wait. That's not a blooper.

The misty fug his breath had left on the window sparkled in the orange glare of the streetlamp outside – Harry jerked awake.

"Why am I breathing fug on the window? What is 'fug'? Why is it sparkling?"

"Shut up you whiny brat and go back to sleep. You try being an editor and then you can make fun of them." Sage scolded.

"Honestly, that boy is so ungrateful. To make fun of an editing error... that's so immature." Impatient agreed.

Harry grunted in his sleep and his face slid down the window an inch or so, making his glasses still more lopsided, but he did not wake up.

Wait. Again, not a blooper. Apologies.

Harry grunted in his sleep and his face slid down the window an inch or so, making his glasses still more lopsided, but he did not wake up.

Silently, Sirius crept onto the set, sneaking up behind the sleeping Harry. He reached round his face, moving to remove the lopsided glasses, accidentally tripping over an apple core and knocking Harry with so much force that the boy toppled out the window onto the empty street below.

"Sirius!" Impatient's threatened to explode.

"I was just trying to make him more comfortable, I swear. I wasn't trying to pocket those spectacles."

"I believe him." Sage said, batting her eyelashes.

"HELP ME!" Harry's cries echoed faintly through the broken window.

"Don't worry Harry," said Impatient consolingly, "Dumbledore should be around any minute. He'll take care of you."

Yay! A real blooper!

"It is a long time since my last visit," said Dumbledore, peering down his crooked nose at Uncle Vernon. "I must say, your agapanthus are flourishing."

"FLOWERS!" Shrieked Sage. "Where are they? Have you got them in full sun? How often do you water them? I find I barely have to water mine but once a week. And which color? I find some colors do better than others, particularly–" But, alas, she could not continue for her sistah had dragged her off the set by the back the shirt.

"Give him an order," said Dumbledore. "If he has passed into your ownership, he will have to obey. If not, then we shall have to think of some other means of keeping him from his rightful mistress."

"Won't, Won't, Won't, WON'T!"

Kreacher's voice had risen to a scream. Harry could think of nothing to say except, "Kreacher, teach me to shimmy!"

Dumbledore looked from Kreacher's shimmying figure to Harry's, and sighed, "Oh dear."

Both Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon looked around instinctively, as though expecting to see someone other than Dudley squeezed between them. And there was. Voldemort grinning, red eyes flashing.

"Fancy a day trip? I know this really nice cave..."

"Really?" said Dumbledore, looking intrigued.

Author's Note: Sorry was short-- we fought... we're sistahs, give us a break.